Creative Alternatives To The Traditional Best Man Speech

what to do instead of best man speech

Being asked to be someone's best man is a tremendous honour, but it's also a role that comes with a lot of responsibility. One of the biggest tasks is delivering a memorable speech that celebrates the groom, entertains the guests, and shows your support for the happy couple. If the thought of public speaking fills you with dread, there are plenty of alternatives to the traditional best man's speech. You could perform a song or dance, create a video montage, or even give a speech as a duo with the maid of honour. If you're determined to stick to the traditional speech format, there are plenty of tips and tricks to help you craft something special.

Characteristics Values
Length 3-10 minutes
Content Stories, jokes, quotes, props, messages from afar, words of wisdom, praises for the couple, acknowledgements for the bridal party
Delivery Confident, clear, well-rehearsed, with good body language

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Thank the other speakers

Thanking the other speakers is an important part of a best man's speech. It's a chance to acknowledge the people who have contributed to the celebration and show your gratitude. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft this section of your speech:

Thank the Couple's Parents:

It is customary to thank the couple's parents, especially if they played a role in organising the wedding. You can express your gratitude for their hospitality and for raising such wonderful people. For example: "I'd like to begin by expressing my deepest gratitude to the couple's parents for raising such amazing individuals, whom I am fortunate to call my best friends. Thank you also for hosting this fantastic celebration for all of us to enjoy."

Thank the Previous Speakers:

It is polite to acknowledge the speakers who came before you, such as the father of the bride and the groom. You can use this as an opportunity to transition into your speech and set the tone. For instance: "Let's give a round of applause for the wonderful speech given by the maid of honour. And now, I'd like to share a few words about my friend and his new spouse."

Thank the Couple:

The best man's speech is also an opportunity to express your appreciation to the couple for including you in their special day. You can thank them for the honour of being the best man and for their friendship. For example: "Thank you, [groom], for choosing me as your best man. It has been an honour, and I am grateful for our long-standing friendship. Cheers to many more years of adventures together!"

Thank the Bridal Party:

Don't forget to acknowledge the bridal party, including the bridesmaids, groomsmen, and anyone else who played a significant role in the wedding. Thank them for their support and contribution to making the day memorable. For instance: "I want to thank the bridesmaids for their hard work and dedication in ensuring today was perfect. You ladies looked absolutely stunning, and your efforts did not go unnoticed. Cheers to you!"

Thank the Guests:

Finally, don't forget to thank the guests for their presence and well-wishes. You can express your appreciation for their attendance, especially those who may have travelled a long distance to be there. For example: "On behalf of the newlyweds, I want to thank each and every one of you for being here today. We are so touched by your love and support. Thank you for joining us in this celebration."

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Share personal stories

Sharing personal stories is a great way to make your best man speech stand out and be memorable. It is a good idea to include one or two anecdotes, such as your favourite memories with the groom, and perhaps with their partner as well. Keep the stories lighthearted, short, and avoid rambling.

Set the Scene

Provide context by sharing when and how you met the groom. This will help establish your connection with the couple and give guests who don't know you an understanding of your relationship with the groom. For example, you could say something like:

> "I first met [Groom] when we were in primary school. I had just moved to the area and he was the first person to talk to me. We became instant friends and have been inseparable ever since."

Include Specific Details

Make your stories engaging by including specific details such as time, place, and the people involved. Paint a picture for your audience by describing the scene and tapping into your memories. For instance:

> "It was the summer of 2010, and [Groom] and I had just started our first job out of college. We were both nervous and excited, and we quickly bonded over our shared love for coffee to get us through those long workdays."

Add a Touch of Humour

While it's important to be respectful and appropriate, adding a bit of humour to your stories can lighten the mood and make your speech more enjoyable. You could share a funny memory or an inside joke, as long as it's not too exclusive that only a few people will understand. For example:

> "One time, we decided to try our hand at cooking an elaborate dinner. Let's just say, it did not go as planned. The kitchen looked like a disaster zone, and the food was barely edible. We ended up ordering pizza, and it became our go-to plan for many nights after that."

Keep it Relevant

Make sure your stories are relevant to the couple and their relationship. Share anecdotes that showcase the groom's positive qualities and how he and his partner complement each other. For instance, you could share a story that demonstrates the groom's thoughtfulness:

> "A few years ago, [Groom] planned a surprise birthday party for his partner. He put so much effort into making sure every detail was perfect, from the decorations to the cake. It was such a heartwarming display of his love and dedication to making his partner feel special."

Include a Sentimental Moment

While humour is great, don't be afraid to include a sentimental story as well. Share a moment that showcases the groom's softer side or a meaningful experience you had together. For example:

> "I'll always remember the time [Groom] helped me through a difficult breakup. He was there for me every step of the way, offering a shoulder to cry on and endless ice cream nights. It's moments like these that remind me how lucky I am to have him as a friend."

Practice and Edit

Before the wedding, take the time to practice your speech and edit it as needed. Cut out any unnecessary parts and focus on keeping your stories concise and engaging. You don't want to ramble on for too long and lose the attention of your audience. Practice in front of a mirror, with a friend, or record yourself to get feedback and refine your delivery.

Remember, the key to sharing personal stories is to be authentic and sincere. Your stories don't have to be over-the-top or extremely funny; they just need to come from the heart and showcase your unique relationship with the groom.

