Who Should Give Toasts: Bridesmaids Or Best Men?

Wedding toasts are a highly anticipated tradition that has stuck around for centuries. While the bride's parents, groom, best man, and maid of honour typically give speeches, bridesmaids are increasingly taking on this role, adding a modern twist to the traditional setup. This raises the question: are bridesmaids supposed to give toasts at wedding receptions?

Should bridesmaids give a speech or a toast?

While it's ultimately up to the couple to decide who gives a speech at their wedding, there are certain traditions and customs that are often followed.

Traditionally, the main people who contributed financially to the wedding are invited to give a speech at the reception. This often includes the bride's parents, the groom's parents, the best man, and the maid of honour. However, it is becoming increasingly popular for bridesmaids to give a speech as well.

If you are a bridesmaid and want to give a speech, it's a good idea to check with the couple first to see if this fits in with their plans for the day. You can also discuss the timing of your speech with them, as it is customary for certain people to speak before others. For example, the father of the bride often speaks first, followed by the groom, and then the best man.

If you are invited to give a speech, it's important to be prepared. A good wedding toast should be sincere, humorous, and concise, lasting around three to five minutes. It should include a congratulations to the newlyweds, an introduction of yourself and your relationship to the couple, a meaningful story, and your well-wishes for the couple's future.

Remember, the most important thing is to celebrate the couple and create a positive and enjoyable atmosphere for everyone in attendance.

What should a bridesmaid speech include?

While the structure of a bridesmaid's speech is flexible, there are some key elements that you should include. Firstly, start with a warm welcome and an acknowledgment of the joyous occasion. Then, briefly introduce yourself and explain your connection to the bride.

The main body of your speech should consist of 2-3 memorable stories or anecdotes that offer guests a glimpse into your bond with the bride and your relationship with the couple. This could include the bride's most admirable qualities, a funny or touching story from your friendship, or how you have witnessed their love grow. Avoid anything that could be deemed embarrassing or disrespectful.

Next, express your love and admiration for the couple. Talk about the bride's best qualities and how happy she is with her partner. You can also share your hopes and dreams for their future together. Finally, close your speech by inviting everyone to raise their glasses and toast the happy couple.

Remember to keep your speech concise, authentic, and sincere. It should be a maximum of 5 minutes long and come straight from the heart.

When should a bridesmaid give a toast?

There are differing opinions on when a bridesmaid should give a toast at a wedding reception. Some sources suggest that the bridesmaid should give a toast after the best man, who is usually the master of ceremonies and therefore gives the first toast. However, other sources suggest that the best man's toast is followed by the father of the bride, and then the groom. In this case, the bridesmaid would give her toast towards the end of the reception.

To ensure the reception runs smoothly, it is important to plan the order of toasts in advance. This will ensure that the toasters are ready and in the room when it is their turn to speak. It is also a good idea to inform the speakers of a time limit, usually around three to five minutes, to ensure that the guests remain interested and that the toasts do not interrupt the flow of the reception.

The content of a bridesmaid's toast should be heartfelt and focus on the couple's journey, rather than just a collection of funny anecdotes. It is also important to express admiration for the couple and offer meaningful wishes for their future together.

How long should a bridesmaid speech be?

While there is no set rule for how long a bridesmaid speech should be, it is generally recommended that they last for around 2-5 minutes. This is considered the "sweet spot" for a toast—enough time to share a story and some heartfelt words without causing guests to lose interest.

A bridesmaid speech that is too long risks becoming rambling and losing the attention of the audience. It is also likely to disrupt the flow of the wedding reception, keeping guests away from the dance floor for too long. However, a very short speech of under 2 minutes may also feel rushed and unnatural.

To ensure your speech is the perfect length, it is a good idea to practice beforehand, speaking slowly and clearly, and timing yourself. You can also ask for feedback from someone who doesn't know the couple well. This will help you determine if your speech is understandable, well-paced, and engaging.

Remember, the length of your speech may also depend on the number of other speakers and the timing of the reception. For example, if there are several other toasts, you may want to keep your speech on the shorter side. Additionally, if the speeches are taking place during dinner, you'll want to avoid speaking for too long while guests are still eating.

Who else should give a speech at a wedding?

While the order of speeches at a wedding is ultimately up to the couple, there are some traditional guidelines that can be followed. Here is a list of people who commonly give speeches at weddings:

The Couple's Parents

The parents of the couple, usually the father of the bride, often kick off the evening with a welcome toast and a message to the guests. This can be done by one or both sets of parents, depending on the couple's preference and family dynamics.

The Best Man and Maid of Honour

The best man and maid of honour usually speak towards the end of dinner. They typically share anecdotes about the couple, offer congratulations, and propose a toast. These speeches are usually heartwarming, encouraging, and lighthearted.

The Couple

It is also common for the couple to give a speech, either separately or together, to thank their parents and guests for celebrating with them. This can be done right after the maid of honour and best man or at a later time, such as when cutting the cake.

Other Speakers

In addition to the traditional speakers mentioned above, other individuals may give speeches at the wedding. This could include siblings, friends, grandparents, or even the bridesmaids. Ultimately, the couple can choose whoever they would like to speak at their wedding and create a unique order that works for them.

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