Plus One Placement: Wedding Invitation Etiquette

Planning a wedding guest list is a tricky task, especially when it comes to deciding who gets a plus one. While there are no set rules, there are some general guidelines and etiquette tips to follow. For example, it is common courtesy to offer a plus one to anyone in an established relationship, such as married, engaged, or cohabiting couples. It is also a nice gesture to extend a plus one to members of the wedding party, as well as guests who are travelling and may not know many people at the wedding. On the other hand, single guests who are friendly with other guests and won't be isolated may not need a plus one. When it comes to addressing invitations, it is important to be clear and consistent. For guests with a plus one, the invitation can be addressed to Mr. Smith and Guest or the plus one's name can be added if known. For those without a plus one, simply addressing the invitation to the individual guest will suffice.

'And guest' on the envelope

When it comes to wedding invitation etiquette, there are a few different approaches you can take to let guests know they can bring a plus one. Here are some instructive paragraphs focused on the "and guest" envelope option:

"And Guest" on the Outer Envelope

If you're using a traditional wedding invitation suite with both an outer and inner envelope, the outer envelope typically includes the mailing address, postage, and return address. The inner envelope is more personalised and includes the names of the recipients, as well as any additional wedding stationery like the invitation, RSVP card, and envelope. When including a plus one, write the guest's name followed by "and guest" on the outer envelope. For example: "Mr. Zachary Morris and guest". This approach ensures that your guests clearly understand that they are invited with a plus one.

"And Guest" on the Inner Envelope

If you're opting for a more modern invitation style and only using an outer envelope, you can still include "and guest" to indicate a plus one. Write the guest's name and "and guest" on the outer envelope. For instance: "Mrs. Valerie Smith and guest". This approach maintains a sense of formality while conveying the plus one invitation.

"And Guest" on the Inner Envelope Only

In some cases, you may prefer to keep the outer envelope more formal and only include the name of the guest you're inviting. In this case, you can include "and guest" on the inner envelope to indicate the plus one. For example, the outer envelope could be addressed to "Mrs. Valerie Smith", while the inner envelope says "Mrs. Valerie Smith & Guest". This approach strikes a balance between formality and the clear communication of the plus one invitation.

"And Guest" with an RSVP Card

Another option to indicate a plus one is to include an RSVP card with your invitation. On the outer envelope, write the guest's name, such as "Mr. Zachary Morris". Then, on the RSVP card, indicate the number of guests invited. For instance, you can write "___ of 2 will be attending" or "You are invited to bring one guest". This approach allows your guest to confirm the number of attendees, including their plus one.

Communicating Plus One Options

When deciding how to communicate plus one options, it's essential to consider your guest list, budget, and venue capacity. Be consistent in offering plus ones to maintain fairness among your guests. If you're unable to offer plus ones to everyone, consider establishing clear criteria, such as only allowing wedding party members or single guests to bring a plus one. Remember to update your wedding website's FAQ section to address any plus one questions your guests may have.

Addressing the outer envelope

When addressing the outer envelope of a wedding invitation, there are a few key considerations to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to be clear and direct in communicating whether the invitee has a plus-one. This can be done by addressing the invitation to the exact invitee(s). For couples in a partnership, use both names. For single guests with a plus-one, address it to their name followed by "and guest". For guests without a plus-one, simply address it to their name only.

Another option is to write "Mr. Smith and Guest" on the outer envelope, which clearly indicates that the guest is allowed to bring a plus-one. If you are not sure about the name of the plus-one or prefer to give the guest the option to bring a guest of their choice, this approach can be useful. However, it is not necessary to include "and guest" on the outer envelope. You can simply write the guest's name, and they will see the "plus-one" invitation when they open the card.

It is worth noting that the outer envelope is just one part of the invitation. Some modern invitations have an inner envelope or card, which provides an additional opportunity to specify the names of invited guests, including plus-ones. This can be especially useful if you want to provide more detailed information or if you are concerned about the outer envelope looking too crowded.

When addressing the outer envelope, it is also essential to consider the format and style of the invitation. Traditional wedding invitations often have both an outer and inner envelope. The outer envelope is more formal and addresses the recipient(s), while the inner envelope provides additional details. In contrast, modern invitations may only have a single envelope or be sent electronically, requiring all invitees and their plus-ones to be listed clearly upfront.

In conclusion, when addressing the outer envelope of a wedding invitation, be clear and direct about plus-ones by addressing it to the exact invitee(s) and considering the format and style of the invitation. Remember that the outer envelope is just one part of the invitation, and you can utilise other components to convey the necessary information effectively.

Inner envelope

The inner envelope is the smaller envelope inside the outer mailing envelope. It is a tradition that stems from the early 20th century when mail was sorted by hand and would arrive dirty. The inner envelope would remain pristine and be handed directly to the recipient.

