Guide To Perfectly Addressing Wedding Invitation Envelopes

Sending out wedding invitations is an exciting part of the wedding planning process. But before you pop those fresh-off-the-press invites in the mail, there are a few things you should know about formatting and addressing your envelopes. In this guide, we'll cover everything from the level of formality to the correct way to assemble and stuff your envelopes, so you can make sure your invitations are both accurate and respectful.

Formal vs informal invitation styles

The style of your wedding invitation—be it formal or informal—hinges on how traditional you want your wedding to be. If you're planning an upscale, black-tie affair, a formal invitation is the way to go. On the other hand, if you're after a casual vibe, an informal invitation is more suitable.

Formal Invitation Styles

The wording of formal wedding invitations is steeped in tradition. Here are some key characteristics:

• Everything is spelled out, including dates, times, and addresses.
• Middle names are included and written in full.
• Professional titles, such as "Doctor" or "Professor", are used.
• Formal names are used, with no nicknames.
• British spellings are used, e.g. "honour" instead of "honor".
• The return address is printed on the envelope's back flap.

Informal Invitation Styles

Informal wedding invitations are more relaxed and flexible in their wording. Here are some distinctive features:

• Abbreviations and modern wording layouts can be used.
• You don't have to use your full names.
• Fun formatting for dates and years is acceptable.
• First names can be used in the address.
• British spellings are not necessary.

Envelope Addressing

The way you address the envelopes can also reflect the style of your wedding. Here are some tips for both formal and informal addressing:

Formal Addressing:

• Use formal names and titles, e.g. "Mr. and Mrs."
• Spell out all words in the address, including "Street" and "Apartment".
• Write out the city and state in full, e.g. "Saint Paul, Minnesota".
• Include professional titles such as "Doctor" or "Professor".

Informal Addressing:

• Use first names, e.g. "Noah and Sara".
• Abbreviate words like "St." and "Apt."
• Use abbreviations for city and state, e.g. "CA" for California.

Finalising the guest list

Start with a Realistic Budget

The number of guests you invite will depend on your budget. The more people you invite, the more you'll spend on food, drinks, and other expenses. So, before finalising your guest list, determine how much you're willing to spend on the wedding. This will help you decide how many guests you can afford to invite.

Prioritize Close Loved Ones

Start by making a list of your VIPs, including close family members and friends who you couldn't imagine celebrating without. These are the people you'll want by your side on your special day.

Be Mindful of Family Dynamics

Traditionally, both sets of parents get a say in the guest list, especially if they are contributing financially. To avoid family drama and hurt feelings, consider giving each set of parents a certain percentage of the guest list. For example, you and your partner could take 50%, while each set of parents gets 25%. This way, everyone has a say, and it's fair.

Consider Travel Requirements

If you're having a destination wedding or a wedding that requires travel for most guests, keep in mind their travel needs. Consider visa rules, flight availability, and other factors that may impact their ability to attend.

Set a Policy for Plus-Ones

Decide early on whether you'll allow plus-ones and, if so, what the criteria will be. For example, you may only allow plus-ones for engaged or married couples, or those who have been together for a certain amount of time.

Be Consistent with Children

If you're having an adults-only wedding, be consistent with your policy. You may want to set an age limit, such as only allowing children over a certain age. Communicate this clearly to your guests to avoid any confusion or hurt feelings.

Don't Rush the Process

Titles and honorifics

Mr., Mrs., Miss, and Ms.

Use "Mr." for married or unmarried men. For unmarried women, use "Miss" if they are under 18 and "Ms." if they are over 18. "Ms." can also be used for married women, and is often preferred as it does not identify a woman by her marital status. "Mrs." is typically used for married women, even if they use their maiden name.

Mx.

Use "Mx." as a gender-neutral honorific. This is a good option for non-binary guests or if you are unsure of a guest's preferred title.

Dr.

For guests with a medical doctorate, write out "Doctor" on the outer envelope and abbreviate to "Dr." on the inner envelope. For academic doctors (Ph.D.), the "Dr." abbreviation is appropriate on both outer and inner envelopes.

Other Professional Titles

For guests with other professional titles, such as military personnel, judges, or lawyers, use their title on the outer envelope and abbreviate on the inner envelope if desired. When both members of a couple have professional titles, include them both in the address.

Children

For girls under 18, you can use "Miss" if you wish, but it is not necessary. Boys do not need a title until they are 16, at which point they can be addressed as "Mr.".

