A Sister's Bond: Best Man, Unique Role

when best man is groom

It is becoming more common for brides and grooms to break with tradition and ask their siblings to be their 'best person' at their wedding, regardless of gender. This can be a sensitive topic, as some family members may feel that this goes against tradition. However, it is ultimately up to the couple to decide who they want to include in their wedding party, and gender should not be a limiting factor. Including a sibling as a 'best person' can be a wonderful way to honour your family and create a more inclusive wedding party.

Characteristics Values
Attire Tux, bridesmaid dress, or black dress
Role Witness, best "man", "best woman", "best lady", "grooms(wo)man", "man of honour", "grooms(wo)woman"
Speech Sweet and sentimental, short and simple, from the heart, with jokes

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What should the groom's sister wear as best man?

There are no rules when it comes to what the groom's sister should wear as best man, and it's ultimately up to the couple getting married to decide. However, there are a few things to consider when making this decision.

Firstly, it's important to ask the groom's sister what they would like to wear and what they would be most comfortable in. It's also a good idea to consider the wedding theme and dress code when choosing the outfit. For example, if it's a black-tie wedding, the groom's sister might want to wear an evening gown, while a semi-formal wedding could call for a cocktail dress or jumpsuit.

Another thing to keep in mind is coordination with the rest of the wedding party. The groom's sister might want to choose a colour or style that complements the bridesmaids' outfits without clashing or blending in too much. Accessories can also be used to add a stylish touch, such as a statement necklace, comfortable shoes, and a clutch to hold essentials.

Ultimately, the most important thing is that the groom's sister feels comfortable and confident in their outfit. It's a special day for them too, so choosing an outfit that reflects their personal style is key.

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The groom's sister as best man: breaking tradition

The role of the best man is a long-standing tradition in weddings, typically filled by a close male friend or relative of the groom. However, in recent times, there has been a growing trend of grooms choosing their sisters to stand by their side on their wedding day. This non-traditional choice can be a wonderful way to honour the special bond between a brother and sister and celebrate their unique dynamic. In this article, we will explore the idea of the groom's sister as best man, offering guidance and inspiration for those considering this modern approach.

Breaking with Tradition

The role of the best man is steeped in history, with its origins dating back to ancient times. In the past, the best man served as a literal guardian or protector of the groom, ensuring the safe passage of the couple on their wedding day. Over time, the role evolved to include more symbolic duties, such as holding the wedding rings and delivering a speech. While these traditions are still prevalent in modern weddings, the role of the best man is becoming more flexible and inclusive. By choosing his sister as the best man, the groom challenges gender norms and embraces a more contemporary perspective. This non-traditional choice reflects the evolving nature of wedding customs and the desire to create a wedding party that truly represents the couple's values.

Advantages of Having the Groom's Sister as Best Man

Selecting the groom's sister as the best man can offer several advantages. Firstly, it strengthens the sibling bond and showcases the unique and special relationship they share. Secondly, it ensures that a significant person in the groom's life is by his side during this important milestone. Additionally, having his sister as the best man can add a layer of comfort and emotional support for the groom, particularly if he feels anxious about the wedding or is not particularly close to his male friends. This choice also promotes inclusivity and challenges gender stereotypes, sending a powerful message that wedding roles should be assigned based on the strength of the relationship rather than gender norms.

Considerations and Potential Challenges

While having the groom's sister as best man can be a wonderful choice, there are some considerations to keep in mind. Firstly, the groom's sister may prefer to participate in the bridal party activities and wear a dress that coordinates with the bridesmaids. In this case, the groom may want to consider asking a close male friend or relative to take on the duties of the best man while still honouring his sister in a special way during the ceremony. Additionally, it is important to be mindful of family dynamics and potential resistance to this non-traditional choice. As seen in the example of a groom's father expressing disapproval of his son's decision to have his sister as the best man, it is essential to be prepared for differing opinions and to respectfully address any concerns raised by family members.

The decision to have the groom's sister as the best man is a personal choice that reflects the unique dynamics of each wedding party. By breaking with tradition, the groom embraces a modern and inclusive approach, strengthening the sibling bond and challenging gender norms. While there may be considerations and potential challenges, the advantages of having the groom's sister as best man can ultimately create a more meaningful and personalised wedding experience.