Today, the inner envelope is still used in formal wedding invitations to indicate exactly who is invited. It is also used to make clear who is not invited. For example, if the outer envelope is addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. David Wilson / The Wilson Family", the inner envelope would specify whether the children are invited by including or omitting their names.

When addressing the inner envelope to a single person with a plus-one, you can write:

• Mr. Styles and Guest
• Harry Styles and Guest

Including "and Guest" makes it clear that the invitee is allowed to bring a date. If you are having a small, intimate wedding, it is not necessary to invite plus-ones. However, if you are having a big celebration, it is preferred to allow single people to bring a guest.

The inner envelope can be much more casual than the outer envelope. It can include titles such as Mr. and Miss, or just the first names of the guests. If you are unsure of the preferred pronouns of your guests, it is best to omit titles like Mr. or Miss.

RSVP card

When it comes to wedding invitation etiquette, the "plus-one" generally refers to a guest being given permission to bring someone with them to the wedding. This could be a date or romantic interest, but it could also be a family member escorting an older guest or a friend attending with a single person.

There are a few different ways to indicate that a guest has a plus-one on their invitation. One way is to write "and guest" after the guest's name on the envelope, e.g., "Mr. James R. Smith and guest." If you know the name of the plus-one, you can include it on the outer envelope, e.g., "Mrs. Valerie Smith and Mrs. Hannah Woods." On the inner envelope, you can write "Mrs. Valerie Smith & Guest."

Another option is to include a note at the bottom of the card or on the back of the invitation, stating "You are invited to bring a guest" or "You are invited to bring a plus one."

To avoid confusion for guests who don't have a plus-one, you can include a phrase on the RSVP card such as "We have reserved 1 seat in your honour" or "Number of guests attending: 1." This will help to prevent any misunderstandings about the number of guests invited.

It's important to remember that offering plus-ones is not mandatory, and it's the couple's prerogative to decide who gets a plus-one based on their budget and venue capacity. However, it is generally considered polite to offer plus-ones to guests who are married, engaged, or in a long-term relationship, as well as members of the wedding party.

Invitation card

The invitation card is a crucial component of your wedding planning. It sets the tone for your special day and ensures your guests have the necessary details to join the celebration. Here is a comprehensive guide to help you navigate the intricacies of invitation wording, specifically regarding plus-one designations.

Wording the Invitation

The traditional approach involves using an outer and inner envelope. The outer envelope is addressed solely to the guest you know, indicating that no plus-one is offered. The inner envelope then lists the names of all invitees, including any plus-ones. However, modern invitations often forgo this dual-envelope format. In such cases, be explicit and clear in your wording.

For couples, address both partners by their full names. For instance, "Mrs. Valerie Smith and Mrs. Hannah Woods." This simple and direct approach ensures there is no ambiguity.

For single guests with a plus-one, the standard format is to write the guest's name followed by "and guest." For example, "Mr. James R. Smith and guest." This phrasing conveys that the invitee can bring a guest of their choosing, be it a romantic partner, family member, or friend.

If you know the name of the plus-one, you can include it on the invitation. This is a thoughtful gesture and ensures you are prepared with name cards, seating charts, and other personalised touches. However, it is not mandatory to know the plus-one's name, especially if the guest has not been dating their partner for a long time or if the guest wishes to bring a friend.

RSVP and Website Wording

To further clarify your plus-one designations, you can include specific wording on the RSVP card. For guests with a plus-one, you can write, "You are invited to bring one guest" or "You are invited to bring a plus-one." For those without a plus-one, a simple, "We have reserved one seat in your honour" or "Number of guests attending: 1" will suffice.

Your wedding website is another valuable tool for communicating expectations. If you are unable to accommodate plus-ones due to venue capacity or budget constraints, you can gently convey this with a sentence like, "Unfortunately, we are unable to accommodate plus-ones due to our venue capacity. We appreciate your understanding, and we can't wait to celebrate with you!" This approach ensures your guests are well-informed and helps to avoid any potential confusion or awkwardness.

Handling Plus-One Requests

Despite your best efforts, you may still receive requests from guests asking to bring a plus-one. In such cases, it is advisable to respond with kindness and consistency. If you truly cannot accommodate the request due to budget or space limitations, a polite reply such as, "We would have loved for you to bring a guest, but this is a very intimate affair, and our venue capacity/budget won't allow it," is appropriate.

Remember, while it is essential to be considerate of your guests' desires, ultimately, your wedding guest list is your prerogative. Don't feel obligated to offer plus-ones to everyone – make selections that align with your budget, venue capacity, and the atmosphere you wish to create for your special day.

Frequently asked questions