Deborah Chan
Being a bridesmaid comes with a lot of expenses, and it can be confusing to know whether you're expected to buy a wedding gift for the happy couple on top of all the other costs. While it's not mandatory, it is customary to give a gift to the newlyweds, either before, on, or shortly after the wedding day. But with so many other costs to consider, how much should you budget for a gift? And what's an appropriate gift for the happy couple?
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Should bridesmaids give a gift? | Opinions vary. Some bridesmaids choose to give a gift, while others don't feel the need to. It depends on the relationship with the couple and the expenses already incurred. |
| Average amount spent on a gift | $125 |
| Gift ideas | An item from the couple's registry, a gift card, a bottle of wine, or a sentimental gift. |
What You'll Learn
Should bridesmaids give a gift?
Being a bridesmaid is an honour and a wonderful way to support a friend or family member on their wedding day. But it can also be an expensive and time-consuming role. From dresses to hair and makeup, travel, and accommodation, the costs can quickly add up. So, should bridesmaids also be expected to give a gift?
The short answer
There is no definitive answer to this question, and opinions vary. Some people believe that the role of a bridesmaid is gift enough, while others argue that a gift is always expected, regardless of other expenses.
The long answer
The role of a bridesmaid often involves a lot of time and financial commitment. As well as the cost of the bridesmaid's dress and accessories, there may be hair and makeup to consider, and travel and accommodation expenses if the wedding is taking place away from home. There may also be pre-wedding events such as an engagement party, bridal shower, or bachelorette party, which can add to the overall cost.
Some people feel that, given these expenses, it is not necessary or expected for bridesmaids to give a gift. In fact, some brides may specifically request that their bridesmaids do not give gifts, particularly if they are already spending a lot of money on their role in the wedding.
However, others believe that a gift is always expected, regardless of other costs. This could be a physical gift, such as an item from the couple's wedding registry, or a cash gift. It is also common for bridesmaids to club together to buy a group gift, particularly if there is an expensive item on the registry that they want to contribute towards.
If a bridesmaid does choose to give a gift, how much they spend is entirely up to them and should be based on their budget. On average, bridesmaids spend around $125 on a wedding gift, but this can vary depending on individual circumstances. It is important for bridesmaids to be mindful of their own financial situation and not feel pressured to spend more than they can afford.
Ultimately, the decision to give a gift or not is a personal one, and there is no right or wrong answer. If a bridesmaid wants to give a gift but is concerned about the cost, they could consider a thoughtful, personalised gift or a group gift with the other bridesmaids. However, if the expense is too great, a heartfelt card may be a more suitable option.
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What are some gift ideas for bridesmaids?
Being a bridesmaid can be expensive, with costs for travel, accommodation, meals, hair, makeup, and the outfit all adding up. On top of this, bridesmaids are expected to buy gifts for the happy couple at some pre-wedding events, as well as the wedding itself. If you're a bridesmaid looking for gift inspiration, here are some ideas to get you started:
Engagement Party
A nice bottle of champagne is always a good option, but if you want to get something for the bride, consider a personalised coffee mug or an engagement photo frame.
Bridal Shower
If the bridal shower has a theme, you could get a gift that fits within that theme. Otherwise, you could go for something from the couple's wedding registry or a small gift card. Gifts for bridal showers are often priced between $25 and $50.
Bachelorette Party
Planning and paying for the bachelorette party is considered a gift in itself, but if you want to get the bride something extra, you could pitch in with the other bridesmaids to buy a funny t-shirt or another keepsake.
Wedding
On average, bridesmaids spend around $125 on a wedding gift, but you should only spend what you can afford. You could go for a group gift with the other bridesmaids, or buy something from the couple's wedding registry. If you can't find anything on the registry that you want to gift, think about what the couple would enjoy or need for their home. For example, you could get them a bottle of wine and two glasses, a gift certificate to a romantic restaurant, or a beautiful frame for their wedding portrait.
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How much should bridesmaids spend on gifts?
Being a bridesmaid can be expensive, and it's understandable if you're concerned about how much to spend on a gift for the bride. Here are some guidelines and suggestions to help you decide on an appropriate amount.
