Planning a destination wedding or party is an exciting task, but it can be challenging to know how to invite your guests. The key is to provide your guests with enough information to plan their trip while keeping the invitation simple and exciting. Here are some tips to help you craft the perfect invitation:
Timing:
Give your guests ample time to prepare by sending out save the dates around 9-12 months in advance, especially for a destination wedding. This will allow your guests to budget and make travel arrangements. The formal invitations can be sent out 4-6 months before the event.
What to Include:
The invitation should include essential details such as the names of the couple, destination, date, time, and location, and RSVP date and method. You may also want to include accommodation and travel information, such as nearby airports and accommodation options. If you have a wedding website, include the link so guests can find more detailed information.
Setting the Tone:
The wording of your invitation should reflect the spirit of your event. Use language that excites your guests and conveys the sense of anticipation and joy they will feel when joining you on this journey. Be creative and use wording that captures the essence of your chosen destination and wedding style.
Extras:
Consider including a separate insert or card with travel tips, local attractions, and itinerary details. This will provide your guests with additional useful information without cluttering the invitation itself. Also, be clear about whether children are invited or if it is an adults-only event.
Remember, your invitation is the first glimpse your guests will have into your special day, so take the time to make it informative and reflective of your celebration. Happy planning!
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Timing | Send invitations early, ideally 9-12 months in advance, to allow guests to budget and make arrangements. |
Location | Include the city, state or country where the wedding will be hosted. |
RSVP | Provide an RSVP deadline to help finalise numbers and plans. |
Website | Include a link to a wedding website with further details on travel, accommodation, itinerary and local activities. |
Itinerary | Outline any additional events, such as a welcome dinner or recovery lunch, and provide a schedule for guests. |
Attire | Advise guests on the dress code, especially if the wedding has a specific theme. |
Gifts | Due to costs involved, it is considered poor etiquette to include gift registry details. |
Plus ones | Be generous with plus ones, especially for guests who may not know anyone else. |
Children | Make it clear whether children are invited or not. |
What You'll Learn
How to decide who to invite to your destination wedding
Deciding on a guest list for your wedding can be a challenging task, especially if you're planning a destination wedding. Here are some tips to help you decide who to invite:
Consider your budget and venue:
Start by creating a budget for your wedding and researching potential venues. The cost of hosting a destination wedding can vary depending on the location and the number of guests. Consider how many people you can afford to accommodate and whether the venue can comfortably accommodate your guest list.
Prioritize close friends and family:
When deciding who to invite, start with your closest friends and family members. These are the people who have been a consistent presence in your life and will likely continue to be in the future. Consider creating a document titled "I Am So Excited to Have These People at Our Wedding" and list the names of those who come to mind first.
Evaluate recent connections:
In addition to close friends and family, consider inviting people you have regular contact with. Look through your phone or social media to identify those you text or hang out with often. These could be friends you regularly meet for coffee, go on vacations with, or have frequent video calls with despite the distance.
Be mindful of plus-ones:
When it comes to plus-ones, it is generally recommended to invite guests' significant others, even if they are not married or engaged. However, for single guests, you can be more discretionary. You may choose to allow plus-ones for those who don't know anyone else at the wedding or those who would feel more comfortable with a date.
Decide on children:
Whether or not to invite children to your wedding is a personal decision. If you have children in your life whom you adore and want to be part of your day, by all means, include them! However, if your vision for the wedding is an adult-only affair, that is also perfectly acceptable. Just be sure to clearly communicate your decision on the invitations to avoid any confusion.
Manage parental input:
If your parents or in-laws are contributing financially to the wedding, they may want to have a say in the guest list. One approach is to divide your target guest count into thirds, allowing each set of parents to invite a certain number of guests, while the remaining third is for the couple's friends and mutual loved ones.
Create a "must-have" list:
Consider creating a "must-have" list of people you can't imagine getting married without. This list may include your closest family members, best friends, or individuals who have played a significant role in your life. Ensure these people are at the top of your guest list.
Be selective with acquaintances:
When it comes to acquaintances, be selective. You don't need to invite everyone you've ever met. Consider inviting only those acquaintances with whom you have a genuine connection and ongoing relationship. This could include family friends you remain in touch with or neighbours you regularly spend time with.
