Asking someone to be your best man is a big deal. The best man is expected to be by your side throughout the journey to your big day, supporting you and sharing in the excitement. So, how do you go about asking? It's important to make it memorable. You could ask during a shared activity, like playing golf or watching a football game. You could also send a card, which can be a great keepsake. Or, you could give a gift, like a personalised hip flask or a box of their favourite things. It's a special moment, so make it fun, thoughtful, and personal.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Timing | 8 months to 1 year in advance |
Method | In-person, card, gift, group outing, double date |
Tone | Formal, lighthearted, funny, creative, simple |
Gifts | Hip flask, cigar, cufflinks, tie, socks, cards, subscription box, bouquet of liquor |
What You'll Learn
- Gifts: from engraved flasks to personalised golf balls, a gift can be a great way to ask your best man
- Timing: ask your best man at least eight months to a year before the wedding
- Customisation: make the proposal personal, with a handwritten letter, a custom gift, or a simple talk over a drink
- Experience: share an experience, like a sports event, and propose during it
- Memories: incorporate inside jokes or themes from shared experiences into the proposal
Gifts: from engraved flasks to personalised golf balls, a gift can be a great way to ask your best man
Grooms often ask their friends to be their best man, and gifts are a great way to pop the question. From engraved flasks to personalised golf balls, there are many gift options to choose from. Here are some ideas to get you started:
Engraved Flasks
An engraved flask is a classic and timeless gift idea. It can be personalised with the name or initials of the best man, making it a memorable keepsake. You can also include a funny or sentimental note attached to the flask, asking your friend to be your best man. This adds a thoughtful touch and makes the moment even more special.
Personalised Golf Balls
For the golf enthusiast, personalised golf balls are a unique and fun option. You can engrave their name or initials on the balls, or even include a funny message or inside joke. Pair the golf balls with other golf-themed items, such as engraved putters, ball markers, or a custom golf ball wine stopper, to create a themed gift set.
Whiskey Decanter Set
A whiskey decanter set is a sophisticated choice for the best man who appreciates a fine drink. You can personalise the set with engraved glasses, featuring the name or initials of your friend. This gift is not only useful for the wedding day but also serves as an elegant memento that can be cherished for years to come.
Cufflinks
Cufflinks are a classic gift idea and a perfect addition to any wedding outfit. They can be engraved or personalised with the initials of the best man. Cufflinks are a subtle yet stylish way to show your appreciation and add a touch of elegance to the overall attire.
Personalised Socks
If you're looking for something playful and quirky, consider personalised socks. You can choose a pattern or colour that matches your wedding theme, or even add a funny message or design. Socks are a practical yet fun gift that your best man will surely appreciate.
Remember, when choosing a gift, it's important to consider your friend's personality and interests. By adding a personalised touch, you can make the moment memorable and show how much you value their presence on your special day.
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Timing: ask your best man at least eight months to a year before the wedding
Asking your closest friends to be a part of your wedding is a significant and memorable moment. Your best man will be by your side throughout your journey to the big day, supporting you and sharing in the excitement. It is important to ask them to be your best man at least eight months to a year before the wedding. This is because being a best man is a big job and they will have a lot of responsibilities, including planning your bachelor party, and they will need time to prepare.
Before you think about how to ask your best man, think long and hard about who you'll be asking. You may be tempted to ask a new friend, but it’s better to play it safe by choosing someone who has been in your life for a long time. In the space between wedding planning and the wedding day, your budding friendship could go in one direction or another. Ask yourself who has really been there for you throughout the years. Out of all your friends, who is it you text in a crisis? Who do you most want to grab a drink with at the end of a long, hard week? When you sit down and ask yourself these questions honestly, the question of who to ask to be your best man should be an easy one.
Your best man doesn't have to be a man at all. You can ask your sister, your favourite female cousin, or your best female friend to be in your party, serving as "best woman", "groomslady", or whatever creative moniker you can come up with. There are no rules. Choose the most important people in your life, regardless of their gender.
