Gifts And Gestures: Brides' Guide To Thanking Bridesmaids

Being a bridesmaid is an honour and a fun experience, but it can also be a lot of hard work. The role of a bridesmaid is to support and assist the bride before, during, and after the wedding. While there are no set guidelines for the role, there are several duties and responsibilities that are typically expected of a bridesmaid. These include helping with wedding planning, offering emotional support, and participating in pre-wedding events such as the bachelorette party and bridal shower. On the wedding day, bridesmaids are expected to assist the bride in getting ready, walk down the aisle, carry her bouquet, and join the couple on the dance floor. It is also common for bridesmaids to be responsible for their own transportation, accommodation, and attire costs. Effective communication, flexibility, and a positive attitude are key to being a great bridesmaid.

Plan the bachelorette party

Planning a bachelorette party can be a big task, but it's also a lot of fun. Here's a step-by-step guide to help you plan an amazing party for the bride-to-be.

Choose a Guest List

The guest list should include the bridal party, and any other close friends or family members the bride wants to invite. It's important to remember that only people invited to the wedding should be invited to the bachelorette party. Once you have your list, be sure to collect everyone's contact information, including names, emails, and phone numbers.

Select a Location

Decide if the bachelorette party will be local or a destination celebration. Consider the time of year and the types of activities the group will enjoy. Local parties are usually more affordable, as guests won't have to pay for flights or expensive accommodations, and there's more budget available for activities. Destination parties, on the other hand, can be a great excuse to treat yourselves and visit a new place.

Set a Budget

Before consulting the guests, research the big group costs like accommodations, travel, meals, and activities. This will help the invitees plan and ensure there are no surprises when it comes to finances. It's important to be mindful of everyone's budget, especially as they may also be budgeting for other pre-wedding costs like attire, beauty treatments, and wedding gifts.

Book Accommodations

Once you have the date and guest list confirmed, it's time to book your accommodations. Renting a house or apartment is often a better option than individual hotel rooms, as it provides a shared space for the group to hang out and relax. It's also a good idea to collect payments from guests for accommodations and pre-booked events upfront, so you don't have to front all the costs yourself.

Choose a Theme

Themes are optional, but they can be a fun addition to the party. The theme can be as simple or extravagant as you like and should reflect the bride's personality and interests. For example, if she loves glitter and dancing, a disco theme is perfect. Or, if she's a big fan of Taylor Swift, plan a party inspired by her music.

Plan the Activities

For a weekend bachelorette, a mix of high and low-energy activities is ideal. Space out the bigger events and leave time for downtime, meals, and drinks. When brainstorming activities, consider the bride's hobbies, personality, and interests. At a minimum, plan one big event that feels like a treat for the bride, whether it's a night of dancing, a spa day, or something else entirely.

Get a Gift for the Bride

Traditionally, each bachelorette brings a small gift for the bride, often lingerie. However, the bride or host may request something different or suggest going in together on a larger gift. A fun and budget-friendly option is a "panty drop," where each guest brings a different pair of underwear.

Finalize the Details

A few days before the bachelorette, pick up groceries and snacks for the group. If you're the main planner, you can also assign this task to another member of the party. Don't forget to keep the receipts for the final budget! When it comes to decorations, less is often more, so choose just a couple of areas to decorate, and focus on creating a fun and festive atmosphere.

Celebrate!

You've done all the planning, now it's time to enjoy the party and celebrate the bride!

Be a sounding board for ideas

Being a bridesmaid is a big honour and a lot of fun, but it can also be hard work. One of the most important roles a bridesmaid can play is to be a sounding board for ideas. This means being a good listener and offering support and assistance to the bride. Here are some ways to do this:

Offer Emotional Support

Be there for the bride during moments of tension and stress. Wedding planning can be overwhelming, so it's important to provide a calm and caring presence for the bride. This might involve checking in with her regularly and offering practical help. Be specific about what you can do to assist her, rather than asking generally what needs to be done.

