Wedding Invitation Etiquette: Where You're Registered

Wedding invitation wording is a tricky business. While you want to ensure your guests have all the information they need, you also don't want to come across as presumptuous or rude. So, when it comes to letting your guests know where you are registered, what is the best way to go about it?

Don't put registry information on wedding invites

When it comes to wedding planning, there are many questions about what to include on your wedding invitations. One common question is whether or not to include registry information. While it may seem convenient to include this information, it is generally not considered good etiquette. Here are some reasons why you shouldn't put registry information on your wedding invitations:

It Can Come Across as Presumptuous or Aggressive

Including registry information on your wedding invitations can be interpreted as putting more importance on receiving gifts than on sharing your special day with loved ones. Even if that is not your intention, it may give guests the wrong impression. It is important to remember that your wedding invitations are primarily about inviting guests to celebrate your marriage, not about asking for gifts.

It's Not the Right Spot to Ask for Gifts

While it is standard to include RSVP cards, reception cards, and wedding programs in the same envelope as your wedding invitation, registry information is not typically included. Asking for gifts or money on your formal invitation can be seen as inappropriate. Instead, you can include an informational insert in the envelope with a link to your wedding website, where guests can find your registry information.

It May Make Guests Feel Obligated

Including registry information on your wedding invitation can make guests feel like they are expected to bring a gift, even if that is not your intention. Gifts should never be required, and your invitation should focus on building excitement for your celebration. You want your guests to feel honoured and delighted to be part of your special day, without feeling pressured to bring a present.

There Are Other Ways to Share Your Registry

There are more subtle ways to inform your guests about your registry. Word of mouth is a traditional method that is still effective. You can share the details with your close family and wedding party, and they can spread the word on your behalf. Additionally, including a link to your wedding website on your save-the-date or on an information card in your wedding invitation suite is a more subtle approach. Guests can then easily access your registry information without it being the main focus of your invitation.

Include registry information on bridal shower invites

While it is considered rude to include registry information on wedding invitations, it is perfectly acceptable to include it on bridal shower invites. Here are some tips and suggestions for doing so:

Including Registry Information on Bridal Shower Invites

• It is common and expected to include registry information on bridal shower invites. The purpose of a bridal shower is to shower the bride with love and gifts, so guests will want and need to know what the couple would like to receive.
• The host of the bridal shower, such as the bride's mother, aunt, or friend, can include a link or note about the registry on the invitation. This is preferable to the bride or groom asking for gifts directly, which may be considered rude.
• There are two ways to include registry information: by directing guests to the couple's wedding website or by listing the specific stores the couple is registered at.
• For example, you can write: "For registry information, please visit [insert website here]" or " [Name] is registered at [store 1], [store 2], and [store 3]."
• If you have multiple registries, you can include them all on the invitation or provide a separate card with the registry information.
• If you are concerned about older guests who may not be comfortable with technology, it is a good idea to list the specific stores on the invitation or include a separate card with this information.
• If you have a small, intimate bridal shower with only close friends, you can use email invitations and include the registry information digitally. However, if family members such as grandmothers or older relatives are included, it is best to use printed invitations.
• Remember to include other essential details on the bridal shower invitation, such as the guest of honour's name, the date, time, location, RSVP information, and the name of the host(s).

Spread registry information by word of mouth

Word of mouth is an effective way to spread information about your wedding registry. Here are some tips to make the most of it:

Choose the Right People to Spread the Word

It is essential to select the right people to share your wedding registry information. Choose individuals who are close to you and your partner, such as immediate family members, bridesmaids, and groomsmen. These individuals can act as your ambassadors and spread the word on your behalf.

Provide Clear and Concise Information

When sharing your wedding registry details, ensure that the information is clear and concise. Communicate the relevant websites, stores, or platforms where guests can find your registry. If there are specific instructions or directions, make sure to include those as well.

Be Mindful of Your Tone and Approach

When discussing your wedding registry through word of mouth, it's important to maintain a respectful and gracious tone. Avoid giving the impression that gifts are expected or required. Instead, emphasize that the presence and well-wishes of your guests are more than enough.

Leverage Social Gatherings and Conversations

Take advantage of social gatherings, such as bridal showers or pre-wedding events, as opportunities to casually spread the word about your registry. Conversations with guests can be a natural way to share the information without making it the primary focus of your interactions.

Be Responsive to Guest Inquiries

If guests reach out to you directly to inquire about your wedding registry, be responsive and provide the necessary information. This can be a more personal approach to sharing the details while still respecting the wishes of those who may not want to receive this information.

Maintain Consistency with Other Communication Channels

Ensure that the information shared through word of mouth aligns with the details provided on your wedding website or any other communication channels you may be using. Consistency will help avoid confusion and ensure that your guests have accurate information.

Remember, word of mouth is a powerful tool, and by following these suggestions, you can effectively share your wedding registry details while maintaining a gracious and respectful tone.

Include registry information on a wedding website

Wedding websites are a great way to share your registry information without appearing greedy. Here are some tips to include registry information on your wedding website:

Include a Registry Page on Your Wedding Website

Creating a registry page on your wedding website is a subtle and polite way to share your registry information with your guests. This allows guests to easily access the information and choose gifts without any hassle. It is recommended to use careful wording when introducing this page, such as "If you wish to give a gift to the bride and groom..." to ensure guests know that gift-giving is optional.

Provide Links to Online Stores

Include links to the online stores where you have registered to make it convenient for your guests to access them directly from your wedding website. This simplifies the process for your guests and allows them to choose gifts from a variety of options.

Share Your Wedding Website on Save the Dates

While you don't need to include specific registry information on your save-the-dates, you can include your wedding website. This way, all invited guests will have access to your website and can explore it to find more details about your wedding, including your registry information.

Avoid Mentioning Gifts on Your Wedding Invitation

It is important to avoid any direct mention of gifts on your wedding invitation, even if you are requesting no presents. Including registry information on the invitation could send the wrong message to your guests, implying that you expect a gift from them. Instead, include your wedding website on the invitation, allowing guests to find registry details on their own.

Spread the Word Through Family and Friends

In addition to your wedding website, rely on word-of-mouth to share your registry information. Inform your immediate family, bridesmaids, and groomsmen, and let them know they can spread the word on your behalf. This traditional approach ensures that guests who may not be tech-savvy can still access the information they need.

Include registry information on save-the-date cards

Save-the-date cards are a modern invention in the world of weddings. They are a great way to announce your wedding and keep your guests informed. Here is some advice on how to include registry information on your save-the-date cards:

Do include your wedding website

It is generally considered poor taste to include any registry information on your save-the-date cards. Instead, include your wedding website, where guests can find more in-depth information about your big day, including registry details. This is a subtle approach to asking for gifts from guests.

Don't send them too early

Sending save-the-date cards six to seven months before the wedding is good practice. For destination weddings, you can send them up to nine months ahead. Sending them earlier may be too presumptuous, and sending them later may not give your guests enough notice.

Do include your names, the location, and the exact wedding date

It is important to include your names, the location, and the exact wedding date on your save-the-date cards. You can include the venue as a surprise, but at least include the city, state, and country if it is an overseas wedding.

Don't include reply cards

There is no need to include RSVP cards with your save-the-date cards. Guests are not expected to respond until they receive the formal invitation.

Do add your wedding hashtag and wedding website

Including a wedding hashtag is a great way to get guests excited and involved in your wedding planning. Providing the URL to your wedding website allows guests to access further details and fun facts.

Frequently asked questions