Once you've chosen your best man, you might be tempted to just send them a text asking if they're up for it, but it’s a huge honour to be asked to be part of someone’s bridal party, so you should give it the effort it deserves. You don’t have to make a huge event out of asking your best man, but don’t take an entirely casual approach, either. Instead of emailing or texting, make a point of calling them or speaking with them in person.
There are lots of creative ways to ask your best man. Asking your friends to be part of your wedding party is an opportunity to show them how much they mean to you. Make it fun, thoughtful, and personal. Here are some ideas:
- Handwritten notes: A heartfelt, personal letter is a timeless way to ask. Reflect on your friendship and share why having them as part of your day matters.
- Surprise dinner or drinks: Gather your best man and groomsmen for a dinner or drinks, then pop the question to the whole group. It’s a great way to celebrate the moment together.
- Sports game: If your group is into sports, consider asking them during a game, perhaps by wearing personalised shirts or caps that say “Best Man”.
- Proposal gift: This is becoming a popular choice. You can hand it to them in person or send it to them if they live far away. It's a lovely way to add a little surprise to the moment. A fun gift that will be useful for the big day is even better!
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Customisation: make the proposal personal, with a handwritten letter, a custom gift, or a simple talk over a drink
Customisation: Make the Proposal Personal
Asking someone to be your best man is a big deal. It's a way of saying, "You're important to me and I want you with me throughout this entire process". So, when it comes to popping the question, it's important to make the proposal personal. Here are some ideas to help you ask that special person to be your right-hand man:
A Handwritten Letter
A heartfelt, personal letter is a timeless way to ask someone to be your best man. Take the time to reflect on your friendship and share why having them by your side on your wedding day matters. If you're not great with emotional conversations, a handwritten letter is a perfect way to express your thoughts and feelings. It can also be a wonderful keepsake for your best man to remember the occasion by.
A Custom Gift
If you're not sure how to ask someone to be your best man, why not give them a gift and let the gift do the asking for you? There are many "proposal" gifts available, from personalised t-shirts and mugs to whiskey glasses and cufflinks. Ideally, you'll give your best man something that they'll use and that ties back to your relationship. For example, if you and your best man share a love for coffee, a personalised coffee mug would be a great choice. Or, if he's a wine connoisseur, a customised wine glass would be a perfect fit.
You can also get creative with your gift-giving. Here are some unique ideas:
- Engrave their favourite bottle of spirits with a special invitation.
- Send them a subscription box filled with their favourite things and a formal invitation.
- Give them a cigar with a letter attached, representing the unique sense of brotherhood between good friends.
- Put together a "starter kit" with wedding essentials like cufflinks, a tie bar, and a small bottle of their favourite liquor.
- Get them a bouquet of their favourite liquor in miniature bottles, with a note asking them to be your best man.
A Simple Talk Over a Drink
Sometimes, the best way to ask someone to be your best man is simply to have a conversation. Invite your friend out for a drink and pop the question in a casual yet meaningful way. This can be a great opportunity to celebrate the moment together and make it more personal.
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Experience: share an experience, like a sports event, and propose during it
If you're looking to ask your best friend to be your best man during a sports event, here are some ideas to make it a memorable occasion:
Plan a sports-themed proposal
If your best friend is a sports enthusiast, consider planning a proposal that incorporates their favourite sport. For example, you could personalise a ball with the question "Will you be my best man?" and give it to them as a gift before the event. Alternatively, you could incorporate sports-themed items into a proposal box, such as a customised football or a set of golf balls.
Propose during a live sports game
If you're both fans of a particular sport, you could plan your proposal during a live game at a stadium or court. Contact the venue's public relations team to coordinate the logistics, such as displaying your message on the scoreboard or video board. Just make sure you have an aisle seat for easy access and remember that this will be a very public proposal!
Invite them to a game and pop the question
If you and your best friend regularly attend games together, this could be the perfect opportunity to ask them to be your best man. Wear matching shirts or caps that say "Groomsman" or "Best Man" to make the occasion extra special. You could also present them with a gift, such as a personalised beer label or a flask, to remember the day by.
