Who Pays For The Bridesmaids' Wedding Dinner?

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it's also a major financial commitment. Bridesmaids are expected to pay for their wedding day ensemble, including their dress, tuxedo, suit, and shoes. They may also be expected to cover the cost of hair and makeup, as well as travel and accommodation for the wedding night or weekend. Additionally, bridesmaids are usually responsible for planning and paying for the bachelorette party, bridal shower, and wedding shower gifts. While there is no obligation for bridesmaids to give a wedding gift, it is considered customary. Ultimately, it is important for bridesmaids to be transparent with the couple about their financial capabilities to avoid any misunderstandings or resentment.

Bridesmaids' meals

Planning a wedding can be stressful, and the financial burden on the bridal party can be a source of tension. While the bridesmaids are usually happy to contribute, it's important to be mindful of their budgets and not expect them to pay for everything. So, what are the bridesmaids' responsibilities when it comes to meals?

Pre-Wedding Meals

During the wedding planning process, there are often pre-wedding events such as the bridal shower and bachelorette party. The bridal shower is typically hosted and paid for by the maid of honor, bridesmaids, or the bride's family. It is considered good etiquette for the bridesmaids to contribute to the cost of food, decorations, and other expenses.

As for the bachelorette party, if it's a budget-friendly celebration or held locally, the bridesmaids usually cover most of the costs, including meals. However, for more extravagant or destination bachelorette parties, it becomes a grey area. While the bridal party is expected to pay for their own expenses, they are not typically expected to cover the bride's costs as well. They may pitch in for the bride's hotel or a special dinner, but not necessarily her airfare.

Wedding Day Meals

On the wedding day, the couple is expected to provide meals for the bridal party. This includes the rehearsal dinner, meals while getting ready on the wedding day, and the wedding reception. The bridal party is not expected to pay for their meals on the wedding day.

Wedding Gifts

While it is customary for bridesmaids to purchase a wedding gift, there is no obligation to do so, especially if they have already spent a significant amount of money on various wedding-related expenses. If they do choose to give a gift, it is thoughtful to go in with other bridesmaids on a group gift or purchase something small from the couple's registry.

In summary, while bridesmaids are expected to contribute financially to certain pre-wedding events, they should not be expected to pay for their meals on the wedding day. The couple should provide meals for the bridal party throughout the wedding day and may even contribute to their travel and accommodation expenses. It is essential to have open and honest communication about financial expectations to ensure that everyone is comfortable with the costs involved.

Bridesmaids' dresses

So, you've been asked to be a bridesmaid! It's an honour, but it can also be a financial burden. One of the biggest expenses you'll likely face is the cost of your bridesmaid dress. Here are some things to keep in mind when it comes to choosing and paying for your dress:

Who Pays for the Bridesmaid Dresses?

Bridesmaids are typically expected to pay for their own dresses. The bride will usually have a specific vision for what she wants her bridesmaids to wear, but the method of choosing and purchasing the dresses can vary. Some brides may request that all bridesmaids wear the same dress, while others may allow each bridesmaid to choose their own dress within certain colour and style parameters. If you're given free rein to choose your own dress, this can be an opportunity to save money and opt for a more affordable and reusable option.

Cost of Bridesmaid Dresses

The cost of bridesmaid dresses can vary widely, ranging from $99 to $300 or more. It's important to be mindful of everyone's budget when choosing bridesmaid dresses. If you're the bride, consider having an upfront discussion with each of your bridesmaids about their budget before making any selections. Try to be flexible and consider picking a colour and silhouette while allowing your bridesmaids to choose their own dresses within that framework. That way, no one feels embarrassed about what they can or can't afford.

Accessories and Shoes

In addition to the dress itself, bridesmaids are usually expected to purchase any required accessories and shoes to complete their look. If you're a bride, try to be mindful of your bridesmaids' budgets and give them some direction without being overly controlling. If you're a bridesmaid, remember that you can always look for deals on accessories and shoes or borrow from friends to save money.

