Wording Wedding Invites: Including Parents' Names Gracefully

Wedding invitation wording can be tricky, especially when it comes to including your parents' names. Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts and are named at the top of the invitation, but there are many ways to include both sets of parents graciously, especially if they are contributing financially or you want to honour them. Here are some options to introduce your parents' names on your wedding invites while navigating etiquette and modern sensibilities.

Including both sets of parents

Traditional Wording

Traditionally, the bride's parents' names would appear on the wedding invites, as they were usually the ones hosting and paying for the wedding. However, nowadays, it is common for multiple sets of parents or the couple themselves to host and pay for the wedding.

Modern Wording

If you want to include both sets of parents on your invites, here are some modern ways to word it:

• "Together with their families/parents, [Bride] and [Groom] invite you to share in the joy of their marriage."
• " [Bride's parents' names] and [Groom's parents' names] invite you to celebrate the marriage of their children."
• "The families of [Bride] and [Groom] cordially invite you to their wedding."
• "Together with their parents, [Bride] and [Groom] request the honour of your presence at their wedding."

Divorced or Remarried Parents

If your parents are divorced or remarried, you can list them separately. For divorced parents, the mother's name is usually listed first, followed by the father's name. For remarried parents, you can include their spouse's name if desired.

Cultural Considerations

It's important to consider cultural expectations and traditions when deciding whether to include parents' names on wedding invites. For example, in some Southeast and East Asian cultures, it is customary to include parents' names, even if they are not paying for the wedding.

Communicating with Your Parents

If you're unsure about including your parents' names, it's essential to communicate with them and understand their preferences and expectations. Be considerate and gracious, especially if they are contributing financially or have specific cultural traditions they want to honour.

Remember, there are no hard and fast rules, so feel free to adapt the wording to suit your unique family dynamics and relationships.

Honouring deceased parents

Wedding Invitation Wording Ideas

If you want to include your deceased parent on your wedding invitations, here are some formal and informal wording examples:

• "Mrs Sharon Henderson and the late Mr Nathan Henderson request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Preston John Brackman on Saturday, the twenty-first of July Two-thousand and twenty-six at six o'clock in the evening in Dripping Springs, Texas."
• "Fatima and the late Arjun Sharma, the families and friends of, at the celebration of their marriage on Saturday, July 21st, 2024, at 6:00 pm at Bluxome Street Winery, San Francisco, California."
• "Mr and Mrs Jay Courier, Mrs Hannah Fullerton and the late Andrew Fullerton request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their children on Saturday, the twenty-first of July Two-thousand and twenty-six at six o'clock in the evening, 912 Sixth Street South, Minneapolis, Minnesota."
• "Moira and Alistair Schiller request the honour of your presence at the marriage of her and the late Porter Blackman's daughter on Saturday, the twenty-first of July Two-thousand and twenty-six at six o'clock in the evening."

In addition to including them on your wedding invitations, here are some ways to honour your deceased parents during the wedding ceremony:

• Memorial items: Wear something that belonged to them, such as a pocket square or a piece of fabric from their favourite clothing item. You can also incorporate their favourite flowers into your bouquet or wear their favourite scent.
• Reserved seat: Reserve a front-row seat for your late loved one by placing one of their jackets on a chair, putting a bouquet of flowers on it, or blocking it off with ribbons and a custom sign.
• Incorporate symbolic flowers: Use flowers that symbolise remembrance and honour, such as white roses. Alternatively, use their favourite flowers in your ceremony decor, such as aisle markers, boutonnieres or bouquets.
• Moment of reflection: Ask your wedding officiant to announce a moment of silence at the start of the ceremony or shortly before you exchange rings.
• Candle lighting ritual: Light a unity candle at the start of the ceremony to signify your loved one's spirit being present.
• Display a framed picture or portrait: Hire an artist to create a portrait of your loved one, or choose a favourite photo to have specially framed for the occasion.
• Add a hidden patch to your attire: Use a piece of fabric that reminds you of your loved one, such as a patch made from a parent's shirt.
• In Memoriam Table: Create a special table at the reception with framed photos of your loved ones, grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles or others who have passed away. You can also include a memory box where guests can write down and share their favourite memories.
• Play a special song: Pick a tune that holds meaning, like a song you'd always sing together or dance to at home.

