Bridesmaid's Dress: Overpriced And A Right To Complain?

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour but it can also be a major financial commitment. One of the biggest questions is: who pays for the bridesmaid dresses? While it is customary for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, the bride will often have a specific vision of what the bridesmaids are going to wear, which can be expensive. So, can you complain about the price of a bridesmaid's dress?

Budgeting for the bridesmaid dress

Budgeting for a bridesmaid dress can be tricky, but with some careful planning, it can be done successfully. Here are some tips to help you stay within your budget:

Consult with your bridal party:

It is important to talk to your bridesmaids about their budgets and choose a dress that everyone is comfortable with. Remember that each person has their own financial situation, so be considerate of their limits. You can offer a few price ranges, such as $100 to $200, $200 to $350, or $350+, to make it easier for them to decide.

Offer to pay the difference:

If the dress you want is slightly above someone's budget, you can offer to pay the difference or cover alteration costs. This way, you can still get the dress you want while being mindful of their financial constraints.

Consider pre-owned or rented dresses:

Look for pre-owned dresses on websites like eBay or Poshmark. You might be able to find the same dress for a lower price. Alternatively, consider renting dresses from websites like Rent the Runway, which offers a more sustainable and cost-effective option.

Embrace mismatched looks:

Instead of having all your bridesmaids wear the same dress, you can choose a specific color or color palette and let them pick their own styles. This allows them to find dresses within their budgets and ensures they feel comfortable and confident on your big day.

Be mindful of additional costs:

Remember to consider the cost of accessories, alterations, and pre-wedding events when budgeting for the bridesmaid dress. These extra expenses can add up quickly, so be sure to factor them into your overall budget.

Try before you buy:

Take advantage of at-home try-on services offered by some retailers, such as Azazie, Kennedy Blue, and Revelry. This way, you can find the perfect dress without having to buy multiple options at full price.

Remember, open communication with your bridal party is key to successful budgeting. Be considerate of their financial situations, and don't be afraid to get creative to find cost-effective solutions.

Who pays for the bridesmaid dress

There are varying opinions on who pays for the bridesmaid dresses. While it is customary and expected for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, there are a few scenarios to consider.

Scenario One: Bride Pays

If the wedding budget allows, the bride may opt to cover the costs of the bridesmaids' dresses herself, especially if she has a small bridal party or has her heart set on expensive dresses. This scenario also applies if a bridesmaid cannot afford the dress; the couple may cover the cost as a kind gesture, but this should be kept private to avoid awkwardness or resentment among the other bridesmaids.

Scenario Two: Bridesmaids Pay

It is acceptable to ask bridesmaids to pay for their dresses, as this is implied when accepting an invitation to be part of the bridal party. In this case, the bride should be upfront about the expected costs, and it is important to consider the bridesmaids' budgets when choosing a dress style.

Scenario Three: Bride Helps with Costs

In this scenario, bridesmaids pay for their dresses, but the bride offers financial assistance where needed. For example, if a bridesmaid is a student or unemployed, the bride may help pay for all or part of the dress or cover the cost of alterations. This approach should be handled gracefully and on a case-by-case basis, as the bride's friends are participating in the wedding out of love and support.

Other Considerations

Regardless of who pays for the dresses, there are ways to reduce costs. One option is to allow bridesmaids to choose their own dresses within a specified colour or style palette, which provides flexibility and ensures they feel comfortable and beautiful. Another option is to opt for mismatched dresses, allowing bridesmaids to select more affordable options that suit their individual body types and budgets.

Additionally, it is important to consider the various other expenses that bridesmaids may incur, such as hair and makeup, accessories, travel, and gifts. Being transparent about financial expectations from the outset can alleviate potential stressors and ensure a harmonious bridal party.

Cost of accessories and alterations

Accessories and alterations are a key part of the bridesmaid's outfit and can add significantly to the overall cost. It is therefore important to consider these additional expenses when budgeting for a wedding.

Accessories

Bridesmaids are usually expected to pay for their own accessories, which can include jewellery, shoes, and underwear. To keep costs down, it is worth checking if you already have suitable accessories or if you can borrow them from someone. Thrift stores and websites like Facebook Marketplace are also good options for finding accessories on a budget.

Alterations

On average, bridesmaid dress alterations cost between $45 and $150, but this can vary depending on the extent of the alterations, the fabric of the dress, and where you live. More complex alterations, such as adjusting the bust, waist, or hips, will cost more, typically around $150 or higher. It is also worth noting that the material of the dress can affect the cost, with intricate beading or appliqué requiring more work and increasing the price.