Help with Decision-Making

The bride may value your opinion when it comes to choosing her wedding attire, flowers, or decorations. Offer honest and constructive feedback to help her make decisions. If you have concerns about any aspect of the wedding, such as the bridesmaid dress, communicate these early on. It's important to be respectful of the bride's vision while also ensuring your own comfort and boundaries are respected.

Attend Dress Shopping and Fittings

Make yourself available to accompany the bride on dress shopping trips and fittings. This is a fun part of being a bridesmaid, and your presence and input will be invaluable to the bride. If you are unable to attend, be sure to communicate this to the bride in advance.

Assist with Planning and DIY Tasks

Offer to help the bride with any planning tasks or DIY projects she is working on. This could include addressing envelopes, maintaining the RSVP list, or helping with wedding decor. Be proactive and ask the bride directly how you can best assist her.

Be a Good Listener

Remember that the bride may need a friend to listen to her concerns, fears, and excitements during this time. Be available to grab a drink, go for coffee, or have a phone call to provide moral support. Be a tower of strength and a sounding board for the bride as she navigates the wedding planning process.

Help the bride get dressed

Helping the bride get dressed is one of the most important duties of a bridesmaid. Here are some tips to ensure everything runs smoothly:

In the lead-up to the wedding

As a bridesmaid, you should make yourself available for wedding dress shopping and fittings. The bride will likely value your opinion and appreciate your support in choosing her attire. It's also a good idea to familiarise yourself with the wedding timeline, including when the bride will be getting ready on the day. This will help you plan and ensure you're prepared for any potential hiccups.

On the wedding day

Wake up early and be on time to help the bride get ready. Keep the atmosphere upbeat and ensure she eats breakfast. Help her into her dress and assist with shoes and jewellery. If her dress is particularly elaborate, she may need your help throughout the day, such as when she needs to use the restroom or when she changes into a different outfit for the reception. You can also assist with fixing her veil and train throughout the day, such as before she walks down the aisle or during photo shoots.

After the wedding

You can help the bride out of her dress and pack it carefully to prevent any damage. You might also offer to do her hair and makeup for any day-after celebrations.

Be there for moral support

Being a bride can be stressful, so it's important to be there for your bridesmaids emotionally. "Providing emotional support is also central, ensuring the bride feels calm and cared for while planning such a momentous occasion," says Aleah Valley, co-founder of Valley & Company Events.

• Be available and present. Offer your help early on and throughout the entire planning process.
• Listen to your bridesmaids' concerns and be there for moral support.
• Make time to meet for coffee or do something more impactful, like writing funny wedding party bios for the couple's wedding website.
• Check in with your bridesmaids and spend time with them during the wedding adventure.
• Take things off their to-do list.
• Help your bridesmaids with their wedding day attire. In most cases, you'll give them guidelines about what to wear, and you might even go shopping as a group.
• Be positive and stay upbeat.

Attend dress fittings

As a bridesmaid, it's important to be there for the bride and support her throughout the entire planning process. This includes helping her choose her wedding attire. Bridesmaids are often asked to attend dress fittings and offer their opinions and support. Here are some tips to keep in mind when attending dress fittings:

• Make yourself available: Try to keep your schedule flexible and be available for the bride whenever she needs you. Dress fittings are an important part of the wedding planning process, and your presence can make a big difference.
• Offer honest feedback: The bride values your opinion, so be sure to give honest and constructive feedback during the dress fittings. Your input can help her make informed decisions and feel confident in her choices.
• Be supportive: Wedding planning can be stressful, and the bride may appreciate your emotional support during dress fittings. Be there to listen to her concerns and offer encouragement.
• Help with practical tasks: In addition to providing emotional support, offer practical help. This could include taking notes on the dress alterations needed, helping the bride get in and out of dresses, or taking photos for reference.
• Be mindful of the bride's preferences: Remember that each bride is unique and may have specific expectations. Communicate with her to understand her vision and preferences, and respect her choices.
• Have fun: Dress fittings are also an opportunity to create memorable moments with the bride and other bridesmaids. Enjoy the process, celebrate your friend, and make it a positive experience for everyone involved.

Frequently asked questions