Wedding Invite Etiquette: Timing And Sending Out

Wedding planning involves taking care of a lot of details, and one of the most important is the wedding invitation. It not only announces the upcoming nuptials but also sets the tone for the entire event. The timing of sending out wedding invitations is crucial to ensure that guests have enough time to plan and attend the wedding. So, when is the best time to send out wedding invites?

Send save-the-date cards 4-6 months before the wedding

Save-the-date cards are an exciting part of wedding planning, giving your guests a first glimpse of your wedding theme and colour scheme. They are also a practical way to ensure your guests have plenty of time to prepare for your big day.

Save-the-date cards are not required, but they are a fun and considerate way to ensure your guests can join you. They are especially helpful if you have many out-of-town guests or your wedding is in a far-off destination, as they allow your guests to book travel and accommodation in advance.

It is best to send save-the-date cards four to six months before the wedding. However, if your wedding is in a destination that requires more extensive travel arrangements, it is a good idea to send them even earlier—up to 12 months in advance. This gives your guests ample time to request time off work and make the necessary arrangements to be there.

Sending save-the-date cards early is also a good idea if your wedding falls on a holiday weekend, as your guests may have other plans or commitments. It ensures they can block off the date and plan ahead.

While save-the-date cards are a fun way to give your guests a heads-up, they are not a substitute for the official wedding invitations, which should be sent out later.

Send invites 6-8 weeks before

Sending out your wedding invites in good time is an important part of the planning process. It's all about finding the sweet spot—not too early, and not too late. So, when is the right time?

The general consensus is that wedding invitations should be sent out to guests around six to eight weeks before the wedding. This gives your guests ample time to prepare and plan, especially if they need to book travel and accommodation. It also allows you to get a final headcount and plan your seating chart. Sending invites in this window is a good idea whether you're having a destination wedding or a hometown celebration.

RSVP and Save the Date

The RSVP deadline should be about one month before the wedding. This gives your vendors enough time to prepare supplies and helps with your planning. Save-the-date cards can be sent out much earlier, usually four to six months before the wedding, or even earlier for destination weddings. This gives your guests a heads-up to book time off work and make the necessary arrangements.

What to Include

The invitation should include the full names of the couple and the hosts, the date, time, and location of the wedding. Other details such as a map, accommodation information, and wedding activities can be included in the invitation suite. It's also important to include an RSVP card with a deadline and a self-addressed, stamped envelope.

Send destination wedding invites 3 months before

Planning a destination wedding is exciting, but it requires more organisation than a local wedding. The key to success is giving your guests plenty of notice so they can prepare for their adventure.

Save-the-dates are especially important for destination weddings, as they give your guests the gift of time to research, make travel arrangements, and take leave from work. It's advisable to send save-the-dates for a destination wedding at least 6 months in advance, and up to 8 months or even a year before the big day. This is especially important if you have a lot of guests coming from overseas or far-flung locations.

After the save-the-dates, you'll want to send out your formal wedding invitations. For a destination wedding, it's best to send these out at least 3 months before the wedding, and ideally 12 weeks in advance. This gives your guests ample time to reply, book travel and accommodation, and purchase a gift.

If you're only inviting a few international guests, it's fine to send their formal invitations at the same time as your other guests. However, make sure to give them a heads-up about the wedding details ahead of time, so they can start making their travel arrangements.

• Send save-the-dates early: Aim for 6-8 months in advance, or even a year for a destination wedding.
• Follow up with formal invitations: Send these out 3 months before the wedding, or 12 weeks in advance.
• Give guests a heads-up: If you have international guests, give them a call or send an email with the details so they can start planning their travel.
• Request RSVPs early: Ask for RSVPs no later than 1 month before the wedding, and consider gathering RSVPs within 1-2 months of sending out save-the-dates for better planning.
• Provide detailed information: Include a timeline of events, travel and accommodation details, and any group activities you've planned.
• Use digital formats: Digital save-the-dates and invitations are a cost-effective option, allowing you to allocate more budget to the main event.
• Create a wedding website: This is a great way to share accommodation, transport, activity, and other useful information with your guests.
• Expect earlier RSVPs: For destination weddings, expect RSVPs a little earlier as the venue may need a final count before you arrive.
• Be mindful of your guests: Planning a trip for your wedding involves time and money for your guests, so be respectful and give them enough time to save and make arrangements.
• Keep communication open: If there are still undecided guests, promptly follow up with them to request their response and ensure an accurate headcount.

