The role of a ring bearer is usually given to a young child, often between the ages of three and eight. They are responsible for carrying the wedding rings down the aisle during the ceremony, usually on a decorative pillow, and passing them to the best man or officiant. While it is not essential to have a ring bearer, it is a wonderful way to involve a special someone in your big day. As a member of the wedding party, it is customary to give the ring bearer a gift, such as a personalised memento or a fun toy.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Age | Between 3 and 8 years old |
Gender | Traditionally boys, but can be girls or pets |
Who they give the rings to | Best man or best woman, or another person of honour |
What they carry the rings on | Pillow, ring box, briefcase, sword, flower crown, or collar |
Whether they carry real rings | Depends on the couple's preference |
What they wear | Tuxedo, suit, flannel shirt and trousers, mini version of the groom's suit, bow tie, suspenders, etc. |
Who pays for their outfit | The ring bearer or their parents |
Whether they should receive a gift | Yes |
Gift ideas | Sunglasses, socks, stuffed animal, small toy, personalised t-shirt, yo-yo, football, watch, etc. |
What You'll Learn
Gifts for the ring bearer
It is customary to give a gift to the ring bearer as a token of appreciation for their role in the wedding. Here are some gift ideas for the ring bearer, both as a proposal gift and a thank-you gift:
Proposal Gifts
- A personalized cape with their name, a logo, and their role as the protector of the rings.
- A picture book about a ring bearer to teach them about their role and get them excited.
- A ring bearer teddy bear with a shirt personalized with their name, role, and the wedding date.
- A ring bearer puzzle with their name, a bowtie, a car, and a pair of rings.
- A ring security t-shirt to wear at the wedding shower, rehearsal dinner, or even down the aisle.
- Personalized sunglasses to be worn on the wedding day.
- A ring bearer tote bag with their name, role, and a bow tie.
- A personalized tumbler with their name and wedding role.
- A bowtie to make them look extra dashing on the big day.
- A ring bearer proposal baseball with a message asking them to be your ring bearer.
Thank-You Gifts
- A personalized wooden hanger with their role and name to reserve their space in the getting-ready suite and save as a keepsake.
- A pair of pajamas so they can rest after the wedding festivities.
- A shark-shaped blanket that is fun and cozy for movie nights or when they need a break from dancing at the reception.
- A personalized LED night light to keep away monsters and add to their bedroom collection.
- A Mickey Mouse three-piece gift set with a cufflink, lapel pin, and tie bar to finish their outfit on the wedding day.
- A watch, a classic gift idea that they can use and cherish for a long time.
- A personalized glass picture frame etched with their name and title to display their favorite wedding photo.
- A Technic McLaren Senna GTR 42123 toy model with realistic features to spark their imagination and keep them entertained.
- A personalized football with a custom message to play with, but not too close to the wedding cake!
- A dinosaur backpack to carry their toys and knick-knacks, which can be used long after the wedding.
- A custom message handkerchief with a sweet poem about their role, signed by the couple, to add a dashing touch to their formal attire.
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What the ring bearer wears
The most common approach is for the ring bearer to wear a miniature version of the groom's outfit, including the tuxedo jacket, pants, vest, shirt, shoes, bow tie or long tie, pocket square, studs and cufflinks. This allows the ring bearer to stand out from the groomsmen while still tying into the groom's look. Alternatively, the ring bearer can wear the same as the groomsmen, making him a miniature version of the rest of the wedding party. In this case, the groomsmen’s accessories, such as the long tie, bow tie and pocket square, can be matched with the colour of the bridesmaids' dresses.
If the ring bearer is too small for a tuxedo, another option is to dress them in trousers, a shirt, a bow tie, suspenders and shoes. If the child is even smaller, they can wear just the trousers with a shirt, little bow tie, suspenders and shoes. For toddlers, a toddler's tuxedo with matching shoes can be purchased, although this is less common.
The parents of the ring bearer usually pay for their child's attire, but the bride and groom may choose to purchase the outfit as a gift. It is important to give the parents a few options to choose from, considering their budget and style preferences.
Who Can Be a Ring Bearer?
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Who can be a ring bearer
A ring bearer is a role traditionally given to a young boy, usually between the ages of three and eight. However, this role can be performed by anyone, including girls, adults, and pets.
