Lyla Dejesus
Wedding vows are promises made by each partner during a wedding ceremony. They are steeped in love and are often the most moving and personal aspect of the nuptials. While traditional vows are adapted from the Book of Common Prayer, couples may choose to write their own, speaking from the heart with words of romance, humour, and lightheartedness. These vows are a look into the couple's love story, what they hold dear, and what they will value in their marriage.
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What You'll Learn
Love and devotion
The Meaning of Love and Devotion
The concept of love and devotion in wedding vows goes beyond just romantic love. It encompasses a deep sense of respect, admiration, and dedication to one's partner. It is a promise to choose each other every day, to be there through thick and thin, and to put the relationship first.
Expressing Love and Devotion in Vows
When writing wedding vows, couples often express their love and devotion through heartfelt words and promises. Some choose to speak of their unique love story, recalling how they fell in love and the impact their partner has had on their life. For example:
> "I thought I knew everything before I met you, then I met you and I realized I didn't know anything—not until we fell in love."
Others may focus on the qualities they admire in their partner and how they make them a better person:
> "I admire you and look up to you for all the good you bring to this great big world. Your thoughtfulness touches everyone's life you are a part of. I am the richest person to have you by my side."
Traditional Vows of Love and Devotion
Traditional wedding vows, such as those from the Book of Common Prayer, also reflect love and devotion in their own way. Phrases like "to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health," speak of a commitment to stand by each other through life's challenges and triumphs.
Soulmate Connections
Some couples choose to emphasise the soulmate aspect of their relationship in their vows, expressing their unwavering love and devotion:
> "I promise that our love is that of soulmates—the blurring of self and the deep entanglement with another. I vow to stay your soulmate, to see and hear you every day."
Devotion in Action
Ultimately, love and devotion are not just words; they are shown through actions and repeated little acts of devotion. As one vow puts it:
> "I could stand here and tell you how much I love you, but those words mean nothing unless they are shown through repeated little acts of devotion, so I promise to show you I love you every day."
In conclusion, love and devotion are integral aspects of wedding vows, and couples can tailor their promises to reflect their unique relationship, experiences, and hopes for the future.
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Cherishing your partner
"I promise to always pursue you, fight for you, and love you unconditionally and wholeheartedly for the rest of my life. I will show you my love every day through repeated little acts of devotion." It is these small, everyday gestures that often show your partner how much you cherish them.
"I promise to love, respect, protect and trust you, and give you the best of myself. I vow to keep our relationship a safe haven of love, support and peace, even and especially during hard times." Marriage is not always easy, and pledging to cherish your partner through life's challenges is a meaningful commitment.
"I promise to continually recognize our soulmate connection and that what we have doesn't come along all the time. You are my person, my inspiration, my love, and my everything. I cannot wait to spend a lifetime loving you." Acknowledging the deep and unique bond you share with your partner is a beautiful way to express your devotion.
"I vow to express my love for you as often as I breathe each breath. I will always tell you how much I love and appreciate you." Sometimes, simply expressing your love and gratitude is a powerful way to cherish your partner.
"I promise to carry you and to be carried by you, to journey with you and to love each minute because of our travels together. We will live a life of constant adventure together." In this vow, you are pledging to be your partner's rock, to share life's joys and burdens equally, and to embrace the adventures that lie ahead.
Remember, these are just examples to inspire your own unique vows. Feel free to adapt and personalise them to reflect your relationship and the special bond you share with your partner.
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Promises and commitments
Wedding vows are promises made by each partner to the other during a wedding ceremony. They are steeped in love and are a look into the couple's love story, what they hold dear, and what they will value in their marriage.
