Planning a wedding can be a stressful and time-consuming process. One of the first steps is to set a date for the wedding, which will usually involve checking the availability of your desired venue(s) and vendors. Some couples choose a date that is meaningful to them, while others opt for a more flexible approach, selecting a venue first and then choosing a date based on its availability. It's recommended to give yourself at least a year to plan your wedding, as finding and ordering a wedding dress can take 9 to 11 months, and many venues are booked over a year in advance. When deciding on a date, it's important to consider factors such as the desired season, budget, guest availability, and any potential schedule conflicts with other events or weddings.
What You'll Learn
Choosing a venue first
Advantages of Choosing a Venue First
- More venue options: Venues often get booked up 12 to 18 months in advance, so if you have a specific venue in mind, it's best to secure it early.
- Flexibility with dates: By choosing a venue first, you can be flexible with your wedding date and select the one that works best for you and your partner.
- Avoid limitations: Selecting a date first may limit your venue options, especially if you have a specific date in mind and are not willing to compromise.
- Dream venue: If you have your heart set on a particular venue, choosing it first ensures you can then plan the rest of your wedding around its availability.
Factors to Consider When Choosing a Venue
- Style and theme: The venue sets the tone for your wedding. Consider whether you want a classic, bohemian, or rustic venue, and whether it aligns with your desired theme.
- Package types: Evaluate what the venue package includes, such as space, food, and drinks. This will impact your overall budget and the need for external vendors.
- Capacity: Ensure the venue's capacity aligns with your guest list. You don't want a venue that's too small or too large for your expected number of guests.
- Budget: The venue typically accounts for 10% to 15% of the total wedding budget, but this can increase if the venue includes additional services.
- Accessibility: Consider the venue's location and accessibility for your guests, especially if you have guests travelling from out of town.
- Date availability: While choosing a venue first gives you more flexibility with dates, you still need to ensure the venue has availability on or close to your desired date.
Tips for Selecting a Venue
- Start early: Begin your venue search at least a year in advance to increase your chances of securing your preferred option.
- Season and weather: Consider the season and typical weather conditions when choosing a venue, especially if you want an outdoor wedding.
- Peak vs. off-peak dates: Opting for an off-peak date can save you money and provide more venue options.
- Local events: Check for any major local events, such as festivals or sporting events, that may clash with your wedding date.
- Venue availability: Inquire about the venue's availability for your desired date range and be open to considering weekdays or off-season dates to increase your chances of booking your dream venue.
Remember, choosing a venue first gives you the advantage of flexibility and ensures you don't miss out on your dream venue due to date limitations.
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Picking a date with symbolic meaning
Special Dates in Your Relationship
You could choose to get married on the anniversary of a special moment in your relationship, such as your first date, the day you became a couple, or the anniversary of your first kiss. This is a wonderful way to celebrate your love story and bring everything full circle.
Numerology
If you believe in the power of numbers, you can select a date based on numerology. For instance, in Chinese culture, the number eight is considered lucky as it sounds similar to the word "wealth." So, dates with the number eight in them could be considered auspicious. You can also add two numbers that are meaningful to you to create a wedding date. For example, if you like the numbers two and nine, you could choose the 29th as your wedding date.
Astrology
Astrology can be a fun way to choose a wedding date. You can consult with an astrologer or use your birth chart to determine the most beneficial transits and movements for your big day. Pay close attention to the moon, Venus, Jupiter, and Saturn when selecting a date. A full moon, for instance, is considered a great time for a wedding as it illuminates matters on Earth and is thought to be prosperous. Similarly, a new moon symbolizes a new life together and can help manifest the couple's deepest dreams.
Lucky Days and Months
Different cultures have traditional lucky days for weddings. For example, in Irish culture, New Year's Eve is considered the luckiest wedding date. You can also consider the time of year and choose a season that aligns with your desired wedding style and location. For instance, if you want a fun, tropical-themed wedding, summer might be the perfect season.
Family Traditions and Customs
If you have a specific cultural or family tradition, you can incorporate that into your wedding date. For example, in Chinese culture, it is considered auspicious to choose a wedding date that gives priority to the birthday of the bride.
Remember, when picking a symbolic date, it's essential to ensure that your chosen venue is available and that the date works for your closest guests. You can always share the significance of your chosen date with your guests on your wedding website, save-the-dates, or invitations.
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Selecting an outdoor venue
Consider the Location
Think about the type of outdoor setting you want for your wedding. Do you prefer a beach, mountain, desert, or city location? Each option will offer a different atmosphere and experience for you and your guests. For example, a beach wedding can be mellow and relaxing, while a mountain wedding can be adventurous and exhilarating.
Research Venues
Once you have an idea of your preferred location, start researching specific venues. Look for venues that offer the amenities and services you need, such as indoor spaces in case of inclement weather, catering options, and accommodation for your guests. Read reviews, check out photos, and consider visiting the venues in person to get a better sense of the space.
Weather Considerations
When selecting an outdoor venue, it's essential to consider the potential impact of the weather. Opt for locations with mild climates during your desired season to reduce the risk of extreme temperatures or harsh conditions. If you're set on a particular venue, be prepared to have a backup plan, such as a tent or indoor space, in case of unexpected weather changes.
Permits and Restrictions
Outdoor venues often come with additional considerations, such as permits and restrictions. Research whether you need a permit for your desired location, especially if you have a large guest list or want to reserve a specific area. Inquire about noise ordinances, restrictions on amplified sound, and size limits for tents or canopies. These factors will influence the overall experience and layout of your wedding.