Share a sports-related experience
Instead of proposing during a live game, consider sharing a sports-related experience with your best friend. For example, you could plan a day at the races or a gourmet dinner with a sports theme. Incorporate inside jokes or references to your shared love of sports in your proposal to make it more personal.
Propose during a sports-themed party
If you're looking for a more intimate setting, why not host a sports-themed party and propose there? Invite your friends over to watch the game, and present them with "Will you be my best man?" cards during halftime. You could even create a groomsman starter pack with items like a shaving kit, cufflinks, or a tie bar.
Remember, when asking someone to be your best man, it's important to consider their availability and what you expect from them. Make sure they understand the commitment and responsibilities involved in being a best man, and choose someone who you know will be able to support you throughout the wedding planning process.
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Memories: incorporate inside jokes or themes from shared experiences into the proposal
When asking your best friend to be your best man, it's important to consider the weight of the request. Being a best man is a big job and a big commitment. Your best man will be expected to support you throughout the wedding planning process, throw your bachelor party, and stand by your side as you say your vows. So, when you "propose" to your best man, it's a great idea to make the moment memorable and fun.
If you share a hobby or pastime, consider planning your proposal around that activity. For example, if you and your best man have been golfing buddies for years, why not ask him while you're out on the golf course? Or, if you're both fans of the same football team, invite him over to watch a game and pop the question at halftime. Asking your best man while engaging in a shared interest is a great way to make your proposal feel more personal.
Another idea is to give your best man a gift that "pops the question" for you. There are many "proposal" gifts available, from personalised t-shirts to whiskey glasses, or you could give him a full-sized bottle of his favourite booze with a funny or sentimental note attached. If he lives far away, you could send him a proposal gift box with items that are practical for the big day and beyond.
If you're not great with emotional conversations, you could also ask your best friend to be your best man through a card. This could be a heartfelt, nostalgic letter reflecting on your friendship and why you want him by your side on your wedding day. Or, if you're not one for getting sentimental, you could keep the card simple and straightforward, infusing it with humour or inside jokes.
- Create a "best man box" with a cool tin or wooden box as a base. Fill it with items that are meaningful to your friendship, like a small bottle of his favourite liquor, an expensive cigar, and an engraved lighter.
- Plan a surprise dinner or drinks and give your best man a card with a nostalgic walk down memory lane, highlighting your favourite moments together before asking him to be in your wedding party.
- Design personalised proposal gifts, like t-shirts or whiskey glasses, with inside jokes or references that only the two of you will understand.
- If you're both sports enthusiasts, wear personalised shirts asking "Will you be my best man?" while playing a game or watching a match together.
- Get creative and make a bouquet of roses with a note asking your best friend to say "yes" to being your best man. This is a fun way to embarrass your friend (in a lighthearted way) and incorporate a playful element into your proposal.
- Sign your best friend up for a subscription box filled with treats that tie back to your relationship, such as his favourite childhood candies or snacks. Include a personalised note asking him to be your best man, and be sure to compare notes with your partner before making your request official!
Remember, when incorporating inside jokes or shared experiences, it's important to ensure that the references are understandable and relatable to your best friend. You don't want to confuse or exclude them with overly specific jokes that only you understand! Keep the moment lighthearted, fun, and memorable, and your best friend is sure to be honoured by your thoughtful proposal.
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Frequently asked questions
It is recommended to ask your best man and groomsmen nine to ten months before the wedding. This gives them enough time to plan any necessary travel and adjust their schedules.
The best man is usually the groom's brother, close relative, or best friend. However, there are no set rules, and you can choose anyone who holds a significant role in your life.
Traditionally, there is only one best man. However, it is not uncommon to have two or three best men, especially if you have multiple brothers or want to include your fiancée's brothers.
There are many creative ways to ask someone to be your best man. You can make it a casual conversation, write a card, or give a gift. Some popular gift ideas include custom cufflinks, engraved bottles of their favourite spirit, or a "starter kit" with items like a bow tie, cufflinks, and a small bottle of their favourite drink.