Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a big responsibility: the best man's speech. This speech is one of the highlights of the wedding, and while it's just 5-10 minutes, it will be remembered forever. Here are some tips to help you write and deliver a great best man's speech that will leave a lasting impression.
First, prepare your speech in advance. While it's tempting to wing it, a well-prepared speech will be more concise, funny, and to the point. Keep it short, ideally under 5 minutes, as that's the maximum attention span for guests. Start with an introduction: mention who you are and how you know the groom. Share some stories or anecdotes about the groom, highlighting his positive qualities and any memorable moments you've shared. Make sure to include the bride in your speech, talking about the positive impact she's had on the groom. Avoid any inappropriate jokes or stories that might embarrass the couple or their families. Finally, conclude with a toast to the couple, wishing them a happy and loving future together.
Remember, the key to a great best man's speech is to be sincere, keep it light-hearted, and focus on celebrating the couple and their relationship. Good luck!
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Length | 3-10 minutes |
Content | Introduction, stories/anecdotes, compliment the couple, well wishes |
Preparation | Write it down, practice, be sober |
Delivery | Be yourself, be confident, be tactful |
What You'll Learn
Keep it short and sweet
As the best man, your wedding speech is one of the most important toasts of the day. It's an honour to be chosen, but it can also be a little daunting. Here are some tips to help you keep your speech short and sweet while still making it memorable.
Firstly, aim for a duration of around 5 minutes. This may not seem like a lot of time, but it's ample for a wedding speech. Any shorter and you may rush through your words, and any longer could lead to losing the attention of your audience. A well-crafted 5-minute speech will have a beginning, middle, and end, with a clear structure that keeps guests engaged.
Keep the content concise and to the point. Focus on sharing one or two fond memories or anecdotes about the groom, and perhaps one light-hearted story about the couple. Avoid rambling or trying to include every detail of your friendship. Opt for quality over quantity when it comes to your stories and jokes.
Ensure your speech has a clear structure. Start with an introduction that includes a brief overview of who you are and your relationship to the groom. Then, move on to your main points, whether they are stories, jokes, or words of wisdom. Finally, wrap up your speech with a heartfelt toast to the happy couple.
Practise your speech beforehand to ensure it falls within the desired time frame. Time yourself while rehearsing to get a feel for the pacing. Practising will also help you refine your delivery, ensuring your speech is well-received and understood by the audience.
Remember, a short and sweet speech is always better than one that drags on. Your concise and well-crafted words will be appreciated by the guests and the happy couple.
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Include the bride in your stories
Including the bride in your stories is a great way to make your best man speech more engaging and meaningful. Here are some tips and ideas to help you craft a memorable speech that includes the bride:
Share Embarrassing (But Endearing) Stories
Sharing light-hearted and funny anecdotes about the bride will not only showcase her incredible qualities but also add a personal touch to your speech. These stories can be about a time when the bride went out of her way to help someone or a hilarious incident that reflects her fun-loving personality. For example, you could share a story about how the bride organised a surprise birthday party for the groom, going to great lengths to keep him distracted while setting everything up.
Compliment Her Stunning Appearance
It is essential to compliment the bride on her wedding day. Even if you don't know much about fashion or makeup, you can simply speak from the heart and express how breathtaking she looks. You could say something like, "When [Bride] walked down the aisle, the whole room gasped. She looks absolutely stunning, and I don't know how you managed to keep your cool, [Groom]!".
Highlight Her Amazing Qualities
Think about the bride's unique qualities and use specific examples to illustrate them. Is she kind, always ready to lend a helping hand? Does she have a great sense of humour that can turn any boring story into a hilarious one? Sharing these qualities will not only make the bride feel special but also show how well you know and appreciate her.
Give a Shout-Out to Her Family
Acknowledging the bride's family, especially her parents, is a thoughtful gesture that will earn you bonus points. Share a funny or heartfelt story about them, such as a camping trip with the bride's parents that turned into a hilarious adventure. This will show your appreciation for the people who have been there for the bride and will also win you some brownie points with the in-laws!
Balance Humour and Sincerity
While it's important to make your speech funny and light-hearted, don't forget to include sincere sentiments as well. Begin and end your speech with genuine expressions of appreciation for the bride. Intersperse these heartfelt moments with funny stories or anecdotes to strike the perfect balance between humour and sincerity.
Remember, when including the bride in your stories, always keep your content classy and appropriate for all ages. Avoid inside jokes that may alienate some guests, and steer clear of any embarrassing secrets or references to the groom's ex-girlfriends!
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Avoid inside jokes
As tempting as it may be to share an inside joke with the groom, it's important to remember that not everyone will understand it. To ensure your speech is inclusive and engaging for all, it's best to avoid inside jokes and personal anecdotes that only you and the groom will find funny. Here are some tips to help you navigate this:
- Universality: When crafting your speech, opt for stories and jokes that are relatable and universal. For example, you could talk about the groom's klutzy injury or how he was embarrassingly aflutter in the early days of meeting his significant other. These experiences are likely to be shared by many in the audience, making your speech more accessible and entertaining for all.