Mix and Match Styles

Nowadays, many brides are opting for mix-and-match bridesmaid styles, which can be a great way for bridesmaids to find dresses that suit their budgets and personal styles. This trend allows for more flexibility and can often be more affordable than traditional bridesmaid dresses.

Planning and Communication

Whether you're the bride or a bridesmaid, open and honest communication is key when it comes to planning and paying for bridesmaid dresses. Be transparent about your expectations and budgets to avoid any misunderstandings or financial strain. It's also a good idea to plan ahead and give everyone enough time to find dresses that fit within their budgets.

Other Bridesmaid Expenses

While the bridesmaid dress is a significant expense, it's important to remember that there are other costs associated with being a bridesmaid, such as travel, accommodations, bachelorette parties, and gifts. These expenses can quickly add up, so it's crucial for bridesmaids to be mindful of their overall budget when planning for the wedding.

Bachelorette parties

Planning a bachelorette party can be a daunting task, but with some creativity and consideration, it can be a memorable celebration for the bride-to-be. Here are some ideas to make it a success:

Sailing Away:

Why not set sail for a day and call it "The Last Sail Before the Veil"? Rent a boat, bring food, drinks, music, and swimsuits, and enjoy a party on the open sea. It's a unique twist to the usual crowded bars or lounges.

Distillery Tour:

Pick a distillery with some eye candy, like the one in Virginia, where you can find hot distillers and great cocktails. Or, for some music and mayhem, take a tour of the Jack Daniel's distillery in Nashville. If you're on the West Coast, check out You & Yours Distilling Co. in San Diego, California's first urban destination distillery led by women.

The Artful Bachelorette:

For a classy yet sassy party, consider The Artful Bachelorette, a live drawing class that offers a unique and memorable experience. It's a great option for those who want to stray from the ordinary.

Camping or Glamping:

For the outdoorsy type, plan a camping or glamping trip. Whether it's traditional camping or glamorous glamping, a weekend in nature with hiking, fishing, swimming, campfires, and s'mores will create unforgettable memories. If the group prefers a touch of luxury, opt for glamping to combine the outdoors with a dash of indulgence.

Spa Day:

If the bride-to-be is looking for a more low-key and relaxing experience, a spa day could be the perfect choice. Destinations like Canyon Ranch and Cal-a-Vie offer a peaceful getaway from the stress of wedding planning. It's a great opportunity to unwind and bond with the bridal crew.

Themed Parties:

From a nostalgic sleepover with adult beverages and face masks to a Barbie-themed bash, themed parties are always a fun option. You can even combine it with the glamping idea and set up an outdoor movie night with a projector.

Creative Activities:

Get those creative juices flowing with a paint party or a ceramics class. Bring some wine, and let everyone's artistic side shine through. If you're feeling adventurous, try something like goat yoga, which offers a fun twist to a traditional yoga class.

Destination Fun:

If you're feeling adventurous, consider a destination bachelorette party. Rent a villa in Tuscany or book a luxurious staycation in a nearby luxury hotel. It's a chance to create exclusive memories with the bride squad.

Foodie Fun:

Food-themed parties are always a delight. You can organize a classy tea party with delicate treats and champagne or go all out with a steak dinner where everyone can bring their own wine. If the group loves to cook, book a private cooking class or attend a culinary class together.

Games and Dancing:

Add some playful competition to the mix with games like bowling, axe-throwing, or a friendly bowling competition. If you're feeling adventurous, try a murder mystery party or channel your inner dancer with a series of dance classes. From pole dancing to belly dancing, it's a chance to learn something new and have a blast.

Remember, the key to a successful bachelorette party is tailoring it to the bride-to-be's interests and ensuring that everyone, including any pregnant bridesmaids, can comfortably participate. Happy planning!

Bridal showers

The name "bridal shower" comes from the custom of giving gifts to the bride to help her set up her new home. It is a tradition that dates back to the Victorian era when English colonists brought it to America.

Who Hosts a Bridal Shower?

