Best Man Speech: Mean Or Nice?

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. One of the most important tasks is delivering a memorable speech that celebrates the groom, entertains the guests, and shows your support for the happy couple. A great best man speech requires careful planning, personal touches, and confident delivery.

The best man speech is an important part of the wedding reception. While the maid of honour's speech tends to be more emotional, the best man's speech is usually funnier. It's a chance to show your relationship with the groom and for others to learn more about him. A great toast can be an emotional moment for the couple and the guests.

So, does the best man speech have to be mean? Absolutely not. In fact, it shouldn't be. While it's fine to poke fun at the groom, the focus should be on celebrating the couple and their love. The speech should be lighthearted and positive, with any jokes being good-natured and not at the couple's expense. It's also important to avoid anything that could be considered offensive or embarrassing, such as sex jokes or references to drugs and alcohol.

The best man speech is about the couple, so it's important to include a special shout-out to the new spouse and share why you think they're a great match. You can also talk about how they first met and how their relationship has grown.

The ideal length for a best man speech is usually between 3 and 7 minutes. This gives you enough time to share a few meaningful stories and insights without losing the attention of your audience.

So, if you've been chosen as the best man, don't stress! Just focus on celebrating the couple, adding personal touches, and practicing your delivery. With these tips, you'll be well on your way to giving a memorable and heartfelt speech that the couple will cherish.

How to start a best man speech

So, you've been asked to be the best man at a wedding and now you need to write your speech. The best man's speech is usually the highlight of the wedding reception, so it's important to get it right. Here are some tips on how to start your speech and make it memorable.

Know Your Role

Yes, your main task is to give a speech, but as the best man, you also have other responsibilities, such as organising the stag do and safeguarding the rings. Keep in mind that the wedding guests won't remember these things—they'll remember your speech.

Understand the Speech Structure

The best man's speech usually comes last, after the father of the bride and the groom. It typically includes an introduction, messages from absent friends and family, anecdotes about the groom, words of wisdom, praises for the partner, acknowledgement of the bridal party, and a final toast.

Break the Ice

Kick things off with a light-hearted joke or icebreaker. This will warm up the guests and calm your nerves. It will also set a friendly tone for the rest of your speech. You could make a joke about your unpreparedness or the groom's speech. However, avoid overused best man jokes.

Introduce Yourself

After your opening line, introduce yourself. Share how you met the groom to establish your connection with everyone in the room, especially those who may not know you well. You could also add a humorous twist to your introduction by exaggerating your relationship with the groom.

Share a Story

Share amusing anecdotes and stories about the groom. This is the key section of your speech. Take the audience on a journey of your friendship and give an overview of who the groom is as a person. Include childhood stories, silly reasons they ended up in detention, or how they always stuck up for you against bullies. You could also use props such as a slideshow of photos or a theme related to the groom's interests.

Keep it Balanced

A best man speech should balance humour with sincerity. Alternate between moments of laughter and meaning. Get the audience laughing, then get them saying "aww". Make sure your jokes are original and tasteful, and that they ultimately come from a place of love for your friend.

Be Yourself

Stick to your authentic self when giving the speech. If you're not usually the comedian in the group, don't try to force a bunch of jokes into your speech. Keep things lighthearted if sentimentality isn't your style. The couple already knows and loves your personality, so be genuine, and your speech will be well-received.

How to end a best man speech

So, you've been asked to be the best man at a wedding, and now you need to write your speech. Don't panic! Here's a step-by-step guide to help you craft a memorable and meaningful best man speech that will leave the newlyweds and guests smiling, laughing, and maybe even shedding a few happy tears.

Step 1: Introduction and Icebreaker

Kick off your speech with a light-hearted joke or icebreaker to warm up the guests and calm your nerves. You could make a joke about the groom's speech or appearance, or even your own unpreparedness. Just make sure to avoid overdone best man jokes that will fall flat. Remember, the key is to be original and engaging.

Step 2: Introduce Yourself

Let the guests know who you are, especially those who might not know you well. Share how you met the groom and how long you've known each other. If there's a humorous tale or a funny first impression, now is the time to share it!

Step 3: Messages from Absent Guests

The couple may ask you to share messages or well-wishes from friends and family who couldn't attend the wedding. You can make this part more light-hearted by including some fake messages or jokes.

Step 4: Storytime and Anecdotes

This is the heart of your speech, where you share amusing anecdotes and stories about the groom and the newlyweds. Keep it friendly and respectful, and feel free to include a prop or stunt if it enhances your story. If you're feeling nervous, you can use photos, slideshows, or themes to help illustrate your stories. Just remember to always get the couple's permission before sharing any potentially embarrassing stories!

Step 5: Words of Wisdom

Share some light-hearted yet sincere advice for the newlyweds. If you're married, you can offer your own golden rules for a happy marriage. Alternatively, ask friends, family, or even the couple's parents or grandparents for their tips on love, compromise, and everyday living.

