Texting Your Rsvp: Guide To Accepting Wedding Invites

Receiving a wedding invitation is always exciting, but it also comes with certain expectations and etiquette. One of the first duties of a wedding guest is to respond promptly to the invitation, confirming attendance or non-attendance. This is usually done through an RSVP card, but sometimes a digital response is requested. When responding, it's important to follow the instructions provided and maintain a level of formality that matches the invitation. This could be a formal response in the third person or a more informal personal note, depending on your relationship with the couple. It's also courteous to let the couple know if you can no longer attend after previously accepting.

Respond promptly

Responding promptly to a wedding invitation is one of the first duties of a wedding guest. It is important to respond as soon as possible, even before the due date, to avoid being chased down with reminders. Prompt responses help the couple finalise their numbers, create a seating plan, and confirm their budget. It also gives them time to invite someone else if you can't make it.

If you've been invited with children, check the invitation carefully to see if the wedding is child-free. If it is, don't ask for an exception unless you have a newborn, in which case the couple will likely be understanding.

If you've been offered a plus one, your invitation will include the words "and Guest" or "+1". If your invitation doesn't include these words, don't ask the couple if you can bring a guest. Due to budget and venue restrictions, it may not be viable to offer plus ones to single guests. However, if your long-term partner or spouse is missing from the invitation, it's okay to send a polite text to clarify.

If you're not sure whether you can attend, hold off on responding until you can confirm. Keep the couple in the loop, and respond as soon as you know.

If you can't attend after accepting the invitation, call the couple immediately. They will need to inform the caterer and may invite someone else.

Follow the RSVP card instructions

When responding to an RSVP card, it's important to follow the couple's instructions to ensure your seat at the wedding. Here are some detailed guidelines on how to "Follow the RSVP card instructions":

Respond Promptly

It is considered good etiquette to respond to a wedding invitation as soon as possible. It is recommended to take no longer than a full weekend to make your plans and respond. The couple will appreciate a prompt response as it helps them finalise their catering count, create a seating chart, and address place cards accurately. Remember, the RSVP deadline is there for a reason!

Include Your Full Name(s)

When filling out the RSVP card, always include your full name and the names of any additional guests. This is important for the couple when creating seating charts and place cards. If there is only a first letter "M" next to the blank line, write your correct honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss) followed by your full name. If the line is blank, write out your full, preferred name, including the honorific.

Indicate Your Response (Attending or Not Attending)

Clearly indicate whether you are accepting or declining the invitation. This is typically done by checking a box or filling in a blank line. If you are accepting, specify the number of guests who will be attending, including yourself. It is important to commit to your plus-one at this stage and provide their full name if requested.

Provide Additional Information

The RSVP card may request additional information such as meal preferences or dietary restrictions. If entree selection is requested, initial your choice next to each meal option. Be sure to disclose any serious allergies by contacting the couple or caterer directly. You may also be asked to answer fun questions or share a note with the couple.

Follow the Specified Format

RSVP cards can vary in format, ranging from pre-printed response cards to free-form styles. Respect the couple's chosen format and provide the requested information. If a paper response card is included, use it to let the hosts know your decision. If no response card is provided, look for details on how to RSVP, such as a wedding website or email address.

Send Your Response Back Promptly

Once you've filled out the RSVP card, send it back as soon as possible. Don't wait until the last day to respond. The couple will appreciate receiving your response early as it helps them finalise their wedding plans with plenty of time to spare.

Include full names

When responding to a wedding invitation, it is important to include your full name. This is true whether you are accepting or declining the invitation.

If you are responding to a formal invitation, your reply should be formal and cordial. Here are some examples of how to include your full name in your response:

• "Mr. and Mrs. Harold McGowan accept with pleasure (or regret that they are unable to accept) your kind invitation for Saturday, the nineteenth of June."
• "Dear Ann and John, Rob and I are delighted to accept your invitation to attend Margaret and Tom’s wedding on June nineteenth. Yours sincerely, Brittany."
• "Dear Agatha, I am so sorry that I can’t join you and Max for your wedding. I have to be in Chicago on business, but you two will be first in my thoughts on your special day. Love to you both, Dottie."