Some common types of bridesmaid dress alterations include:

• Hemming: Shortening the length of the dress, typically costs between $15 and $225.
• Taking in the sides: Altering the dress to fit the body shape and curves, usually costs around $20 to $130.
• Adjusting straps: Shortening or removing straps for a better fit, typically costs $15 to $80.
• Adjusting sleeves: Shortening or removing sleeves, or adding long sleeves, costs $30 to $80.
• Altering the neckline: Adjusting the neckline to show more or less skin, usually costs $50 to $240.
• Altering the back: Opening up the back or adding laces for a different style or comfort, costs $90 to $230.
• Altering the closure: Changing the closure from a zipper to buttons or a corset back, costs $50 to $180.

The type of fabric can also impact the cost of alterations, with silk, chiffon, organza, and jersey being more challenging and expensive to alter than cotton and linen. Additionally, dresses with multiple layers, laces, beads, or other intricate details will also increase the cost of alterations.

It is recommended to bring your dress to a seamstress or tailor at least two months before the wedding to allow time for any necessary alterations. On average, alterations take one to three weeks to complete, and at least three one-hour fittings are needed to ensure the perfect fit.

In summary, the cost of accessories and alterations for a bridesmaid's outfit can vary widely depending on individual choices and requirements. It is important to consider these additional expenses when budgeting for a wedding and to communicate openly with the bridal party about financial expectations and limitations.

Renting or buying second-hand

Renting

Renting bridesmaid dresses is a cost-efficient option, with prices starting from $30 for a four-day rental. Rent the Runway, Poshare, StyleLend, and NUULY are all websites that offer bridesmaid dress rentals. Rent the Runway, for example, offers two sizes for no additional fee, ensuring the perfect fit. Poshare allows you to borrow directly from the wardrobes of others, with prices starting at $50, up to 85% less than the original price. StyleLend offers rental insurance for $5, so if the dress is damaged, there are no extra costs. NUULY is a subscription service, allowing you to rent a certain number of pieces per month, which is ideal if you're part of a wedding party that requires multiple outfits.

Buying Second-Hand

If you're looking to buy second-hand, eBay and Poshmark are good options to find pre-owned dresses. Etsy is another great choice, as you can send in your measurements or pick your size, and prices start at around $50.

Other Options

If you're looking for an affordable new dress, there are plenty of options under $100-120 from David's Bridal, Azazie, Asos, Etsy shops, and Lulus.

Communicating budget concerns

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honor, but it can also be a major financial commitment. It's important to be honest about what you can realistically afford to avoid any misunderstandings or resentment. Here are some tips for communicating budget concerns effectively:

• Frequent and transparent communication: Keep an open line of communication with the bride and other bridesmaids about your financial status and what you can comfortably afford. This will help manage expectations and ensure that everyone is on the same page.
• Ask about the budget early on: Don't be afraid to ask the bride about the expected costs early in the planning process. This will give you a better idea of what expenses to anticipate and allow you to voice any concerns or limitations.
• Be respectful and considerate: When discussing budget concerns, always be respectful and considerate of the bride's wishes and vision for her wedding. Remember that she may also be facing financial constraints, so work together to find solutions that accommodate both your needs.
• Offer alternative solutions: If you're unable to meet certain financial expectations, offer alternative ways to contribute. For example, you could suggest assisting with planning duties, day-of tasks, or providing non-monetary support. This shows that you're still committed to being a helpful and supportive bridesmaid.
• Provide suggestions for cost-saving measures: If the bridesmaid dress or other expenses are outside your budget, suggest ways to reduce costs. This could include proposing less expensive dress options, exploring rental or pre-owned dresses, or even suggesting a mismatched bridesmaid dress trend, allowing each bridesmaid to choose a dress within their budget.
• Private conversations: When discussing budget concerns, it's best to speak privately with the bride or other individuals involved. This ensures that everyone's privacy is respected and prevents any potential embarrassment.
• Be mindful of additional costs: Remember to consider not only the cost of the bridesmaid dress but also additional expenses such as accessories, alterations, travel, accommodations, and other pre-wedding events. Communicate your ability to participate in these extra costs clearly to avoid any surprises.
• Group discussions: If there are multiple bridesmaids, suggest a group discussion about budgets. This can help you understand others' financial situations and work together to find solutions or compromises that accommodate everyone's limitations.
• Prioritize honesty and transparency: Always be honest about your financial situation. It's better to be upfront about your budget constraints than to agree to something you can't afford, as this can create stress and resentment down the line. Remember, open communication fosters a healthier relationship.

Frequently asked questions