Wedding Invitation Rsvp: To Include Or Not?

Wedding planning is a stressful affair, and one of the most important aspects is the guest list. Couples often wonder whether it is okay to put RSVP on their wedding invitations. While there is no one-size-fits-all answer, there are some things to consider. Firstly, it is essential to understand the purpose of an RSVP, which is short for Répondez s'il vous plaît, meaning please respond in French. It is a way to prompt guests to respond to the invite, helping the couple organize the seating chart, menu, and music playlist.

Traditionally, wedding invitations are sent out six to eight weeks before the wedding, with a separate RSVP card included. This card allows guests to indicate their attendance, food preferences, and any special requests. However, in today's digital age, many couples opt for online RSVPs through their wedding website or email. This method is more cost-effective and environmentally friendly, but it is crucial to consider the comfort level of older guests who may not be tech-savvy.

Ultimately, the decision to include RSVP on the invitation or as a separate card depends on the couple's preference and the nature of their guest list. Some couples choose to provide both digital and paper RSVP options to accommodate their guests' needs.

RSVPing online vs. via mail

RSVPing online or via mail is a question many couples ask themselves when planning their wedding. Here are some pros and cons of each option to help you decide which method is best for you.

RSVPing Online

Online RSVPs can be a great, modern alternative to traditional mail-in responses. For one, they are often more convenient for both the couple and the guests. Guests can respond in just a few clicks, and couples can easily keep track of responses in real-time, without having to manually input each response. Online RSVPs are also more environmentally friendly, as they eliminate the need for extra paper and envelopes. Additionally, online RSVPs can help ensure that responses are not lost or damaged in the mail.

However, there are also some potential drawbacks to consider. Older guests may find online RSVPs confusing or difficult to navigate, and you may need to offer assistance or an alternative method for them. Websites can also be glitchy and unreliable, and you risk losing essential data if the site crashes. Finally, some people may prefer the more formal and traditional feel of a printed RSVP card.

RSVPing Via Mail

Mail-in RSVPs are the traditional method for responding to a wedding invitation and are often seen as more formal and elegant. They are also a good option for guests of all ages, as everyone knows how to fill out and send a card via mail. Receiving mail-in RSVPs can also be exciting for the couple, as it gives them something tangible to open and read each day.

On the other hand, mail-in RSVPs may be less convenient for guests, and there is a higher risk of responses getting lost or damaged in the mail. They can also be more expensive, as you need to factor in the cost of postage and stationery. Finally, mail-in RSVPs may not be the best option for couples who are moving or who have a large number of international guests, as it can take a long time for responses to arrive.

Ultimately, the decision of whether to choose online or mail-in RSVPs is a personal one and should be based on what works best for you and your guests.

Etiquette of including RSVP information on the wedding invitation

RSVP cards are a useful, though optional, addition to your wedding invitation suite. Many couples choose to include an RSVP card because they prompt guests to respond to the invite in a timely manner and thus help them organize the seating chart, menu, and even music playlist. If you choose not to provide a wedding RSVP card, you should still include wording on your formal wedding invitation, reception invitation, or another enclosure card regarding how guests can accept or deny their request for attendance. This may include a wedding website link so they can RSVP digitally, or a phone number to call and confirm their attendance.

If you are including RSVP cards, you'll need to include a pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelope with each RSVP card so your guests can easily send their responses back to you. The envelopes for your RSVP cards should have the name(s) and address of whoever is handling the RSVPs on the front. This could be you and your fiancé, either of your parents, your wedding planner, or someone in the wedding party. If you're handling the RSVPs yourselves, you may address the cards with both your full names or just one person's name if you and your partner live separately. A cute alternative is "The future [insert last name]s" if you're choosing to share a last name. It's also customary to include a stamp on each envelope so your guests don't need to pay for postage.

If you are going to ask guests to RSVP online, it's important to keep in mind that less tech-savvy loved ones might find it confusing. That said, there's no rule against having the best of both worlds! Feel free to give your guests multiple RSVP options so they can choose whichever they're most comfortable with. It may take a little more admin on your end, but you should hopefully receive everyone's responses a lot sooner.

If you're certain that all of your guests will be comfortable using an online wedding RSVP site, by all means, forgo the paper. Another idea is to include a phone number as an alternative option. That way, your less tech-savvy loved ones can call or text to submit their reply. Since you and your partner will be very busy in the leadup to your wedding day, we suggest appointing a member of the wedding party to handle phone RSVPs.

When it comes to the etiquette and wording for requesting RSVPs through your wedding website, templates can be extremely helpful—and you can be creative with them. You should be able to fit all the relevant details in one short sentence. Just make sure to include the full URL of your wedding website and the date you want guests to RSVP by. It's a good idea to request responses early (think: at least two weeks before your wedding date) so you've got time to confirm the final guest count with your caterer and venue.

