Best Man's Guide: Preparation And Duties

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibilities. From organising the stag do and choosing the suits to giving a speech and keeping the wedding rings safe, there's a lot to think about. So, if you've been chosen to be the best man, it's important to start preparing well in advance. Here's a quick overview of some of the key duties and tasks that a best man is typically expected to handle.

Organise the stag do

The stag do is one of the best man's most important duties. It's the best man's moment to shine and probably the moment all best men dream of. Planning the groom's last big night of freedom before he gets married is a big responsibility, so here are some tips to help you organise an epic stag do:

• Start planning early. The earlier you start, the less stressful this job will be, and the better the stag do will be. Ask the groom for a list of people he wants to attend and get a date in the diary as soon as possible.
• Create a group chat with all the groomsmen to make communication easy and ensure everyone can stay up to date.
• Consider everyone's budget. While a big blow-out in Vegas sounds amazing, if only a few people can afford to go, it might not be as fun as a stag do closer to home with everyone involved.
• Try to organise the stag do at least a month before the wedding so that everyone has time to recover and look their best on the day.
• Make it personal. Try to organise something that suits the groom's taste and personality.
• Think about ways to personalise the stag do, the best stag party games, and funny pranks to play on the groom (nothing that will get him arrested, though!).
• Pick two or three dates and ask the rest of the group which they can attend before finalising the date.
• If you're struggling for ideas, check out The Riverhouse at Goodspeed Station's guide to throwing a successful stag party.

Give a best man speech

Giving a best man speech is one of the most important duties of a best man. It is traditionally the last speech of the night, after the father of the bride and the groom. The best man's speech should be well-crafted, practiced, and focus on the newlyweds and their love story. It should also be started early on so that it doesn't become a stressful experience.

• Be mindful of the audience and consider that older relatives will be present. Avoid sexual or embarrassing stories that may not be suitable for everyone.
• Run your speech by a trusted person to check the tone and ensure it is not offensive.
• Speak slowly, pause for laughter, and mention everyone who needs to be mentioned.
• If you have any messages to read out, do this at the same time as your speech.
• If you are nervous, it may be helpful to look at best man speech introductions and toasts to end your speech.

Remember, the best man speech is a chance to celebrate the happy couple and wish them well. It is an honour to be chosen as the best man, and giving a thoughtful and entertaining speech is a great way to fulfil this important role.

Assist with attire

As the best man, you will be the groom's right-hand man, and your role will involve helping him with all his wedding attire needs. Here are some tips to help you assist the groom with his outfit:

Before the Wedding

Offer to help the groom with choosing his wedding attire. This is one of your main duties as the best man, and you will need to assist the groom in rounding up the ushers and other important members of the wedding party to go and try on wedding suits. It is a good idea to discuss ideas with the couple about the style and also decide whether the groomswear will be bought or hired. Traditionally, the couple pays for the wedding suits or the cost of hiring them, but if financial contributions are expected from the wedding party, make sure this is discussed openly and upfront.

On the Wedding Day

On the morning of the wedding, help the groom get ready. Ensure his suit and tie, cravat or bow tie are perfect, and check that everyone has the right shoes on. You may also be responsible for handing out any buttonholes to the bridal party.

After the Wedding

If the couple is leaving for their honeymoon straight away, they would really appreciate it if you helped return hired items, such as suits and any decorative details used at the venue. Offer to do this, and you will definitely earn a lot of brownie points.

Support the groom

Being the best man is a huge honour and a significant responsibility. Here are some ways you can support the groom as his right-hand man:

Emotional Support

Listen patiently to the groom's concerns and provide reassurance. Check in with him regularly, especially in the week before the wedding, to ensure he's doing okay and hasn't developed cold feet. Be a calming presence and help him stay focused and positive in the lead-up to the big day.

Planning and Logistics

Assist the groom with any wedding planning tasks he needs help with, such as contacting suppliers, managing RSVPs, or coordinating schedules. Help choose the groomsmen's attire and organise their fittings. Offer to help with any pre-wedding setup, such as moving furniture or directing suppliers.

Bachelor Party

Plan an epic bachelor party that the groom will never forget. Consult the groom on his preferences and work with the groomsmen to organise the guest list, location, and activities. Ensure the event is well-coordinated and that everyone has a great time.

On the Wedding Day

Help the groom get ready and ensure he arrives at the venue on time. Stand by his side during the ceremony and be his personal aide and adviser. Make sure he eats, drinks, and stays calm. Hold onto his phone and other personal items, and most importantly, keep the wedding rings safe until it's time to exchange vows.

Reception

Be the life of the party and get the dance floor started by dancing with the maid of honour. Mingle with the guests and ensure everyone is having a great time. If there is no official master of ceremonies, you may be asked to announce key moments, such as the couple's arrival, speeches, and cake-cutting.

Remember, your primary role is to support the groom and ensure his needs are met throughout the entire process. Be organised, stay calm, and enjoy the experience of being a part of your friend's special day.

Be the point of contact

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibilities. One of the most important duties of the best man is to act as the point of contact for everyone on the groom's side, including the groomsmen, family members, and vendors. Here are some tips to help you fulfil this role effectively:

Be Organised and Prepared:

Organisation is key to being an effective point of contact. Create a central document or spreadsheet that contains all the important information, such as contact details for the groomsmen and vendors, the schedule of events, and any other relevant details. This will ensure that you have all the information you need at your fingertips and can easily communicate it to those who need it.

Communicate Regularly:

Stay in close communication with the groom, groomsmen, and other relevant parties. Be responsive to their queries and keep them updated on any changes or new information. This will help ensure that everyone is on the same page and reduce the risk of confusion or miscommunication.

Manage the Groomsmen:

The best man is often responsible for managing the groomsmen and ensuring they fulfil their duties. This includes coordinating their outfits, providing them with information, and making sure they arrive on time and perform their assigned tasks. It's important to be clear and concise in your communication with the groomsmen to avoid any misunderstandings.

Be a Problem Solver:

As the point of contact, you may be approached with questions, concerns, or issues that arise during the wedding planning process or on the big day itself. Be prepared to handle these situations calmly and efficiently. Whether it's a last-minute change to the schedule or a missing item, your ability to problem-solve and find solutions will be invaluable.

Be Approachable and Welcoming:

Make sure you are approachable and welcoming to all the guests, especially those on the groom's side. Introduce yourself to those you don't know and be open to answering any questions they may have. This will help create a positive and inclusive atmosphere, making guests feel comfortable and ensuring the day runs smoothly.

Keep the Groom Informed:

While it's important to handle many of the logistics and queries yourself, don't forget to keep the groom informed of any important developments or issues that may arise. He may have the answer to a question or prefer to handle certain situations himself. Regular communication with the groom will ensure that you are both on the same page and working together effectively.

Frequently asked questions