Choosing Your Bridesmaids: A Guide To Ordering Your Squad

Deciding how to order your bridesmaids can be a tricky part of wedding planning. The order of bridesmaids can affect the aesthetics of the ceremony and the feelings of those involved. There is no right answer for how to order bridesmaids, but there are several popular options to consider. One option is to order bridesmaids by height, which is aesthetically pleasing and avoids any potential hurt feelings. Another option is to order bridesmaids by their relationship to the bride, starting with sisters, then sisters-in-law, cousins, and best friends. This option can be tricky and may result in hurt feelings if not handled carefully. Ordering bridesmaids by the length of their relationship with the bride is another popular option, as it is more objective and avoids hurt feelings. Bridesmaids can also be ordered alphabetically, by dress colour, or by their role in the ceremony. Ultimately, the order of bridesmaids is a personal choice and there are many ways to arrange them to ensure everyone feels included and valued.

By height

Ordering your bridesmaids by height is a great way to avoid any hurt feelings and create a pleasing aesthetic. It is also a simple way to organise your bridal party, as it is an objective criterion.

The first thing to consider is whether you want to order your bridesmaids from shortest to tallest or vice versa. One suggestion is to work off the height of the Maid of Honour and go from there. If she is short, order the bridesmaids from shortest to tallest, and if she is tall, do the opposite. The Maid of Honour will stand closest to the bride, with the rest of the bridesmaids lined up in height order. This way, the bride can be assured of a varied height lineup, with no two bridesmaids of a similar height standing next to each other.

Another option is to have the shortest bridesmaid closest to the altar, with the rest of the bridesmaids in descending height order, excluding the Maid of Honour, who will stand next to the bride. This option is said to be aesthetically pleasing and is a good choice if you are concerned about how the photos will look.

You could also pair the bridesmaids with groomsmen of a similar height. This will create balance in the photos, with the shortest couple walking down the aisle first and the tallest couple going last.

Remember, the most important thing is that your bridal party knows that they are all important to you and that their position in the lineup has no bearing on their relationship with the bride.

By relationship to the bride

When it comes to deciding on your bridesmaids, it's a good idea to consider your closest relationships and who you want to honour with this special role. Here is a guide to help you decide on the order of your bridesmaids, based on their relationship to you:

Sisters: If you have sisters, they are the obvious choice for your chief bridesmaids or maids of honour. They are your family, and likely your closest confidantes, so giving them this role is a wonderful way to honour your bond. If you have more than one sister, decide on the order between them – this could be based on age, with the eldest taking precedence, or perhaps you have a closer relationship with one sister over another.

Cousins and Close Family: Your next consideration could be cousins or other close family members. If you have a large family, you may want to include several cousins or even second cousins. Again, consider the order here – perhaps you have a cousin who is like a sister to you, or maybe there is a family tradition where older cousins take precedence.

Childhood Friends: Your friends are a vital part of your wedding, and your bridesmaids should include your closest companions. If you have friends from childhood, they will be a wonderful addition to your bridal party. These friends have likely seen you through thick and thin, and they will be honoured to stand by your side on your special day. Consider the order here based on the closeness of these friendships and how long you've known each friend.

Newer Friends: Don't forget your more recently made friends! These friends may have come into your life later, but they still hold a special place in your heart. Include them in your bridal party to represent your present and future, as well as your past.

Remember, there are no hard and fast rules when it comes to choosing your bridesmaids. The most important thing is to select people who you love and who love you back. Your bridal party should be a reflection of your happiest relationships, so choose based on what feels right for you!

By length of friendship

Ordering your bridesmaids by the length of your friendship is a great way to avoid hurt feelings and keep things diplomatic. This method is based on facts, as the date you met someone can't be negotiated. It's also a good way to ensure your oldest friends feel extra special and valued.

If you have a mix of friends from different stages of your life, this is a foolproof way to order your bridesmaids. It can be a good idea to put your maid of honour at the front of the line-up, closest to you, with the rest of your bridesmaids lined up from the longest to the shortest friendship. This way, your maid of honour still stands out as your right-hand woman, and your oldest friends are given a place of honour.

You could also consider ordering your bridesmaids by the depth of your friendship, rather than the length. This way, you can choose the friends with whom you have the deepest, most meaningful connection, even if they are newer relationships. This is a good option if you have a newer friend who you feel very close to, and you want them to be a big part of your wedding.

However, if you are concerned about any of your bridesmaids' feelings, you could always mix up the order. There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to the order of your bridesmaids, and you can do things your own way. You could ask your wedding planner or officiant for their ideas, or you could order your bridesmaids by height, which is another way to avoid any potential hurt feelings.

By dress colour

When it comes to ordering your bridesmaids by dress colour, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, consider the time of year and season when choosing a colour palette. For example, reds, golds, emerald greens, and royal blues are perfect for winter weddings, while pastel colours are ideal for spring and summer celebrations. The flowers that are in season will also play a part, as these are likely to be in the bridal bouquets.

Next, you'll want to think about the different skin tones and complexions of your bridesmaids. Not everyone will look great in pastel or jewel tones, so it's important to find a colour that suits everyone. One way to do this is to choose a colour but use different tints and shades to complement individual skin tones. Alternatively, opt for a universally flattering colour such as dark teal or maroon.

The formality of your wedding should also be considered when choosing a colour for your bridesmaids' dresses. Are you going for a boho-chic vibe, or a black-tie reception? The venue and your own wedding dress should help guide this decision. For a beach wedding, for example, you might want to choose breezy chiffon dresses for your bridesmaids, while a black-tie event calls for sequin dresses or fully beaded gowns.

Finally, don't forget to think about the overall aesthetic and theme of your wedding. If you're going for a vintage chic or art deco theme, for instance, this will influence your colour choices. A boho-chic wedding might feature warm colours like rust, brown, and burgundy, while a city rooftop celebration could be the perfect opportunity to showcase Kelly green or royal blue.

Remember, it's important to give your bridesmaids enough time to order their dresses, especially if they need alterations. A good rule of thumb is to allow at least six months before the wedding for dress orders, with alterations taking place closer to the big day.

By role in the ceremony

When it comes to ordering your bridesmaids, there are a few different options to choose from. Here are some ideas for ordering your bridesmaids based on their role in the ceremony:

By Level of Honour

The spot at the front of the line, closest to the couple, is typically reserved for the maid of honour or matron of honour, with the best man on the other side. The spot furthest away is usually considered "least important". However, it's important to remember that standing at the altar is an honour in itself, and your bridesmaids should be happy to stand wherever you need them to.

By Height

Ordering your bridesmaids by height can be a good way to avoid any hurt feelings and create an aesthetically pleasing look for your wedding photos. Simply line up your bridesmaids from shortest to tallest or vice versa, with the exception of the maid of honour, who should stand next to the bride.

By Relationship to the Couple

Ordering your bridesmaids based on their relationship to the couple can be a bit tricky, as you don't want anyone to feel hurt or slighted. A typical order might start with the maid of honour, followed by the sister or sister-in-law, and then followed by best friends, cousins, or other close friends.

By Length of Friendship

Ordering your bridesmaids based on how long you've known them can be a diplomatic way to avoid hurt feelings. Line up your bridesmaids from the longest to shortest friendship, with the newest friends on the outer edge of the arrangement.

By Age

Ordering your bridesmaids from oldest to youngest is another good option, as age is something that can't be negotiated. The oldest bridesmaid can stand closest to the couple, with the youngest on the outer edge.

Frequently asked questions