The Best Man's Guide To Wedding Day Duties

what is expected of the best man at a wedding

The best man is the groom's right-hand man and plays a crucial role in the wedding. The role is usually given to the groom's closest friend or family member, who acts as a confidante and provides support throughout the planning process and on the big day itself. The best man's duties include planning the bachelor party, writing and delivering a speech, helping choose the groomsmen's attire, and keeping the wedding rings safe. He also acts as a point of contact for the groom's side, including groomsmen and family members, and ensures everyone is well-informed and on schedule. While the specific tasks may vary depending on the couple's dynamics and preferences, the best man is expected to be the groom's trusted companion and assistant before, during, and after the wedding.

Characteristics Values
Help with preparations Help with selecting venues, coordinating with vendors, and offering opinions about other details
Be the groom's friend and confidante Offer emotional support and guidance
Organise the bachelor party Plan an "epic" party, including setting a date and budget
Help choose the groomsmen's attire Assist with suit shopping and scheduling fittings
Give a memorable speech Prepare a "best man's speech" to be read at the reception
Keep the wedding rings safe Hold the rings until it is time for the couple to exchange them
Stand next to the groom during the ceremony Escort the maid of honour out of the ceremony
Act as a legal witness Sign the marriage license
Assist the groom on the wedding day Help the groom get dressed, remind him to breathe, and ensure he eats and drinks
Assist with logistics Help with the pre-wedding set-up, coordinate with vendors, and guide guests
Be the master of ceremonies Announce key elements like the couple's arrival and the speeches
Get the party started Lead the dance floor and encourage guests to take part
Return and clean suits Round up and return hired items, and take care of wedding gifts

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Help the groom with wedding preparations and be his friend and confidant

Being the best man at a wedding is a big responsibility and a great honour. The best man is the groom's right-hand man and is expected to be his friend, confidant and personal valet throughout the wedding planning process and on the big day itself.

The best man is often the groom's closest friend or relative and is chosen because of the deep relationship and trust between the two men. The role is active and sometimes hectic, but it is an expression of the bond between them.

In the lead-up to the wedding, the best man should be on hand to offer emotional support and a listening ear. He should also help with the planning and coordination of the bachelor party, and may be involved in selecting the venue and choosing the groom's and groomsmen's attire. He may also be asked to coordinate with vendors and offer opinions on other details.

The best man's role on the wedding day itself is to support the groom in any way possible, from helping him get dressed to reminding him to breathe! He is also responsible for keeping the wedding rings safe and making sure the groom and groomsmen are in the right place at the right time.

The best man is also expected to give a speech during the reception, which should be insightful and entertaining, offering sincere well-wishes to the newlyweds and including lighthearted anecdotes about the groom.

Overall, the best man's role is to ensure the groom's wishes are fulfilled and that the wedding runs smoothly, providing both practical and emotional support.

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Plan the bachelor party

Planning the bachelor party is one of the best man's most important duties. It's the best man's moment to shine and usually their first task. The bachelor party, or stag do, is an event that celebrates the groom's last days as a single man.

The best man should check with the groom for a list of people he would like to attend and think carefully about locations. It's important to consider everyone's budget when planning the party – a big blowout in Vegas might sound amazing, but if only a few people can afford to go, it might be better to plan something closer to home.

The best man should also pick two or three dates and ask the rest of the group which they can attend before confirming the date that works for the majority. This is the easiest way to organise a large group of people without too much back and forth. The bachelor party should ideally take place one to three months before the wedding to give everyone time to recover.

The best man should also think about ways to personalise the party, including games and funny pranks to play on the groom (nothing that will get him arrested, though!).

While the groom's expenses are usually covered, the best man is not expected to pay for the entire party. The cost should be split evenly among everyone who attends, except for the groom.

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Give a best man's speech

So, you've been asked to be the best man at a wedding—congratulations! It's a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. One of your most important duties is to give a speech at the wedding reception. Here are some tips to help you prepare and deliver a memorable best man's speech.

Before the Speech

Before you start writing your speech, it's important to understand the context of the wedding. Discuss with the couple what they expect from your speech. Will it be traditional or more modern? Are there any cultural or religious customs you should be aware of? Knowing these details will help you tailor your speech accordingly.

It's also a good idea to coordinate with the other speakers, such as the father of the bride, the groom, or the maid of honour, to ensure your speeches complement each other and don't overlap too much.

Writing the Speech

The best man's speech is typically light-hearted and entertaining, with sincere well-wishes for the newlyweds. It's an opportunity to share anecdotes about the groom and honour your friendship. Here are some key elements to consider including:

  • A warm greeting and introduction: Thank the guests for coming and introduce yourself as the best man.
  • A tribute to the couple: Share a story or two about the groom and how he and the bride met. This can be a funny or heartfelt moment that showcases their relationship.
  • Words of wisdom: Offer some light-hearted advice for a happy marriage, or share a quote or poem about love and marriage.
  • A toast: Raise your glass and invite the guests to join you in wishing the couple a lifetime of happiness.

