Best Man's Guide: Duties And Responsibilities

Being a best man is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. The role of the best man is to be the groom's right-hand man, providing support and assistance in the lead-up to and during the wedding. This includes helping the groom with everything from suit fittings to transport arrangements, as well as planning the bachelor party and giving a memorable speech. The best man is also responsible for keeping the wedding rings safe, coordinating with the groomsmen, and providing emotional support to the groom. Effective communication and organisation are key to fulfilling the role successfully.

Help choose the suits

As the best man, one of your main duties will be to help choose the suits. You will need to assist the groom in rounding up the ushers and other important members of the wedding party to go and try on wedding suits.

It is a good idea to discuss ideas with the couple about style and also decide whether the groomswear is to be bought or hired. Traditionally, the couple pays for the wedding suits or the hire of them, but if it is decided that financial contributions are required, make sure this is discussed openly and upfront. It is important that you and the couple communicate this with the ushers so that everyone is aware ahead of trying anything on.

You will also need to make sure that each groomsman orders their attire in a timely fashion. If you are renting or purchasing as a group, you will need to make sure the order is submitted and collect payment from everyone. Don't forget about alterations! One of the often-overlooked best man duties is to ensure that the groomsmen's suits are all received and tailored.

If the suits are bought, you may be tasked with taking them to be dry-cleaned after the wedding—the sooner the better. If they are rented, you will need to make sure that all of the tuxes are returned in a timely fashion. This may require a few texts to certain groomsmen, but you don't want to be charged for late returns.

Plan the bachelor party

Planning a bachelor party is one of the best man's most important duties. It's your job to organise a celebration that suits the groom's style, not your own. Here are some tips to help you plan an unforgettable bachelor party:

Consult the Groom

First, talk to the groom about the type of bachelor party he wants. Does he want to travel or stay local? Does he want a wild party or something more low-key? It's important to plan a party that aligns with his interests and personality.

Collaborate with the Groomsmen

Planning a bachelor party can be a big task, so enlist the help of the other groomsmen. They can provide recommendations and assist with logistics. It's also a good idea to involve them in the decision-making process to ensure that the plans suit everyone's schedules and budgets.

Choose a Date and Location

Pick a date and location that works for everyone. If you're planning a destination bachelor party, give the groomsmen plenty of notice so they can make the necessary travel arrangements. Consider the group's budget when selecting a location—a trip to Vegas might sound fun, but it's not worth it if some groomsmen can't afford it.

Spread the Word

Work with the groomsmen to invite the people the groom wants to attend. Create a guest list with the groom's input and send out invitations or save-the-dates. It's important to give people enough notice so they can plan their schedules accordingly.

Plan Activities

Depending on the location and duration of the bachelor party, you'll want to plan a variety of activities to keep everyone entertained. This could include anything from golfing, bar hopping or distillery tours to more adventurous activities like skydiving or white water rafting. Choose activities that the groom will enjoy and that will create lasting memories.

Handle the Logistics

Take care of the practical details such as transportation, accommodation, and food and drink. If you're staying local, you might want to book a party bus or organise a pub crawl. For a destination bachelor party, book accommodations that suit the group's budget and plan meals or make restaurant reservations.

Make it Memorable

Add personal touches to make the bachelor party unique and memorable. This could include creating a playlist of the groom's favourite songs, organising a photo scavenger hunt or planning a special gift for the groom. Think of ways to make the groom feel celebrated and ensure everyone has a great time.

Remember, the key to planning a successful bachelor party is communication and collaboration. Involve the groom and groomsmen in the planning process, and don't be afraid to delegate tasks. By working together, you can create an unforgettable bachelor party that the groom will always cherish.

Give a best man's speech

Giving a Best Man's Speech

The best man's speech is one of the most important duties of the best man, and it's a big responsibility. Here's a step-by-step guide to help you deliver an amazing and memorable speech.

