Franklin Dean
Wedding invitations are a tricky business, especially when it comes to including the names of deceased parents. While some people believe that the invitation is not the place to honour the deceased, others feel that including their names is a nice tribute. Ultimately, it is up to the couple to decide how they want to word their invitations, and there are several ways to include a deceased parent while still maintaining the traditional format.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Include deceased parent's name | Yes, it is a way to honour them and keep their memory alive |
| Wording | Tricky, but can be done formally or informally |
| Honouring elsewhere | Yes, through a candle, poem, song, or tribute in the program |
| Host | If the deceased parent is the host, their name should not be included |
What You'll Learn
Including a deceased parent in wedding invitation wording
There are many ways to include a deceased parent in your wedding invitation wording. Here are some examples and guidelines to help you navigate this sensitive topic:
Traditional and Formal Wording
If you prefer a traditional and formal approach, you can include the deceased parent's name along with the surviving parent. Here's an example:
> Mrs. Sharon Henderson
>
> and the late Mr. Nathan Henderson
>
> request the honor of your presence
>
> at the marriage of their daughter
>
> Preston John Brackman
>
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
>
> Two-thousand and twenty-six
>
> at six o'clock in the evening
>
> Dripping Springs, Texas
This format is suitable for a traditional wedding and can be easily adapted for same-sex weddings by changing the wording accordingly.
Less Formal Wording
If you prefer a less formal approach, you can include both the surviving and deceased parent's names, followed by "families and friends." Here's an example:
> Fatima and the late Arjun Sharma
>
> the families and friends of
>
> at the celebration of their marriage
>
> on Saturday, July 21st, 2024, at 6:00 p.m.
>
> Bluxome Street Winery
>
> San Francisco, California
Same-Sex Weddings
When crafting wedding invitations for same-sex weddings, you can adapt the wording to suit your needs. Simply swap "daughter" for "son" or "bride" for "groom" to personalise the invitation.
Including Step-Parents
If you want to include a step-parent and a deceased parent on the invitation, you can use wording such as:
> Moira and Alistair Schiller
>
> request the honor of your presence
>
> at the marriage of her
>
> and the late Porter Blackman's daughter
>
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
>
> Two-thousand and twenty-six
>
> at six o'clock in the evening
Alternative Ways to Honour Deceased Parents
While including the deceased parent's name on the invitation is a touching tribute, some people prefer to honour their memory in other ways. Here are some alternative suggestions:
- Have their favourite poem read at the ceremony.
- Play their favourite song during the wedding.
- Light a candle in their memory.
- Share a few words about how you wish they were there.
- Write a tribute in the wedding program.
- Display photos of them at the wedding venue.
Remember, the most important thing is to follow your heart and do what feels right for you. Your guests will appreciate the tribute, and your parent's memory will be honoured on your special day.
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Honouring a deceased parent without listing them as a host
Honouring a deceased parent is a highly personal choice, and there is no right or wrong way to do it. Here are some ways to honour a deceased parent without listing them as a host on the wedding invitation:
During the Wedding Speeches
- Incorporate their memory into your speech or ask a relative or your spouse to do so.
- Read a poem of remembrance. Poetry helps express emotions and experiences. You can choose a classic poem or write your own.
- Offer a toast on behalf of your loved one, perhaps with their favourite drink.
- Read a letter from or to your loved one. Many parents write notes to their children to read on their wedding day.
During the Ceremony
- Leave a chair open to represent their presence and that they are looking down on you.
- Light a memorial candle. In many cultures, lighting a candle symbolises unity. You can twist this tradition by lighting a candle to represent loved ones who have passed away.
- Write a message in the programs. You can print a program with a short tribute, such as "In remembrance of [name]."
- Carry a memento with you. For example, wear a piece of their jewellery or carry a photo of them in your pocket.
- Honour their memory during the ceremony by reading quotes, passages, or other tributes. Talk to your officiant about your wishes, and they can provide suggestions.
During the Reception
- Play their favourite song.
- Create a commemorative presentation with slideshows, videos, and memories of your loved one.
- Visit their grave before or after the reception and share your joy with them.
- Acknowledge their absence in your ceremony. Work with your officiant to find the right words to honour their memory.
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Invitations when the bride's parent has passed away
There are many ways to include a deceased parent on a wedding invitation, and it is ultimately up to the couple to decide what they prefer. Here are some examples of invitation wording when the bride's parent has passed away:
Formal Wording
This example is formal and suitable for a traditional wedding. For a same-sex wedding with two brides, simply swap "son" for "daughter".
> Mrs. Sharon Henderson
>
> and the late Mr. Nathan Henderson
>
> request the honour of your presence
>
> at the marriage of their daughter
>
> Preston John Brackman
>
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
>
> Two-thousand and twenty-six
>
> at six o'clock in the evening
>
> Dripping Springs, Texas
Informal Wording
This example is less formal but still includes the bride's late parent:
> Fatima and the late Arjun Sharma
>
> the families and friends of
>
> at the celebration of their marriage
>
> on Saturday, July 21st, 2024 at 6:00 pm
>
> Bluxome Street Winery
>
> San Francisco, California
Collaborative Hosting
If the wedding is hosted and paid for by the couple and both sets of parents, the invitation can be worded as follows:
> Together with their parents, [bride's name] and [groom's name] request the pleasure of your company...
