Rsvp Etiquette: Wedding Invitation Response Essentials

A wedding RSVP card is a crucial part of the wedding invitation suite, giving guests a taste of the wedding theme and allowing the couple to finalise their guest list and plan accordingly. This article will cover everything you need to include on your wedding RSVP card to ensure your big day goes smoothly.

RSVP deadline date

The RSVP deadline is a critical element of any wedding invitation. It lets guests know the last day for replying and helps the couple finalise their guest list and catering requirements. Here are some tips and examples for setting and communicating the RSVP deadline:

Setting the RSVP deadline

It is recommended that the RSVP deadline is set for three to four weeks before the wedding date. This allows the couple and their vendors to finalise any last-minute details that depend on the total guest count, such as the amount of food and drinks needed and the seating chart.

Communicating the RSVP deadline

The RSVP deadline should be featured prominently on the invitation, often with the deadline wording ("Kindly reply by [insert date]") in a large font size and placed front and centre on the card. Here are some examples of wording for the RSVP deadline section:

• RSVP by 05/01/2020
• Please RSVP no later than 05/01/2020
• Please reply by 05.01.2020
• Kindly reply by May First
• Reply by 05.01.2020
• Please respond by May First
• Kindly let us know by 05.01.2020
• The favour of your reply is requested by May First

You can also add a creative or humorous twist to this section:

• RSVP by May 1st or forever hold your peace
• RSVP by May 1st or we will use at least 4 forms of communication to hassle you

Following up with guests

Even with a clear deadline, some guests may need a reminder or follow-up. It is recommended to give guests a one-week grace period after the deadline before contacting them for a response.

Space for guests' names

Traditionally, the guests' names section begins with an "M" line, where guests write their titles (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) before their names. However, some couples choose to replace this with a more casual "Name(s)" followed by a line to be filled out.

To avoid confusion and ensure proper etiquette, it is essential that guests write their full names, including titles, and the names of any additional invited guests, such as a plus one or children. This information helps the couple finalise the guest list and create a personal experience for each attendee.

To make the process smoother, some couples choose to number their RSVP cards and subtly pencil the corresponding number on the back of each card. This way, even if a guest forgets to write their name or it is challenging to read, the couple can still identify who the response is from.

Additionally, it is crucial to address the wedding invitations clearly to prevent guests from adding extra, uninvited attendees to their RSVP cards.

An accept or decline checkbox

The accept or decline checkbox is also an opportunity to get creative. You can use the weather and destination to inspire your phrasing. For example, "_we're so there for the tropical beauty_ (destination)" or "_we'll be there before the flowers bloom_ (summer)".

If you want to stick to a more traditional phrasing, you could use:

• Accepts with pleasure
• Declines with regret
• Accepts with pleasure / declines with regret
• Will attend / unable to attend
• Yes, we're there / no, we can't make it

You could also add a fun twist to the traditional phrasing:

• Yes, let's get the party started / no, and I don't like how I feel about not attending
• I'm definitely showing up / can't make it and I feel horrible about it
• Yes, there's no party till I show up! / No, you guys have fun without me

It's important to set an RSVP deadline so that you're not left following up with half your guest list. This should be around four weeks before the wedding date.

Entree preference

When it comes to wedding invitations, it's important to include an RSVP card to give your guests a taste of your wedding theme and allow them to specify any dietary requirements they may have. Here are some tips and suggestions for including an "Entrée Preference" section on your RSVP cards:

• Buffet vs Plated Dinner: If you're having a buffet at your wedding reception, you can likely skip the "Entrée Preference" section altogether. However, if you're serving a plated entrée, it's essential to give your guests a choice of dishes. List two or three entrée options and ask your guests to indicate their preference.
• Tallying Preferences: If your guests are allowed to bring a plus-one or multiple guests, you'll need to know the entrée preference for each person. Ask your guests to tally the number of people choosing each entrée option and place that number next to the corresponding entrée.
• Special Dietary Restrictions: In addition to indicating their preference, your guests may have specific dietary restrictions or allergies. You can include a separate line or section for guests to mention any allergies or special requests, such as "nut-free" or "vegan option."
• Sample Wording: When writing the "Entrée Preference" section, you can use wording such as "Please initial the meal choice for each guest" or "Entrée Preference: [list options]." Here's an example:

"The favor of your response is requested by [date]

___ Joyfully Accepts ___ Regretfully Declines

Please initial the meal choice for each guest:

_____ Cabernet Filet Mignon

____ Baked Salmon Filet

____ Quinoa with Tempeh"

Digital RSVPs: If you're considering digital RSVPs, you can still include entrée preferences. On your wedding website, you can use the "custom questions" feature to ask about meal preferences. This allows guests to submit their responses online, making it convenient for both you and your guests.

Remember, the "Entrée Preference" section is an essential part of your RSVP cards, especially if you want to ensure your guests' dietary needs are accommodated. By providing clear options and instructions, you'll be well on your way to a well-organised and enjoyable wedding reception.

Additional requests

The additional requests section of your RSVP card is a great opportunity to inject some fun and creativity into your wedding planning. It is also a practical way to gather important information from your guests to help finalise the details of your big day. Here are some ideas for additional requests to include on your RSVP card:

Song Requests

Asking your guests to request their favourite songs is a great way to get them involved in creating your wedding playlist. It can also be a fun ice-breaker, with guests discussing their choices on the day.

Drink Preferences

If you want to stock your bar with drinks your guests will enjoy, ask them to list their drink of choice. This can be a fun way to ensure your guests' favourites are available and give you an idea of how much to stock up on.

Arrival Time

Knowing when your guests plan to arrive can help you plan the schedule for your wedding day. It can also be useful for organising accommodation and transport for guests, especially if you have guests travelling from out of town.

Advice for the Newlyweds

Including a request for marriage advice or words of wisdom can be a thoughtful touch. It gives your guests a chance to share their own experiences and can provide you with some heartfelt keepsakes to look back on.

Special Accommodations

Allowing space for guests to note any special accommodations or requirements ensures that you can cater to their needs. This could include dietary restrictions, accessibility needs, or any other important information that will help you create a comfortable and inclusive celebration.

A Personal Note

Encouraging your guests to share a personal note or message is a wonderful way to add a unique and heartfelt touch to your RSVP cards. It can be a space for guests to share their excitement, well-wishes, or a simple "congratulations".

Remember, the additional requests section is an optional feature of your RSVP card, so feel free to include only the requests that are most relevant to your wedding plans and style.

Frequently asked questions