- Contextualisation: If you do choose to share a story from your past with the groom, provide context to make it relatable. Point out characters in the story who are present at the wedding and use your words and gestures to paint a vivid picture. This will help your audience connect with the story and create a sense of inclusivity.
- Avoid Excessive Embarrassment: While light-hearted teasing is acceptable, avoid stories that may cause excessive embarrassment for the groom, his new spouse, or other guests. Remember, the goal is to create a joyous and carefree atmosphere, not an uncomfortable one.
- Inclusivity: Keep in mind that your speech should be inclusive and engaging for all guests, not just those who share your sense of humour or inside jokes with the groom. Opt for stories and jokes that will resonate with a wider audience.
- Broad Appeal: When in doubt, stick to topics that have broad appeal. You can joke about the groom's obsession with sports, his receding hairline, or his tendency to never buy a round of drinks. These topics are likely to be relatable for many guests and will help you connect with the audience.
- Self-Deprecation: If you're unsure about offending the groom or the guests, a safe approach is to use self-deprecating humour. This type of humour is often well-received and allows you to poke fun at yourself without risking offence.
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Be yourself
Being yourself is one of the most important things to keep in mind when writing and delivering a best man speech. It can be tempting to put on a performance or adopt a character, especially if you're nervous about public speaking. But it's crucial that you stay true to who you are and how you would normally act around your friends. The couple already knows and loves your personality, so the more genuine you are, the better your speech will be received.
- Don't feel pressured to be a comedian: While it's great to include some humour in your speech, don't feel like you have to be the funny man. If comedy doesn't come naturally to you, focus on delivering a sincere and heartfelt speech instead. Sprinkle in a few jokes or light-hearted moments, but don't make them the main focus unless you're comfortable with it. Remember, it's okay if not every line gets a laugh.
- Share personal stories: One of the best ways to be yourself is to share personal stories and anecdotes about your relationship with the groom. Talk about how you met, fun experiences you've had together, or how he has changed your life. These stories will not only showcase your unique bond but also add a touch of sentimentality to your speech.
- Be vulnerable: It's okay to show your emotions during your speech. If you're feeling nervous, acknowledge it, but don't let it consume your entire speech. A little vulnerability can go a long way in connecting with the audience and showing your true self.
- Avoid inside jokes: While it's tempting to include inside jokes that only you and the groom understand, resist the urge. Instead, focus on stories and anecdotes that most people can relate to. You want to include the entire audience in your speech, not just the groom.
- Stay away from controversial topics: When being yourself, be mindful of what you say. Avoid controversial topics, offensive jokes, or anything that might embarrass the bride or groom. Keep your speech positive, respectful, and appropriate for all ages.
- Practice, but don't over-rehearse: Practising your speech beforehand is essential, but don't memorise it word for word. You want to sound natural and conversational, not like you're reciting a script. Practise in front of a mirror, record yourself, or speak to a trusted friend to get feedback.
- Use your natural voice and mannerisms: Speak with your natural voice and use hand gestures if that's what you normally do. Stand up straight, make eye contact, and smile. These non-verbal cues will help you appear more confident and engaging, allowing your true self to shine through.
- Keep it short and sweet: A long-winded speech can make it challenging to stay true to yourself. Aim for a speech that is concise and focused. This will help you stay on track and ensure that your genuine self shines through.
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Practice your delivery
Rehearse your speech
Practice makes perfect. Rehearse your speech multiple times before the big day. Try practising in front of a mirror, to trusted friends, or even record yourself making the speech to watch back. This will help you feel more comfortable, ensure a smooth delivery, and help you remember the key points you want to cover. If you’re still feeling anxious, consider signing up for a speech delivery course to help you prepare for your best man’s speech.
Respect boundaries
Avoid sensitive or controversial topics that could offend or upset anyone in attendance. Some light-hearted roasting is appropriate, but stay away from any stories that may embarrass the couple or make them uncomfortable. If in doubt, check with the groom what stories he’s happy for you to use and disclose beforehand. This way, you can make sure he’s comfortable with the stories you’ll share while keeping your speech’s content a secret.
Toasting etiquette
When raising a toast, ensure your glass is filled with the drink of your choice beforehand. This is traditionally champagne, but prosecco or a non-alcoholic fizzy drink is also acceptable. Make eye contact with the couple and raise your glass towards them. Encourage others to join in by signalling or making a simple gesture.
Keep it short and sweet
Your speech should be about 5 minutes long. Any longer and you risk losing the audience’s attention or delaying dinner. If you have a lot of content, ruthlessly edit it down to the essentials. It’s always better to leave them wanting more.
Be yourself
If you usually don’t joke and you try to crack jokes, it’s just unfunny and superficial, and people won’t buy it. Be true to yourself and your speech will be a good one.
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Frequently asked questions
A best man speech should be concise and to the point, lasting no longer than 10 minutes in the UK and around 5 minutes in the US.
A best man speech should include an introduction, anecdotes about the groom, a mention of the bride and how the couple met, and a toast to the couple's future.
Avoid making inappropriate jokes, sharing embarrassing stories, or talking about the groom's exes. Keep the speech positive and focus on the couple's relationship.
Write your speech in advance, practice in front of a mirror or with friends, and time yourself to ensure it doesn't exceed the recommended length.