If the bride's parent has passed away, the invitation can be rearranged to include their name:
> [Bride's name], daughter of Mr. [father's name] and the late [mother's name], and [groom's name], son of Mr. and Mrs. [groom's parents' names], request the honour of your presence at their wedding...
Honouring the Deceased Parent
While the invitation is not the place to honour the deceased, their name can be included as long as it doesn't appear to be sent by them. The wedding program or another part of the wedding can be used to honour their memory.
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Invitations when the groom's parent has passed away
When it comes to wedding invitations, it can be tricky to know how to word them when a parent has passed away. If you are the groom and your parent has passed away, you may want to find a special way to honour their memory on your wedding day. One way to do this is to include their name on your wedding invitation.
> Mr. and Mrs. Jay Courier
> Mrs. Hannah Fullerton and the late Andrew Fullerton
> request the honour of your presence
> at the marriage of their children
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
> Two thousand and twenty-six
> at six o'clock in the evening
> 912 Sixth Street South
> Minneapolis, Minnesota
If you would prefer a less formal approach, you can opt for the following wording:
> Mr. and Mrs. Jay Courier
> and
> Mrs. Hannah Fullerton and the late Andrew Fullerton
> invite you to the marriage of their children
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
> Two thousand and twenty-six
> at six o'clock in the evening
> 912 Sixth Street South
> Minneapolis, Minnesota
If you are the groom and your parent has passed away, but you do not want to include their name on the invitation, that is okay too. Here is an example of how to word the invitation without mentioning your deceased parent:
> Mr. and Mrs. Jay Courier
> request the honour of your presence
> at the marriage of their son
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
> Two thousand and twenty-six
> at six o'clock in the evening
> 912 Sixth Street South
> Minneapolis, Minnesota
Ultimately, the most important thing is to go with your heart when considering how to word your wedding invitations. Your guests will be touched, and your parent's memory will be honoured.
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Honouring a deceased parent in other ways
There are many ways to honour a deceased parent at your wedding, and it's a wonderful way to feel their presence on your special day. Here are some ideas to consider:
- Wear a memento of your parent, such as a piece of their jewellery, a handkerchief, or a pocket square. You could also incorporate a piece of fabric from their clothing into your wedding attire or add a special patch or embroidery to your outfit.
- Carry their favourite flowers in your bouquet or boutonniere. White roses are also a traditional choice, symbolising remembrance and honour.
- Display a framed photo or portrait of your parent at the ceremony or reception. You could even hire an artist to create a custom portrait or illustration.
- Play their favourite song at your reception. If your parent loved to dance, this can be a beautiful way to honour their memory and get your guests involved.
- Serve their favourite food or drink at the reception. Offer a signature cocktail or treat your guests to a special recipe.
- Give a wedding favour in their honour, such as jars of their favourite sweets or miniature bottles of their favourite drink.
- Donate to a charity that was important to them in lieu of gifts.
- Visit their grave before or after the wedding to share the joy of your special day with them.
- Reserve a seat for them at the ceremony, perhaps with a bouquet of flowers or a special sign.
- Light a memorial candle during the ceremony or reception.
- Include a tribute in your wedding program, such as a poem, quote, or a simple "In Loving Memory" message.
- Ask your celebrant to say a few words in honour of your parent during the ceremony.
- Wear their favourite scent as your perfume or cologne for the day.
- Add a keepsake to your bouquet, such as a photo charm or a symbol that reminds you of them.
- Create a memory table with framed photos, sentimental objects, and mementos.
- Play a special song or read a poem during a moment of reflection at the ceremony.
- Incorporate their favourite flowers into your wedding decor, such as aisle markers or boutonnieres.
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Frequently asked questions
It is generally considered improper to list a deceased person on a wedding invitation as the invite is issued by the hosts of the party. However, some people choose to include their deceased parent's name on the invitation as a way to honour their memory.
There are several ways to include a deceased parent on your wedding invitation. Here is an example of formal wording for a traditional wedding:
> Mrs Sharon Henderson
>
> and the late Mr Nathan Henderson
>
> request the honour of your presence
>
> at the marriage of their daughter
>
> Preston John Brackman
>
> on Saturday, the twenty-first of July
>
> Two-thousand and twenty-six
>
> at six o'clock in the evening
>
> Dripping Springs, Texas
Yes, there are several other ways to honour a deceased parent during your wedding. Some ideas include having their favourite poem read at the ceremony, playing their favourite song, lighting a candle for them, saying a few words about how you wish they were there, or writing a tribute for the program.
Some alternatives to listing your deceased parent on the invitation include using "Together with their families..." or simply listing your own name(s).