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Groom's sister as best man: what to say in a speech

So, your brother has asked you to be his best man—how exciting! Now you need to write your speech. Don't panic, we've got you covered with some tips and tricks to help you write and deliver the perfect best man's speech.

How to Structure Your Speech

First, you'll want to introduce yourself and state your relationship to the groom. If you're the first person giving a speech, start by greeting and welcoming the guests.

Next, break the ice with a joke or a one-liner. Try to do this within the first 25 seconds of your speech. You could talk about how your brother, the evergreen bachelor, is finally getting hitched.

Then, share some stories about your brother. Pick anecdotes from when he was a boy or more recent situations worth mentioning. Share some of his virtues so that everyone will know what a great guy he is.

After that, say a few words about the bride. Tell your new sister-in-law how much she means to you and share some of her most endearing qualities. Be sincere and factual—she will appreciate it more than flowery platitudes.

Now, thank your parents. Share fun childhood memories and thank them for going above and beyond for you. Throw in some escapades you had with your brother—perhaps times when you defied your parents, like binging on midnight chocolate!

Finally, wish the couple well and give them some advice to help them in their marriage. End with a toast, asking everyone to raise their glasses to the newlyweds.

What to Include in Your Speech

Get a laugh early. Making a joke within the first 20 seconds will relax you and your audience. Think about your brother's individual quirks, eccentricities, and habits.

Tell stories about your brother, either from your early days or more recent times, to show what type of person he is. Resist clichés about your brother always being there for you. Instead, tell anecdotes that prove his great qualities and unique characteristics.

Don't forget to mention your brother's new spouse. Avoid platitudes and think about the reasons you've bonded with your new sister (or brother) in law.

You can also make fun of your parents and the way they brought you up. For example: "Remember how they wouldn’t let you eat sugar after 4 p.m.? ‘Well, mom, there’s a magnum of Champagne over there that definitely contains a few grams of sugar and I’m certainly sampling it!"

If your parents have passed away, you can use your speech to honour their absence. Think of how you can bring a smile to everyone’s face, rather than a tear.

What to Avoid

  • Don't add bad memories—keep your speech heartfelt, happy and upbeat.
  • Don't cry too much—it's okay to get sentimental, but moderation is key.
  • Don't make too many jokes—one or two decent jokes that the guests can relate to is enough.
  • Keep your speech to around five minutes—long speeches will bore your guests.
  • Don't mention your brother's exes—this is a new beginning.
  • Stay away from politics, religion, exes, and anything else that would make guests uncomfortable.
  • Be original and avoid cliché or generic words.
  • Don't get too emotional—laugh a lot, be upbeat, and inject some emotion, but maintain a balance.
  • Make sure there's a microphone for you to use.
  • Practice your speech in advance—don't leave it until the wedding day to start practising.

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Groom's sister as best man: how to handle family objections

Grooms sister as best man: how to handle family objections

It is not uncommon for a groom to want to include his sister in his wedding party, and some grooms opt to have their sister as their best (wo)man. This can be a wonderful way to honour the bond between siblings and ensure that the people closest to the groom are by his side on his wedding day.

However, this choice can sometimes be met with objections from family members, particularly older relatives who are set on upholding traditional gender norms. If you are a groom facing objections to your choice of best (wo)man, or you are a family member with concerns about this role being filled by the groom's sister, here are some ways to handle the situation:

  • Accept that traditions are changing: Wedding traditions are evolving, and it is increasingly common for couples to personalise their wedding parties to reflect their unique relationships. A best (wo)man no longer has to be a man, and gender norms no longer dictate who stands by the bride or groom's side.
  • Focus on the couple's happiness: The wedding is about celebrating the love and commitment between two people. As a family member, it is important to respect the couple's wishes and support their choices, even if they differ from what you would have preferred.
  • Communicate: If you are the groom, it is important to communicate your wishes clearly to your family. Explain why you want your sister by your side and how much this means to you. If you are a family member with objections, express your concerns respectfully, but understand that the final decision rests with the couple.
  • Compromise: If the groom's sister is willing, consider a compromise on attire. For example, she could wear a dress in a colour that coordinates with the groomsmen's suits, rather than wearing a suit or a bridesmaid dress.
  • Seek support: If you are the groom and you are facing strong objections, seek support from other family members or friends who understand your perspective. It can be helpful to have allies who can speak up for you or provide a sounding board for your concerns.
  • Set boundaries: If objections become hurtful or disruptive, it may be necessary to set boundaries with the objecting family members. This could involve limiting the amount of time spent with them or minimising their involvement in the wedding planning process.
  • Don't take it personally: If you are the groom's sister, remember that objections are likely rooted in outdated ideas about gender roles and may not be a reflection of how your family feels about you. Try not to take it personally, and focus on your excitement about standing by your brother's side.

Remember, the wedding day is about celebrating the love and commitment between two people. While family dynamics can be complex, finding ways to handle objections with empathy and respect will contribute to a joyful and memorable celebration for all involved.

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Groom's sister as maid of honour: how to avoid overstepping

Grooms sister as maid of honour: how to avoid overstepping

Choosing your maid of honour

It's your wedding day, and you want to be surrounded by the people you love and who love you. It's a day to celebrate your relationship with your partner, and it's also a day to celebrate your other important relationships.

Your maid of honour is someone who will be by your side as you plan your wedding and on the day itself. They are often a close friend or family member, and they will be involved in the planning process, as well as the wedding day itself.

The groom's sister as maid of honour

It is becoming more common for the groom's sister to be the maid of honour at a wedding. This can be a great way to honour the bond between siblings and to include the groom's family in the wedding party.

If you are the groom and you want your sister to be your maid of honour, it is important to discuss this with your partner and your sister. It is also a good idea to talk to your parents, especially if your father has more traditional views on wedding parties.

Avoiding overstepping

  • Discuss it with your partner and your sister: It is important to have an open and honest conversation with your partner and your sister about your wishes. Make sure everyone is on the same page and feels comfortable with the arrangement.
  • Involve your sister in the planning process: If your sister is your maid of honour, include her in the planning process and treat her like any other maid of honour. This will help her feel valued and appreciated.
  • Be mindful of traditional views: If your father or other family members have more traditional views on wedding parties, it is important to respect their perspective. Try to have an open conversation about your wishes and find a compromise that works for everyone.
  • Be sensitive to your sister's feelings: Your sister might feel uncomfortable being the only woman on your side of the wedding party. Discuss this with her and see if there are any ways to make her feel more comfortable, such as having a female friend or relative stand with her during the ceremony.
  • Involve your sister in the bridesmaid activities: Make sure your sister feels included in all the bridesmaid activities, such as the bachelorette party and getting ready together on the wedding day. This will help her feel like part of the team and create a sense of camaraderie.
  • Choose an appropriate outfit: Your sister might feel more comfortable in a suit or a dress that matches the colour scheme of the bridesmaids' dresses. Discuss this with her and find an outfit that makes her feel confident and comfortable.
  • Be mindful of family dynamics: If there are any family dynamics or tensions, try to address them early on. Have open and honest conversations, and find ways to include everyone in a way that feels respectful and comfortable.

Having your groom's sister as your maid of honour can be a wonderful way to honour your relationship and include your future sister-in-law in your wedding celebrations. By communicating openly, being sensitive to everyone's feelings, and involving your sister in the planning process, you can avoid overstepping and ensure that everyone feels valued and respected on your special day.

Best Man's Duties: What You Need to Know

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Frequently asked questions

There are no rules for what the groom's sister should wear if she is the best man. She could wear a bridesmaid dress, a black dress to match the tuxedos, or a dress of her choice in the bridesmaid colour.

The groom's sister should write her speech from the heart. She should share stories that are meaningful to both her and the groom, and talk about the kind of man and brother the groom has become. She should also make the new in-law feel welcome by sharing what she admires about them and why she is grateful that they are joining the family.

The groom should stick to his guns and honour his sister, with whom he shares a deep bond. It is his wedding, not his father's, and it is ultimately his decision who he wants in his wedding party.

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