Include RSVP cards with a deadline of 1 month before

Wedding invitations are typically sent out six to eight weeks before the wedding. This gives guests enough time to clear their schedules and make travel arrangements if needed. It is recommended that the RSVP deadline be set at least two to four weeks before the wedding date to allow enough time for the couple to confirm the final headcount with the caterer and finalise the seating chart. The RSVP deadline should be included on the invitation or on a separate RSVP card.

Including RSVP cards with a deadline of one month before the wedding is a practical way to ensure that you have an accurate guest count well before your big day. This will allow you to finalise the details with your vendors, such as the amount of food and drinks needed and the seating arrangements. Here are some reasons why including RSVP cards with a one-month deadline is beneficial:

• Timely Responses: Asking guests to respond by a specific date encourages them to send their replies promptly. This helps you avoid the stress of chasing down late responses and gives you a clear picture of the attendance closer to the wedding date.
• Vendor Coordination: Having an accurate guest count one month in advance gives you ample time to coordinate with your vendors. You can finalise details such as catering quantities, rental orders, and seating arrangements without last-minute changes.
• Seating Chart: Knowing the number of confirmed guests helps you create a more accurate seating chart. This is especially important if you are assigning specific seats to your guests or if you need to accommodate dietary restrictions or special requests.
• Budget Management: With a clear idea of the guest count, you can better manage your budget. You can finalise costs with your vendors and make any necessary adjustments to stay within your budget.
• Guest Experience: By requesting RSVPs a month in advance, you can enhance the guest experience. You can ensure that everyone's dietary needs are considered, accommodate special requests, and create a more personalised celebration.

When including RSVP cards, it is important to provide guests with multiple response options. While online RSVPs through a wedding website are convenient and cost-effective, offering both digital and paper options ensures that all your guests, especially older loved ones, can respond comfortably.

Finalise seating chart, contact vendors and confirm headcount

Finalising the seating chart, contacting vendors, and confirming the headcount are crucial steps in the wedding planning process. Here is a detailed guide to help you navigate these tasks:

Finalise the Seating Chart:

• Group your guests: Organise your guest list by categorising them into groups such as family, friends from high school or college, work friends, etc. This will help you visualise who already knows each other and gets along.
• Consider ages, interests, and backgrounds: Try to seat people together who share commonalities, such as those with children of a similar age or those who have travelled for the wedding. Be mindful to avoid grouping individuals who you know do not get along.
• Choose table shapes: The standard table shapes to choose from are round, rectangular, oval, and square. Rectangular tables offer more seating capacity and easier conversation across the table, while round tables are traditional and offer more legroom.
• Seat VIPs and special guests: Ensure that your VIP guests, such as parents and grandparents, have the best seats with a clear view of the festivities. Consider seating older guests away from loud music and giving them easier access to the dance floor.
• Handle complex family dynamics: For divorced parents or other complex family situations, consider having two tables of equal proximity to the head table or seating them at opposite ends of a long rectangular table.
• Seat the wedding party together: Honour your wedding party by seating them at a head table with their dates or "hosting" tables with mutual friends. Alternatively, seat them at the third-best tables near the dance floor.
• Seat children together: If you have several children attending, consider a separate kids' table with engaging activities to keep them occupied. Seat younger children close to their parents to avoid anxiety.
• Finalise the seating chart: Once you've arranged your guests, use a digital seating chart tool or a physical poster board to visualise the seating plan. Ensure that each guest has a designated seat and review the chart with your partner, planner, and venue.

Contact Vendors:

• Share the seating chart: Provide a copy of the finalised seating chart to your vendors, including the venue, caterers, and event planners. This will help them with their preparations and ensure a smooth flow during the reception.
• Confirm arrangements: Contact all your vendors to confirm the details of their services, including arrival times, setup requirements, and any special requests. Ensure they have the final headcount and any necessary information to finalise their preparations.

Confirm Headcount:

• Manage RSVPs: Keep track of your RSVPs and follow up with guests who have not responded. Give stragglers a gentle reminder as the deadline approaches.
• Finalise the guest list: Confirm your final guest count, including any late responses or adjustments. Ensure that this number matches the number of assigned seats on your seating chart to avoid last-minute surprises.
• Communicate with vendors: Share the final headcount with all relevant vendors, especially those providing catering, seating, or transportation services. This information is crucial for their final preparations and ensures they can accommodate all your guests.

Frequently asked questions