Wedding Invitation Etiquette For Divorced Parents: A Guide

Wedding invitation wording can be a complex task, especially when dealing with divorced parents. The traditional format includes the names of both parents, but in the case of divorce, some adjustments are necessary. Here are some guidelines to help you navigate this delicate situation. Firstly, it's essential to list the mother's name first, followed by the father's name, and each on a separate line without using and to connect them. If either parent has remarried, you have the option to include their spouse's name as well. The key is to maintain respect and courtesy while conveying the necessary information clearly.

Divorced parents' names are written on separate lines with no 'and'

When addressing wedding invitations to guests, it is important to consider the role of the hosts and how they will be listed on the invitation. Traditionally, the bride's parents are listed as the hosts and are therefore named first. However, modern adaptations see the inclusion of the groom's parents, both sets of parents, or even the couple themselves as hosts.

When it comes to divorced parents, there are a few etiquette rules to consider:

• The mother's name is listed first, followed by the father's name on a separate line.
• There is no "and" between the names.
• Professional titles such as "Doctor" or "Captain" are included before the name, e.g., "Doctor Sarah Smith."
• If the mother has remarried, her new spouse's name is included, e.g., "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones."
• If the father has remarried, his new spouse is not included unless she has played an important role in the couple's life.
• If both parents have remarried, both spouses are included, e.g., "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones and Mr. and Mrs. John Smith."

Divorced Parents, Not Remarried:

Ms. Sarah Smith

Mr. John Smith

Request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Divorced Parents, Woman Kept Maiden Name:

Ms. Sarah Jones

Mr. John Smith

Request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Michael Alan Timmons

Divorced Parents, Woman Remarried:

Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

Mr. John Smith

Request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Michael Alan Timmons

Divorced Parents, Both Remarried:

Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

Request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Michael Alan Timmons

Remember, the key is to use separate lines for each parent or couple and omit the "and" between names. This way, you can navigate this delicate situation with grace and ensure your invitations are both proper and respectful.

The mother's name is listed first

When addressing wedding invitations, it's important to consider the role of the hosts and those financially contributing to the wedding. Traditionally, the bride's parents are listed as hosts and are named at the top of the invitation. However, modern variations include both the bride's and groom's parents, especially if both sets of parents are contributing financially.

When including divorced parents on a wedding invitation, the mother's name is typically listed first, followed by the father's name. Here are some examples:

Both Parents Remarried

If both parents have remarried, the invitation can be worded as follows:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Mother Remarried, Father Not

If your mother has remarried, and your father has not, the invitation can be worded as:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Both Parents Divorced, Not Remarried

If both of your parents are divorced and have not remarried, the invitation can simply include their names on separate lines:

> Ms. Sarah Smith

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Mother Not Remarried, Retained Married Name

If your mother has kept her married name, it is appropriate to include the bride's last name to prevent confusion:

> Ms. Sarah Smith

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Mother Not Remarried, Using Maiden Name

If your mother has returned to her maiden name, it is helpful to include the bride's last name for clarity:

> Ms. Sarah Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Remember, the key is to do what feels right for your unique family situation. You can always adapt the wording to fit your preferences and the style of your wedding invitation.

If the mother is not contributing financially, the father's name goes first

When it comes to wedding invitations, it's important to remember that every family is unique and you should do what feels right for your situation. That being said, here is some guidance on how to write divorced parents' names on wedding invitations when the mother is not contributing financially, and so the father's name goes first:

Traditional Etiquette

If you're following traditional wedding invitation etiquette, these are the rules to follow:

• Divorced parents' names never appear on the same line, even if they are both unmarried.
• The father's name goes first if he is the one contributing financially to the wedding.
• Only the parents' names appear on the invitation, but it is acceptable to include step-parents if desired.

Wording Examples

• "Mr. [Father's Name] and Ms. [Mother's Name] request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter [Bride's Name] to [Groom's Name], son of Mr. [Groom's Father's Name] and Mrs. [Groom's Mother's Name]."
• "Mr. [Father's Name] and Ms. [Mother's Name] invite you to the wedding of their daughter [Bride's Name] to [Groom's Name], son of Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's Parents' Names]."
• "Mr. [Father's First Name] and Mrs. [Father's Last Name] request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter [Bride's First and Middle Name] [Bride's Last Name] to [Groom's First and Middle Name] [Groom's Last Name], son of Mr. [Groom's Father's First Name] and Mrs. [Groom's Father's Last Name]."

