Deborah Chan
Christian wedding vows are a declaration of lifelong commitment to each other in the presence of loved ones and God. The vows are an important aspect of a Christian wedding as they lay the spiritual foundation for a lifelong journey. While there are no specific wedding vows in the Bible, Christian wedding vows are based on the basic principles of love, devotion, and care that come from scripture. These vows are often inspired by scriptures that speak to the importance of marriage and the roles of a husband and wife in a marriage. Couples can choose to use traditional Christian wedding vows, which are often derived from the Book of Common Prayer, or write their own vows to reflect their unique relationship and beliefs.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Spiritual foundation | To have and to hold |
| Expression of commitment and faith | For better, for worse |
| Lifelong journey | For richer, for poorer |
| Honour family tradition | In sickness and in health |
| Speak from the heart | To love and to cherish |
| Tell your partner what you love about them | Till death do us part |
| How you'll treat your partner | According to God's holy law |
| What your faith and marriage mean to you | To be honest, compassionate and loyal |
| To share laughter and tears |
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What You'll Learn
Christian wedding vows are a declaration of lifelong commitment
The traditional Christian wedding vows, which have been popular for almost 500 years, are based on a Protestant prayer book published in 1552, known as The Book of Common Prayer. These vows, originally written in Old English, have evolved over time, and today, they are often adapted to reflect the unique relationship and beliefs of the couple.
A typical example of Christian wedding vows includes phrases such as:
> "I, [name], take you, [name], to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy law."
These vows emphasise the couple's commitment to each other through life's joys and challenges, and they are made "in the presence of God" or in the name of God.
Some couples may choose to add their own personal touches, religious readings, poetry, or extracts from the Bible to their vows. For instance, a husband may say:
> " [Bride's name], we read in Genesis, 'Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife,' and in Proverbs, 'Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing.' He has ordained that the husband be the head of the wife. He instructs me, as the one who will be your husband, to love you as Christ loves the Church. It is my desire and delight to follow this scriptural teaching. With all my heart, I make this pledge to you."
Similarly, a wife may say:
> " [Groom's name], the Lord instructs me as the one who will be your wife to submit to you as unto Him. Our Father created woman to be man's helper."
Ultimately, Christian wedding vows are a profound expression of commitment and faith, and they serve as a guide for couples as they embark on their married life together, centred on God's love and principles.
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Vows can be modified or written by the couple
Wedding vows are a declaration of lifelong commitment to each other in the presence of loved ones. In Christian weddings, these vows are also a profound expression of faith.
While there are no specific wedding vows in the Bible, couples can certainly find inspiration from scriptures that speak to the importance of marriage. For instance, Bible.org provides potential biblical marriage vows that are different for the husband and wife but carry powerful meaning. The husband's vows are based on Genesis and Proverbs, and the wife's vows are based on her submitting to her husband "as unto Him", as instructed by the Lord.
Many couples may prefer to stick to traditional Christian wedding vows, which have stood the test of time and can be an eloquent way to describe commitment to one another. These vows are also a great way to honour family tradition and to speak the same words as those who came before you. The traditional vows are:
> "I, [name], take you, [name], to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy law."
However, these vows are not set in stone, and couples can modify or create their own vows to reflect their unique relationship and beliefs. For example, couples can add in religious readings, poetry or extracts from the Bible. It is important to discuss any changes with your clergy member, as some may be stricter than others.
Couples may also choose to write their own vows, ensuring that they accurately express their feelings and commitment to each other. When writing your own vows, it is a good idea to keep them concise, focusing on 3-5 sentences that convey the essential promises. These can be more personal, telling your partner what you love about them, how you'll treat them, and what your faith and marriage mean to you.
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Vows can include religious readings, poetry or extracts
Christian wedding vows are sacred promises exchanged by a couple, expressing their commitment, love, and faith in their marriage journey. They are not just words but a covenant before God, reflecting biblical principles of love, devotion, and unity.
