Wedding Guest List: Who Gets A Family Invite?

Wedding invitations are a crucial part of wedding planning. It is considered good etiquette to send invitations to all family members, including immediate family and adult children living away from home. The invitations should be addressed formally, with titles and full names, and sent out six to eight weeks before the wedding. It is also important to include an RSVP card and a pre-addressed, stamped envelope to make it easy for guests to respond.

Etiquette for addressing family members on wedding invitations

When it comes to addressing family members on wedding invitations, there are a few etiquette rules to follow to ensure clarity and avoid any confusion or offence. Here are some guidelines to help you navigate this task with ease:

• Use formal titles and full names: On the outer envelope, it is customary to use formal titles such as "Mr.", "Mrs.", or "Ms." followed by the invitees' full names. For married couples, you can address them as "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's full name. However, this may be considered outdated, and you can instead use both their first and last names, such as "Mr. John and Mrs. Emily Perkins."
• Consider the level of formality: The outer envelope is generally more formal than the inner envelope. If you are using double envelopes, maintain a formal tone on the outer envelope and be more casual on the inner one. The inner envelope can include simple first names without titles.
• Address unmarried couples separately: If you are inviting an unmarried couple living together, use separate lines for each individual. List the person you feel closest to on the first line and their partner on the second line.
• Specify invited family members: If you want to be specific about which family members are invited, write the names of each family member, starting with the parents and listing the children's names in order of age below. You can address female children under 18 as "Miss."
• Send separate invitations to adult children: Proper wedding invitation etiquette dictates that adult children, even those living in the family home, should receive their own invitations.
• Handle widows with sensitivity: When inviting a widow, it is advisable to reach out to a family member to inquire about her preferred form of address. You can use her full name followed by her married last name or her husband's full name. For the inner envelope, you can shorten it to her first name or last name.
• Be clear about children's invitations: If you are not inviting children, do not include their names on the inner envelope. However, be aware that some guests may still assume their children are invited. To avoid confusion, mention on your wedding website that children are not invited due to venue constraints.
• Provide a return address: Include a return address on the outer envelope to ensure that any undelivered invitations can be returned to you. This way, you can reach out to the intended guest directly and update their address.
• Allow for ample time: Give yourself plenty of time to assemble and mail the invitations. Stuff the envelopes carefully, positioning the inner envelope so that the flat side faces the flap of the outer envelope.
• Weigh and stamp appropriately: Before affixing stamps, weigh a completed invitation at the post office to ensure you have the correct postage. Include postage on the RSVP envelopes as well.

Should you send invites to family members you see often?

When it comes to sending wedding invitations, it is generally considered good etiquette to send invites to all family members, even those you see often. This includes immediate family members such as parents, siblings, and grandparents. Sending invitations to all family members ensures that everyone feels included and valued, and it can also help with organisation and keeping a record of your guest list.

It is worth noting that there may be exceptions to this rule, such as if your family members are hosting the wedding. In this case, it may not be necessary to send them a formal invitation, but it is still a nice gesture to do so. Additionally, if you are having a very small, intimate wedding, you may choose to only invite certain family members.

When addressing wedding invitations to family members, there are a few different options to consider. If you want to specify which family members are invited, you can write out each person's name individually, including parents and children in order of age, with female children under the age of 18 addressed as "Miss". For example:

> The Simpson Family

> Mr. and Mrs. Homer Simpson

> Mr. Bart Simpson

> Miss Lisa Simpson

If you are inviting the entire family, you can simply address the envelope to "The Simpson Family" or "Mr. & Mrs. Homer Simpson". Then, on the inner envelope, you can list the first names of all invited family members:

> Mr. and Mrs. Simpson

> Bart, Lisa, and Maggie

> or

> Homer, Marge, Bart, Miss Lisa, and Miss Maggie

It is also worth considering the formality of your wedding when addressing the invitations. For a casual wedding, you may be able to use less formal language, such as leaving out titles or using first names only. However, for a more formal wedding, it is generally best to err on the side of formality and use full names and titles.

Finally, don't forget to consider the practical aspects of sending invitations to family members. If you are on a tight budget, you may want to hand-deliver invitations to family members to save on postage costs. Additionally, it is always a good idea to order extra invitations in case of mistakes or last-minute changes to your guest list.

How to address married couples in the family

When addressing wedding invitations to married couples, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to use their correct titles or prefixes. For heterosexual couples, the outer envelope is usually addressed using "Mr." and "Mrs." and the husband's first and last name. For same-sex couples, either name can go first. If the couple shares the same last name, you can use "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's name, or you can use both the husband's and wife's first and last names.

If the couple has different last names, you can list either name first, based on your preference or alphabetisation. "Mrs." is traditionally used to indicate a married woman's status.

For couples with one hyphenated name, list the non-hyphenated name first. Either "Ms." or "Mrs." can be used for the person with the hyphenated name.

If one partner has a distinguished title, such as a military rank or "The Honourable", this should be used first, regardless of gender.

For couples with two distinguished titles, the higher-ranking title should come first, and if they are of the same rank, the woman is traditionally listed first.

For couples where one or both partners are doctors, the doctor's name is listed first, regardless of gender. If both partners are doctors with the same last name, you can use "Doctors" followed by their names.

• Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle"
• Outer envelope: "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle"
• Outer envelope: "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez"
• Inner envelope: "Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez" or "Maria and David"
• Outer envelope: "Mr. Marcus Craft and Mr. Brian Crosby-Craft"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. Craft and Mr. Crosby-Craft" or "Marcus and Brian"
• Outer envelope: "The Honourable Josephine Wood and Mr. Jonathan Wood"
• Inner envelope: "Judge Wood and Mr. Wood"

How to address unmarried couples in the family

When addressing unmarried couples in your family, there are a few different approaches you can take depending on the formality of your wedding and your relationship with the couple in question.

If you are using a traditional or formal invitation style, the general format for addressing an unmarried couple is to list each person's name on a separate line, with the person you are closest to listed first. If you are equally close to both people, list the names in alphabetical order by surname. For example:

> Outer envelope: "Mr. Stanley Kim

> Ms. Amanda Rhee"

>

> Inner envelope: "Mr. Kim

> Ms. Rhee" or "Stanley

> "Amanda"

If your wedding is casual, or you are using an informal or casual-toned invitation, you can be more flexible with how you address unmarried couples. You can list both names on the same line, with the person you are closest to listed first, or in alphabetical order if you are equally close to both. For example:

> Outer envelope: "Mr. Aaron Triguiero

> Mr. Gabriel Reyes"

>

> Inner envelope: "Mr. Triguiero

> Mr. Reyes"

If you are only using one envelope, the format is the same as for the outer envelope in a traditional invitation.

How to address children in the family on wedding invitations

When addressing children in the family on wedding invitations, there are a few guidelines to follow. Firstly, it is important to note that children under 18 are typically only listed on the inner envelope, and boys under 18 do not need a title. Girls under 18 can be addressed as "Miss". If you are inviting children under 18, list their names on the second line of the inner envelope in order of age. For example, "Michael, Miss Rebecca, and Steven".

If there are children over 18 in the family, they should receive their own invitation. Use their full formal name on the outer envelope and the honorific "Mr." or "Ms." on the inner envelope. For example, "Ms. Audrey Abraham" on the outer envelope, and "Ms. Abraham" on the inner envelope.

If you are not inviting any children to the wedding, simply omit their names from the invitation. However, be aware that some guests may still assume that their children are invited. To avoid confusion, it is a good idea to mention on your wedding website that children are not invited. For example, "We regret that we cannot invite children to the ceremony or reception as the venue will not accommodate them."

Frequently asked questions