My Bridesmaids, My Support, My Happily Ever After

Bridesmaids are a staple of the traditional wedding, but more and more brides are choosing to forgo this custom. There are many reasons for this, from budget constraints to avoiding drama and not wanting to leave anyone out. While some may worry about upsetting their friends, many will be relieved not to have to spend a fortune on a dress they'll never wear again. Ultimately, it's up to the couple to decide which traditions to follow and create a day that reflects their personality and values.

Bridesmaids can be expensive

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it's also a big responsibility that comes with a lot of expenses. According to a WeddingWire study, the cost of being a bridesmaid is about $1,200 per wedding, but that can quickly increase to over $1,800. This cost includes the bridesmaid dress, travel to and from the wedding, hair and makeup, and more. If you're a bridesmaid in multiple weddings, these costs can really add up!

The average bridesmaid spends $208 on a dress, which is quite a lot for something you may only wear once. Bridesmaid dresses frequently need alterations too, which can cost an additional $70. To save money, many brides are now allowing their bridesmaids to choose their own dresses within a specified colour scheme, so they can select a style they're more likely to wear again.

Nearly 80% of bridesmaids buy new shoes to wear with their dress, and over 60% buy additional accessories. On average, bridesmaids spend $120 on these accessories. However, these costs can be reduced by wearing shoes the bridesmaid already owns or borrowing accessories.

If the bride requires her bridesmaids to have their hair and makeup done professionally, she should cover these costs. However, if the choice is left up to the bridesmaids, they can pay for professional hair and makeup themselves if they wish. On average, a bridesmaid will pay $72 for wedding hair and $60 for makeup.

Travel costs for a bridesmaid can vary depending on the wedding's location. A bridesmaid spends an average of $115 on travel to the wedding destination and $205 on accommodation. These costs can be reduced if the couple books hotel room blocks or negotiates a group rate with an air carrier.

A big part of being a bridesmaid is planning, hosting, and attending pre-wedding parties, such as the engagement party, bridal shower, and bachelorette party. These events can be expensive, especially if the bachelorette party is in a different location. A bridesmaid can spend over $800 on hosting responsibilities, travel, and gifts for these events, with the bachelorette party being the most expensive.

On top of all these costs, a bridesmaid is also expected to buy a wedding gift for the couple. On average, a bridesmaid spends $125 on a wedding gift, usually something from the couple's registry.

The cost of being a bridesmaid also varies depending on the region. For example, in the US, the most expensive place to be a bridesmaid is the West and Southwest, where bridesmaids can expect to pay $1,360 per wedding. The least expensive region is the Midwest, where the cost is $1,100.

They can help with planning

Bridesmaids can be a great help when it comes to planning a wedding. They can be involved in the planning process and take on some of the organisational burdens, leaving the bride and groom with less to worry about.

For example, bridesmaids can help with the logistics of the day, such as running errands, checking on the setup of the ceremony and reception sites, and acting as a point of contact for the couple. They can also be a source of emotional support, ensuring the bride stays on schedule, eats and stays hydrated, and providing a calming presence on the day.

Bridesmaids also traditionally plan the bridal shower and bachelorette party, taking the pressure off the couple to organise these events themselves. They can also be involved in wedding dress shopping, providing an opinion and making the experience more enjoyable for the bride.

Additionally, bridesmaids can be a source of financial support, as they often cover some of the costs associated with being a bridesmaid, such as their attire, hair, makeup, and flowers. This can help reduce the financial burden on the couple, allowing them to allocate more funds to other aspects of the wedding, such as the venue, décor, or honeymoon.

Finally, having bridesmaids can free up the couple's schedule, as they won't need to spend as much time coordinating with a large group of people and can focus on their own preparations and tasks.

They can provide emotional support

Bridesmaids can provide a lot of emotional support, which is undoubtedly one of the biggest benefits of having them. On your wedding day, having a crew of your closest friends and family members nearby can help you feel more comfortable and at ease. They can be there for you in the early morning, throughout the getting-ready process, just before you walk down the aisle, standing next to you when you say your "I dos", and at nearby tables during your reception.

