The Best Man: Groom's Perspective And Insights

The best man is the groom's right-hand man and, as such, has a lot of responsibilities. He is in charge of planning and organizing the bachelor party, serving as a point of contact for everyone on the groom's side, and giving a best man's speech. He also has to assist with outfit details, coordinate the groom's gift, and provide emotional support. The best man is also usually in charge of holding the wedding rings during the ceremony and signing the marriage license as a witness.

The groom's right-hand man

The best man is the groom's right-hand man throughout the planning process and on the day of the wedding. The best man is the groom's go-to guy and confidant, providing moral support and acting as a personal valet and logistics guru.

The best man is usually a close friend or relative of the groom, and it is an honour to be asked to take on this role. The groom is entrusting you to be by his side, to support and assist him in any way possible before and during the wedding.

As the best man, you will be in charge of leading the groomsmen, introducing them to each other if they don't already know one another, and coordinating their attire. You will also be responsible for planning the bachelor party, with the help of the other groomsmen, and making sure the groom has a great time.

On the day of the wedding, the best man will be the groom's personal aide, helping him get ready, delivering letters, calming pre-wedding jitters, and ensuring the groom eats and drinks. The best man will also hold the wedding rings until it is time for the couple to exchange their vows.

The best man will also be expected to give a speech during the reception, which should be well-crafted, focusing on the newlyweds and their love story, and can include something funny or embarrassing (but not too embarrassing!).

The best man is the groom's trusted confidant and advisor, and will be there to support him throughout the entire wedding process.

The best man's speech

So, you've been chosen as the best man for a wedding—congratulations! Now, it's time to prepare for one of the most important duties of the role: the best man's speech. Here are some tips and guidelines to help you craft a memorable and meaningful speech that will leave a lasting impression on the newlyweds and the guests.

• Start with Gratitude: Begin your speech by expressing your heartfelt gratitude. Thank the couple, the new wife especially, and those present. Showing appreciation sets a positive tone for your speech and helps break the ice. It's a simple yet powerful way to connect with your audience.
• Inject Some Humor: Adding a touch of humor to your speech can lighten the mood and engage your audience. Share a funny story or anecdote about the groom, but be cautious. Ensure that your humor is "public funny" rather than "privately embarrassing." It's a good idea to test your material with someone beforehand to make sure it lands well.
• Celebrate Your Friendship: Talk about what makes your friendship with the groom unique and special. Share how long you've been friends and compliment the groom. By honoring the groom, you also honor yourself as his chosen best man. Share a story or anecdote that showcases the groom's positive qualities and how he and the bride are a perfect match.
• Offer Well Wishes: Conclude your speech by wishing the couple all the best for their future together. This can be a heartfelt blessing, a toast, or simply a sincere expression of your hopes for their happiness and prosperity. Ask everyone in attendance to raise their glasses and join you in celebrating the newlyweds.
• Prepare and Practice: One of the biggest mistakes you can make is not preparing your speech in advance. Take the time to outline your key points and craft your message. Practice your speech beforehand to ensure it flows well and stays within an appropriate time frame. Remember, a well-prepared speech is more likely to be engaging and memorable.
• Keep it Balanced: Avoid making your speech too brief or too long. Find a happy medium that allows you to cover all your key points without losing the attention of your audience. Be mindful of the fact that there may be inside jokes or references that some guests won't understand. Make sure your speech is inclusive and that everyone in the room can follow along.
• Stay Sober: It's important to stay sober, or at least not intoxicated, when delivering your speech. A best man who is under the influence is more likely to ramble, forget important points, or say something inappropriate. Remember, this speech is about honoring the couple, so maintain your composure and save the wild celebrations for after your speech.
• Personalize Your Speech: Your speech should be tailored to the couple, especially the groom. Avoid generic remarks and strive to make your speech unique to your relationship with the groom. Share anecdotes or stories that highlight his personality and your friendship. This will make your speech more authentic and meaningful.
• Involve the Audience: Engage the audience by making eye contact, using hand gestures, and varying your tone and pace. Make your speech interactive by asking rhetorical questions or inviting the audience to imagine certain scenarios. Encourage guests to raise their glasses during your toast and create a warm and festive atmosphere.
• Be Mindful of Your Language: Choose your words carefully, especially when telling stories or jokes. Avoid offensive language or inappropriate topics that may make guests uncomfortable. Remember that your speech reflects not only on you but also on the couple and their families. Strive to create a positive and respectful atmosphere.

Remember, the key to a great best man's speech is preparation, sincerity, and a healthy dose of humor. Speak from the heart, celebrate the couple, and enjoy this special moment as you stand by your friend's side on their wedding day. Good luck and cheers!

