Writing Wedding Invitations: What To Include And How

Wedding invitations are an important part of the planning process, as they are one of the first things your guests will see and touch. They should convey critical information about the wedding, such as the names of the couple, the date, time, and location of the ceremony, as well as the hosts of the wedding and the tone and formality of the event. Here are some tips on what to include and how to word your wedding invitations.

Who to Name as the Host

The host line is the first thing your guests will see on your wedding invitation. Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts of the wedding, but nowadays, the groom's parents, the couple themselves, or a combination of all three are also common. The hosts are usually the people who are paying for the wedding.

If you are following tradition and the bride's parents are hosting, their names should come first, followed by the bride's name and then the groom's. If the groom's parents are hosting, the groom's name should come first, followed by the bride's.

If both sets of parents are hosting, you can list the bride's parents' names first, followed by the groom's, or list the parents' names in alphabetical order.

If the couple is hosting, you can skip the host line or start with a welcoming introduction, such as "Together with full hearts" or "With hearts full of love and joy".

For same-sex couples, the traditional rule of the woman's name first does not apply, so go with what sounds better or is more aesthetically pleasing.

If you want to include the name of a deceased parent, you can add this after the bride or groom's name, for example: "Lauren Martinez, daughter of Marta Martinez and the late Robert Martinez".

For divorced parents, include the mother's name first, followed by the father's name on a separate line. If you want to include a stepparent, keep them on the same line as their partner.

If you have a non-traditional family structure, don't let this part of the invitation trip you up. Get creative with your wording! For example, if you have step-parents, you could write: "Mr. & Mrs. Flores, Mr. & Mrs. Hill, Mr. & Mrs. Byrne and Mr. & Mrs. Lin request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of Talia Flores & Stephen Byrne".

How to Address the Hosts

When addressing the hosts, be sure to capitalise proper names and titles, and use courtesy titles such as "Mr." and "Mrs.". Avoid using punctuation, except after courtesy titles, and avoid abbreviations. For very formal invitations, include middle names.

What to Include in the Host Line

In addition to the hosts' names, the host line should include a proper request for the guests' presence at the wedding. Traditionally, couples would use formal wording to denote a religious ceremony, whereas modern celebrations tend to use more casual language.

• "request the honour of your presence" (the British spelling of "honour" traditionally indicates a formal, religious ceremony)
• "request the pleasure of your company"
• "invite you to celebrate with them"
• "would love for you to join them"

How to Request Attendance

The request line is where you invite your guests to join your wedding celebration. Traditionally, couples would include formal wording in the request line to denote a formal religious ceremony, whereas wedding invitations for modern celebrations tend to use more casual language.

• "Request the honour of your presence"
• "Request the pleasure of your company"
• "Invite you to join"
• "Please join us to celebrate"
• "Love the pleasure of your company"
• "Would love for you to join them"
• "Invite you to celebrate with them"
• "The honour of your presence"

If the wedding is taking place in a church or another house of worship, the British spelling of "honour" can be used to indicate this.

If you are hosting a casual wedding, feel free to explore modern and playful phrasing.

Examples

Formal Wedding Invitation Wording

• "Request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Talia Camila Flores to Stephen Anthony Byrne"
• "Request the pleasure of your company at the celebration of their union"

Casual Wedding Invitation Wording

• "Talia Flores and Stephen Byrne invite you to a celebration of their love and commitment"
• "Together with their parents Talia Flores & Stephen Byrne invite you to share in their joy as they tie the knot"

Fun Wedding Invitation Wording

• "John and Betty Smith invite you to raise a glass at the marriage of their son Jack Alexander to Mason Jacob Kim"
• "Come party with us Jack Alexander Smith and Mason Jacob Kim are tying the knot"

Creative Wedding Invitation Wording

• "It's a wedding! John and Eliza Smith invite you to celebrate their son Jack Alexander as he weds Mason Jacob Kim"
• "Good food, good drinks, good friends Jack Smith & Mason Kim Request you celebrate with them as they get hitched"

Couple's Names

When it comes to addressing wedding invitations, there are a few things to consider to ensure you're following the correct etiquette. Here are some detailed guidelines specifically for addressing envelopes to couples:

Married Couple with the Same Last Name:

For a heterosexual couple, the outer envelope can be addressed as "Mr. and Mrs. [Full Name of Husband]". For same-sex couples, either name can go first. On the inner envelope, you can write "Mr. and Mrs. [Last Name]" or use their first names. If the couple prefers to have their names separate, the outer envelope can be addressed as "Mr. [Husband's Full Name] and Mrs. [Wife's Full Name]".

Married Couple with Different Last Names:

Write their full names on the same line on the outer envelope, with the woman's name first. If the names are too long, list them separately. On the inner envelope, use their titles and last names or just their first names.

Married Couple with One Hyphenated Last Name:

Address the outer envelope with their full names, using "Mr." for both individuals. On the inner envelope, use "Mr." followed by their last names or first names.

