Positioning Your Wedding Party: Bridesmaids And Groomsmen

Deciding on the positioning of bridesmaids and groomsmen is a key part of wedding planning. While there is no right answer, it's important to consider both the feelings of your wedding party and the aesthetics of the ceremony. One of the simplest ways to arrange your bridal party is by height, with the shortest person standing closest to the altar and the tallest furthest away. This avoids any potential hurt feelings and creates a pleasing look for photographs. Alternatively, you can arrange your wedding party by their relationship to you, the couple. This can be a sensitive option, so it's important to carefully consider the feelings of your friends and family. Another option is to pair up your bridesmaids and groomsmen, starting with the maid of honour and best man, and then pairing by height, personality or how well people know each other.

By height

One of the most challenging aspects of planning a wedding ceremony is figuring out the order of the bridesmaids and groomsmen. The number of attendants in the wedding party can complicate things further. However, arranging the bridal party by height is a simple and effective way to ensure everyone is included without causing any potential hurt feelings.

The first step is to decide whether to arrange the bridal party from shortest to tallest or vice versa. The shortest person will stand closest to the altar, with the tallest person farthest away. The exception to this rule is the maid of honour and best man, who should stand directly next to the bride and groom, regardless of their height.

Pairing up the bridesmaids and groomsmen by height can also create a balanced and aesthetically pleasing look for the processional and recessional, as well as wedding photos. The shortest couple walks down the aisle first, and the tallest couple last. This pairing can also be applied when the bridal party is standing at the altar, with the shortest pairs positioned closest to the couple and the tallest pairs farthest away.

Arranging the bridal party by height is a straightforward way to organise the wedding party and can be easily adapted to include the maid of honour and best man in positions of honour closest to the couple.

By relationship to the couple

Bridesmaids and groomsmen are traditionally chosen from the couple's closest friends and family. This can include siblings, cousins, childhood friends, roommates, and co-workers. If the couple has a large number of people they would like to include, they can consider alternative roles such as ushers, ceremony readers, or escorts.

When choosing your bridal party, it is important to consider the personalities of your friends and how they will get along with each other. It is also a good idea to choose people who are reliable and will be able to help with the wedding planning and participate in the various events leading up to the wedding, such as the bachelorette and bachelor parties.

If a bridesmaid and groomsman are in a relationship with each other, it is customary to pair them together during the processional and recessional, as well as for wedding photos. This can also apply to bridesmaids and groomsmen who are friends, allowing them to hang out together during the wedding.

The couple should also be mindful of their friends' budgets when asking them to be in the wedding party. Being a bridesmaid or groomsman can be expensive, and the couple may need to discuss alternative ways for their friends to be involved if they are unable to afford the typical expenses.

Finally, the couple may want to consider the heights of their bridesmaids and groomsmen when pairing them together. While it is not necessary to have an equal number of attendants or to pair them up one-to-one, having the tallest bridesmaid walk with the tallest groomsman, and the shortest couple walk first, can create a visually pleasing and balanced look for the processional and recessional.

By length of friendship

When it comes to lining up your bridesmaids and groomsmen, there are a few options to consider. One idea is to arrange them by the length of friendship, with the longest friendships closest to the altar and the most recent friends on the outer edges. This can be a diplomatic way to organise your wedding party and prevent any hurt feelings.

However, it is important to note that this approach may still cause some sensitivity, as those standing on the outer edges may feel slighted. To avoid any potential issues, it may be best to tread lightly and consider other factors such as the couple's relationship with each individual and the level of involvement you want them to have in the wedding.

If you have a large wedding party, you could pair up your bridesmaids and groomsmen based on the length of friendship. For example, the bridesmaid you've known the longest could be paired with the groomsman your partner has known the longest. This can add a thoughtful touch to the proceedings and create a sense of balance.

Another suggestion is to focus on dependability, longevity, and supportiveness when choosing your bridesmaids and groomsmen. Opt for individuals you can depend on, who have been by your side for a long time, and who will bring good vibes and emotional support. This ensures that those standing with you on your big day are truly the right people, regardless of the length of your friendship.

Finally, don't be afraid to get creative with your bridal party lineup. If you have an uneven number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, you can still make it work. Consider having each groomsman walk with two bridesmaids or vice versa, depending on your numbers. Alternatively, have the wedding party enter separately, with the groomsmen entering from the side and the bridesmaids walking down the aisle. You could also have each member of the bridal party walk down the aisle individually, creating a quick and lively pace.

By role

The positioning of bridesmaids and groomsmen can be done in several ways, depending on the couple's preferences and the dynamics of the wedding party. Here is a detailed description of the different approaches:

By Height:

The easiest and most aesthetically pleasing option is to line up the bridesmaids and groomsmen by height, with the shortest individuals closest to the altar and the tallest ones farthest away. This option avoids any hurt feelings and ensures a visually pleasing arrangement for photographs. The maid of honour and best man, however, should stand directly next to the bride and groom, regardless of their height.

By Closeness:

This option involves arranging the bridesmaids and groomsmen based on how close they are to the bride and groom. It usually starts with the maid of honour, followed by the sister or sister-in-law, and then progresses through the bride's closest friends and family members. However, caution should be exercised as those placed towards the end of the line-up may feel slighted.

By Length of Friendship:

Arranging the wedding party by the length of friendship with the bride and groom is another diplomatic option. The longest friendships are positioned closest to the bride and groom, with the newest friends on the outer edge of the arrangement.

By Age:

This approach involves placing the oldest bridesmaid or groomsman closest to the couple, with the youngest on the outer edge. However, this may not always be feasible, especially if the wedding party members are of similar ages.

Blended Arrangement:

For couples with uneven wedding parties or a large number of attendants, a blended arrangement can be more visually interesting. Instead of the traditional "his side, her side" separation, the bridesmaids and groomsmen can blend together on both sides of the altar. This can be made even more fun by replacing the traditional standing arrangement with lounge furniture, transforming the ceremony into a high-fashion photoshoot.

Pairing Options:

When it comes to pairing up a bridesmaid with a groomsman for the processional, recessional, reception entrance, and wedding photos, there are a few options:

• Real-life coupling or friendship: If a bridesmaid and groomsman are dating, engaged, married, or friends, it is customary to pair them together.
• Personality: Pairing an extroverted bridesmaid with an outgoing groomsman, for example, can create a harmonious dynamic for the wedding proceedings.
• Height: Matching the tallest bridesmaid with the tallest groomsman, and so on, creates an aesthetically pleasing visual for photographs.
• Length of friendship or role: Pairing the bridesmaid known the longest with the groomsman known the longest by the couple can be a thoughtful touch. This can also include pairing the maid of honour with the best man.

Ultimately, the positioning of the bridesmaids and groomsmen is a personal choice and can be tailored to the couple's preferences and the dynamics of their wedding party.

By personality

When pairing up bridesmaids and groomsmen, you can group them by personality. Think about who would get along with whom. For example, matching an extroverted bridesmaid with an outgoing groomsman will ensure they are glad to be in each other's company during the wedding.

If a bridesmaid and groomsman are dating, engaged, or married, it is customary to pair them up. Similarly, if some of the bridesmaids and groomsmen are friends, let them hang out together.

Frequently asked questions