Décor and Rentals
Outdoor venues typically require additional rentals, such as tables, chairs, linens, and a sound system. Consider the décor style you want to achieve and how it can complement the natural setting. Simple, elegant décor can enhance the beauty of the outdoors without overwhelming the space.
Catering and Food Options
When it comes to catering for an outdoor wedding, opt for caterers with experience in outdoor events. They will be able to guide you on food options that are suitable for the weather conditions and provide recommendations for catering rental needs. Consider unique food options like a wood-fired pizza oven or a pig roast to create a memorable dining experience for your guests.
Guest Experience
Finally, always prioritize the guest experience. Inform your guests about the outdoor setting in your invitations or wedding website, so they can dress appropriately and make any necessary preparations. Consider providing items like heel stoppers or parasols to make your guests more comfortable during the event.
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Picking a date to avoid family conflicts
Picking a date for your wedding can be a tricky task, especially when it comes to avoiding family conflicts. Here are some tips to help you choose the perfect date while minimising potential issues with family members:
- Be mindful of other weddings: Avoid planning your wedding on the same day as a friend or family member. If you become aware of a conflict after booking your date, it is courteous to give up that day and choose another. If you have many guests attending both events, consider selecting a date a few months before or after the other wedding.
- Consider religious holidays: If a significant number of guests or important attendees, such as bridal party members, observe a religious holiday that you and your partner do not, think about choosing an alternative date. Be respectful of their beliefs and traditions, and they will likely show their support for you on your special day.
- Navigate family milestones: If someone important to you is expecting a baby or has a close family member or friend graduating around your desired wedding date, try to find an alternative time. You don't want to compete with other major life events, and you'll want to be able to support your loved ones without the added pressure of an upcoming wedding.
- Be mindful of birthdays: While it's unlikely that your wedding will fall on a guest's birthday, it's worth avoiding milestone birthdays or important attendees who have already made significant plans for that date.
- Avoid major sporting events: Unless you and your partner are die-hard sports fans, try to steer clear of dates that coincide with major sporting events. While most games don't occur on Fridays or Saturdays, you don't want to clash with pre-parties or ruin your guests' plans.
- Check the weather: If you're planning an outdoor ceremony, be mindful of unpredictable weather seasons. Consider the option of an indoor reception or a tented area outside if there's a chance of rain.
- Communicate with your inner circle: Ask the preferences of your VIP guest list, including your parents, siblings, and honour attendants. Be cautious of expanding this group too much, as it can become challenging to accommodate everyone's preferences. Once the date is set, stick to it and don't budge.
- Be considerate of family dynamics: If you have a large extended family, consider the potential impact of your chosen date on their attendance. For example, if you have family members who are teachers, avoid dates close to the end or beginning of the school year. Similarly, if you have family members with seasonal jobs, choose a date when they are more likely to be available.
Remember, the date you choose is significant to you and your partner, and your guests should respect that. However, being mindful of potential family conflicts can help ensure a smooth planning process and a memorable day for all the right reasons!
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Choosing a date for good weather
When it comes to choosing a wedding date, there are many factors to consider. While some couples opt for a date that holds symbolic value, such as an anniversary or a culturally significant date, others may prioritise finding their dream venue first and then picking a date based on the venue's availability.
If you're looking to have an outdoor wedding, choosing a date with good weather will be a key consideration. Here are some tips to help you select the perfect date for your big day:
Pick Your Desired Wedding Season
Start by considering the climate of your wedding location. If you want an outdoor wedding, choose a season with mild weather and clear skies. Spring and summer are popular choices for outdoor weddings, as they offer warmer temperatures and a lower chance of rain. However, keep in mind that peak wedding season typically falls between May and October, resulting in higher prices and increased competition for venues and vendors.
Consider Off-Peak Dates
If you're looking to save on your wedding expenses, consider choosing an off-peak date. While winter is generally considered the low season for weddings, the months of December and February tend to be busier and more expensive due to holidays. Instead, January, March, April, and November can offer discounted prices and a better selection of venues and vendors.
Check the Calendar for Local Events
Be mindful of local events and customs when selecting your wedding date. Major sporting events, graduations, festivals, and other large gatherings can result in sold-out hotels, high airfares, and heavy traffic. You don't want your wedding weekend to coincide with events that may cause inconvenience for your guests.
Be Mindful of Holiday Weekends
Holiday weekends can be a convenient choice for weddings, especially if you have guests travelling from out of town. However, keep in mind that some guests may have their own travel plans for these long weekends, so choose a date that balances convenience with the likelihood of guest attendance.
Consider Lucky Wedding Dates
If you're superstitious or want to honour your cultural background, choosing a lucky date for your wedding may be important. For example, Jewish tradition considers Tuesdays lucky for weddings, while in Irish culture, New Year's Eve is considered the luckiest wedding date.
Ask Your VIP Guest List
While it's impossible to choose a date that works for everyone, consider asking your closest loved ones about any date conflicts. This input can help you avoid scheduling your wedding on a date when key family members or friends may be unavailable.
Remember, the process of choosing a wedding date is unique to each couple. By considering the above factors and staying flexible, you'll be well on your way to selecting the perfect date for your dream wedding.
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Frequently asked questions
A decision date wedding is when you set a cut-off date to make all the decisions for your wedding by.
A decision date can help reduce stress and give you a clear timeline to work with. It can also help you stay focused and organised.
The average engagement length in the US is 12 to 18 months. It's recommended to give yourself at least a year to plan your wedding.
Consider the season, your budget, the availability of your venue and vendors, and any symbolic dates or holidays.
The peak season for weddings is typically between May and October, with October being the most popular month in recent history.