Abbreviations

Abbreviate titles such as "Mr.," "Mrs.," "Ms.," and "Jr." on the outer envelope. For the inner envelope, you can use either the abbreviated or the full form.

Full Names

Use guests' full names on the outer envelope, including their middle name if they are known. On the inner envelope, you can use just their first name for a more casual approach.

Plus-Ones

If a guest has a known plus-one, include their name on the inner envelope. If the plus-one is unknown, use "and Guest" on the inner envelope only.

Formality

The level of formality of your wedding will influence the style of addressing. For a formal, glamorous black-tie affair, opt for a traditional and elegant addressing style. A more casual, laid-back wedding may call for a relaxed approach, such as using first names only.

Inner Envelopes

Inner envelopes are more informal, giving you the option to leave out elements of the formal name format. You can use titles and last names, first names only, or a combination of both.

Inner and outer envelopes

Wedding invitations can include an inner and outer envelope, but inner envelopes are optional. The outer envelope is stamped and addressed, while the inner envelope only includes the names of the invitees. Inner envelopes were traditionally used to protect the invitation suite during transit, but they can be costly and are not as common anymore.

If you do choose to use an inner envelope, it should be unsealed but closed. The inner envelope is usually more informal since you have already addressed the guests on the outer envelope. Typically, it should only include a couple's titles with their respective last names. This is the same for single guests, too.

The outer envelope is primarily used for mailing and includes the guest's name(s) and address. The design of the outer envelope complements the overall aesthetic of everything enclosed, as well as the wedding itself.

If you are using two envelopes, insert the fully assembled invitation suite into the inner envelope (left edge first for a single-card invitation; folded edge first for a folded invitation). When the inner envelope flap is opened, you should see the printed side of the invitation. Insert the inner envelope into the outer envelope so that the handwritten guests' names on the inner envelope are visible when opened.

Assembly and stuffing

Once you have received your wedding invitations from the printer, you may be eager to start sending them out to your friends and family. However, if your invitation includes multiple cards and pieces, you may be unsure about how to assemble the suite and stuff the envelopes. Here is a step-by-step guide to help you through the process:

• Create an assembly line: Clear off a table and give it a wipe down to ensure your invitations stay pristine. Gather all the necessary pieces, including the invitation, any enclosure cards, envelopes, and adornments like belly bands, vellum or tissue paper overlays, ribbons, and wax seals.
• Start with the invitation: Place the invitation face up on the table, as it is usually the largest card in the suite.
• Add the tissue paper or vellum overlay: This step is optional, as tissue paper was traditionally used to prevent ink from smudging. If you choose to include it, place the tissue paper or vellum overlay on top of the invitation.
• Add the reception card: Place the reception card, if applicable, face-up on top of the invitation. This card includes the time, location, and any other important information for the wedding reception.
• Include other enclosure cards: Place any remaining enclosure cards, such as maps, hotel accommodation cards, and travel information, face up on top of the reception card. If there are multiple enclosure cards, start with the largest and work your way down to the smallest.
• Add the RSVP card and envelope: Place the reply envelope face down on top of the enclosure cards, with the reply card under the envelope flap, face up. Pre-address and stamp the reply envelope to make it easier for your guests to respond.
• Assemble the invitation suite: If you are using two envelopes (an inner and outer envelope), insert the assembled invitation suite into the inner envelope, with the left edge first for a single-card invitation or the folded edge first for a folded invitation. The printed side of the invitation should be visible when the envelope flap is opened. Then, insert the inner envelope into the outer envelope, ensuring the guests' names on the inner envelope are visible when opened. If you are using a single envelope, insert the fully assembled invitation suite directly into the outer envelope, following the same orientation as mentioned above.
• Seal the envelope: Use an envelope moistener to wet the gummed edge of the envelope, being careful to not use too much to avoid sogginess. Place a heavy book on top of the stack of sealed envelopes to ensure they are securely sealed.
• Add the return address: Include address labels, rubber stamps, or skinny wraps on each envelope to indicate the return address.
• Mail your invitations: Before mailing, bring a fully assembled invitation to the post office to have it weighed, as additional postage may be required depending on the weight and any embellishments. Request hand-cancelling at the post office to prevent damage caused by machines.

By following these steps, you can ensure that your wedding invitations are assembled and stuffed correctly, creating a memorable first impression for your guests.

Frequently asked questions