There is no specific template for Christian wedding vows, and couples can personalise them according to their beliefs and personalities. However, they should be based on Christian principles and can include religious readings, poetry, or extracts. For example, couples can use scripture to strengthen their vows, such as 1 Corinthians 13:4-7: "Love is patient, love is kind...".
Couples can also include their own readings, poetry, or extracts from books to express their feelings and commitment in a personal way. These additions can be used to complement the official vows, which are legally binding and cannot be changed.
> "______, I love you. I prayed that God would lead me to his choice, and I praise Him that tonight His will is being fulfilled. Through the pressures of the present and uncertainties of the future, I promise my faithfulness. I promise to follow you through all of life’s experiences as you follow God, that together we may grow in the likeness of Christ and our home be a praise to Him."
Ultimately, Christian wedding vows should reflect the unique relationship and beliefs of the couple, while adhering to the fundamental principles of their faith.
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Vows are exchanged before an authorised person
Wedding vows are a declaration of lifelong commitment to one another in the presence of loved ones. In most countries, you must exchange vows for a marriage to be legal. In Christian weddings, the vows are exchanged before an authorised person, such as a member of the clergy or a registrar. The religious vows used in Christian weddings in the UK were first written in the Book of Common Prayer in 1549, but they were around much earlier in the Sarum Rite in Medieval England.
The authorised person who presides over the wedding ceremony can help the couple structure their wedding ceremony, including the vows, to be exactly how they would like, with religious references if desired. The couple can choose to use traditional vows, write their own, or mix and match elements of different vows.
Traditional Christian wedding vows often include phrases such as:
> I, [name], take you, [name], to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God’s holy law.
These traditional vows can be modified to reflect the couple's unique relationship and beliefs. For example, some couples may choose to add in religious readings, poetry, or extracts from the Bible.
In addition to exchanging vows, the couple will also make 'Declarations' that reference God and their commitment to each other.
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Vows can be inspired by scriptures
Christian wedding vows are not in the Bible, but they are based on biblical principles. Couples can personalise their vows to make them more meaningful and specific to their relationship.
Christian wedding vows typically include promises of love, faithfulness, and support, often framed as a covenant before God. They usually reference the sanctity of marriage, the intention to honour one another, and the commitment to persevere through life's challenges together.
Including scripture, such as 1 Corinthians 13 or Ephesians 5:25, is a beautiful way to ground your vows in faith. Be sure to consult your officiant if you’re including any unique elements to ensure they align with the church’s traditions.
> "I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my wedded [wife/husband], to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until death do us part. According to God’s holy ordinance, I pledge you my faithfulness."
> "I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."
> "I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my best friend and partner in life. With God as our guide, I promise to love and support you unconditionally, to celebrate your joys, and to be a source of strength in times of hardship."
> "I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my (wedded) husband/wife. And I do promise before God and these witnesses that I will be your faithful and loving wife/husband, as long as we both shall live. I will trust in the strength of our commitment. I will share myself with you, honour, challenge and respect you. I promise to be honest, compassionate and loyal. Together we will laugh, cry, grow and dream."
> "I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my (wedded) wife/husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as we both shall live. I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my wife/husband; and I promise, before God and these witnesses, to be your loving and faithful husband/wife; in plenty and in want; in joy and in sorrow; in sickness and in health; as long as we both shall live."
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Frequently asked questions
Christian wedding vows are a declaration of lifelong commitment to each other in the presence of God.
The most familiar Christian wedding vows are based on a Protestant prayer book published in 1552, called The Book of Common Prayer.
While there are no direct wedding vows in the Bible, there are Bible verses that can be used as inspiration for Christian wedding vows. For example, Genesis says, "Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife."
Yes, you can write your own Christian wedding vows. Many couples choose to do so to make their vows more personal and heartfelt.
Christian wedding vows should reflect your unique relationship and beliefs. They should also express your commitment and faith. You can include religious readings, poetry, or extracts to make your vows more meaningful.