If the invitation is informal, your response can be less formal while still maintaining a courteous tone. Here is an example:

"I am pleased to accept your invitation. Please let me know if I can bring something. Sincerely, [Your Full Name]"

It is also important to include the full names of the couple getting married on the wedding invitation itself. This is true regardless of whether the invitation is formal or informal. Here are some examples of how to include the couple's full names on the invitation:

• "The honor of your presence is requested at the marriage of Jack Alexander Smith to Mason Jacob Kim..."
• "Together with their families: Olivia Rose Smith and John Michael Reyes together with their parents Kenzie M. Smith and Jennifer L. Smith and Mark Franklin and Mary Elizabeth Reyes request the honor of your presence at their wedding..."
• "Jack Alexander Smith & Mason Jacob Kim invite you to share in their joy at their wedding..."

Specify number of guests

When accepting a wedding invitation, it is important to specify the number of guests who will be attending. This is crucial for the couple's planning, as it helps them finalise numbers for the caterer and seating arrangements. Here are some tips on how to do this effectively:

Firstly, if you have been given a plus-one, now is the time to confirm whether you will be bringing a guest. Indicate the number of people in your party and provide their full name(s). This is important for the couple to finalise seating charts and place cards.

If you are inviting children, it is essential to mention this clearly on the RSVP. You can simply write the number of children attending, or you can include their names if you prefer. Some couples may choose to specify whether children are invited, so be sure to respect their wishes.

A useful tip to avoid confusion is to use multiple methods to indicate the number of guests. You can include this information on the envelope, invitation card, and RSVP card. For example, on the envelope, write the names of the invited guests, specifying whether the entire family or adults only are invited. On the invitation card, mention if children are welcome, and on the RSVP card, you can include the number of reserved seats.

Another option is to use a statement such as: "___ of ___ attending." You would fill in the second blank space with the number of people invited, and the couple cannot bring more than that number.

It is always a good idea to send back the RSVP card as soon as possible. Finalise your plans and return the card promptly to help the couple with their planning.

Remember, the couple is relying on your timely response to finalise their guest list and make the necessary arrangements. So, be considerate and provide clear information about the number of guests attending.

Add dietary restrictions

When responding to a wedding invitation, it is important to indicate any dietary restrictions or allergies. This allows the couple to accommodate your needs and ensures that you don't go hungry at the wedding. Here are some tips on how to gracefully communicate your dietary restrictions when accepting a wedding invitation by text:

• Be Clear and Specific: Clearly state your dietary restrictions or allergies. For example, "I am a vegetarian" or "I have a gluten allergy." This helps the couple understand your needs and communicate them to the caterer.
• Provide Details: If you have multiple dietary restrictions or allergies, consider providing a detailed list. You can also mention specific ingredients or dishes that you need to avoid. For example, "I follow a vegan diet, so I don't consume any animal products, including meat, dairy, and eggs."
• Offer Alternative Options: If you are familiar with the menu options, you can suggest alternative dishes that align with your dietary needs. This can be helpful for the couple when coordinating with the caterer. For example, "I noticed that one of the options is pasta. I would be happy to enjoy a vegan or gluten-free pasta dish."
• Communicate Any Severity: If your dietary restriction is related to a severe allergy or medical condition, be sure to mention it. This helps the couple and caterer understand the importance of accommodating your needs. For example, "I have a severe nut allergy, so please ensure that my meal is completely free of nuts."
• Respond Promptly: It is important to respond to the invitation promptly, especially when you have dietary restrictions. This gives the couple ample time to make the necessary arrangements.
• Direct Communication: If you have extensive or complex dietary restrictions, consider contacting the couple directly instead of relying solely on the text response. This allows you to provide detailed information and ensures that your needs are clearly understood.
• Offer to Bring Your Own Food: If you are unsure about the menu options or feel that your dietary needs may be challenging to accommodate, you can politely offer to bring your own food. This takes the burden off the couple and ensures that you have a suitable meal.

"Thank you so much for the invitation! I am thrilled to celebrate your special day with you. I wanted to let you know that I follow a gluten-free diet due to a medical condition. Please let me know if there will be gluten-free options available, or if you would like me to bring my own meal. Looking forward to the wedding!"

Remember to adapt the tone and wording to match the formality of the wedding and your relationship with the couple. If you have any questions or concerns, don't hesitate to reach out to the couple directly for further clarification.

Frequently asked questions