Remember to keep your speech appropriate for the audience. Avoid inside jokes that only a few people will understand, and steer clear of embarrassing stories or inappropriate topics. It's a good idea to run your speech by a trusted friend or family member to get a second opinion.

Delivering the Speech

Practice your speech beforehand so that you feel comfortable and confident on the day. Here are some tips for delivering your speech:

  • Speak slowly and clearly: Take your time and articulate your words so that everyone can understand you.
  • Pause for laughter: If you've included jokes or humorous moments, give the audience time to react and enjoy the moment.
  • Make eye contact: Connect with the couple and the guests by looking up from your notes and engaging with your audience.
  • Stay calm: It's natural to feel nervous, but try to relax and enjoy the moment. Take a few deep breaths before you begin, and remember that everyone wants you to succeed.

After the Speech

Once you've delivered your speech, you can relax and enjoy the rest of the reception. However, as the best man, you may still have other duties to fulfil, such as coordinating activities or assisting with logistics. Remember to stay attentive and be a source of support for the couple throughout the celebration.

The Best Man's Arrival: When and How

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Keep the wedding rings safe

Keeping the wedding rings safe is one of the most important duties of the best man. Here are some tips to ensure that the rings are secure:

  • Designate a safe place for the rings. This could be a pocket in a suit jacket or pants that zips or buttons closed, or even a small bag or box that can be easily transported and accessed when needed.
  • Triple-check that your pockets do not have any holes!
  • If you are also the ring bearer, make sure you have the rings on hand during the ceremony, ready for when the couple exchanges their vows.
  • If there is a separate ring bearer, ensure that they have the rings before the ceremony begins and that they pass them to you for safekeeping until the officiant requests them.
  • Have a backup plan: it might be a good idea to keep duplicate rings or symbolic stand-ins in case of an emergency.
  • Stay calm and don't panic if you lose the rings. Retrace your steps and check recent places you've been. Inform the bride and groom as soon as possible if you can't find the rings.
  • Be mindful of your responsibilities throughout the day. The best man has many duties, so it's easy to get distracted. Ensure you always know where the rings are and that they are secure.

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Assist the groom on the wedding day

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. The best man is the groom's right-hand man, and it's his job to support the groom in any way he can on the wedding day. Here are some ways in which the best man can assist the groom:

Help the groom get ready

The best man should be on hand to help the groom with any last-minute tasks on the morning of the wedding. This could include anything from helping the groom to get dressed, to reminding him to breathe! The best man should also make sure the groom arrives at the venue on time, usually around 20 minutes before the ceremony is due to begin.

Keep the rings safe

One of the best man's most important duties is to keep the wedding rings safe until they are needed during the ceremony. This is a big responsibility, as the rings are not only precious metals but also symbols of love, trust, and lifelong commitment.

Deliver the groom's phone and personal items

The groom will have a lot on his mind on his wedding day, so the best man can help by holding onto his phone, wallet, and any other personal items he might need throughout the day.

Keep the groom calm and stress-free

The best man should do his best to keep the groom calm and stress-free on the big day. This might involve reminding the groom to eat and drink (and not too much booze!), as well as providing emotional support and reassurance if needed.

Check the groom's outfit

The best man should make sure the groom's outfit is looking sharp and that there are no wardrobe malfunctions waiting to happen. This includes checking the groom's tie, shoes, and any other accessories.

Stand beside the groom at the altar

During the wedding ceremony, the best man traditionally stands next to the groom at the altar. If the best man is also the ring bearer, he will need to have the rings ready to hand when the couple exchanges them.

Escort the maid of honour

If there is a maid of honour, it is traditional for the best man to escort her out of the room after the ceremony, before the newlyweds make their exit.

By carrying out these duties, the best man can ensure that the groom's day goes smoothly and that he can fully enjoy the celebrations.

Frequently asked questions

The best man is the groom's right-hand man and is responsible for supporting the groom throughout the wedding planning process and on the big day. The best man also acts as a leader/point of contact for the groomsmen and ensures everyone is well-informed and on the same page.

Some of the key duties of a best man before the wedding include helping choose the groomsmen's attire, planning the bachelor party, writing the best man's speech, and providing emotional support to the groom.

On the wedding day, the best man helps the groom get ready, organises the ushers, keeps the wedding rings safe, greets the guests with the groom, stands at the altar with the groom, and delivers the best man's speech.

After the wedding, the best man may be responsible for returning hired items, taking care of wedding gifts, and ensuring the groom's clothing is cleaned or returned.

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