The Best Man's Guide To Wedding Day Duties

what is a best man expected to do

Being chosen as a best man is an honour and a privilege, but it also comes with a lot of responsibilities. The best man is the groom's right-hand man, confidant, and personal valet, and is expected to support the groom throughout the wedding planning process and on the big day itself. From helping to plan the bachelor party to giving a memorable speech, the best man has a lot of duties to fulfil. So, what exactly is a best man expected to do?

Characteristics Values
Support Provide moral support, be a confidant, provide emotional support
Planning Plan the bachelor party, coordinate travel and accommodations, coordinate formalwear, coordinate transportation, coordinate pre-wedding events, help select the engagement ring, help select the wedding ring
Organisational Lead the groomsmen, coordinate with vendors, coordinate reception activities, be the point of contact, be the time enforcer, collect gifts, help with clean-up
Financial Pay for travel and accommodations, pay for pre-wedding grooming, buy a wedding gift
Ceremonial Stand next to the groom during the ceremony, hold the wedding rings, sign the marriage license, give a speech, decorate the getaway car

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Organise the bachelor party

Organising the bachelor party is one of the best man's most important duties. It's a role that requires a lot of planning and coordination, but it's also a chance to celebrate the groom's last days as a single man. Here are some tips to help you organise an unforgettable bachelor party:

Start Planning Early:

Begin planning the bachelor party several months in advance. Set a date, create a budget, and start thinking about potential venues and activities. The earlier you start, the more time you'll have to create a fun and memorable event.

Understand the Groom's Preferences:

The bachelor party should be tailored to the groom's interests and personality. Consider his favourite foods, drinks, activities, and how he likes to spend time with his friends. For example, a day of golf followed by drinks, a night of clubbing, or a low-key evening of video games and movies at home.

Enlist the Groomsmen:

Don't be afraid to ask for help! The other groomsmen can provide valuable support and ideas. They can also help with logistics and recommendations. It's a team effort, so make sure to delegate tasks and get everyone involved.

Manage the Guest List and Budget:

Discuss the guest list with the groom and create a budget that works for everyone. The cost of the bachelor party is typically split evenly among the attendees, excluding the groom. Make sure to send out invitations in advance and keep track of RSVPs.

Choose a Venue and Activities:

Select a venue that aligns with the groom's interests and the budget. It could be a local bar or distillery, a golf course, or even a trip to a fun destination. Plan a variety of activities that the groom and the guests will enjoy. This could include games, sports, sightseeing, or simply enjoying good food and drinks.

Pay Attention to Details:

Think about transportation, accommodation, and any special requests or requirements from the guests. Create a timeline for the event and share it with the groomsmen and guests. Make sure everyone is on the same page to ensure a smooth and enjoyable experience.

Remember, the key to a successful bachelor party is to focus on the groom's happiness and create an event that celebrates his unique personality. It's an honour to be chosen as the best man, so embrace the challenge and have fun with the planning process!

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Be the groom's confidant and right-hand man

Being the groom's confidant and right-hand man is a key part of being the best man. The groom will likely be feeling the pressure of the big day, so it's the best man's job to be there for him as a supportive friend. This can include helping the groom with ring selection, providing unending emotional support, and assisting with any last-minute pre-wedding jitters.

The best man is also the leader of the groomsmen, so it's his job to introduce everyone and keep the groomsmen on track with their duties. This includes coordinating the groomsmen's attire, making sure they are where they need to be, and on time, and keeping the wedding rings safe until the ceremony.

The best man is also responsible for organizing the bachelor party. This involves planning the activities, picking a venue, and ensuring the groom has a memorable time.

On the day of the wedding, the best man should be a relaxed and upbeat presence for the groom. This might include playing music, having a few beers, and playing cards or video games to help pass the time and keep the groom's nerves at bay.

Throughout the wedding planning process and on the big day itself, the best man is there to support the groom and ensure his wishes are fulfilled.

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Give a best man speech

So, your friend has chosen you to be his best man. It's a big honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. One of your most important duties is to give a best man's speech. Here's a step-by-step guide to help you prepare and deliver a memorable speech.

Before the Speech

First things first, don't leave writing your speech until the last minute. Start preparing early, and give yourself plenty of time to practise. Your speech should be heartfelt and sincere, but it should also be entertaining and engaging for your audience. Include some lighthearted anecdotes about the groom, but avoid anything that might cause drama or embarrassment. Remember, it's a celebration, so keep things positive.