Step 6: Compliment the Couple

Take a moment to compliment the newlyweds and reflect on their relationship. Share a memory of when you knew they were meant to be together or highlight the positive impact they've had on each other's lives.

Step 7: Acknowledge the Bridal Party

Thank the bridesmaids for their role on the day and in the lead-up to the wedding.

Step 8: Final Toast and Well-Wishes

Conclude your speech by raising a glass to the couple and wishing them a future filled with happiness. You can also include a personalised quote or a meaningful quote about love and marriage to leave a lasting impression.

Remember, the key to a great best man speech is to focus on the couple, especially the groom, and share stories and anecdotes that celebrate their relationship. Keep it light, positive, and succinct, and most importantly, be yourself! With a little preparation and practice, you'll deliver a speech that the newlyweds and guests will remember for years to come.

Best man speech examples

The best man's speech is a chance to say kind words about your relationship with the couple and your best friend. It should be quick, lighthearted, and strike a balance between humorous memories and thoughtful anecdotes. Here are some examples to inspire your own unique speech:

The Gaming Enthusiast's Speech

> Ladies and gentlemen, for those who don’t know me, I’m Mike, and I’ve known [Groom] since we were fighting over the Nintendo controller in primary school. Back then, his idea of a perfect match was beating the final boss in Mario. Now he’s found his perfect Player 2 in [Bride].

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> I’ve watched [Groom]’s character development over the years – from someone who thought “commitment” meant pre-ordering a game to someone who plans date nights and remembers anniversaries. Though I notice he still uses “just one more level” as an excuse for being late.

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> Their love story is like the perfect gameplay. The tutorial phase: awkward first dates and learning each other’s controls. The main quest: moving in together and discovering that “clean” means more than just pushing everything under the bed. And now they’ve reached the boss level: marriage.

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> [Bride], you’ve achieved what no game guide could – you’ve got him to put down his controller without having to cut the power. You’re the cheat code he needed to win at life, and I’ve never seen him happier.

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> To the happy couple: may your marriage have unlimited lives, no game overs, and plenty of save points along the way. And remember, like any good game, communication is key – especially when one of you has the map and the other’s too stubborn to ask for directions.

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> Please raise your glasses to the newest co-op team in town!

The Sports Fan's Toast

> Good evening everyone! I’m Chris, and like any good sports commentator, I’m here to give you the play-by-play of [Groom]’s journey to this moment. I’ve known him since university, when his idea of a perfect match was finding someone who could handle his fantasy football obsession.

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> [Groom] approached dating like he approaches his beloved team – with blind optimism and questionable strategy. His chat-up lines were about as successful as our team’s defense, which isn’t saying much. But then, like a surprise victory in extra time, [Bride] came along.

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> Their first date was like watching a rookie’s debut match – plenty of nerves, a few fumbles, but ultimately a game-changing performance. He was so nervous, he actually wore a tie – though we later found out it was technically a Christmas decoration.

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> [Bride], you’ve achieved what no coach could – you’ve got him to follow directions, stick to a game plan, and occasionally wear matching socks. You’ve even got him watching rom-coms without checking the sports scores every five minutes. Though I notice he still sneaks a peek during the emotional monologues.

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> To the newlyweds: may your marriage be like your favorite team – resilient through the tough matches, celebrating the victories together, and always playing on the same side. Let’s raise our glasses to the ultimate dream team!

The Lifelong Friendship Tribute

> Ladies and gentlemen, when I think about my friendship with [Groom], I’m reminded of all the moments that have led us here. From building blanket forts in primary school to helping each other through life’s challenges, he’s been more than a friend – he’s been my brother.

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> I remember the day [Groom] called me about meeting [Bride]. There was something different in his voice – a kind of excitement I’d never heard before. He said, “I’ve met someone special,” and for once, he wasn’t talking about a new PlayStation game.

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> Watching their love story unfold has been like watching your favorite book come to life. Every chapter has been better than the last. [Bride], you’ve brought out the best in him. You’ve taken my best friend – someone who once tried to cure a cold with pizza and energy drinks – and helped him become the man standing before us today.

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> [Groom], you’ve been there for every important moment in my life. Today, I get to stand here and celebrate the most important moment in yours. Your happiness means the world to me, and seeing you with [Bride] makes my heart full.

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> To the happy couple: may your love continue to grow deeper with each passing day. May you always find reasons to laugh together, dream together, and cherish each other. Here’s to a lifetime of beautiful moments.

The Coming of Age Story

> Good evening everyone. They say true friendship is like a fine wine – it gets better with age. Well, I’ve known [Groom] since we were both grape juice, and I can confirm this theory is accurate.

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> I’ve watched him grow from a carefree boy who thought microwaving anything made it “cooking,” to a man who now owns actual kitchen utensils – even if he’s still not entirely sure what all of them do. But the real transformation began when he met [Bride].