Ready to get started? Check out these wedding website RSVP wording examples:

• Kindly respond by [date] at [website]
• RSVP online at [website] by [date]
• Please visit [website] to respond by [date]

How to word online RSVPs

While it is considered more traditional to send out physical RSVP cards, it is becoming increasingly common for couples to ask for RSVPs to be submitted online. This can be a convenient, cost-effective, and environmentally-friendly option.

Be Clear and Concise

Provide simple and straightforward instructions for your guests. Here are some examples:

• "Please RSVP by [date] on ourwebsite.com"
• "Kindly respond by [date] at www.theknot.com/ourweddingwebsite"
• "RSVP online by [date] at yourweddingwebsite.com"
• "Please RSVP on our wedding website: yourweddingwebsite.com"

Provide Additional Contact Information

Consider including an alternative method of contact, such as a phone number or email address, for guests who may have trouble with the online RSVP process.

Set a Clear Deadline

Be sure to include a specific date by which guests should respond. This will help you finalise numbers for your vendors. For example:

• "Kindly respond by May 15th at www.theknot.com/ourweddingwebsite"
• "Please RSVP by April 5th on ourwebsite.com"

Encourage Environmental Awareness

If you're concerned about the environmental impact of paper RSVPs, you can encourage guests to RSVP online by saying something like:

"Please help us do our part to save the environment and RSVP online at yourweddingwebsite.com"

Include a Note About Additional Events

If you are asking guests to RSVP for multiple events, such as a rehearsal dinner or brunch, be sure to mention this. For example:

"Please RSVP for our wedding and/or rehearsal dinner by [date] at yourweddingwebsite.com"

Remember to consider your guest list and whether they will be comfortable with online RSVPs. You may also want to include a separate card with your invitation that provides instructions for the online RSVP process.

What to include on RSVP cards

While it is considered acceptable to include RSVP information on your wedding invitation, it is more common to include this information on a separate card. This card can be placed inside the envelope with the invitation.

Space for Guests' Names

Traditionally, this is a long blank line that begins with a printed "M". This is where recipients will write the names of those planning to attend your wedding. A more modern alternative is to print the word "Name:" before the blank line.

The RSVP Deadline Date

The date by which you need the recipient's response should be prominently displayed on your RSVP cards. This gives your guests a sense of urgency to RSVP as soon as possible. For a more formal vibe, wording like "The favour of a reply is requested by" and "Your reply is requested by" are good options. For a more casual feel, "RSVP by" and "Please respond by" work well.

Accept or Decline Options

This is where guests will indicate whether they will be attending or not. Feel free to be as creative as you like here, or tie these responses into your wedding theme. For a more formal option, leave the card blank except for the RSVP deadline date, so that guests can fill in their own responses.

Meal Choices

If you'll be serving a sit-down dinner at your reception, include a small section at the bottom of the RSVP card where the recipient will select their choice of entrée. Be sure to be considerate of people who may have food allergies or dietary restrictions.

Accommodation Details

If you're inviting out-of-town guests, you may want to include a line that invites them to specify where they'll be staying. This is especially helpful if you have room blocks at hotels in the area, as it makes it easier to coordinate welcome gift bags and transportation.

Wedding RSVP etiquette

RSVP stands for "Répondez, s'il vous plaît", which is French for "respond, if you please". It is a crucial part of your wedding stationery suite. While it is not mandatory to include an RSVP card, it is helpful to prompt guests to respond in a timely manner and help you organize the seating chart, menu, and even music playlist.

If you choose not to include an RSVP card, you should still include information on your formal wedding invitation, reception invitation, or another enclosure card regarding how guests can accept or decline their request for attendance. This may include a wedding website link so they can RSVP digitally, or a phone number to call and confirm their attendance.

• Provide clear instructions: Ensure your guests know how to RSVP by providing clear instructions on the invitation or a separate card. You can also include a phone number or email address for guests who may have trouble with the website.
• Set a deadline: Set an RSVP deadline of at least two to three weeks before the wedding date. This will give you enough time to confirm the final headcount with your caterer and finalize your seating arrangements.
• Pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelopes: Include pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelopes with each RSVP card so that your guests can easily send their responses back to you.
• Online RSVPs: If you opt for online RSVPs, create a wedding website with an easy-to-use RSVP feature. This will allow guests to respond quickly and efficiently.
• Meal preferences: If you are serving dinner at your wedding, include meal preferences and dietary restrictions on the RSVP card. This will help your caterer prepare the appropriate amount of each meal option.
• Special requests: You can also include a special request line on the RSVP card, such as song requests, drink preferences, or a favorite memory of the couple.
• Paperless RSVPs: While traditional etiquette dictates physical response cards, it is becoming increasingly common to go paperless. If you are concerned about the environmental impact, you can opt for digital RSVPs or response cards printed on recycled paper.

Frequently asked questions