Invitation Wording Etiquette When Parents Have Passed Away

When it comes to wedding invitations, there are many ways to honour a deceased parent. While some believe that only the hosts of the wedding should be listed on the invite, others feel that it is important to include the names of both parents, regardless of whether they have passed away. One way to do this is to use wording such as [Groom's name], son of Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's parents' names], and the late [father/mother]. Alternatively, you could use a more traditional phrasing: The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of [Bride], daughter of [Bride's parents' names] to [Groom], son of Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's mother's name] and the late [Groom's father's name]. If you would prefer not to include the groom's parents' names on the invitation, there are other ways to honour a deceased parent, such as lighting a candle for them or playing their favourite song.

Including groom's deceased parent's name in the invitation

Including the groom's deceased parent's name in a wedding invitation can be a thoughtful way to honour their memory on your special day. Here are some suggestions for how to phrase the invitation:

Traditional Wording

A traditional wedding invitation typically includes the names of the bride's parents as the hosts, followed by the names of the groom's parents. If the groom's parent is deceased, you can modify the wording as follows:

> The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's parents' names]

> to [Groom's name], son of [Groom's mother's name] and the late [Groom's father's name]

For example:

> The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of Jennifer Drake, daughter of John Drake and the late Barbara Drake, to Brian Connors, son of Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Connors.

Modern Wording

If you prefer a more modern approach, the invitation can be issued by both the bride and groom, along with their families. Here's an example of how to include the groom's deceased parent:

> Together with their families, [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's parents' names], and [Groom's name], son of [Groom's mother's name] and the late [Groom's father's name], request the honour of your presence at their marriage.

For instance:

> Together with their families, Jennifer Drake, daughter of John Drake and the late Barbara Drake, and Brian Connors, son of Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Connors, request the honour of your presence at their marriage.

Honouring the Deceased Parent

Remember, there are other ways to honour a deceased parent during your wedding if you don't feel comfortable including their name on the invitation. You can incorporate their memory through a tribute in the wedding program, a meaningful poem or reading, a special song, or even a candle lighting.

Wording the invitation when the bride's parent is also deceased

When the bride's parent is deceased, there are a few ways to word the wedding invitation. Here are some examples:

Including the bride's deceased parent:

If you want to include the bride's deceased parent, you can use wording similar to the following examples:

> Together with their families, [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's mother's name] and the late [Bride's father's name], and [Groom's name], son of [Groom's parents' names], request the honour of your presence at their marriage...

> The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's mother's name] and the late [Bride's father's name], to [Groom's name], son of [Groom's parents' names]...

Not including the bride's deceased parent:

If you prefer not to include the bride's deceased parent, you can use wording that focuses on the groom's parents or other family members:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's parents' names] request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their son [Groom's name] to [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's mother's name]...

> [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's mother's name], and [Groom's name], son of Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's parents' names], together with their families, invite you to share in the joy of their wedding...

Informal wording:

If you prefer a less formal approach, you can use wording such as:

> [Bride's name] and [Groom's name], together with their families, invite you to celebrate their marriage...

> The pleasure of your company is requested at the wedding celebration of [Bride's name], daughter of [Bride's mother's name] and the late [Bride's father's name], and [Groom's name], son of [Groom's parents' names]...

Remember, the most important thing is to follow your heart and honour your loved ones in a way that feels right for you. You can also consider including tributes to the deceased parent during the wedding ceremony or reception, such as a memorial table, a favourite poem or song, or a special mention in the wedding program.

Honouring the deceased parent in other ways

Honouring a deceased parent or loved one at a wedding is a thoughtful way to remember someone who cannot be there to celebrate with you. Here are some ideas for honouring the deceased parent in ways other than the wedding invitation:

During Wedding Speeches

• Read a memorial poem during your wedding speech. You can choose a classic poem, a modern poem, or even write one yourself.
• Offer a toast on behalf of your loved one. You could even toast with their favourite drink.
• Read a letter from your loved one, or write a letter to them, explaining what their love meant to you and why you want them to be part of your wedding day.
• Hold a time of silence to quietly reflect on your own, with your partner, or with your guests.
• Say a prayer or share a meaningful quote or lyric.