Bridesmaids can also help with pre-wedding tasks and logistics. They can plan the shower and bachelorette party, as well as help with smaller day-of duties and wedding emergencies. They can also help you remember to eat something substantial and drink enough water.

Additionally, bridesmaids can provide support with your attire. They can go dress shopping with you and give you advice on which wedding dress silhouette and style to choose. They can also get ready with you on the morning of the wedding, enjoying mimosas and tunes while getting their hair and makeup done.

Finally, bridesmaids can offer emotional support by simply being there for you on your big day. They can stand by your side as you make your way down the aisle, providing a sense of comfort and camaraderie. This can be especially helpful if you are feeling nervous or overwhelmed.

Overall, bridesmaids can play a crucial role in providing emotional support to the bride, ensuring that she feels loved, supported, and at ease on one of the most important days of her life.

They can be chosen to honour close friends

Bridesmaids are often chosen to honour close friends, and while it is becoming more common for brides to skip the bridal party altogether, there are ways to include your nearest and dearest without giving them an official role.

Firstly, you could ask a close friend to perform a reading during the ceremony. This could be a poem or a passage from a novel or song lyrics. You could even ask a friend to be the officiant. This will make your ceremony more personal, and your friend will feel honoured to be included.

Secondly, you can still get ready together. Invite your closest friends to join you in the bridal suite while you get your hair and makeup done. You could even offer to pay for them to be pampered too, and don't forget the champagne!

Thirdly, take a special photo. Although you won't have the formal bridal party photos, you can still arrange to have some special set photographs taken beyond family groupings. Be sure to send them a copy of the picture after the wedding with a personal note.

Finally, you can invite your friends to a special dinner or day out. Although they won't be part of the official bridal party, you can still include your closest friends in the rehearsal dinner or a wedding morning brunch.

There are many ways to honour your closest friends on your wedding day, even if you decide not to have bridesmaids.

They can be included in pre-wedding parties

Bridesmaids can be included in a variety of pre-wedding parties. Here are some ideas for including them in these celebrations:

Engagement Party

Although engagement parties are usually hosted by the couple's parents or close friends, bridesmaids can be involved in the planning process. They can also be included in the guest list, especially if the party is hosted by the bride's family or friends. This is a great opportunity for the bridesmaids to meet and mingle with the couple's family and friends.

Bridal Shower or Wedding Shower

The bridal shower is a traditional pre-wedding party hosted by the bride's family or the bridal party. It is typically a female-only event with the bride's family and friends, including the bridesmaids. During the bridal shower, the bridesmaids can participate in various activities such as games, gift-giving, and sharing stories or well-wishes for the bride. They can also help with the planning and hosting of the event, creating a memorable celebration for the bride.

Bachelorette Party

The bachelorette party is a special celebration for the bride-to-be and her bridesmaids. It is typically planned by the maid of honor, with input from the bridesmaids. This party is an opportunity for the bridesmaids to bond with the bride and enjoy a fun night or weekend getaway. The bridesmaids can suggest activities or locations that the bride might enjoy, ensuring that her wishes are met.

Bridesmaid Luncheon

The bridesmaid luncheon is an intimate gathering hosted by the bride to thank her bridesmaids for their support and assistance during the wedding planning process. It is usually held the day before the wedding or earlier if all the bridesmaids live close by. The bride can use this opportunity to present gifts to her bridesmaids and create special memories with them before the big day.

Rehearsal Dinner

The rehearsal dinner is typically held the night before the wedding, after the wedding rehearsal. While it is commonly hosted by the groom's family, the couple or their parents may also host this event. The bridesmaids are usually invited to the rehearsal dinner, and it serves as a chance for them to relax and socialize with the couple and their families. It is also an opportunity for the couple to express their appreciation for the support of their bridal party.

Frequently asked questions