Writing Wedding Invites: Formality And Etiquette In Few Words

When it comes to wedding invitations, there are many ways to word them depending on the formality of the occasion, who is hosting, and personal preference. The key details to include are the hosts, the couple's names, the ceremony location, and the reception venue. Here is a guide on how to formally write wedding invitations.

The first line of a wedding invitation is usually dedicated to the host of the wedding, also known as the party covering the expenses. Traditionally, this is the bride's parents, but nowadays it could also be the groom's parents, the bride and groom themselves, or a combination of all three. When both sets of parents are hosting, it is common to list the bride's parents' names first, followed by the groom's parents' names. If the couple is hosting, they can choose to include a warm and welcoming introduction or omit the host line altogether.

The next line is the request for attendance, which lets guests know exactly what they are being invited to. This is followed by the names of the couple, usually displayed in larger text or a fancy typeface. For different-sex couples, the bride's name typically comes first, while same-sex couples can choose to list names alphabetically or based on preference.

The date and time of the wedding should be included, with formal invitations spelling these out in full and modern invites using numerical figures. The location of the ceremony and reception should also be specified, with the street address, state, and zip code included. If the reception is at a different location, this can be included on a separate details card.

Including the dress code on the invitation is optional but can be helpful for guests. It is usually mentioned in the lower corner or bottom center of the invite.

The host line: Who is hosting the wedding?

The host line is the first line of a wedding invitation and indicates who is hosting (and traditionally, paying for) the wedding.

Traditional Wording

In the past, the bride's family usually hosted and paid for the wedding, so the host line would begin with "Mr. and Mrs. [Father's First Name] [Bride's Last Name] request the honour of your presence at the wedding of their daughter...".

If the groom's parents were hosting, the format would be: "Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's Father's First Name] [Groom's Last Name] request the honour of your presence...".

Modern Variations

Today, there are many more possibilities, including: the bride's parents hosting, the groom's parents hosting, both sets of parents co-hosting, the bride and groom hosting, or a combination of the couple and their parents hosting together.

Bride's Parents Hosting

• "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Jane Marie to Mr. Jeffrey James Johnson, son of Mr. and Mrs. Jack Johnson..."
• "Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Timothy Williams (very formal; middle name is included)"
• "Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Williams (formal)"
• "Christopher and Sarah Williams (less formal)"

Groom's Parents Hosting

• "Mr. and Mrs. Jack Johnson request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of Jane Marie Smith to Jeffrey James Johnson..."
• "Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Cannon request the honour of your presence..."
• "Matthew & Valentina Cannon (less formal)"

Both Sets of Parents Co-Hosting

• "Mr. and Mrs. Robert Smith and Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Gringo invite you to share in the ceremony uniting their children Francis Christopher Gringo"
• "Kenzie M. Smith and Jennifer L. Smith and Mark Franklin and Mary Elizabeth Reyes request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their children Olivia Rose and John Michael..."
• "Kenzie and Jennifer Smith along with Mark and Sally Reyes invite you to share and celebrate the marriage of their children Olivia Rose and John Michael..."

Couple Hosting

• "Miss Jane Marie Smith and Mr. Jeffrey James Johnson invite you to share in the celebration of their wedding..."
• "Miss Sarah Nichole Williams and Mr. Andrew David Douglas, together with their parents, request the pleasure of your company..."
• "Jack Alexander Smith & Mason Jacob Kim are getting married, Saturday, August 17, 2024, at 4:30 in the afternoon..."

Couple and Their Families Hosting

• "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Mr. and Mrs. Jack Johnson request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their children Jane Marie and Jeffrey James..."
• "Together with their parents, Emma and Jax request the pleasure of your company..."
• "Together with their families, Olivia Rose Smith and John Michael Reyes request the honour of your presence at their wedding..."
• "Together with their families, Jack Smith and Mason Kim invite you to their wedding..."

The attendance request: How to invite guests

The attendance request line is where you extend the invitation to attend your wedding, and you can use it to set the tone for your celebration. Here are some examples of wording for this line:

• "The honour of your presence"
• "The pleasure of your company"
• "Would love for you to join them"
• "Invite you to celebrate with them"
• "Request the honour of your presence"

If the ceremony is taking place in a church or another house of worship, you can use the British spelling "honour" to indicate this.

• "Together with their parents, Emma and Jax request the pleasure of your company..."
• "The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of Jack Alexander Smith to Mason Jacob Kim..."
• "Come party with us! Jack Alexander Smith and Mason Jacob Kim are tying the knot..."
• "Mr. and Mrs. Jon Flores request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Talia Camila Flores to Stephen Anthony Byrne..."
• "Talia Flores and Stephen Byrne invite you to a celebration of their love and commitment..."

The couple's names: Whose wedding is it?

The names of the couple are a crucial element of a wedding invitation. Here are some guidelines and examples to help you with this section of the invitation:

Traditional Wedding Invitation Wording

If you're opting for a traditional or formal wedding invitation, the bride's name typically comes first, followed by the groom's name. For example:

"Stacey Bullington and Peter Cunningham invite you to join them at the celebration of their marriage."

If the bride's parents' names are listed at the top as hosts, the bride's name can be her first and middle name, without the last name. In this case, the groom's name is usually written in full or with his first and middle names followed by "Son of Mr. & Mrs." For instance:

"at the marriage of their daughter Chloe Lewis to James Rosen."