Traditionally, the bridal shower was hosted by the maid of honour and bridesmaids. Today, it is common and acceptable for anyone close to the bride, including the bride's mother, to host this celebration.

Who Comes to a Bridal Shower?

This event is specifically for the bride, which means no men are usually invited. Many bridal showers include female friends and relatives like aunts, grandmothers, the bride's mother, and the mother of the groom. However, the bride can still invite whomever she wants. It is important to note that the bridal shower guest list is different from the wedding guest list. Not everyone invited to the wedding reception is invited to the bridal shower, but everyone invited to the bridal shower should be invited to the wedding reception!

Bridal Shower Etiquette

Bridal shower etiquette depends on the host, but generally, it is considered polite for the bride to host two separate showers: one for her female friends and another for her spouse's friends. Etiquette also says you should limit the number of bridal showers to two or three. If you do have more than one, be sure to invite each guest to only one shower.

At a bridal shower, guests will often bring gifts for the bride and her future spouse. These gifts are typically items that the couple will need for their new home together. The bride will open her gifts in front of the guests and express her gratitude. Bridal showers may also involve playing games, eating great food, and drinking the bride's favourite drinks.

Bridal Shower Gifts

Bridal shower gifts are typically things like dishes, pots and pans, appliances, and decor. Small, personalised gifts are often the most appreciated and affordable. You can also give open gifts, such as gift certificates, or opt for traditional gifts like kitchen appliances, towels, or bedding if you know the bride's style.

Bridal Shower Games

Games and entertainment are great for breaking the ice and helping guests get to know each other. Popular bridal shower games include:

• Guessing what the bride's wedding dress will look like
• "How Well Do You Know the Bride?" quiz
• Bridal shower bingo, where guests create cards with things they think the bride will say during her wedding speech

Bridesmaids' hair and makeup

There is no single answer to the question of who pays for bridesmaids' hair and makeup, and it will depend on several factors, including the preferences of the bride and her bridesmaids, the size of the bridal party, the wedding location and vibe, and the bride's budget.

Option 1: Bride Pays for Hair and Makeup

The most traditional arrangement is for the bride to cover all hair and makeup costs for the bridal party. This gives the bride more control over the beauty agenda for the wedding and allows for more time with her bridesmaids while they get ready together. However, this option can be expensive and difficult to coordinate, especially with a large bridal party.

Option 2: Bridesmaids Pay for Hair and Makeup

Another option is to let bridesmaids opt in and pay for their own hair and makeup services. This approach gives bridesmaids freedom to choose their preferred stylists and can be more cost-effective for the bride, especially with a large bridal party. However, if the bride requires specific hairstyles or makeup looks, it may not be fair to expect bridesmaids to pay for these services themselves.

Option 3: Bride and Bridesmaids Split the Cost

A third possibility is for the bride and bridesmaids to share the cost of hair and makeup services. This can be a good middle ground, especially if the bride wants to treat her bridesmaids but doesn't have the budget to cover all the costs. The bride may choose to pay for one service (such as hair) and leave the other (makeup) optional, or she may contribute a set amount towards each bridesmaid's services.

Communicating Expectations

Regardless of who pays, it is important for the bride and bridesmaids to communicate openly and honestly about expectations and budgets. Bridesmaids should not be expected to go into debt to pay for wedding-related expenses, and the bride should be flexible and understanding of their financial situations. If hair and makeup services are optional, the bride should make this clear in advance so that bridesmaids can plan and budget accordingly.

Other Considerations

The cost of hair and makeup services can vary significantly depending on the location and the reputation of the artist. Brides should be mindful of the financial commitments their bridesmaids are already making, such as travel, accommodation, and other wedding-related events, and consider ways to reduce costs, such as suggesting local salons or offering a range of options to suit different budgets.

Making it a Joyful Experience

Ultimately, getting ready with your bridesmaids on the morning of the wedding should be a joyful and memorable experience for everyone involved. Being a bridesmaid can be expensive, so brides may opt to cover some of these costs to thank their friends for their support and make it more affordable for them to be part of the wedding.

Frequently asked questions