The best man is expected to give the groom a gift or coordinate a group gift from the groomsmen. The gift is a token of appreciation for the groom and a way to congratulate him on his wedding. It is customary for the best man to give the gift on the morning of the wedding, either before the ceremony or during a moment alone with the groom and groomsmen. The gift can be something small and symbolic, like a heartfelt note or a unique token of their friendship. It is not necessary to spend a large amount of money on the gift, but it should be something thoughtful and personalised, reflecting the best man's knowledge of the groom's interests and personality.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
When to give the gift | Before the wedding, at the rehearsal dinner, or at the bachelor party |
Who gives the gift | The best man |
Who receives the gift | The groom |
Gift presentation | Aesthetically pleasing and thoughtful |
Gift type | Personalised, meaningful, practical, creative, within budget |
Gifting etiquette
As the best man, you are expected to give the groom a gift, or at least coordinate a group gift from the groomsmen. This is in addition to the gift you, as a member of the wedding party, may give to the couple.
The gift should be presented to the groom on the morning of the wedding, before the ceremony. If this is not possible, it can also be given at the rehearsal dinner or bachelor party.
The best man's gift should be more special than the groomsmen's gifts, but it doesn't have to be more expensive. It's a good idea to personalise the gift and make it meaningful, showing your appreciation for your friendship and the groom's role in your life.
Do:
- Consider the groom's interests, hobbies, and preferences.
- Personalise the gift to make it unique and thoughtful.
- Give a practical gift that the groom can use and enjoy.
- Include a handwritten note expressing your gratitude and best wishes.
- Plan ahead and don't leave gift shopping until the last minute.
- Remember to present the gift nicely and add a small token or trinket that symbolises your friendship.
Don't:
- Give a generic gift that lacks thought and meaning.
- Make the gift all about yourself. Instead, focus on what the groom would appreciate and enjoy.
- Wait until the last minute to buy the gift, as this may lead to rushed decisions and generic choices.
- Choose something inappropriate or offensive.
- Expect a gift from the groom in return. While it's customary for the groom to give gifts to the best man and groomsmen, it's not required for the best man to reciprocate.
Some unique and thoughtful gift ideas for the groom include:
- Personalised golf balls or other sports memorabilia.
- Adventure gear such as a camping hammock or a multi-tool set.
- Elegant cufflinks, perhaps with the groom's initials or the wedding date engraved on them.
- A personalised watch, engraved with a heartfelt message.
- A custom money clip with the groom's initials or a meaningful symbol.
- A nice bottle of wine, paired with a personalised wine opener or glasses.
- A set of high-quality whiskey glasses.
- An experience gift, such as a whiskey-tasting tour, a sports game, or a spa day.
- Personalised artwork that represents your friendship or a shared memory.
- A high-quality grooming kit, including premium essentials like a razor and shaving cream.
- A customised map of a place that holds significance for the groom, such as their hometown or the wedding location.
Remember, the most important thing is to show your appreciation and celebrate your friendship with the groom. Choose a gift that reflects your relationship and will create lasting memories.
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Gift ideas
While it is not required for the best man to buy a gift for the groom, it is a nice gesture to show appreciation for being chosen as the best man. The gift should reflect the groom's interests and personality. It can be something small or symbolic, like a heartfelt note or a unique token of their friendship. Here are some gift ideas for the best man to give to the groom:
- Personalised Pocket Watch: Engrave it with the groom's initials or a special message.
- Cufflinks: Choose a design that matches the wedding theme or add a personal touch with the groom's initials.
- Wristwatch: Personalise it by engraving the case or the strap.
- Leather Wallet: Add a heartfelt message or the groom's initials to a high-quality leather wallet.
- Grooming Kit: Opt for a set with premium grooming essentials, such as a razor, shaving cream, and a grooming brush.
- Cigars: If the groom enjoys them, a set of cigars can be a nice touch.
- Custom Artwork: Commission a custom artwork piece that represents a special memory between the best man and the groom.
- Engraved Whiskey Decanter Set: If the groom enjoys whiskey, personalise a decanter set with glasses by engraving his name and the wedding date.
- Personalised Photo Album: Create a photo album filled with memories shared with the groom, including pictures and heartfelt messages.
- Customised Map: Choose a map that holds significance for the groom, such as his hometown or a place close to his heart.
- Custom Bar Sign: Gift the groom a personalised bar sign with his name or a humorous message if he enjoys hosting gatherings.
- Gaming Console or Accessories: Enhance the groom's gaming experience with a gaming console or accessories.
- Adventure Experience: Plan an adventure day for the groom, such as a hot air balloon ride or a thrilling driving experience.
- Book Subscription: Sign the groom up for a book subscription service to explore his literary interests.
- Astronomy Gift: For a stargazing groom, consider gifting a telescope or organising a stargazing experience.
- Tool Set: A high-quality tool set is a practical gift for a groom who enjoys DIY projects or home improvements.
- Gourmet Food Basket: Treat the groom to a luxurious gourmet food basket filled with delectable treats, fine cheeses, and premium wines or craft beers.
- Cooking Class Experience: Arrange a cooking class for the groom or a couple's experience for the newlyweds to celebrate their love of food.