Give ample notice:
As a destination wedding requires a greater investment of time and money from your guests, it is essential to give them ample notice. Send out "Save the Dates" at least six months in advance, and ideally, provide a year's notice if possible. This will allow your guests to plan their travel and ensure they can take the necessary time off work.
Expect some rejections:
Even with ample notice, expect to receive some rejections. People have busy lives and other commitments, so don't take it personally if some of your desired guests are unable to attend. It's also a good idea to have a "B-list" of guests you can invite if some of your initial invitees decline.
Remember, your wedding day is about celebrating your love with the people who matter most to you. Choose guests who will bring you joy and create a positive atmosphere on your special day.
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How to give your guests enough notice
Planning a wedding is an exciting time, but it can be a challenge to ensure your guests have enough notice, especially when you're asking them to travel. Here are some tips to make sure your guests have ample time to prepare for your big day:
Send Save-the-Dates Early
It is recommended to send out your Save-the-Dates around 9-12 months before a destination wedding. This will give your guests enough time to budget and make arrangements for travel and accommodation. It's also a good idea to include essential details such as the destination, wedding date, and your wedding website link if you have one.
Communicate Important Dates
Make sure your guests are aware of any other important dates, such as the RSVP deadline and the dates of any additional events you're hosting, like a welcome dinner or recovery lunch. This will help them plan their trip effectively and ensure they don't miss out on any of the festivities.
Provide Travel and Accommodation Tips
Your guests will appreciate any guidance you can offer on travel and accommodation. Share room block information, transportation details, and recommendations for local restaurants and attractions. This can be done via your wedding website or as an insert with the invitations. The more information you can provide, the easier it will be for your guests to make their plans.
Be Considerate of Guests' Circumstances
Remember that attending a destination wedding requires a significant investment of time and money from your guests. Be understanding if some guests are unable to attend due to financial constraints, work commitments, or other factors. You can include a note on your wedding website assuring guests that their presence is enough of a gift, and that you understand if they are unable to attend.
Keep Communication Open
Finally, maintain open lines of communication with your guests. If you have a wedding party or key players in your wedding, confirm their availability before finalizing dates. Be responsive to any questions or concerns your guests may have, and don't be afraid to reach out to guests who haven't responded to your RSVP by the deadline.
By following these suggestions, you'll be able to give your guests ample notice and ensure they have the information they need to confidently plan their attendance at your destination wedding.
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What to include in your invitations
Destination wedding invitations should be concise yet comprehensive. Here is a breakdown of what to include:
Names
Naturally, your names as the couple taking centre stage.
Destination
For a wedding abroad, make it clear that your wedding is overseas and specify where. You can include the country and city or town, and if you want to go the extra mile, put a map on there, too.
Date, Time, and Location
These are the core details that your guests need to plan their attendance and RSVP to.
Accommodation and Travel Information
Provide options for where your guests can stay. This is especially important for destination weddings, as guests may need to book accommodation early. If your celebration lasts multiple nights, make sure your guests know this, too. You can also include information on the nearest airport and how far it is.
Itinerary and Activities
For a multi-day celebration, outline the events and activities your guests can look forward to. This could include a pool party, after-party activities, a boat trip, or horse riding.
RSVP Deadline
Knowing who is attending well in advance helps you finalise numbers, table plans, and everything else, so setting a deadline or guide for your guests to respond helps them decide if they can attend.
Attire
Depending on your wedding location, theme, and style, a dress code or attire advice is useful for guests. Let your guests know so they can plan and pack appropriately.
Packing Essentials
If you're planning a pool party, themed welcome party, boat party, or going trekking, let your guests know so they can pack what's needed, such as swimwear, sunscreen, or hiking boots.
Wedding Website
If there is too much information to include on your invites, set up a wedding website that can include more detailed information, links to hotels, a full itinerary, and details about your wedding, welcome party, and after-party.
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How to address the issue of children or adults-only
Deciding whether to invite children or make your wedding adults-only is a tricky decision, and one that requires careful consideration. Here are some tips to help you address this issue:
Be Clear and Consistent
It's important to be clear and consistent with your guests about your adults-only policy. This starts with how you address your save-the-dates and invitations. Only include the names of the guests who are invited on the envelope. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Luis Chavez", not "The Chavez Family". If you have inner and outer envelopes, the outer envelope features the guest's mailing address, while the inner envelope includes the title and last name of each invited guest. This makes it clear from the start that your wedding is for adults only.
