Crafting A Memorable Best Man Speech: Topics To Discuss

what to discuss in best man speech

Being asked to give a best man speech can be nerve-wracking, but it's also a tough honour. The best man's speech traditionally follows the groom's speech and may be followed by the maid of honour's toast. It's a chance to say kind words about your relationship with the couple and your best friend. Wedding speeches are meant to be quick, lighthearted moments during the reception, so while you should put effort into crafting thoughtful words, you don't have to overthink it.

- Introduce yourself: Share how you met the groom, which will help establish your connection to the audience, especially those who may not know you well. You can also add a humorous tale about your first encounter.

- Share a story: Add one or two anecdotes, like your favourite memories with the groom (and their partner, if you want). Avoid choosing a story that rambles on and has no sentimental or funny ending—keep it lighthearted and short.

- Talk about the couple's relationship: Share how they first met and how their relationship has grown so that the guests can get a better insight into the newlyweds. If you helped them meet, you can say something like, I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two.

- Say a few words about the groom's new spouse: Give a special shout-out to the new spouse so they feel welcomed and included. Talk about the qualities you like about them and why you love them in the groom's life.

- Give advice and compliments: Giving some heartfelt and friendly advice is customary in a best man speech. If you are married, you and your partner could come up with some golden rules for a happy marriage.

- Acknowledge the bridal party: If there are bridesmaids, thank them for their role on the day and for everything they've done in the lead-up to the wedding.

- Conclude with a toast: Finish your speech by raising a glass and wishing the couple a future filled with happiness.

Characteristics Values
Introduce yourself Your name and your relation to the groom
Icebreaker A joke or a quote
Thank the other speakers Show gratitude to the previous speaker and the couple's parents
Share stories Include one or two anecdotes about the groom and the couple
Give advice Provide light-hearted yet sincere advice
Compliment the couple Highlight the groom's qualities and the couple's relationship
Acknowledge the bridal party Thank the bridesmaids
Final toast Raise a glass and wish the couple happiness

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Introduce yourself and your friendship with the groom

Good evening everyone, I'm [Name], and I've known [groom] since we were children/teens/university students/colleagues. In fact, I remember the first time we met as if it were yesterday. It was [year] and we were both [doing an activity]. I'll always remember [groom]'s clothing choice/hair/enthusiasm for the activity. I knew right away that we'd be friends.

[Groom] is the kind of friend who [insert anecdote about their friendship]. He's always been there for me, from [anecdote about their friendship] to [anecdote about their friendship]. I'll always be grateful to have him in my life.

Another option

Good evening, I'm [Name], and I'm honoured to be [groom]'s best man today. I've known [groom] since [year] when we [met at school/university/work]. I still remember the first time we [did an activity together]. [Groom] was the only one who [did something funny or impressive]. I knew right away that we'd be friends.

Over the years, we've been through a lot together. From [anecdote] to [anecdote], we've always had each other's backs. [Groom] is the kind of friend who [insert anecdote about their friendship]. I feel so lucky to have him in my life.

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Thank the other speakers

Thanking the other speakers is a crucial aspect of a best man's speech. It is an opportunity to acknowledge the previous speaker and set the tone for your own speech. Here are four to six paragraphs with ideas and examples to help you craft this section of your speech:

Paragraph 1:

"Let's give a round of applause and show our appreciation for the wonderful speech given by the maid of honour. She set a high bar with her thoughtful and sweet words, so get your tissues ready because things are about to get a little emotional up here!"

Paragraph 2:

"I want to express my sincere gratitude to the couple's parents, who raised these incredible people whom I am fortunate to call my best friends. I also want to thank them for hosting this amazing celebration and making us all feel so welcome. We are truly grateful for your generosity and hospitality."

Paragraph 3:

"A special thank you to the best man, John, for his kind words and for being an excellent friend to the groom. John, your speech was heartfelt and hilarious, and it perfectly captured the spirit of the groom. I know the groom values your friendship deeply, and your presence here today means a lot to him."

Paragraph 4:

"I'd like to thank the groomsmen, who have been incredibly supportive throughout the wedding planning process. They have gone above and beyond to ensure that today is memorable for the happy couple. A round of applause for the groomsmen, please!"

Paragraph 5:

"I also want to acknowledge the bridesmaids and thank them for all their hard work and dedication. They have been by the bride's side every step of the way, offering their love and support. Their presence has added so much joy and beauty to this special day. Let's show our appreciation for these wonderful ladies!"

Paragraph 6:

"Lastly, I want to thank all the guests for being here today and sharing in this joyful occasion. Your presence means a lot to the newlyweds, and I know they feel blessed to be surrounded by so many loved ones. Thank you for your well-wishes and for being a part of this celebration."

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Share a story or two about the groom

Sharing a story or two about the groom is a great way to make your best man speech stand out and give it a personal touch. Here are four to six paragraphs with detailed stories about the groom to include in your best man speech:

The Time They First Met

"I remember the first time I met [Groom]. It was at a place where they met and I immediately knew we would hit it off. We bonded over [shared interest] and spent the whole night [doing something funny or unusual]. I knew then that this guy was someone special, and I'm so glad that [Groom's partner] feels the same way."

A Funny Story

"One time, [Groom] and I went on a trip to [place]. We had a blast, but there was one moment that stood out. [Groom] decided to [do something funny or unusual], and let's just say it didn't go as planned. Despite the chaos that ensued, we laughed until our stomachs hurt. That's the kind of friend [Groom] is—always up for an adventure and ready to turn any mishap into a hilarious memory."

