Being asked to be someone's best man is a huge honour, but it's also a role that comes with a lot of responsibility. One of the most important tasks is giving a memorable speech. It's a chance to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show your support for the happy couple. A great toast can be an emotional moment for the newlyweds and their guests, but it can be stressful to write and deliver. Here are some tips on how to craft and deliver an outstanding best man speech.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Length | 3-7 minutes |
Opening | Grab the audience's attention; introduce yourself and your relationship to the couple |
Tone | Humorous, sentimental, or a mix of both |
Content | Stories and anecdotes about the groom and/or couple; compliments and well-wishes for the couple |
Conclusion | A toast to the couple |
What You'll Learn
Open with a joke or a quote
Opening your best man speech with a joke or a quote is a great way to grab your audience's attention and set the tone for the rest of your speech. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft a compelling and engaging introduction:
Introduce Yourself with a Twist:
Add a creative twist to the traditional self-introduction. For example, you can say something like, "Good evening, if you're in this room and don't know me by now, then you're probably at the wrong wedding. I am, of course, [your name], and I've been best friends with [groom] for 25 years." This approach will make your audience laugh and immediately engage them in your speech.
Crack a Joke:
A well-timed joke can lighten the mood and put your audience at ease. It could be a corny one-liner or a funny anecdote. For instance, "Hello, I'm the best man [your name]. This entire day has been beautiful so far. In fact, I'm getting emotional. The wedding cake has me in tiers."
Be Hilarious with a Straight Face:
Delivering an absurd statement with a straight face can create a unique comedic effect. For example, "Good evening, I am [your name], the best man and [relationship to groom] of [name of groom]. Tonight we're in a room full of great men—doctors, lawyers, military veterans, and successful businesspeople—yet I am the 'best.' His words, not mine."
Use a Quote:
Starting your speech with a meaningful quote can set the tone and give insight into the couple's relationship. You can use a famous quote or a line from a movie or book. For instance, "As Oscar Wilde said, 'Never love anybody who treats you like you're ordinary.' And [Partner], you've definitely chosen someone who's far from ordinary."
Combine Humour and a Quote:
You can also combine humour with a quote to create a light-hearted and engaging opening. For example, "According to Albert Einstein, 'When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, it seems like two minutes. When you sit on a hot stove for two minutes, it seems like two hours. That's relativity.' [Groom], I'm glad you found someone who makes time fly."
Remember, the key is to be creative, engaging, and respectful in your introduction. Keep it light-hearted, and don't forget to practise your delivery to ensure a smooth and confident performance.
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Share a story about the groom
Sharing stories about the groom is an essential part of a best man's speech. It helps to entertain the guests and gives an insight into the groom's character and your relationship with him. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft this section of your speech:
Choose Meaningful Stories:
Select anecdotes that reveal the groom's character and entertain the guests. Opt for funny, heartwarming, or even slightly embarrassing stories that showcase who the groom is and your unique bond with him. For instance, you could talk about his outgoing personality and how his partner's organisational skills complement his forgetfulness.
Include the Groom's Partner:
While sharing stories about the groom, try to link them to his partner whenever possible. This will make the story more meaningful and showcase the strength of their relationship. For example, you could talk about how the groom's partner helped him become more responsible and outgoing.
Ask Mutual Friends:
If you're struggling to come up with stories, consider asking mutual friends. They might be able to remind you of some great stories or incidents that you may have forgotten.
Balance Humour and Sentiment:
Your stories should ideally have a good mix of humour and sentiment. This will keep your speech engaging and help create a balance of emotions. You could start with a light-hearted story about how the groom and his partner met and then build a connection by sharing how you noticed them falling in love.
Structure Your Stories:
Use a clear structure for your stories to make them more impactful. Set up the context, develop the story with relevant details, and conclude with a satisfying payoff that ties back to the groom's character or relationship.
Practice and Time Your Stories:
Practising your speech, including the stories, is crucial. Rehearse your stories multiple times to refine your delivery and ensure they are well-paced and not too long. Mark your key transition points and be prepared to trim your stories if needed to maintain audience engagement.
Example 1: The Childhood Friend
> "The thing about James is that he’s always been the friend who’d drop everything to help you out. I remember when my car broke down at 3 AM in college. James not only came to get me but also brought coffee and donuts because, in his words, 'if we’re going to be stranded, we might as well have breakfast.'