I promise to keep finding new ways to love you. I promise my love for you will remain fierce, blazing, and passionate. I promise to always pursue you, to fight for you, and to love you unconditionally and wholeheartedly for the rest of my life. I promise to always tell you how much I love you and appreciate all that you do. I promise to love, respect, protect, and trust you, and give you the best of myself. I vow to keep our relationship a safe haven of love, support, and peace—even and especially during hard times. I promise to continually recognize our soulmate connection and that what we have doesn't come along all the time. I vow to remember that you are my soulmate—that we were brought together by fate, but we stay together with unwavering love and commitment. I promise to need you—to say goodnight, to kiss me on the eyelids, to have and to adore even when you feel down. I vow to carry you and to be carried by you, to journey with you, and to love each minute because of our travels together. I vow to express my love for you as often as I breathe each breath. I promise to love you in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad. I promise to help you raise our children and to be a devoted family person. I promise to support you and stick by your side through thick and thin. I promise to be true to you and honour you all the days of my life.
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Religious references
Religious wedding vows are steeped in history, culture, and meaning. They are declarations of lifelong commitment to each other, made in the presence of God and loved ones. While some religious vows are set in stone, others allow for customisation and additions such as religious readings, poetry, or extracts.
In the United States, Catholic wedding vows may take the following form:
> I, [name], take you, [name], to be my lawfully wedded [husband/wife], to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
In the UK, religious vows derive from the Book of Common Prayer, published in 1549, based on the Sarum Rite of Medieval England:
> I, [name], take you, [name], to be my [husband/wife]. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health.
The oldest traditional wedding vows can be traced back to the manuals of the medieval church. In England, the dioceses of Salisbury (Sarum) and York had manuals. Couples could promise each other to "love and cherish" or, alternatively, the groom could promise to "love, cherish, and worship", and the bride to "love, cherish, and obey".
Presbyterian
> I, [name], take you, [name], to be my wedded [wife/husband], and I do promise and covenant, before God and these witnesses, to be your loving and faithful [husband/wife], in plenty and want, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live.
Episcopal
> I, [name], take you, [name], to be my wedded [wife/husband], to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy law, and this is my solemn vow.
Quaker
Quaker weddings are unique in that they are self-uniting, with no officiant present, focusing on simplicity.
Jewish
> Harey at mekuddeshet li B'taba'at zo k'dat Moshe V'israel — Behold, thou art consecrated unto me with this ring according to the law of Moses and of Israel.
Greek and Eastern Orthodox
These ceremonies traditionally do not feature wedding vows. The wedding is viewed as the couple's joining through the eyes of God, so formal vows are not included.
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Soulmates
I promise to always make sure I bring a snack for you on long car trips. I vow to never stop kissing you every time we stop at a red light. I promise to remember we are not perfect—only perfect for each other. I vow to learn how to use the espresso machine so I can make you your morning coffee just how you like it. I promise to laugh with you every day, to dance with you in the kitchen, and to celebrate the highest of highs.
I promise to always be there for you in good times and bad, to encourage you and believe in you, to comfort and support you. Together we have weathered the storms, and our bond has strengthened. I will be your anchor in the storm and your light in the dark. I will remind you to be healthy so that we can spend decades together. I promise to hold your hand through thick and thin, and together, we will always win.
I promise to love you without hesitation, to be your biggest supporter, your trusted partner, and the one you turn to for comfort and joy. I vow to be your navigator, your best friend, and your wife/husband. I promise to love and honour you all the days of my life.
You can also include personal touches and inside jokes in your vows to make them more genuine and heartfelt. You can also draw inspiration from quotes or famous wedding vows from popular TV shows.
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Frequently asked questions
Wedding vows are promises each partner in a couple makes to the other during a wedding ceremony.
Wedding vows are not necessary in most legal jurisdictions.
One example of a traditional wedding vow is: "I, [name], take you, [name], to be my [wife/husband], to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part."
Yes, civil ceremonies often allow couples to choose their own marriage vows. You can write your own vows or adapt them from traditional ones.
Your wedding vows should come from the heart and reflect your love story, what you hold dear, and what you will value in your marriage. You can include humour, romantic movie quotes, or speak to the future of your family unit.