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> It’s been incredible watching their relationship blossom. [Bride] brought grace to his chaos, direction to his wandering, and love to his life in a way that has transformed him completely. She accepts his quirks, celebrates his successes, and supports his dreams – even the questionable ones involving that garage band.

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> [Groom], you’ve been my best friend through every up and down. You’ve been there for late-night talks, emergency pizza runs, and countless adventures. Seeing you this happy, seeing you loved this completely by someone as wonderful as [Bride], fills me with more joy than I can express.

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> To my best friend and his beautiful bride: may your love story continue to be an inspiration. May you face every challenge together, celebrate every victory as one, and always remember the love that brought you here today.

The Classic Gentleman's Toast

> Distinguished guests, family, and friends, it is my great honor to stand before you today as [Groom]’s best man. As tradition dictates, I’m here to sing his praises, share a few carefully selected stories, and raise a toast to the happy couple.

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> I first met [Groom] fifteen years ago at university, where his impeccable character and steadfast friendship quickly became apparent. Though I must say, his ability to sleep through morning lectures was equally impressive. However, it wasn’t until he met [Bride] that I saw him truly flourish.

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> [Bride], you have brought out the very best in him. Where once stood a young man who considered cereal a proper dinner, now stands a gentleman who makes dinner reservations – and occasionally even remembers to keep them. Your grace, kindness, and patience have transformed him in the most remarkable ways.

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> To my dear friend: you have been a brother to me through the years. Your loyalty, integrity, and friendship have enriched my life immeasurably. Today, as

Best man speech tips

Being asked to be the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it's also a role that comes with a lot of responsibility. One of your main tasks will be to deliver a memorable and meaningful speech that celebrates the groom, entertains the guests, and shows your support for the happy couple. Here are some tips to help you craft and deliver an excellent best man speech.

Planning and Preparation

• Start writing your speech at least two months before the wedding. The closer the wedding gets, the more distracted you'll be with other events and preparations.
• Use a template as a helpful starting point. Most people have never written a best man speech before, so it's normal to feel unsure about where to begin.
• Write down all your thoughts, feelings, memories, stories, jokes and quotes. You know the groom well, but you might not remember everything at first. Free writing can help get your ideas flowing.
• Keep it simple and form a logical progression from one piece to the next. Don't let the timeline jump around, and don't confuse the audience.
• Practice your speech multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing and flow. Practising in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend can help refine your delivery.
• Practise speaking slowly and confidently. Nerves can make you speak too fast, mumble or use filler words like "um".
• Use small note cards instead of a sheet of paper to refer to during your speech. They won't flap around or make a noise when you put them down.

Content

• Begin with a light-hearted icebreaker or a well-chosen joke. This will warm up the guests and calm your nerves.
• Introduce yourself and explain your connection to the couple. Share a humorous tale about your first encounter or how you became friends.
• Thank the previous speaker and the couple's parents.
• Give a special shout-out to the groom's new spouse. Talk about the qualities you admire about them and why you're happy they're in the groom's life.
• Share one or two personal, funny, heartwarming or embarrassing anecdotes about the groom. Avoid rambling stories with no sentimental or funny ending. Keep it lighthearted and short.
• Speak about why the couple is a great match. Share how they first met and how their relationship has grown.
• Close with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes for the newlyweds.

What to Avoid

• Negativity about marriage or previous marriages/divorces.
• References to drinking, drugs or gambling.
• Adult humour or any mention of sex.
• Inside jokes that most guests won't understand.
• Reading your speech off your phone. The lighting from your screen can ruin the wedding photographer's photos.
• Speaking for too long. Aim for a maximum of 7-10 minutes.

Delivery

• Don't mumble. Speak clearly and confidently, and use hand gestures.
• Maintain eye contact with the guests.
• Connect with the audience. Make them feel included, e.g. by posing a question to them.
• Don't be afraid to show your emotions. It's an emotional occasion.
• Take deep breaths to calm your nerves.
• Imagine you're telling a story to a group of friends. It might help you relax and be yourself.

Example Opening Lines

"Good evening, if you’re in this room and don’t know me by now, then you’re probably at the wrong wedding. I am, of course, [your name], and I’ve been best friends with [groom] for 25 years…"

"Hello and welcome to tonight’s reception. [name of groom], YOU truly are MY biggest fan. Wait, that didn’t come out right…"

"Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous."

Best man speech length

The best man's speech is one of the highlights of any wedding, but it's important to get it right. While there's an expectation for the best man to be funny, the speech should ultimately be meaningful and non-clichéd.

The ideal length for a best man's speech is around seven minutes. This is enough time for a well-planned and well-rehearsed speech that won't lose the attention of the room. Any longer, and people may start to switch off. If there are multiple speakers, the best man's speech should be shorter, at around 6-8 minutes.

If you're giving a best man's speech, you don't need to put pressure on yourself to be groundbreaking, novel or unique. Tell a short, uplifting or heartwarming story about the couple, and wish them well at the end.

Frequently asked questions