Traditional Etiquette
According to traditional wedding etiquette, bridesmaids are expected to give a gift to the bride. This includes gifts for the bridal shower and the wedding itself. However, if you are hosting or contributing significantly to the cost of the bridal shower, you are not obligated to spend a lot on a shower gift. Instead, you can allocate your budget towards the wedding gift or participate in a group gift with the other bridesmaids.
Gift Amount Guidelines
There are no hard and fast rules regarding gift amounts, and ultimately, you should give what you can comfortably afford. Some sources suggest that bridesmaids spend between $100 and $150 on a wedding gift, or more if you are splitting the cost with a plus-one. This amount can be adjusted based on your budget and the number of pre-wedding events you are participating in. If you are spending a significant amount on your dress, hair, makeup, and other bridesmaid expenses, you may need to adjust your gift budget accordingly.
Alternative Gift Ideas
If you are unable to spend a lot on a gift, there are alternative options to consider. You could give a thoughtful, personalised, or homemade gift that the bride will appreciate. Another idea is to join forces with the other bridesmaids and give a group gift, which can be more affordable for everyone involved. You could also offer non-monetary contributions, such as helping with wedding planning or providing services like photography or makeup artistry if you have those skills.
Communication is Key
If you are concerned about gift expectations, it is best to communicate openly with the bride and other bridesmaids. Discuss your budget constraints and decide on an amount that you are comfortable with. Remember, the bride will likely appreciate your presence and support during the wedding celebrations, regardless of the gift you give.
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How does a group gift work?
Group gifting is a way to allow multiple guests to contribute to a gift for the couple. This is especially useful for more expensive items, allowing guests to give within their budget while the couple receives gifts they want.
Group gifting works by allowing guests to contribute any amount of their choice to a gift. Once the gift reaches its total, it is marked as purchased. If the total isn't reached, the couple can pay the remainder or spend it as credit.
Group gifting is not limited to physical gifts but can also include honeymoon contributions and cash gifts. This flexibility allows guests to choose how they want to give, whether it is by buying an actual gift, gifting money, or contributing to a honeymoon fund.
The group gifting feature can be enabled for any item on a registry, and guests can purchase the whole gift if they wish. The cost of tax is built into the overall price, so the couple doesn't have to pay anything out of pocket when shipping the gift.
Group gifting is a convenient way to give gifts that are within the guest's budget while still allowing the couple to receive the gifts they truly want.
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What other gifts should bridesmaids expect to purchase?
As a bridesmaid, you may be expected to purchase multiple gifts for the happy couple. Here are some of the gifts you should expect to buy:
Engagement Party Gift
If there is an engagement party, it is customary to bring a gift. This is usually priced lower than a wedding gift, with a range of $25 to $50. You can give a gift card or something small and thoughtful, like a personalised coffee mug or an engagement photo frame.
Bridal Shower Gift
If there is a bridal shower, it is expected that you will bring a gift. The price of these gifts is usually lower than a wedding gift. You can use the couple's wedding registry as a guide to find an appropriate gift within your budget. If you are the maid of honour or have contributed a lot to the cost of the bridal shower, you are not required to spend a lot of money on a shower gift.
Wedding Gift
Even though you are already spending a lot of money as a bridesmaid, it is considered good etiquette to still give a wedding gift to the couple. This can be an individual or group gift. On average, bridesmaids spend around $125 on a wedding gift, but you should only spend what you can afford. If it is a destination wedding, it is still customary to give a gift, but it should be something small that is easy for the couple to carry, like an envelope of cash or a gift card.
Bachelorette Party Gift
Although not necessary, you may want to surprise the bride with a small gift at the bachelorette party, like a funny t-shirt or another keepsake.
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Frequently asked questions
Bridesmaids are not required to give wedding gifts, but it is customary and appreciated.
Bridesmaids can give individual gifts or pitch in for a group gift. Gifts can be something from the couple's wedding registry or something more personalised, like a bottle of wine and two glasses.
Bridesmaids should spend what they can afford. On average, bridesmaids spend around $125 on wedding gifts, but this can range from $25 to $1,800 depending on budget and other expenses.
Yes, gifts are expected at pre-wedding events like the engagement party and bridal shower. These gifts are usually less expensive than wedding gifts, typically ranging from $25 to $50.
Yes, gifts are still expected for destination weddings unless the couple specifically says otherwise. However, it's best not to bring a large gift that will be difficult for the couple to carry home.
