The Best Man's Speech: Timing And Tradition

when does the best man give his speech

The best man's speech is a wedding reception staple, and while it's not mandatory, it's a great way to celebrate the newlyweds. The best man's speech typically comes at the end of the reception, after the maid of honour's speech. It's a chance to share kind words about the couple and your best friend, with a few jokes and a toast to the happy couple's future. While it can be a daunting task, with a little preparation and a willingness to be vulnerable, you'll be able to deliver a memorable and heartfelt speech.

Characteristics Values
When it takes place Traditionally at the wedding reception following the maid of honour, but sometimes during the rehearsal dinner
Number of speeches One speech either at the wedding reception or, less commonly, the rehearsal dinner
What the speech is about The groom, and the newlyweds through his significant position in their lives. The focus should be on the couple's relationship rather than the best man's relationship with the groom

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The best man's speech should be celebratory and encouraging, with a few jokes

The best man's speech is usually the most anticipated of the wedding reception. It's meant to be celebratory and encouraging, with a few jokes that emphasise the love the couple has for each other. It's also an opportunity to share how you feel about your best friend and their partner. While jokes are a great way to loosen up the crowd, don't make them the main focus of your speech, especially if comedy doesn't come naturally to you.

The best man's speech should be lighthearted and positive, and it's important to keep the couple and their love at the centre. It's also good to be mindful of the audience, which will include guests from different generations and cultures, such as the couple's grandparents and colleagues.

  • Start with a strong opener to grab the audience's attention. You could introduce yourself with a twist, crack a joke, or share a story of how you met the groom.
  • Include a theme or a recurring idea that ties your speech together. This could be a mutual love of sports, college, vacations, or something else that sums up your friendship.
  • Share a few anecdotes about your friendship with the groom, but don't make the whole speech about it. The focus should be on the couple and their relationship.
  • Include some nice words about the groom and his partner. You can share how you feel about their relationship and offer them encouragement and congratulations.
  • End with a best man's toast to the newlyweds, wishing them a happy future together.

Remember, it's okay to be nervous, but practice your speech beforehand and focus your attention on the couple. Keep your speech genuine, positive, and celebratory, and you'll do a great job as the best man!

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It's usually the last in the lineup of reception speeches

The best man's speech is usually the last in the lineup of reception speeches. This is a long-standing tradition, with the father of the bride, the father of the groom or parents of the groom, and the maid of honour all speaking before the best man.

The best man's speech is often the most anticipated, thanks to its depiction in popular culture. It is meant to be celebratory and encouraging, with a few appropriate jokes that emphasise the love the couple has for each other. It is also an opportunity to share some kind words about your relationship with the couple and your best friend.

The best man is traditionally obliged to toast only the newlyweds, but it is common to include a nod to the bridesmaids, too. The best man may also want to mention the groom's family, particularly if he is close with them. However, this is not usually done. If you are planning to mention several groups, it is a good idea to check with the couple to ensure you are not doubling up on toasts.

The best man's speech should be brief and snappy, with a positive message that celebrates the newlyweds. It is also a good idea to tie the toast into a theme or running joke from earlier in the speech.

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It should be given after the maid of honour's speech

The best man's speech is an important part of a wedding reception. It is a chance for the best man to share some kind words about his relationship with the couple and offer a unique insight into the couple's relationship. The best man's speech is usually highly anticipated and is meant to kick off the party.

There are several reasons why the best man's speech should be given after the maid of honour's speech. Firstly, it allows the best man to build on any jokes or stories told by the maid of honour and create a cohesive narrative. By following the maid of honour, the best man can create a sense of continuity and ensure the reception flows smoothly.

Additionally, having the best man speak after the maid of honour can help to create a sense of balance and equality in the wedding proceedings. It ensures that both the bride and groom are equally represented and celebrated. This can be especially important if the couple chooses to have a more modern wedding with a non-traditional speech order.

Furthermore, giving the best man's speech after the maid of honour allows for a natural progression in terms of content and tone. The best man can build on the sentiments expressed by the maid of honour and add his own perspective. This can create a more dynamic and engaging experience for the guests.

Finally, having the best man speak after the maid of honour can help to manage the timing of the reception. By spacing out the speeches, the best man can ensure that his speech does not become too long or overwhelming for the guests. It also allows for a more relaxed atmosphere, as the best man can take into account the mood and energy of the room after the maid of honour's speech.