During the Ceremony

• Leave a chair open at the ceremony to represent their presence and that their memory will be with you.
• Light a memorial candle to symbolise unity and that their spirit is with you.
• Write a message in the wedding programme, such as a short tribute, a poem, a quote, or religious passage.
• Carry a memento with you, such as their cufflinks, a handkerchief, or an heirloom necklace.
• Speak to the officiant about honouring your loved one's memory during the ceremony. They may suggest reading quotes or passages, or other tributes.

During the Reception

• Play their favourite song to get the party started.
• Create a commemorative presentation with slideshows, videos, and memories of your loved one.
• Visit their grave before or after the ceremony or reception to tell them about your day.
• Set up a special memory table with framed photos, sentimental objects, and keepsakes.
• Play their favourite song and get the band to announce that it is dedicated to them.
• Incorporate their favourite drink, whether that's a signature cocktail or a tipple they were known for drinking.
• Give a toast or say a few words in your speech to remember them.
• Donate to a charity in their honour, perhaps one supporting a cause they were passionate about.
• Serve a signature drink named after them and decorate with drink menus or cocktail napkins featuring their portrait.

Including a step-parent and a parent who has passed away

When it comes to wedding invitations, you might want to find special ways to include your late parent's name and keep their memory alive on your wedding day. Here are some suggestions for how to do this when including a step-parent and a deceased parent on the invitation:

Suggestions for Wedding Invitation Wording

Traditional and Formal:

[Step-parent's name] and [parent's name]

Request the honour of your presence

At the marriage of their daughter/son

[name]

On [date]

At [time]

Location

Less Formal:

[Step-parent's name] and [parent's name]

The families and friends of

At the celebration of the marriage of

[name]

On [date]

At [time]

Location

Alternative Wording:

[Step-parent's name] and [parent's name]

Request the honour of your presence

At the marriage of her/his

And the late [parent's name]'s daughter/son

[name]

On [date]

At [time]

Location

Other Considerations

It is also worth noting that there are other ways to include your deceased parent in the wedding celebration, such as:

• A memorial candle.
• Reserving a seat for them at the ceremony and reception.
• Including a note "in loving memory" in the wedding program.
• Giving a toast in their honour.
• Including memorial poems in the ceremony or reception.
• Holding a bouquet of flowers that reminds you of them.

Not including the groom's deceased parent's name in the invitation

If you are looking to not include the names of the groom's deceased parents in the wedding invitation, here are some ways to phrase the invitation:

Traditional Wording

If you are looking for traditional wedding invitation wording, the following examples are a good fit:

• "Mr. and Mrs. [Bride's Parents' Names] request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter [Bride's Name] to [Groom's Name], son of Mrs. [Groom's Mother's Name] and the late Mr. [Groom's Father's Name]."
• "Mrs. [Groom's Mother's Name] and the late Mr. [Groom's Father's Name] request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their son [Groom's Name] to [Bride's Name], daughter of Mr. and Mrs. [Bride's Parents' Names]."

Informal Wording

For a less formal approach, you could consider these options:

• "[Bride's Name] and [Groom's Name], together with their families, invite you to celebrate their wedding."
• "With profound joy, you are cordially invited to witness the marriage of [Bride's Name] and [Groom's Name]."

Single Parent or Widow/Widower

In the case of a single parent or widow/widower, the following phrasing can be used:

• "Mrs. [Groom's Mother's Name] requests the honour of your presence at the marriage of her son [Groom's Name] to [Bride's Name], daughter of Mr. and Mrs. [Bride's Parents' Names]."
• "Mr. [Groom's Father's Name] requests the honour of your presence at the marriage of his son [Groom's Name] to [Bride's Name], daughter of Mr. and Mrs. [Bride's Parents' Names]."

While it is not necessary to include the names of the groom's deceased parents in the invitation, there are other ways to honour their memory during the wedding. This could include displaying their photos, lighting a candle in their memory, or incorporating their favourite poem or song into the ceremony.

Frequently asked questions