The bridal shower is a time-honoured tradition, dating back to the 16th or 17th century, where close friends and family gather to celebrate the bride-to-be with gifts and well-wishes. While the exact origins are unclear, it is believed that the bridal shower originated in the Netherlands, where the town would offer gifts to a bride whose father refused to provide a dowry. Today, the bridal shower is an opportunity to shower the bride with gifts for the home and is often a collaboration between the maid of honour, bridesmaids, mother of the bride, and other close friends and family.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Who throws the bridal shower? | The maid of honour, bridesmaids, mother of the bride, mother-in-law, family friends, friends of the in-laws, aunts, cousins, or a combination of these people. |
Who pays for the bridal shower? | The host, or a combination of the host and other people. |
Who decides on the guest list? | The host, in collaboration with the bride. |
Who decides on the theme? | The host, in collaboration with the bride. |
Who decides on the date? | The host, in collaboration with the bride. |
Who sends out the invitations? | The host. |
Who provides decorations and favours? | The host. |
Who decides on the games? | The host, in collaboration with the bride. |
Who creates a music playlist? | The host. |
Who sets up the venue? | The host. |
What You'll Learn
Who hosts a bridal shower?
The bridal shower is a pre-wedding event that is steeped in tradition. It is a chance for the bride's nearest and dearest to gather and celebrate the woman of the hour before her big day. It is also an opportunity to gift the bride with items she will need to start her married life.
Who Hosts?
The bridal shower is usually hosted by the maid of honour, sometimes in conjunction with the mother of the bride. However, there are no rules about who can host. Today, it is extremely common and perfectly acceptable for anyone close to the bride, including her mother, to host this celebration.
The bridesmaids, wedding party, and the bride's family can all pitch in if necessary. It is becoming more common for the bridal party to host the bridal shower, especially if the bride's mother is unable or unwilling to do so. In some cases, the bride's mother and the maid of honour will work together to plan and host the event.
If the bride has family or friends who live far away, it is not uncommon for her to have two bridal showers, one hosted by each group. In this case, it is important to keep the guest lists separate so that people do not feel forced to buy two gifts or travel to two events.
Who Pays?
The host of the bridal shower usually pays for it, although costs can be shared if there are multiple hosts. It is not uncommon for other bridesmaids or family members to offer to chip in with the costs.
Who Plans?
The host of the bridal shower is also responsible for planning the event, although they may enlist the help of others. The bride will usually provide some basics that she would like at the event, such as themes, guest lists, dates, locations, and activities. It is then up to the host to bring the shower to life.
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Who pays for a bridal shower?
Traditionally, the bridal party, led by the maid of honour, pays for the bridal shower. However, in modern times, it is becoming increasingly common for the mother of the bride, the bride herself, and other members of the bridal party to chip in. The total cost of a bridal shower can range from a few hundred dollars to several thousand, depending on the number of guests and the venue.
The host(s) of the bridal shower will usually be responsible for covering the costs of the venue, food, drinks, decorations, and entertainment. Bridal shower favours and gifts for the bride are also customary, but optional.
If you are hosting a bridal shower, it is a good idea to create a budget and discuss how much each person is comfortable contributing. It is important to remember that the bridal party may also be budgeting for other wedding expenses, such as gifts, attire, and travel.
- Opt for an at-home shower if one of the hosts has the space.
- DIY the decorations.
- Prepare food and drinks yourself, or take out from a local restaurant.
- Choose a simple theme, such as a ladies' tea party, instead of a more elaborate event.
- Delegate responsibilities among the bridal party and close family members to lighten the financial burden on any one person.
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What happens at a bridal shower?
A bridal shower is a party held for the bride-to-be in the months leading up to her wedding. It is an opportunity for her loved ones to celebrate with her and "shower" her with gifts and attention.
Bridal showers are usually hosted by the maid of honour, sometimes in conjunction with the mother of the bride, bridesmaids, wedding party, or other close female family members and friends. The host is typically responsible for covering the costs, although it is becoming more common for multiple people to split the costs and duties.
The guest list for a bridal shower usually includes the bridal party, close female family members, and good friends of the bride who will be attending the wedding. The bride provides the guest list, and the host makes the final selection.
A bridal shower can be held at a host's home, a restaurant, a spa, a winery, or any other location of the host's choosing. It is often hosted as a lunch or brunch, but can also be held in the evening. The event typically lasts a few hours and includes food, drinks, and time for guests to connect and socialise.
- Food and drinks are served, and guests have time to mingle and get to know each other.
- There may be an icebreaker activity, such as an introduction game or an "icebreaker" question.
- Guests play one or two bridal shower games. These could include trivia about the bride and their spouse-to-be, designing a dress out of toilet paper, a themed scavenger hunt, or something that aligns with a specific theme, like a spa day, tarot readings, or a cooking class.
- The bride opens her gifts in front of the guests, and the maid of honour writes down the details of each gift for thank-you notes.
- The bride's fiancé may arrive towards the end of the shower with a bouquet for the bride and spend some time greeting the guests.
- The couple may participate in an extra special activity, like cutting a cake or playing the "newlywed game" together.
Bridal showers are a chance for the bride to celebrate with her loved ones and receive gifts to help her prepare for married life. The activities and itinerary can be tailored to the bride's preferences, creating a memorable and special event.
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What is the groom's role?
While the bridal shower is all about the bride, the groom can still play a small role in the celebrations. The groom often arrives towards the end of the bridal shower to greet the guests before they depart. He may bring flowers for his future spouse and help transport gifts home.
The groom can also be involved in the planning process, sharing his preferences with the host and providing input on the guest list, venue, and other details. If the couple prefers, they may choose to plan and pay for the bridal shower themselves, particularly for a couple's shower, which involves both the bride and groom and a larger group of guests.
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When should a bridal shower take place?
The bridal shower should take place at some point before the wedding. While there's no set rule on when it has to happen, bridal showers generally occur anywhere from a few weeks to a few months out. If you're hosting, choose a date that is convenient for both the bride and the most important guests. To accommodate everyone's schedules, you might host something a little further in advance or plan it to coincide with a trip home or another get-together, such as a bachelorette party in the evening following an afternoon shower.
Some brides like to have their bridal shower the week of the wedding so that guests don't have to travel twice. However, this can be a lot to ask of the bridal party, who will likely be busy with other wedding-related events and preparations. It's also worth bearing in mind that the bridal shower is a chance for the bride to open gifts, and she may not want to do this the week of the wedding when her schedule will be busy and stressful.
If you're planning a surprise bridal shower, you'll need to be extra vigilant about choosing a date that works for the bride and key guests. You'll also need to enlist the help of the maid of honour or the bride's mother to come up with a guest list that you think the bride will be happy with.
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Frequently asked questions
The bridal shower is usually hosted by the maid of honour, bridesmaids, or the mother of the bride, along with help from the bride's family and friends. However, there are no rules on who can host, and anyone close to the bride can host if they feel up to the task.
The bridesmaids help the maid of honour with planning logistics. On the day of the bridal shower, they run the party, making sure everything goes smoothly and that the guests are taken care of.
The cost of a bridal shower depends on factors such as the number of guests, location, food, decorations, and entertainment. The average cost for a gathering of 40 guests can range from $400 to $6,000.