In conclusion, having the best man's speech after the maid of honour's speech can enhance the overall flow and enjoyment of the wedding reception. It allows for a well-paced event, with a good balance of celebration and sentiment. By following the maid of honour, the best man can create a cohesive and engaging experience for the happy couple and their guests.

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It's not obligatory to give a speech if you're uncomfortable with public speaking

Being the best man at a wedding is a tremendous honour, but it's also a role that comes with a lot of responsibilities. One of the most important tasks is giving a speech at the wedding reception. However, public speaking can be a daunting prospect for many people, and it's completely understandable if you feel uncomfortable about it. It's not obligatory to give a speech if you're not comfortable with public speaking, and there are several alternatives you can consider. Here are some options to explore:

Option 1: Be Honest and Keep it Short

Firstly, remember that it's perfectly fine to feel nervous about public speaking. Many people dread it and feel anxious about standing up in front of others. If you decide to go ahead with the speech, you can be honest about your nerves and keep your speech short and sweet. Cover the basics, add a sprinkle of humour, and you'll be done in no time! Introduce yourself, welcome everyone, and perhaps share a funny or heartfelt story about your friendship with the groom. You can also express your delight and best wishes for the newlyweds, and finish with a short toast to the happy couple.

Option 2: Swap Roles or Share the Spotlight

If you feel you cannot give a speech, it's essential to communicate this to the couple. You can suggest swapping roles with someone else in the wedding party or even the groom's father. This way, you can still be part of the wedding as an usher or groomsman, and someone else can take on the responsibility of the speech. Alternatively, you can share the spotlight by having a joint speech with another groomsman or a close friend. This way, you won't feel the pressure of speaking alone, and you can both celebrate the couple together.

Option 3: Write a Speech or Letter

If you prefer not to speak publicly, you can offer to write a speech or a letter for the couple. This way, you can express your thoughts and well wishes without having to deliver them verbally. You can even ask someone else to deliver the speech on your behalf, such as another groomsman or a friend. This option allows you to contribute meaningfully without having to stand up in front of everyone.

Option 4: Record a Video or Create a Slideshow

Another creative alternative is to record a video message or create a slideshow with photos and music. You can make it fun and quirky, or even involve other friends to share their congratulations and stories. This option allows you to participate in a way that feels comfortable for you while also providing the couple with a heartfelt keepsake from their special day.

Option 5: Opt for a More Intimate Setting

If you feel more at ease in a smaller setting, you can suggest giving a speech at the rehearsal dinner instead of the wedding reception. With a smaller crowd, you may feel less intimidated and more able to share your thoughts. Additionally, you can opt for a more casual approach, such as giving a toast during cocktail hour when guests are mingling and relaxing.

Remember, the most important thing is to communicate your feelings and work together with the couple to find a solution that suits everyone. Your role as the best man is significant, and your contribution to the wedding can take various forms. By being honest about your discomfort with public speaking, you can explore these alternatives and still be an integral part of the wedding celebrations.

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The best man should toast the newlyweds and can also thank the bridesmaids

The best man's speech is a chance to say some kind words about your relationship with the couple and your best friend. It is meant to be quick, lighthearted, and celebratory.

The best man traditionally toasts the newlyweds at the end of his speech, wishing them a happy future together. This is also an opportunity to thank the bridesmaids, though this is usually done by the groom. If the groom is not making a speech, or you just want to express your gratitude, including a mention of the bridesmaids in your toast is a lovely gesture. You can simply say:

> "The beautiful bridesmaids have been amazing. Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you all to raise your glasses. I give you... the bridesmaids."

> "I would like to say a special thank you to the bridesmaids, who have been wonderful throughout the day. Ladies and gentlemen, please raise your glasses."

The best man's speech should focus on the couple and their relationship, rather than your friendship with the groom. It is a chance to share your unique insight into their bond and offer a few appropriate jokes that emphasise their love for each other.

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Frequently asked questions

No, it is not necessary. Some couples choose to forgo speeches altogether, and in some cases, the best man may opt-out due to discomfort with public speaking.

The best man's speech typically takes place during the wedding reception, about 3/4 of the way through the meal. This timing ensures that guests are settled and have their undivided attention while also leaving room for festivities afterward.

Traditionally, the best man speaks after the maid of honor. However, the order may vary depending on the couple's preferences and the strength of the speakers.

It is recommended to keep the best man's speech brief, with a maximum duration of around 3 to 5 minutes. This helps maintain the flow of the reception and ensures the speech does not become tedious for the guests.

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