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Talk about the couple's relationship

If you're the best man at a wedding, you might be feeling the pressure of having to give a speech. But don't worry, it's an honour to be chosen, and it's a chance for you to say some kind words about the happy couple and your relationship with them. Here are some tips for talking about the couple's relationship in your speech:

Start with a Strong Introduction

Begin your speech by introducing yourself and explaining your connection to the couple. You could share a quick joke or quote a poem to grab everyone's attention and ensure your speech starts off on a positive note. For example, "Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous."

Share How You Know the Couple

Let the guests know how long you've known the couple and how you met them. This adds a personal touch to your speech and helps the guests get to know you better. For instance, "Aaron and I have been best friends since grade school."

Tell a Story About How the Couple Met

If you played a part in how the couple met, feel free to share that story. It will give the guests insight into the couple's relationship and is a fun way to celebrate their love. For example, "I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two eight years ago."

Share Adjectives That Describe the Couple

Choose a few adjectives that best describe the couple individually and as a pair. This will help paint a picture of their relationship for the guests. For instance, "Aaron is an honorable man. Not only has he served in the US Armed Forces, but he's always carried himself with dignity and integrity."

Talk About the Positive Impact They Have on Each Other

Discuss how the couple brings out the best in each other and how they complement each other. This is a great way to showcase their bond and celebrate their love. For example, "Cassie, I can see how incredibly happy you have made my old friend over these last eight years, and just how much you have helped to change his life for the better."

Share a Marriage Quote

You can include a marriage quote that reflects the couple's relationship. It could be something serious or lighthearted, depending on the tone you want to set.

End with a Heartfelt Toast

Conclude your speech by raising a glass and wishing the couple a lifetime of happiness, love, and success. This is your chance to sincerely express your well wishes for the newlyweds. For example, "I truly believe that he will show the same love, dedication, and protection for his new wife as he has in serving his country. It takes a great man to serve his country, and it takes a greater man to serve his wife. Aaron Harrington is that man."

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Add personal touches

Adding personal touches to your best man speech is a great way to make your speech memorable and entertaining. Here are some ideas to help you add those special touches:

Share Stories About the Groom

Share funny, heartwarming, or embarrassing experiences that showcase the groom's personality and your relationship with him. These stories will not only entertain the audience but also connect with them on a deeper level. Ask mutual friends for stories if you need more material.

Share What the Groom Means to You

Express your feelings towards the groom and explain why you were chosen to be the best man. Talk about how he's always had your back, gives great advice, or any other qualities that make him special to you. This will add a layer of sentimentality to your speech.

Connect with the Audience

Make eye contact, speak clearly, use hand gestures, and express your emotions genuinely. Even the best speech will fall flat if you're not engaging with the audience. Practice your body language and eye contact to ensure you're connecting with the guests.

Address the Happy Couple Directly

Amidst all the fun stories, don't forget to speak directly to the couple and wish them a happy future together. Look at them while you're addressing them, and don't forget to include a heartfelt toast at the end of your speech.

Incorporate a Recurring Theme

Choose an overall theme for your speech, such as sports, college, vacations, or a mutual interest. This will give your speech a cohesive feel and make it easier for the audience to follow your train of thought.

Ask a Question and Answer it Throughout

Start your speech with a question that piques the audience's curiosity, such as "How can I possibly speak about all our experiences in just a few minutes?" Then, use the rest of your speech to answer that question, sharing anecdotes and memories along the way.

Remember, the key to adding personal touches is to focus on the groom and your relationship with him. Be genuine, and don't be afraid to show your emotions. Practice your speech, and you'll be well on your way to delivering a memorable and meaningful best man speech.

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Practice your delivery

Practising your delivery is a crucial part of preparing for your best man speech. Here are some tips to help you deliver your speech with confidence and make it a memorable one:

Know Your Audience

Understanding your audience is essential to tailoring your content and delivery effectively. Consider the age range, cultural backgrounds, and relationships of the guests. Avoid inside jokes or stories that might be inappropriate or exclude certain guests. Remember that your speech should focus on celebrating the couple and their unique bond.

Rehearse, Rehearse, Rehearse

Practise your speech as much as possible. Practise in front of a mirror, record yourself, or perform it for friends and family. This will help you refine your body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice. Practising will also help you become more comfortable with your material, reducing nerves and the likelihood of fumbling over your words.

Keep It Concise

Aim for a speech that is around 5-7 minutes long. A concise speech keeps your audience engaged and ensures you don't delay the festivities. If you have a lot of content, edit it down to the most essential and impactful parts. Leave your audience wanting more, rather than testing their patience.

Balance Humour and Sincerity

While humour is an important part of a best man's speech, don't force it if it's not your strong suit. Aim for a balance of humour and sincerity. Share personal stories, inside jokes, and genuine emotions about the groom and the couple. Be yourself, and your authenticity will shine through.

Confidence is Key

Confidence is crucial to a successful delivery. Even if you're nervous, speak slowly, clearly, and with enthusiasm. Stand with open body language and make eye contact with the audience. Remember, you're among friends and loved ones, so relax and enjoy the moment.

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Frequently asked questions

If public speaking isn't your strong suit, there are other ways to show your appreciation for the couple. You could put on an upbeat dance performance, sing the couple's favourite song, or even present a wedding video you've made.

Start by jotting down your thoughts, feelings, and memories of the groom. Using a template as a guide, craft a speech with a unique opening and closing that leaves a lasting impression. Include personal touches by sharing stories and experiences that showcase the groom's character and your relationship with him.

Avoid making the speech about yourself. Refrain from mentioning negativity about marriage, previous marriages/divorces, drinking, drugs, gambling, and adult humour. Keep the speech positive and lighthearted, focusing on celebrating the couple and their love.

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