Honouring divorced parents

Divorced Parents, Not Remarried:

If your parents are divorced and not remarried, the mother's name is always listed first, followed by the father's name on a separate line with no "and" between them. Using "Ms." is recommended to eliminate any confusion. Here's an example:

> Ms. Sarah Smith

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Divorced Parents, Woman Remarried:

If your mother has remarried and has a different last name, it is appropriate to include her new last name to prevent confusion. The father's name should still be on a separate line. Here's how it could look:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Divorced Parents, Both Remarried:

When both parents are remarried, include their new last names to avoid any confusion. Keep the names on separate lines without an "and" between them. Here's an example:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Divorced and Remarried Parents with Different Last Names:

If your remarried mother has chosen to keep her maiden name or has a different last name than her new spouse, include her name followed by her spouse's name on the same line. The father's name, whether remarried or not, should still be on a separate line. For example:

> Ms. Sarah Smith

> Mr. and Mrs. Roger Inman

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

General Tips:

• Avoid using nicknames and abbreviations for names. Spell out full names, including middle names for the bride and groom.
• If your parents have contributed financially or played a significant role in your life, consider including their names even if they are divorced.
• When in doubt, opt for simplicity and consider using "Together with their families" to include everyone without cluttering the invitation.

The bride's parents hosting

When the bride's parents are hosting the wedding, their names should be included at the top of the invitation. This is true even for very formal affairs. Here are some examples of how to word your wedding invitations in this case:

Formal Wording

• "Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their son Jack Alexander to Mason Jacob Kim Saturday, the seventeenth of August two thousand twenty-four at half after four at [venue name and address] Reception to follow."
• "Marcus and Liza Cannon request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter on Saturday, the twelfth of September two thousand twenty-seven at five o'clock in the evening."
• "Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Timothy Williams request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Brady Christopher Ziegler on Saturday, the twelfth of September two thousand twenty-six at six o'clock in the evening."

Informal Wording

• "John and Eliza Smith invite you to share in their joy at the marriage of their son Jack Alexander to Mason Kim Saturday, August 17, 2024 at 4:30 in the afternoon at [venue name and address] Reception to follow."
• "Samuel and Mindy Peters and the families and friends of Matthew John Masterson invite you to the ceremony and celebration on Saturday, the twelfth of September two thousand twenty-seven at three o'clock in the afternoon."
• "John and Betty Smith invite you to raise a glass at the marriage of their son Jack Alexander to Mason Jacob Kim Saturday, August 17, 2024 at 4:30 in the afternoon at [venue name and address] Dinner and dancing to follow."

Religious Wording

• "Our joy will be more complete if you can share in the marriage of our daughter, Sara Marie, to Troy Higgens Clark on Saturday, the twelfth of September two thousand twenty-seven at six o'clock in the evening. Join us to worship with us and witness their vows."
• "Jonathan and Emma Neilson request your presence as they celebrate the marriage of their daughter on Saturday, the twelfth of September, two thousand twenty-seven, at six o'clock in the evening."

The couple hosting

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, the host line can be skipped altogether. However, if both sets of parents are contributing financially, you can opt for something like, "Together with their parents" or "Together with our families".

• "Together with full hearts, [Bride] and [Groom] invite you to share in their joy as they exchange marriage vows on [date] at [time] at [location]."
• "With hearts full of love and joy, [Bride] and [Groom] request the honour of your presence at their wedding on [date] at [time] at [location]."
• "Together with their families, [Bride] and [Groom] invite you to share in their joy as they exchange marriage vows on [date] at [time] at [location]."
• "Together with our families, [Bride] and [Groom] request the honour of your presence at their wedding on [date] at [time] at [location]."
• "Together with their parents, [Bride] and [Groom] invite you to join them as they exchange marriage vows and celebrate over dinner and dancing on [date] at [time] at [location]."
• "Together with their parents, [Bride] and [Groom] request the pleasure of your company at their wedding on [date] at [time] at [location]."

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, the invitation can begin with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as:

• "Together with full hearts..."
• "With hearts full of love and joy..."

The Request to Attend

There are many ways to ask for the pleasure of your guests' company. Here are a few options:

• "The pleasure of your company is requested."
• "At the marriage of their children."
• "Would love for you to join them."
• "Invite you to celebrate with them."
• "The honour/honor of your presence."

The British spelling of "honour" traditionally indicates that the ceremony will be held in a church or another house of worship.

The Couple's Names

If their names haven't been included in the host line, the couple's names should still take centre stage a few lines down. No one would forget to add this to a wedding invitation! Traditionally, the name of the bride always precedes the groom's name. However, for same-sex couples, this traditional rule doesn't apply. Whether it's "Emily and Zara" or "Zara and Emily," it's entirely up to the couple. When writing their names, same-sex couples can choose to go in alphabetical order or simply use what sounds better.

For formal weddings, everything is written out in full (no numerals). The year is optional, as it is assumed that the wedding is on the nearest such date. Time of day is usually spelled out using "o'clock" or "half after five o'clock." The use of a.m. or p.m. is optional. For casual weddings, numerals are fine.

Frequently asked questions