Same-Sex Couples

For same-sex couples, the traditional rule of the woman's name first does not apply. The names can be listed in alphabetical order by last name or based on what looks best with the invitation design. For example:

"Zara and Emily" or "Emily and Zara"

Less Formal Wedding Invitation Wording

If you prefer a less formal tone, you may use only the first names of the couple. This can be a great option for modern or casual wedding invitations. For instance:

"Come party with us, Jack Alexander Smith and Mason Jacob Kim."

Honouring a Deceased Parent

If you want to include the name of a deceased parent, you can honour them alongside the couple's names. Here's an example:

"Lauren Martinez, daughter of Marta Martinez, and Mason Jacob Kim."

Cultural and Religious Considerations

It is important to note that name placement and formatting may vary depending on cultural and religious traditions. Be sure to consider any specific protocols relevant to your background when crafting your invitations.

Date and time: When is the wedding?

When it comes to the date and time of your wedding, there are a few different ways to word this information, depending on the formality of your wedding. Here are some examples to help you craft the perfect invitation:

Formal Wedding Invitation Wording

For a formal wedding invitation, the date and time are traditionally written out in full, rather than using numerals. For example:

> Saturday, the twenty-sixth of October two thousand twenty-four at half after three o'clock in the afternoon

If your wedding is taking place in the evening, you can simply write:

> at seven o'clock in the evening

Or

> at nineteen hundred hours

If your wedding is in the afternoon, you can specify this by writing:

> at half after three o'clock in the afternoon

Informal/Casual Wedding Invitation Wording

For a more casual or informal wedding, you can be a little more relaxed with the wording. You can use a combination of written-out numbers and numerals, or simply use numerals for the date and time. For example:

> Saturday, 26th of October, 2024, 3:30 pm

Or

> Saturday, October 26th, 3:30 pm

Modern Wedding Invitation Wording

If you're opting for a modern invitation style, you can be creative with the wording while still conveying the essential information. Here's an example:

> Join us for an evening of celebration on Saturday, 10.26.24, at 7 pm

Things to Keep in Mind

• The day of the week and the month should be capitalized (unless your wedding invitation's font is all uppercase or lowercase), and there should be a comma between the day of the week and the date.
• The year is usually on a separate line from the day of the week and the month, and there is no hyphen between "two thousand" in the year.
• Formal wedding invitations traditionally say "half after" (not "half past") for times on the half-hour.
• You don't need to specify "in the morning," "in the afternoon," or "in the evening" unless there could be confusion over whether the wedding is in the morning or evening (for example, if it starts at 8, 9, or 10 am/pm).
• Be consistent with the date and time formatting on any enclosures in your wedding invitation suite, such as the response card.

Location: Where is the wedding?

The location of the wedding ceremony and reception is a key piece of information to include in your wedding invitation. Here are some tips and examples to help you provide clear and elegant directions to your celebration:

Venue Name and Address

It is important to include the name of the venue where the wedding will take place. For formal invitations, it is customary to write out the full name and street address of the venue, including the city and state. If your wedding is taking place abroad, be sure to include the country as well. Here's an example:

> The Ritz-Carlton

> 1234 Main Street

> Los Angeles, California

> United States

However, if the venue is well-known or if omitting the address would not cause confusion, you may choose to leave out the street address. For example:

> The Reagan Library

> Simi Valley, California

Reception Details

If your wedding ceremony and reception are held at the same venue, you can simply indicate "Reception to follow" or "Dinner and dancing to follow" at the same location. This can be included on the same line as the venue address or on a separate line. Here's how it might look:

> The Ritz-Carlton

> 1234 Main Street

> Los Angeles, California

> Reception to follow

If your reception is at a different location, you have a couple of options. You can include the full address and details of the reception venue on a separate line, like this:

> The Ritz-Carlton

> 1234 Main Street

> Los Angeles, California

> The Garden Room

> 5678 Flower Road

> Los Angeles, California

> Dinner and dancing to follow

Alternatively, you can provide the reception details on a separate details card tucked inside the invitation suite. This is especially useful if you have limited space on your invitation or if you want to include additional information about the reception.

Zip Codes and Country Names

Traditionally, zip codes are not included in wedding invitations, even for formal affairs. However, if you are concerned about clarity or if your venue is in an area with multiple zip codes, you may choose to include it. Country names are only necessary if your wedding is taking place abroad.

Time and Date

The time and date of your wedding should be spelled out in full for formal invitations. For example, if your wedding is on September 15, 2024, at 4:30 p.m., the wording could be:

> Saturday, the fifteenth of September, two thousand twenty-four, at half after four in the afternoon

You can also indicate the time of day with phrases like "four o'clock" or "half past four o'clock."

Multiple Venues or Events

If you are hosting multiple events during your wedding weekend, such as a rehearsal dinner or a post-wedding brunch, you have a few options. You can include all the relevant information on separate details cards enclosed with the invitation. This ensures that your guests have all the necessary details in one place.

Alternatively, if there is enough space on your invitation, you can include the additional event details directly on the invitation. Just be mindful of the overall design and layout to ensure it remains clear and elegant.

Frequently asked questions