> Sarah, I knew you were different when James started showing up early to things. Actually early – not James-early, which usually means 20 minutes late. You’ve brought out the best in him, while accepting all his quirks – including his questionable taste in movies and his firm belief that pineapple belongs on pizza."
Example 2: The Professional Colleague
> "What struck me about Tom was his ability to find humour in any situation, even when facing tight deadlines or challenging projects. His famous line was always, 'Well, it could be worse – we could be working in accounting.' Sorry to any accountants present!
> Then Emma came along, and suddenly Tom was organizing his desk, coming to meetings prepared, and even started making coffee that didn’t taste like motor oil. Emma, you’ve achieved what three different managers couldn’t – you’ve made Tom a morning person."
Example 3: The Sibling Speech
> "I’ve watched Mark evolve from the kid who used to steal my action figures to the man standing here today. Though, Sarah, I should warn you – he still occasionally raids my Netflix account.
> Sarah, watching you become part of our family has been incredible. You’re not just Mark’s wife now – you’re the sister I never had. Though, unlike Mark, you actually return the things you borrow."
Example 4: The Humorous Approach
> "Alex has been my partner in crime since university. We’ve shared everything – apartments, classes, and even dating advice. Though after seeing some of his ex-girlfriends, I really should have ignored that last one.
> Then came Julia. Suddenly, Alex was checking his phone every two minutes, smiling like an idiot, and actually ironing his shirts. Julia, you’ve accomplished the impossible – you’ve turned my best friend into a functioning adult."
Example 5: The Emotional Tribute
> "Mark has always been the friend who shows up – not just for the good times, but for the tough ones too. He was there when I lost my dad, sitting with me in silence because he knew words weren’t enough. He was there for every major milestone in my life, usually with terrible jokes that somehow always made things better.
> Lisa, from the moment Mark met you, something changed. He started talking about the future differently. It wasn’t just about his plans anymore – it was about your plans together. Watching your love story unfold has been like watching my best friend discover a whole new kind of happiness."
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Compliment the couple
Complimenting the couple is a crucial part of a best man's speech. It's a chance to celebrate the couple's unique love story and welcome the partner into your circle of friends. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft this section of your speech:
Talk about their relationship:
Describe how the couple met and how their relationship has grown. If you played a part in them getting together, definitely mention that! Share the moment you realized their partner was "The One" for your friend. If you've known the groom for a long time, talk about how the partner exceeds all your expectations. Emphasize how happy you are for your friend and how perfect their partner is for them.
Share meaningful stories:
Select anecdotes that reveal the couple's character and entertain the guests. Choose stories that showcase their positive traits and how they balance each other out. For example, if the groom is outgoing but forgetful, and the bride is more thoughtful and organized, share a story about how the bride's organizational skills once helped the groom out of a tricky situation caused by his forgetfulness.
Highlight their positive impact on each other:
Talk about how the couple has changed since being together. Maybe the groom started showing up early to things or the bride started accepting all the groom's quirks. Mention how they bring out the best in each other. For instance, "You've brought out the best in him, and he's taught you how to properly do laundry. To [Groom] and [Bride], may your love continue to grow, your laundry stay wrinkle-free, and your future be filled with endless loads of happiness."
Wish them well:
Conclude by congratulating the couple and offering a toast to their future together. You can make this personal, witty, or use a quote. For example, "May your love continue to grow, your laughter never fade, and your future be filled with endless joy. Everyone, please raise your glasses to the happy couple!"
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Conclude with well-wishes
The best man's speech is a chance to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show your support for the happy couple. The conclusion of your speech should be a memorable closing that ties back to the theme of your speech and expresses your well-wishes for the couple. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft a meaningful and effective conclusion:
Express Your Well-Wishes
Offer your best wishes for the couple's future together. Wish them a happy and fulfilling life as they embark on this new journey. You can speak about the exciting possibilities and wonderful opportunities that lie ahead for them. For example, you could say something like, "You two have found your soulmates in each other. May your love continue to grow and flourish as you build your life together. Congratulations and best wishes for a lifetime of happiness!"
Share Your Hopes for Their Marriage
Share your hopes and aspirations for their marriage. You can talk about the strength of their bond, the joy they bring to each other's lives, and your confidence in their ability to overcome any challenges as a team. For instance, you could say, "Your marriage is ahead of you, filled with endless possibilities and incredible moments. I wish you both all the love and joy that life has to offer. May your bond grow stronger with each passing day, and may you always find comfort and support in each other."