The ring bearer is usually a close family member such as the nephew of the bride, godchild of the groom, or second cousin. They can also be the child of the maid of honour, best man, or another close friend. If the couple has children, this is a great way to include them in the wedding.
If you don't want to include children in your wedding, you can choose an adult friend or family member to be the ring bearer. This could be a fun way to involve grandparents or older relatives.
Another option is to include your pet in the ceremony as the ring bearer. Dogs and cats can be dressed up for the occasion and carry the rings on a pillow or in a box attached to their collar.
The main duty of the ring bearer is to present the wedding rings to the bride and groom during the ceremony. This is a significant responsibility, so it is important to choose someone who is comfortable with the role and can handle the pressure.
If you are worried about entrusting a young child with expensive wedding rings, you can have them carry fake rings while the best man holds the real ones. It is also a good idea to brief the ring bearer before the wedding so they know what to do and when to walk down the aisle.
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The history of ring bearers
Another theory suggests that the tradition originated in the Medieval era, where Northern Europeans would present the bride with her wedding ring on the tip of a sword. Wealthy families replaced the swords with pillows as a symbol of their riches, as pillows were rare during this time. The ring bearer would also hold the bride's train and a prayer book as they walked down the aisle.
In the Victorian era, boys' suits for ring bearers consisted of velvet jackets, short trousers, and round linen collars. The role grew in popularity during this time, and the outfits often included large bows of white crepe used to fasten the collar.
Today, the ring bearer's role is flexible, and they may carry a pillow, scrolls with messages, or nothing at all. The tradition of having a young boy perform this duty continues, though some couples choose to have a young girl or even their pet as the ring bearer.
Attaching Rings to the Ring Bearer Pillow
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What the ring bearer does
A ring bearer is a wedding party role that is typically given to young children, usually between the ages of 3 and 8. They are one of the youngest members of the wedding party and are responsible for carrying the couple's wedding rings down the aisle during the ceremony. The ring bearer usually precedes the bride down the aisle, often walking at the same time as the flower girl, and gives the rings to either the best man or the wedding officiant once they reach the altar.
The ring bearer walks down the aisle with a ring bearer pillow in hand, although this is not required. The rings can be secured to a ribbon tied around a poem or scripture, placed in a bouquet, or carried in a briefcase. The couple decides whether the ring bearer carries the real wedding rings or not, and it is usually based on the child's age and maturity level.
The ring bearer is usually a boy, but the role can be given to a girl or a non-binary person. The ring bearer can also be an adult friend or family member, or even a pet. If the ring bearer is a child, their parents are typically responsible for paying for their outfit and accessories, as well as attending all the pre-wedding festivities and arriving early on the wedding day. The ring bearer may stand at the altar with the rest of the wedding party or sit with their parents, depending on their age.
The ring bearer is not a necessary part of the wedding ceremony, but they add a special touch and are a crowd-pleaser. They are usually chosen from among the couple's close family members or friends, such as the nephew of the bride, godchild of the groom, or child of the maid of honour. It is important to speak to the child's parents and ensure that they are willing to take on the responsibility of having their child be the ring bearer.
Who Walks the Ring Bearer Down the Aisle?
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Frequently asked questions
Traditionally, ring bearers are between the ages of three and eight years old. This age range ensures the child is mature enough to handle the ring-bearing role. However, you can choose a child younger than three but should speak with the child's parents first to see if they can escort the child down the aisle. If you want to have a child that's 10 years old or older, consider giving them a junior groomsman role.
The ring bearer's outfit should be consistent with the rest of the wedding party. Choose an outfit within the same colour scheme and match the level of formality. If you're choosing an outfit for a young child, be sure to consider what they'll be most comfortable in.
In a traditional wedding ceremony order, the ring bearer walks down the aisle with a ring bearer pillow in hand and gives the rings to the wedding officiant or best man once they reach the altar. Depending on the ring bearer's age, they can then stand at the altar with the rest of the wedding party or sit with their parents.
As a member of the wedding party, it's customary for a ring bearer to receive a gift. If your ring bearer is a child, consider gifting them something they can wear on the day of the wedding, like a fun pair of sunglasses or quirky socks. If they're an older child or an adult, you can give them a personalised memento, like an engraved picture frame.