Unmarried Couple:

For couples who live at the same address, list their full names on one line on the outer envelope, with the person you are closest to, or the person whose name comes first alphabetically, listed first. On the inner envelope, use their titles and last names or just their first names.

Same-Sex Couple:

For same-sex couples, the traditional rule of the woman's name coming first does not apply. Alphabetical order or what sounds better can be used instead.

Couple with Distinguished Titles:

If one or both individuals have distinguished titles, such as doctors, military personnel, judges, or lawyers, include these in the address. The person with the higher-ranking title should be named first, regardless of gender.

Modern Alternatives:

If you feel that personal titles may be restrictive or exclusive for your guest list, you can choose to forgo them and use first and last names only. You can also use "Mx." for non-binary guests or if you are unsure of an individual's preferred title. Remember to double-check each attendee's preferred personal titles beforehand if you plan to include them.

Date, Time and Location

The date, time, and location are essential details to include in your wedding invitation. Here are some tips and examples to help you word this section effectively:

Date and Time:

For formal invitations, it is customary to spell out the date, time, and day of the week in full. For example:

> Saturday, the seventeenth of August two thousand twenty-four at half after four in the afternoon

Using numerals for the date and time is more common in modern or casual invitations:

> Saturday, 8/17/2024, 4:30 p.m.

If you opt for numerals, choose a legible font to avoid confusion (e.g., between "2" and "5"). Also, avoid using a.m. or p.m. for formal invitations and instead use phrases like "in the morning," "in the afternoon," or "in the evening."

Location:

Provide the name and full street address of the venue, including the city, state, and zip code. If your wedding is abroad, be sure to include the country as well. For formal weddings, spell out the state name.

The street address is usually not needed unless its omission may cause confusion or if the wedding is at a private residence. Here is an example of how to format the location:

> Arctic Club Hotel, 700 Third Avenue, Seattle, Washington

If the ceremony and reception are at the same venue, you can simply state: "Reception to follow." If the reception is at a different location, include the full address on a separate line or a separate insert card.

Hosted by One Set of Parents (Formal):

> Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Timothy Williams request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Sophia Anne Devine to Matthew Paul Johnson on Saturday, the sixteenth of October two thousand and ten, at four o'clock in the afternoon, at Our Lady of the Sacred Heart, Randwick, Sydney. Reception to follow at six o'clock in the evening at The Argyle, The Rocks, Sydney.

Hosted by Both Sets of Parents (Casual):

> With great pleasure, Kimberly and Jonathan Biel and Lynn Bomar Harless and Randall Timberlake invite you to celebrate the marriage of their children Jessica and Justin on October 19, 2012, at four o'clock in the afternoon, at Borgo Egnazia Resort, 72015 Savelletri di Fasano BR, Italy. Dress as you wish, dine as you like, dance as you please.

Hosted by the Couple (Formal):

> The honor of your presence is requested at the marriage of Talia Camila Flores and Stephen Anthony Byrne on Saturday, the eleventh of June two thousand and twenty-three, at twelve o'clock in the afternoon, at the Arctic Club Hotel, 700 Third Avenue, Seattle, Washington. Reception to follow.

Hosted by the Couple (Casual):

> Talia Flores and Stephen Byrne invite you to a celebration of their love and commitment on June 11, 2024, at 12:00 pm, at the Arctic Club Hotel, 700 Third Avenue, Seattle, Washington. Dinner and dancing to follow.

Dress Code and RSVP

The dress code and RSVP details are optional additions to your wedding invitation but can be helpful for your guests. If you are including them, here are some ideas for how to word them.

Dress Code

The dress code is usually included in the lower right-hand corner of the invitation. If you don't include this information, your guests will infer the dress code from the formality of the invitation itself. For example, a very fancy invitation will likely lead to guests anticipating a formal, black-tie affair. Conversely, a simpler invite suggests wedding attire that leans more casual.

• Black-tie (tuxedos and floor-length gowns)
• Formal attire (suits and dresses)
• Cocktail attire (suits or dress shirts with ties and cocktail dresses)
• Beach-casual (long- or short-sleeve shirts with pants or shorts, sundresses, and sandals)

RSVP

RSVP cards are a great way to get an accurate headcount for your big day. You can also have people RSVP via your wedding website. If that's the case, include the website address on a separate card.

On the RSVP card, include specific instructions about the number of guests they are allowed to bring and how they should respond. If you expect them to be mailed back to you, it is courteous to include a stamped envelope.

Your RSVP card should include a reply-by date that occurs at least three weeks before the wedding. This will allow you to give a final headcount to the caterer and fill out your seating chart.

• "Kindly reply by [date]"
• "The favour of a reply is requested by [date]"
• "The pleasure of your company is requested. Kindly respond by [date]"
• "The honour of your presence is requested. Please respond by [date]"
• "Please respond by [date]"

Frequently asked questions