A Heartwarming Story

"There are so many things I admire about [Groom], but one quality that truly stands out is his [positive trait]. I'll never forget the time when [describe a situation where this trait was evident]. It was a challenging moment, but [Groom] approached it with [explain how he demonstrated this trait]. It's this kind of strength and resilience that makes him such an incredible person and a wonderful partner to [Groom's partner]."

A Story About Their Relationship

"I've had the privilege of witnessing [Groom] and [Groom's partner]'s relationship blossom over the years. From the moment they met, it was clear they had something special. I remember one particular date where [describe a funny, sweet, or romantic date they went on]. It's these little moments that have built their love into what it is today, and it's an honour to stand here and celebrate their commitment to each other."

A Story About the Groom's Personal Growth

"When I first met [Groom], he was [describe how he was when you first met]. Don't get me wrong, he was a great guy, but [explain how he has grown and changed]. A lot of this change has come about since meeting [Groom's partner]. She has brought out the best in him and supported his journey towards [explain how he has grown]. It's incredible to see the person he has become, and I know that [Groom's partner] has played a huge part in that."

A Sentimental Story

"I want to share a quote that I feel sums up [Groom] perfectly. It's something he said to me once during a difficult time in my life, and it's always stuck with me. [Groom] said, ' [quote or piece of advice that reflects his character].' This quote has gotten me through some tough times, and it perfectly encapsulates the kind of person [Groom] is—wise, compassionate, and always there for his friends. I know that [Groom's partner] has also found strength in these words, and it's a beautiful reflection of the love and support they share."

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Say a few words about the groom's new spouse

Saying a few words about the groom's new spouse is an important part of the best man's speech. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft this section effectively:

Highlight the Groom's New Spouse's Positive Qualities:

Talk about the qualities you admire in the groom's new spouse and how they complement the groom. Mention their grace, intelligence, confidence, or any other attributes that have made a positive impact on the groom's life. For example: "I'm so happy [Spouse's Name] fell in love with [Groom's Name]. Firsthand I've seen the grace, intelligence, and confidence [Spouse's Name] has, which explains why [Groom's Name] knew he wanted to marry [Spouse's Name] after their first date."

Share How the New Spouse Has Affected the Groom:

Discuss how the groom has changed or improved since meeting their spouse. Has the new spouse encouraged the groom to become more responsible, outgoing, or adventurous? Have they pushed the groom to pursue new interests or achieve new goals? For instance, you could say: "I've noticed that [Groom's Name] always sounds excited when talking about [Spouse's Name]. He's taken up new hobbies and even started dressing better since meeting them. It's clear that [Spouse's Name] has brought out a more confident and adventurous side to [Groom's Name]."

Include a Short Anecdote or Two:

If you have any short and lighthearted anecdotes about the couple, now is the time to share them. These stories should showcase the bond between the groom and their new spouse. Avoid rambling or sharing need-to-know details. For example: "I remember when [Groom's Name] and [Spouse's Name] first started dating. [Groom's Name] was so nervous on their first date that he wore a tie, and we later found out it was actually a Christmas decoration. It's safe to say that [Spouse's Name] brought out a more fashionable side of [Groom's Name]!"

Compliment the Couple and Wish Them Well:

Conclude this section by complimenting the couple and expressing your happiness for them. You can also share your well-wishes for their future together. For instance: "[Spouse's Name], you look absolutely stunning today, and it's clear that [Groom's Name] is head over heels for you. I wish you both all the best as you embark on this new chapter of your lives together. Cheers to the happy couple!"

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Talk about the couple's relationship

Talking about the couple's relationship is a key part of the best man's speech. Here are four to six paragraphs with ideas on what to say:

How They Met

Share the story of how the couple met, especially if you played a role in it. This is a great way to give the guests insight into the newly-weds and their unique connection. You can add a touch of humour by saying something like, "I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two eight years ago."

Their Perfect Match

Talk about how the couple is a great match for each other. Mention specific qualities that make them well-suited. For example, "You've achieved what no coach could – you've got him to follow directions, stick to a game plan, and occasionally wear matching socks. You've even got him watching rom-coms without checking the sports scores every five minutes."

How the Bride Has Impacted the Groom

Discuss how the bride has positively influenced the groom. Has she encouraged him to pursue new interests or become more responsible? For instance, "I'm so happy [Spouse's Name] fell in love with [Groom's Name]. Firsthand I've seen the grace, intelligence and confidence [Spouse's Name] has, which explains why [Groom's Name] knew he wanted to marry [Spouse's Name] after their first date."

Their Relationship Journey

Share the journey of their relationship, from the early dating days to their engagement. Mention specific moments or milestones that stood out. For example, "Their love story isn't just about grand gestures or perfect moments. It's about the quiet understanding between two people who just fit together."

How the Couple Has Grown Together

Talk about how the couple has grown and changed together. Have they overcome challenges or supported each other through difficult times? For example, "Their relationship has had all the hallmarks of a tech startup: the beta testing phase (dating), the soft launch (moving in together), and now the full release (marriage). There were a few crashes along the way – like when he tried to impress her by cooking and nearly had to call tech support for the smoke alarm."

Their Future Together

Offer well-wishes and predictions for their future together. You can add a touch of humour here as well. For example, "May your love story be long, your arguments short, and your Netflix queue perfectly balanced."

Frequently asked questions

A best man speech should be concise, lasting between three and ten minutes.

A best man speech should include an introduction, anecdotes about the groom, a mention of the couple's relationship, and a toast to the couple.

Avoid embarrassing stories, inside jokes, and offensive material.

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