- Personalised Cutting Board or Knives: Engrave the groom's name or a meaningful message on a cutting board or knife set for a practical yet sentimental gift.
- Wine Tasting Tour: Indulge the groom's love for wine with a visit to a local vineyard or wine region.
- Barbecue Grill Set: For grill masters, include essential tools like tongs, a spatula, and a basting brush, all personalised for an extra thoughtful touch.
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When to give the gift
When it comes to giving the gift, timing is everything. It is customary for the best man to give the groom a gift on the morning of the wedding. The best man typically spends the morning with the groom, so it is the perfect opportunity to give a gift. It is also a good idea to give the gift before the wedding, at the rehearsal dinner or bachelor party.
If the best man is unable to give the gift in person, it is best not to send it by mail. Gifts should be bought at least a month in advance to avoid last-minute stress and limited options.
The gift should be presented in a thoughtful way, perhaps with a nice gift box or wrapping paper, and a handwritten note or card. It is also a good idea to include a small token or trinket that symbolises your friendship.
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How much to spend
There is no set amount that the best man should spend on a gift for the groom, and the amount spent will depend on the budget of the best man and the level of their relationship with the groom. It is not uncommon for the best man to spend a significant amount on the groom before the wedding, such as for tux rental, the bachelor party, and hotel rooms. Therefore, it is not expected for the best man to give a large gift to the groom.
Some sources suggest that the best man should spend between $35 to $45 on the groom, with an average spend of $37 per person. However, this amount can vary depending on the wedding's location and cultural background. For example, in New York City, the standard gift amount for a wedding guest is $300, and for a bridal party participant, it is $500. In contrast, in Jersey, the standard gift amount is $300 per couple and $500 for a bridal party participant.
It is important to remember that the thought and effort behind the gift are more important than the price tag. The best man can give a thoughtful and meaningful gift to the groom without spending a large amount of money. The gift can be personalised, such as a custom artwork piece, engraved cufflinks, or a personalised photo album. Alternatively, the best man can treat the groom to an experience, such as an adventure day or a cooking class.
If the best man has the financial means and wants to give the groom a more expensive gift, that is also acceptable. Ultimately, the best man should decide what amount they are comfortable spending and choose a gift that reflects the groom's interests and personality.
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Personalisation
Engraving and Monogramming
Engraving the best man's initials, a special message, or the wedding date on the gift is a timeless way to add a personal touch. This can be done on items such as cufflinks, a pocket watch, a wristwatch, or a money clip. Engraving transforms an ordinary item into a cherished keepsake that the best man can use daily, reminding him of the groom's appreciation and their enduring friendship.
Custom Artwork
Commissioning a custom artwork piece that captures a special moment or memory shared between the groom and the best man is a unique and thoughtful gift idea. It could be a painting, a caricature, or a photo collage that symbolises their bond. Such a gift will undoubtedly be a conversation starter and a lasting reminder of their friendship.
Personalised Barware
For the best man who enjoys a good drink, consider gifting him personalised barware. This could be a set of engraved whiskey glasses, a customised cocktail shaker, or a monogrammed decanter. It adds a stylish and functional touch to his bar cabinet and is a fun way to commemorate the wedding.
Adventure Experiences
If the best man is an adventure seeker, the groom can plan an adventure day as a gift. This could be a hot air balloon ride, rock climbing, or a thrilling driving experience. It is a unique way to create lasting memories together and celebrate their friendship.
Personalised Photo Album
Creating a photo album filled with memories shared between the groom and the best man is a heartfelt gift. Including pictures from their adventures and writing personalised messages to accompany the images will make it a cherished keepsake. It is a wonderful way to reminisce about their friendship and the journey they have shared.
Customised Map
Choosing a map that holds significance for the best man, such as his hometown, the wedding location, or a place close to his heart, can be a thoughtful gift. It could be framed and displayed as a reminder of their shared experiences and the special occasions in their lives.
Personalised Grooming Kit
Opting for a premium grooming kit with the best man's favourite essentials, such as a razor, shaving cream, and a grooming brush, is a practical and thoughtful choice. It shows that the groom wants the best for his friend and appreciates his unique style and self-care routine.
Tickets to Sporting Events
For the sports enthusiast best man, gifting tickets to watch his favourite team from the best seats in the arena is an unforgettable experience. It is a way to create lasting memories and celebrate their shared passion for sports.
Personalised Socks
Printing the wedding date, the best man's role in the ceremony, and his initials on a pair of socks is a fun and unique gift idea. These socks will not only be a source of amusement on the wedding day but will also serve as a memento of the special occasion.
Handwritten Note
Including a handwritten note with the gift elevates the entire experience. It is an opportunity for the groom to express his gratitude, share memories, and let the best man know how much their friendship means to him. A heartfelt message adds a deeply personal touch and transforms an ordinary gift into an extraordinary one.
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Frequently asked questions
While it is not required, it is customary and seen as a thoughtful gesture for the best man to give the groom a gift. This gift is meant to show appreciation and celebrate their friendship.
The best man should give the groom his gift before the wedding, either at the rehearsal dinner, bachelor party, or on the wedding day before the ceremony.
There is no set amount, but a gift in the range of $75 to $150 is generally considered appropriate. The best man can also give a more personalised gift that reflects the groom's interests and hobbies.