Use Subtle Wording
While it's generally not recommended to explicitly state "adults only" or "no children" on the invitation itself, you can use subtle wording to convey the message. For example, phrases like "intimate ceremony" or "cocktail reception" held at a "luxury hotel" or "downtown nightclub" can suggest a child-free event as these venues are typically not suitable for children. You can also add a note on the reception card or map, such as "Leave the kiddos at home. While we adore your children, our venue does not have the room for your little ones. Please make it a date night. We can't wait to celebrate with you!".
Specify Age Restrictions
It's important to be specific about which age groups cannot attend. For example, you could say, "We'd prefer to keep our big day for adults only as it will run late into the evening". You could also state that you are unable to accommodate guests under a certain age, such as "We politely request no children under 18 attend the ceremony and reception".
Make it About the Venue
If you're more comfortable, you can blame the venue for your adults-only policy. For example, "Due to restrictions at our venue, we cannot accommodate children" or "Our venue has a strict no-under-18s policy, so we are unable to welcome children to the wedding".
Be Upfront on Your Wedding Website
Most couples have a wedding website with a comprehensive list of details for their big day. Include an FAQ page and address the question, "Can we bring kids?". Clearly state that while you love children, you want your guests to be able to relax and enjoy themselves without worrying about their little ones. You could also include information for a local babysitting agency or service.
Inform Your Close Circle
Tell your immediate family members, wedding party, and other close friends and relatives about your adults-only policy so they can help answer questions from other guests.
Be Sensitive but Firm
Expect some guests to be confused or even upset about your adults-only policy. Be sensitive to their concerns but remain firm in your decision. If someone is agitated or upset, politely say something like, "I'm very sorry, but we can't make any exceptions. We still hope you'll join us".
Help Guests with Childcare
It's a kind gesture to help your guests find childcare solutions. Ask your networks for babysitter recommendations or, if your budget allows, hire a babysitting service to watch the children in a separate room at your venue or hotel.
Remember, it's your wedding day, and you get to decide who's invited. As long as you're clear, consistent, and sensitive in your approach, you can navigate this tricky issue with grace and ease.
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How to indicate you want no gifts
There are several ways to indicate that you would like no gifts for your wedding. Here is some advice on how to communicate this to your guests:
Use Your Wedding Website
Use your wedding website to inform guests that presents are not required. You can include a short reason why gifts are not needed, or highlight any cash funds you have linked, such as a honeymoon fund.
Include a Note on Your Wedding Invitations
Although it is generally advised not to mention gifts on your wedding invitations, you can include an insert with your invitation suite that politely requests no gifts. You could write something like:
> Your presence is your present. Please, no gifts.
> We are sending out this invitation in hope that you will join our celebration. But if a gift is your intention, we would like to mention that we have everything we need. So, instead, we would appreciate a contribution to our honeymoon fund.
Spread the Word in Person
Use word-of-mouth to inform your guests about your no-gifts preference. Mention this while socialising with your guests at your engagement party, or on the phone with friends and family. You can also ask your wedding party (bridesmaids, groomsmen, etc.) to help spread the word.
Suggest Alternative Ways to Give
Even if you don't want any physical gifts or cash, some guests will still want to give something. You can recommend alternatives, such as contributions to a honeymoon or house fund, or donations to a charitable fund. You could say:
> We are honoured to have a home together already, so we kindly request no boxed gifts. However, if you wish to mark the occasion, we would be grateful for a small contribution to our honeymoon fund.
> In lieu of gifts, please consider making a donation to [charity name].
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Frequently asked questions
It is recommended to give your guests as much notice as possible, with couples planning a destination wedding giving their guests around 9-12 months' advance notice. This allows your guests to thoroughly check their travel budgets, confirm if they can get time off work and research if they want to extend their holiday.
Your wedding invitations should include the following essential details: the wedding date and time, the location, the RSVP date and method, and your wedding website link. On your wedding website, you can include travel and accommodation tips, additional events, and a local map/itinerary.
The easiest option is to carry your attire in a garment bag as your carry-on. Ask a flight attendant if it's possible to hang the garment bag in the hanging space for first class or lay it on top of the suitcases after they've been stowed. If the fabric isn't prone to wrinkling, you can carefully fold it and pack it into your carry-on suitcase.
While you are only obligated to pay for food served during the wedding festivities, it is considerate to pay for at least one additional meal if your guests are joining you for more than three days.