Reflect on Their Relationship
Take a moment to reflect on the couple's relationship and the love they share. You can talk about how they complement each other, the joy they bring to each other's lives, and the unique connection they share. For example, "Your love for each other is an inspiration to all of us. The way you support and uplift each other is truly special. May your love continue to deepen and flourish as you navigate this beautiful journey together."
Share a Quote or Poem
You can include a meaningful quote or poem as part of your conclusion to add a touch of sentimentality. Choose something that reflects the couple's relationship, their personalities, or their journey together. For instance, "Love is not about finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. And you two have certainly found perfection in each other's imperfections. May your love continue to grow and inspire all those around you."
Thank the Couple
Express your gratitude to the couple for allowing you to be a part of their special day. Thank them for the honour of being the best man and for the opportunity to share this moment with them. For example, "Thank you, [groom] and [bride], for letting me stand here today as your best man. It has been an honour to share in this celebration of your love. I wish you both all the best as you embark on this new chapter of your lives together."
Remember, the conclusion of your speech is a chance to leave a lasting impression, so make it heartfelt, sincere, and aligned with the tone of your speech.
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Keep it short and sincere
Keeping your speech short and sincere is a great way to deliver a meaningful best man's speech. Here are some tips to help you craft and deliver a concise and heartfelt speech:
Plan Ahead
Give yourself plenty of time, at least a month, to write your speech. The weeks leading up to the wedding can be hectic, so it's essential to start early and relieve some pressure. Write down your thoughts, feelings, and memories. Using a template as a guide can be helpful if you're unsure where to start.
Express Gratitude
Begin your speech by stepping onto the dance floor and addressing the crowd. Introduce yourself as the best man and express gratitude. Thank the couple's parents for raising such wonderful people, thank the couple for having you there, and thank the guests for coming. You can even throw in a light-hearted one-liner to break the ice.
Talk About Your Relationship with the Groom
Share how you met the groom, how long you've known each other, and what kind of friend he is. If you can, include a funny anecdote or story that sums up his personality and character. For example, he might be outgoing but forgetful, and his spouse could be the organised one who keeps him on track.
Focus on the Couple's Relationship
Share a story that epitomises the couple's relationship. Talk about the moment you realised the groom's partner was "The One" for him. If you've known the groom for a long time, you might have had an idea of what his perfect partner would be like, and the person sitting in front of you exceeds all expectations. Emphasise how happy you are for your friend and celebrate the fact that they've found someone so perfect for them.
Keep it Short and Sweet
A good best man's speech is typically short and sweet, around three to five minutes. Remember that it will feel much shorter when you're delivering it, and you might rush through it a little. Keep in mind the other speeches that will follow and the guests' experience—they'll be eager to eat, drink, and dance!
Practice, Practice, Practice
Practising your speech is crucial. Read it aloud to yourself several times and record yourself to refine your delivery and improve your confidence. Consider sending the video to a friend or relative for honest feedback. While it's a good idea to memorise your speech, having notes will help you feel less anxious. Use notecards or a small notepad to jot down key points, ensuring you don't fumble with scrap paper or, worse, your phone, which can ruin the photographer's shots.
Finish with Congratulations and a Toast
Conclude your speech by congratulating the happy couple and offering a toast to their future. This can be personal, witty, or a quote. You can wish them a lifetime of happiness, excellent health, and success.
Things to Avoid
There are a few topics you should steer clear of in your speech:
- Inappropriate anecdotes or embarrassing stories—keep it PG.
- Any talk of exes or previous relationships.
- Long-winded stories—keep them lighthearted and short.
- Profanity or other PG-13 talk—remember, it's a family event.
By following these tips, you'll be well on your way to delivering a short and sincere best man's speech that celebrates the couple and leaves a lasting impression.
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Frequently asked questions
Your speech should include an introduction, anecdotes, heartfelt moments, and a concluding toast. It should be memorable, heartfelt, and engaging.
Best man speeches should be short and sweet. Aim for a length of between three and seven minutes.
It's perfectly normal to feel nervous about public speaking. To help calm your nerves, practice your speech multiple times beforehand. On the day, take three deep breaths before you start speaking.
Avoid inappropriate anecdotes, ex-partners or previous relationships, political or religious views, inside jokes, and embarrassing personal moments.