Lyla Dejesus
Wedding showers are typically smaller and more intimate than the wedding itself, so it's best to keep the guest list limited to close friends and family. While it's important to include the bride's nearest and dearest, it's also customary to invite close female relatives and friends of the groom's side of the family. The bride's future mother-in-law, sisters, aunts, cousins and even bridesmen may be included. It's also worth noting that anyone invited to the wedding shower should also be invited to the wedding, and vice versa.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Number of Guests | Depends on the venue and budget; between 30 and 40 is a good number |
| Guest List | Close female friends and family members, bridesmaids, mother, sisters, future in-laws, close male friends or relatives |
| Inviting Out-of-Town Guests | Give them plenty of notice |
| Timing of Invites | 6-8 weeks before the event |
| Information on the Invite | Bride's name, date and time, venue address, RSVP details, registry information, theme, dress code |
What You'll Learn
Who to invite to a wedding shower
Wedding showers are typically smaller and more intimate than the wedding ceremony, so it's common to only invite close friends and family members to the event. The guest list usually includes the bride's closest female friends and relatives, such as her bridesmaids, mother, sisters, and future in-laws. However, in recent times, bridal showers can also include close male friends or relatives if the bride wishes.
If you're having a joint wedding shower, both sides of the family and both sets of family friends should be invited. This includes siblings, cousins, and grandparents. The wedding party should also be invited, and it's important to send out physical invites even if they are involved in the planning.
The bride's friends should be prioritised on the guest list, including the bridesmaids and any close friends who are not part of the wedding party. If you have close co-workers, you can include them as well, but you're not obligated to invite all your colleagues.
It's important to note that you shouldn't invite anyone to the wedding shower if they're not also invited to the wedding. The only exception is for those who are invited to the wedding but cannot attend; including them in the bridal shower invitation allows them to partake in the celebration even if they can't make it on the big day.
Ultimately, the wedding party host decides on the guest list, but the couple's input is necessary to ensure everyone on the list will be invited to the wedding as well.
Etiquette Guide: Inviting Guests to Wedding Ceremony Only
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How many to invite
When it comes to deciding how many people to invite to a wedding shower, it's important to keep in mind that these events are typically more intimate than the wedding itself. The number of guests will depend on various factors, such as the venue capacity, budget, and the bride's preferences.
Firstly, consult with the bride-to-be about how many guests she would like to attend. Ask her for a list of "must-have" guests, ensuring that her closest friends and family are included. This conversation is also an opportunity to discuss any venue constraints and budget limitations that may impact the guest count.
For a traditional bridal shower, the guest list usually includes the bride's closest female friends and family members, such as her bridesmaids, mother, sisters, and future in-laws. However, modern bridal showers can also include close male friends or relatives if the bride wishes. The key is to invite people who are genuinely close to the bride and have a meaningful connection with her.
The host of the bridal shower, typically the maid of honour or bridal party, will also have a say in the final guest list. If someone else is paying for the bridal shower, be sure to check with them as well, as they may have budget or space constraints in mind.
While there is no exact number for how many people to invite, a range of 30 to 40 people is often considered a good sweet spot, keeping in mind that some invitees may not be able to attend. If the guest list is starting to feel long, consider hosting multiple, smaller bridal showers to accommodate different groups of guests.
When to send invites
When it comes to sending out invites for a wedding shower, timing is crucial to ensure that all the guests can attend. Here are some guidelines to help you plan:
Local Guests
If most of your guests are local, it is recommended to send out invitations four to six weeks before the event. This gives them enough time to plan their schedules and avoid any potential conflicts. It's also a good idea to include an RSVP deadline on the invitation, usually set for two weeks before the event, to help with your planning.
Out-of-Town Guests
For guests travelling from out of town, it is considerate to give them more advance notice. Sending invitations six to eight weeks ahead will allow them to make the necessary travel and accommodation arrangements. If your guest list includes people from far away, consider sending a save the date notice or message, especially if your event falls during busy holiday seasons. This will ensure they can plan their trips without clashing with other commitments.
Timing Considerations
The timing of the wedding shower itself is also important. It is recommended to hold the shower anywhere from two weeks to two months before the wedding, so it doesn't interfere with the couple's plans and other wedding-related events. This timing also applies if you're sending paper or electronic invitations, though paper invites may require a little more time for designing and printing.
RSVP Management
When asking for RSVPs, consider the catering requirements for your event. If catering is needed, request RSVPs around two to two and a half weeks in advance to finalise numbers for the caterers. For a non-catered event, one week's notice is usually sufficient.
Remember, the key to successful wedding shower planning is to give your guests, especially those travelling from out of town, ample time to prepare and attend.
Who sends invites
The party host is responsible for sending out the wedding shower invitations. This is usually one of the older women in the bride's life, such as the mother of the bride, mother-in-law, or maid of honour. However, the couple's input is necessary, and they should be consulted about the guest list before sending out the invites.
If you are the host, you can delegate some of the work to other members of the wedding party. For example, you could put one person in charge of collecting addresses and getting guest list approval, and another person in charge of choosing and sending the invitations.
If you are the couple, it is a good idea to sync up with your shower host ahead of time to make sure you are on the same page.
What to include on invites
The wedding shower invitation should include the bride's name, the date and time of the event, the location (including the exact street address), and RSVP details. It's also proper etiquette to include the name of the guest or guests of honour and the event type, such as "bridal shower" or "wedding shower".
Additionally, you may want to include the host's name and their contact information for RSVPs. This makes it easier for guests to let you know if they can attend. It's also a good idea to include any relevant registry information, as well as information on the theme (if there is one) and any special instructions, such as a dress code.
If you're inviting out-of-town guests, it's a good idea to give them plenty of notice. Sending invitations at least two months in advance should give them enough time to organise travel and accommodations.
Frequently asked questions
Your wedding shower guest list should include your wedding party, close family members, and friends. You can also invite the couple's children, and the closest female relatives and friends of the groom's family.
No, you don't have to invite everyone from your wedding guest list to your wedding shower. It is common to keep the wedding shower more intimate and smaller in scale than the wedding.
Wedding shower invitations should be sent out about four to eight weeks before the event. This gives guests enough time to plan and make travel arrangements if necessary.
The wedding shower invitations should include the date, time, location, and registry information. You can also include the theme, dress code, and special instructions such as a request for guests to bring a recipe card or another item.