Planning the bachelor party

• Start planning early: Begin planning at least three to six months in advance, especially if you have a large group or a complex itinerary. This will give you enough time to understand everyone's preferences and make any necessary bookings or reservations.
• Determine the guest list: Besides the groomsmen, you can also invite others who are close to the groom, such as friends and family members. Be sure to clear the guest list with the groom before sending out invitations.
• Choose a location and activities: Select a central theme and a vibe for the party. For example, a laid-back weekend at the beach or an action-packed camping trip. Plan two to three group outings that align with the groom's interests, such as golfing, visiting a brewery or distillery, or attending a sporting event.
• Consider the budget: Discuss the estimated costs for lodging and activities with the group, so they can make their arrangements. Be mindful of everyone's budget and offer optional events for those with financial constraints.
• Keep the groom involved: Let the groom decide how involved he wants to be in the planning process. Some grooms may want to be surprised, while others may want to actively participate in the planning to ensure a great weekend for everyone.
• Send out invitations: Spread the word via a group chat, sharing the date, location, and itinerary. Move the discussion to email when it's time to book hotels and flights.
• Handle payments: Typically, all attendees pay their way for food, lodging, and activities. Give everyone an estimate of these costs before collecting deposits or airfare payments.
• Include surprises: Adding a surprise element, such as flying in a friend or arranging an activity centred around the groom's hobbies, will make the party extra special.

Remember, the bachelor party is about celebrating the groom and creating lasting memories. By following these tips and working together with the groomsmen, you can plan an unforgettable event that the groom and everyone involved will cherish.

The best man's duties

The best man is the groom's right-hand man and go-to guy (or girl) throughout the engagement and wedding. The best man is usually a close friend or relative of the groom, and it is an honour to be asked to take on this role. Here is a detailed list of the best man's duties:

Before the Wedding

• Provide moral support during the ring selection.
• Lead the groomsmen: introduce everyone and facilitate getting-to-know-you drinks or start an email chain/group text if you are all in different locations.
• Shop for formalwear and coordinate the purchase: assist the groom in picking out everyone's attire and make sure each groomsman orders their outfit in time.
• Serve as a counsellor and confidant: be a supportive friend to the groom throughout the wedding planning process.
• Coordinate travel and accommodation for yourself and the groomsmen.
• Plan the bachelor party: talk to the groom about the type of party he wants and work with the groomsmen to plan a night or weekend that suits his style.
• Attend pre-wedding events: be present at the ceremony rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, as well as the engagement party and shower if applicable.

On the Wedding Day

• Create a best man emergency kit: stock up on essential toiletries, tissues, pain relievers, a stain remover, sewing kit, and extra accessories.
• Get dressed with the groom and groomsmen: play music, crack open some beers, and create a relaxed and upbeat atmosphere.
• Ensure the groomsmen are wearing their boutonnieres.
• Try to keep things on schedule: ask the couple for a timeline of events and help to round up anyone who is goofing off or not where they should be.
• Hold the wedding rings until the couple's ring exchange: keep the rings safe in your inner jacket pocket.
• Stand next to the groom during the ceremony: smile, stand up straight, and show your support.
• Deliver the officiant's payment after the ceremony.
• Sign the marriage license as a witness: the best man and maid of honour typically fill these roles.
• Pose for pictures: cooperate with the couple's photography requests.
• Stand next to the bride in the receiving line: greet guests as they enter during cocktail hour.
• Be announced with the maid of honour for the reception entrance.
• Answer guests' questions: be prepared to answer queries about the timeline of events, and direct guests to the venue coordinator or wedding planner if needed.
• Dance with the maid of honour during the first guest dance: if you would rather not, just make sure you are one of the first people on the dance floor to encourage others to join.
• Make sure the groom eats and drinks: keep him hydrated and well-fed.
• Give a best man speech: don't procrastinate, speak from the heart, and keep it short.

After the Wedding

• Help to organise and safe-keep gifts: collect gifts from guests and keep them in a safe location until the couple returns from their honeymoon.
• Hand out vendor tips: ensure cash is organised into labelled envelopes and given to the correct person.
• Make sure groomsmen return rented attire: send a few text reminders to the groomsmen to avoid late return fees.

The best man should also expect to pay for certain expenses, including travel and accommodation for the wedding, and pre-wedding grooming.

The best man's attire

The best man's outfit should complement the groom's without matching exactly and without overshadowing it. The groom and best man usually choose their suits or tuxedos on the same day and from the same tailor. If this isn't possible, the best man should find out what the groom is wearing and have his tailor work with that. The best man's suit or tuxedo should be one step removed from the groom's. For example, if the groom is wearing a white dinner jacket, the best man should wear black. If the groom is wearing a double-breasted coat, the best man should wear a single-breasted one.

The best man should adapt his look to the groom's. If the groom is wearing a tuxedo, the best man should do the same. If the groom is wearing a morning dress, the best man should follow suit. If the wedding is before 6 pm, the best man will wear a tuxedo or morning dress, depending on the groom's choice. If the wedding is after 6 pm, the best man should wear a tailcoat.

The best man's suit should be comfortable and appropriate. It should tell the other guests that he has made an effort to look good without trying to outshine the groom.

Frequently asked questions