Other Considerations

When addressing divorced parents on wedding invitations, it's important to remember the following:

• Avoid using the conjunction "and" between the mother and father's names, as this signifies marriage.
• Use "Ms." instead of "Mrs." for the mother's title if she is not remarried and is using her maiden name.
• If the father has remarried, include his new spouse's name on the same line as his, after the conjunction "and".
• If the mother has remarried, list her new married name followed by the father's name on separate lines.
• It is acceptable to list only the father's name on the invitation if he is the only one contributing financially and the mother has no involvement.

It's acceptable to include step-parents

It's natural to want to include all your parents on your wedding invitation, even if they are divorced, and this includes step-parents too. Here are some tips and guidelines to help you navigate this situation gracefully and ensure your invitation is both proper and inclusive:

Including step-parents on your wedding invitation is entirely acceptable and can be done in a few ways that convey both respect and unity. One traditional way to include step-parents is to list them on the invitation alongside your biological parents. For example, you could write, "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Mr. Robert Johnson request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their children, Jane Smith and John Doe." This format acknowledges both your biological parents and your step-parent, showing unity and respect for your blended family.

If you have a close relationship with your step-parent and want to give them a more prominent role on your wedding invitation, you can choose to list them as a separate host. This works especially well if your step-parent has played a significant role in your life and you want to honor their contribution. For example, the invitation could read, "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith, together with Mr. and Mrs. Robert Johnson, request the honor of your presence at the marriage of Jane Smith and John Doe." This phrasing includes both sets of parents and gives your step-parent equal importance.

Another option is to use a more general phrase to indicate that you have the support of all your parents, such as "Together with their families." This phrase is inclusive and conveys that you have the love and support of all your parents, step-parents, and extended families. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Mr. and Mrs. Robert Johnson, together with their families, invite you to share in the joy of the marriage of their children, Jane and John." This option is especially useful if you have complex family dynamics or if you want to simplify the wording while still including everyone.

When including step-parents, it's important to consider the level of formality you want to maintain. The traditional approach is to use titles and last names, as in the examples above. However, you can also choose to use first names or a combination of titles and first names, depending on your relationship and the tone you wish to set. For instance, "Jane Smith, daughter of Mr. John Smith and Mrs. Mary Parker, and step-son of Mr. Robert Johnson, together with Mr. Johnson's wife, Mrs. Emily Johnson, invite you to their wedding." This phrasing provides a more detailed explanation of your family structure while still maintaining a formal tone.

Remember, the most important thing is to honor your relationships and express your joy at having the support of your loved ones. Including step-parents on your wedding invitation is a wonderful way to showcase your blended family dynamics and set the tone for your special day. Choose the wording that feels most comfortable to you and reflects the unique dynamics of your family.

If the mother is remarried, her new last name is included to prevent confusion

When addressing wedding invitations to divorced parents, it is essential to be mindful of etiquette and sensitivity. Here are some guidelines and examples specifically for situations where the mother is remarried:

Mother Remarried, Father Not:

If your mother has remarried, her new last name should be included to prevent confusion, especially if your father is not remarried. This is how it could look:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

In this example, "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones" represents your mother and stepfather, with your mother's new last name included. "Mr. John Smith" represents your father, who has not remarried.

Both Parents Remarried:

If both your mother and father have remarried, you should include their new last names to avoid any confusion. Here's how you could word it:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

In this example, "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones" represents your mother and stepfather, while "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith" represents your father and stepmother.

Including Stepparents:

It is completely acceptable to include stepparents on the invitation if you wish to do so. If your mother is remarried and you want to include your stepfather, you can use the following format:

> Mother's Name & Stepdad's Name

> Invite you to the marriage of Mother's Name daughter

> Bride's Name

> on Wedding Date

> at Time of Ceremony

> Wedding Venue Address

For instance:

> Michelle & Timothy Wright

> Invite you to the marriage of Michelle's daughter

> Elizabeth Ann Monroe

> on Saturday, the twenty-sixth of June

> at one o'clock in the afternoon

> 777 East Grand Avenue, Prairie Fields, Iowa

Keeping the Peace:

When addressing divorced parents on wedding invitations, it is essential to maintain sensitivity and respect for everyone involved. Here are some additional tips to keep in mind:

• Speak with your parents and ask for their input on how they would like to be addressed.
• Avoid having divorced parents on the same line, even if they are not remarried, and list them on separate lines without an "and" between them.
• Traditionally, the mother's name goes first, but if the father is contributing financially, you may opt to list his name first.
• If your stepfather has played an important role in your life, you can include his name on the same line as your mother's.

Frequently asked questions