Before the Speech

Planning and preparation are key to a successful best man's speech. Here are some things to consider beforehand:

• Start writing your speech early. Don't leave it until the last minute.
• Be mindful of your audience. While it's okay to be a little cheeky, remember that older relatives will be present, so avoid overly sexual or embarrassing stories.
• Run your speech by a trusted person to ensure it's appropriate and well-crafted.
• Practise your speech so that you feel comfortable and confident on the day.
• If there are multiple best men, collaborate with them to write and practise the speech together.
• If you're nervous, remember to speak slowly and pause for laughter.
• Make sure you mention everyone who needs to be mentioned.

During the Speech

On the day, here are some tips to help you deliver your speech:

• Be clear and confident in your delivery.
• Speak slowly and pause for laughter.
• Mention everyone who needs to be mentioned.
• If you're nervous, take a moment to pause and collect yourself. It's okay to show some emotion!
• Remember to follow the traditional wedding speech order. The best man's speech usually comes after the father of the bride and/or groom's speech.

After the Speech

Once you've delivered your speech, you can relax and enjoy the rest of the celebration. However, as an important member of the wedding party, it's your job to ensure that the guests are having a good time. Here are some additional duties to keep the reception alive and moving:

• Be the first one on the dance floor to encourage others to join.
• Mingle with the guests and make sure everyone is having a great time.
• Dance with the maid of honour, the bride, and other key relatives.
• Keep an eye on the guests and ensure they are behaving accordingly.

Remember, the best man's speech is a chance to celebrate your friend's special day and share some heartfelt words. With the right amount of preparation and a touch of humour, you'll be sure to deliver a speech that the newlyweds and guests will remember for years to come!

Keep the wedding rings safe

Keeping the wedding rings safe is one of the most important duties of the best man. Here are some tips to ensure you don't misplace the rings:

Before the Wedding

As the best man, you should confirm with the couple if there is an official ring bearer (this could even be a dog!). If not, you will be responsible for keeping the rings safe until the ceremony. It is a good idea to get a safe place to store the rings, such as your inner jacket pocket, and triple-check that your pocket doesn't have a hole! You should also be aware of where the rings are at all times.

During the Wedding

If you are the ring bearer, make sure you have the rings ready when the couple is about to exchange their vows. If not, ensure that the ring bearer has the rings before the ceremony begins.

After the Wedding

Once the rings have been exchanged, your responsibility for keeping them safe is over. However, you may now be tasked with other duties, such as helping to organise and store the wedding gifts, including cards and presents, and returning any hired items, such as suits or decorative details used at the venue.

Organise the ushers

Ushers are an important part of the wedding party, and as the best man, it's your job to organise them. Here are some tips to help you with this task:

Know the Ushers

Firstly, get to know the other ushers. You may already be familiar with them, but if not, introduce yourself and get everyone's contact details. This will make it easier to communicate and coordinate with them leading up to and on the wedding day.

Understand Usher Duties

Make sure you and the other ushers are clear on what their duties are. Typically, ushers are responsible for greeting and seating guests, handing out orders of service, and helping with any other logistics on the wedding day. Knowing what is expected of them will help them perform their roles effectively.

Communicate with the Ushers

Stay in regular communication with the ushers leading up to the wedding. Create a group chat or email chain to keep everyone informed and share important information, such as the schedule for the day, dress code, and any specific requests from the couple.

Assist with Attire

As the best man, you will likely be involved in choosing the attire for the groomsmen, including the ushers. Help coordinate suit fittings and ensure everyone has their outfits sorted well in advance of the wedding. This may also include organising any accessories, such as buttonholes, for the ushers to wear on the day.

Be a Point of Contact

Be the go-to person for the ushers if they have any questions or concerns. They may need guidance on what to do or where to be at certain times during the wedding. It's your job to keep them informed and organised, so they can focus on making the day special for the happy couple.

Keep the Ushers on Schedule

On the wedding day, help keep the ushers on schedule. Make sure they are where they need to be at the right times, especially during key moments such as the ceremony, photos, and reception. This will ensure the day runs smoothly and that the ushers are able to fulfil their duties effectively.

Frequently asked questions