During the Speech

As the best man, you'll typically give your speech during the reception, after the father of the bride and/or groom, and the maid of honour. Your speech should be relatively short—you don't want to ramble on and bore the guests. Begin by introducing yourself and thanking the guests for coming. You can also thank the bride's parents for hosting, if appropriate. Then move on to talking about the groom. Share some stories that show his good qualities and why he's a great friend. You can also talk about how he and the bride met, and what makes them a great couple. Raise a toast to the happy couple, and wish them a happy future together.

After the Speech

Once your speech is over, you can relax and enjoy the rest of the reception. But remember, your duties as best man don't end there. You'll need to stay sober enough to help with any issues that might arise, and keep the party going by leading the dancing and making sure everyone is having a good time. You might also be expected to help with tasks like collecting gifts, decorating the getaway car, and tipping the vendors.

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Keep the wedding rings safe

Keeping the wedding rings safe is one of the most important duties of the best man. Here are some tips to ensure that the rings are secure:

Before the Wedding

It is a good idea to familiarise yourself with the rings in the weeks leading up to the wedding. Find out where the couple bought them and if they have had any alterations made. This will help you to recognise them easily and know who to contact in an emergency.

The week before the wedding, collect the rings and keep them in a safe place. You could put them in a locked drawer or a safe, or carry them with you at all times. Make sure that your pockets don't have any holes!

On the Wedding Day

Keep the rings with you at all times. If you are also giving a speech, be sure to check that your pockets are secure before you stand up. If the ring bearer is carrying the rings on a pillow, you will need to fasten them to the pillow as you line up for the processional and collect them again at the end of the aisle.

If you are not the ring bearer, make sure that the ring bearer knows when and where to hand over the rings. You should also check that they are comfortable with their role and won't be too nervous to carry out the task.

During the Ceremony

When the time comes for the couple to exchange rings, be ready to hand them over. You don't want to be fumbling around in your pockets at this important moment!

After the Ceremony

Once the rings have been exchanged, your main duty is complete. You can hand them over to the newlyweds or ask if they would like you to keep them safe for the rest of the day.

In an Emergency

If you lose the rings, don't panic. Retrace your steps and check the places you have been recently. If you can't find them, tell the couple as soon as possible. Backup rings or symbolic stand-ins can be used for the ceremony, and the originals may still turn up later.

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Act as a witness and sign the marriage certificate

Acting as a witness and signing the marriage certificate is one of the most important duties of a best man. The marriage license is a crucial document, and without it, the couple is not legally married. Therefore, the best man must be present when the couple signs the license, which usually happens after the wedding ceremony, but sometimes before. The best man and the maid of honor typically act as the two witnesses required to sign the marriage license. Once the couple has signed the license, the best man will sign it as a witness and then hand the officiant a sealed envelope containing their fee. The officiant will then send the marriage license to the county clerk's office, and the couple will receive their official marriage certificate.

In addition to signing the marriage license, the best man may also be responsible for other tasks related to the marriage certificate. In some cases, the best man may be asked to deliver the marriage certificate to the couple after the wedding. This is an important responsibility, as the couple will need the marriage certificate to legally change their names, apply for a mortgage, or file joint tax returns. Therefore, the best man should ensure that the marriage certificate is delivered to the couple safely and securely.

Furthermore, the best man may also be asked to help with other administrative tasks related to the wedding. For example, he may be tasked with collecting and organizing wedding gifts, depositing checks from guests into the couple's bank account, or ensuring that vendors are tipped and paid at the end of the reception. The best man may also be in charge of transporting gifts to the couple's home or another safe location after the wedding.

Overall, the role of the best man as a witness and signatory to the marriage certificate is a critical aspect of the wedding process. By fulfilling this duty, the best man helps ensure that the couple's marriage is legally recognized and that they have the necessary documentation for their future life together.

Frequently asked questions

A best man is the groom's right-hand man and confidant, providing moral support and guidance throughout the wedding planning process and on the big day itself. He is also in charge of the groomsmen, leading all communication and coordinating their activities and duties.

A best man has several duties, including but not limited to: leading the groomsmen, planning the bachelor party, coordinating formalwear, acting as the groom's personal valet on the wedding day, keeping the wedding rings safe, signing the marriage license, giving a best man speech, and helping with post-wedding tasks such as collecting gifts and tipping vendors.

During the wedding ceremony, the best man traditionally walks down the aisle after the groom and stands next to him at the altar, offering support and ensuring everything runs smoothly. He also presents the wedding rings during the exchange of vows.

At the wedding reception, the best man is expected to give a speech honouring the groom and imparting their shared history. He may also act as an unofficial host, ensuring guests are having a good time and that the wedding party knows where to be and when.

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