Guide To Phrasing Wedding Invites: Divorced Parents Edition

Wedding invitation wording can be a minefield, especially when dealing with divorced parents. The good news is that there are some simple rules to follow to ensure your invites are both elegant and etiquette-compliant. The basic rule of thumb is to tread lightly – you don't want to open old wounds or draw attention to a parent's unmarried status. The safest bet is to list your natural parents' names only and on separate lines. If a stepparent has played an important role in your life, it is appropriate to include their name on the same line as their spouse. If you are faced with multiple sets of remarried parents, either list each couple on their own line or use the phrase Together with their families to keep the invitation uncluttered.

Mother and father's names are written on separate lines

If you have divorced parents and want to include both of them on your wedding invitations, the general rule is to write the mother's name and the father's name on separate lines. The mother's name should always come first.

Divorced parents, woman kept her married name:

> Ms. Sarah Smith

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

Divorced parents, woman uses maiden name:

> Ms. Sarah Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Divorced parents, woman remarried:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Divorced parents, both parents remarried:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

No matter the scenario, remember to omit the "and" between the mother's and father's names, as this signifies marriage.

No 'and' between divorced parents' names

When addressing wedding invitations to guests, it is important to consider the feelings of all parties involved, especially in the case of divorced parents. Here are some guidelines and examples to help you navigate this delicate situation:

No "And" Between Divorced Parents' Names:

Omit the "and" between divorced parents' names: This is an important detail to remember. The "and" signifies marriage and is only used to unite married couples.

Mother Listed First:

The mother's name is always listed first, followed by the father's name on a separate line. This format applies regardless of whether the parents have remarried or not.

Using "Ms." or "Mrs.":

You can use either "Ms." or "Mrs." before the mother's name. Using "Ms." may eliminate confusion, especially if the woman has remarried and taken a new last name.

Divorced Parents, Not Remarried:

• If the divorced parents are not remarried and the woman kept her married name: "Ms. Sarah Smith / Mr. John Smith request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter / Michael Alan Timmons."
• If the divorced parents are not remarried and the woman uses her maiden name: "Ms. Sarah Jones / Mr. John Smith request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter / Michael Alan Timmons."

Divorced Parents, Woman Remarried:

If the mother has remarried and has a different last name: "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones / Mr. John Smith request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter / Michael Alan Timmons."

Divorced Parents, Both Remarried:

If both parents are remarried: "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones / Mr. and Mrs. John Smith request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter / Michael Alan Timmons."

Remember to be mindful of everyone's feelings and keep the invitation wording simple and direct.

Include bride's last name to prevent confusion

When it comes to wedding invitation wording, there are a few considerations to keep in mind, especially when dealing with divorced parents. Here are some guidelines to help you navigate this situation gracefully and ensure your invitations are clear and elegant.

Include the Bride's Last Name to Prevent Confusion

Including the bride's last name on the wedding invitation is essential to prevent any confusion, especially when dealing with divorced parents. This is particularly relevant when the mother has remarried and changed her last name, or if the mother has returned to her maiden name, resulting in the mother and father having different last names. Here's how to phrase such invitations:

Divorced parents, mother remarried:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Mother's New Last Name]

> Mr. [Father's Last Name]

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> [Bride's Full Name]

For example:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Divorced parents, both parents remarried:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Mother's New Last Name]

> Mr. and Mrs. [Father's Last Name]

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> [Bride's Full Name]

For example:

> Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jones

> Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

> request the pleasure of your company at the wedding of their daughter

> Michael Alan Timmons

Additional Tips for Wording Wedding Invitations with Divorced Parents:

• The mother's name is always listed first, whether she is remarried or not.
• Use "Ms." or "Mrs." for the mother's title, but "Ms." is preferred to eliminate any confusion.
• Do not use "and" between the mother's and father's names, as it signifies marriage.
• If the bride's parents are divorced and the mother is remarried, include the bride's last name to avoid ambiguity.
• If both sets of parents are divorced, follow the same guidelines for each set of parents, keeping their names on separate lines.
• If the bride's parents are divorced and only the mother is hosting, use the following format:

> Ms./Mrs. [Mother's Last Name] requests the pleasure of your company at the wedding of her daughter [Bride's Full Name]

Remember, these are just guidelines, and you can adjust them to fit your specific situation and preferences. The most important thing is to word the invitations in a way that feels right for you and your family.

Include deceased parent's name as a way of honouring them

Including a deceased parent's name on a wedding invitation is a thoughtful way to honour their memory and their role in your life. Here are some suggestions on how to do this:

Formal Wording

If you're opting for a formal or traditional wedding invitation, here's an example of how to include a deceased parent's name:

> [Name of Deceased Parent] and [Name of Surviving Parent or Step-parent]

> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter/son

> [Name of Bride/Groom], daughter/son of the late [Name of Deceased Parent] and [Name of Other Parent]

> [Date, time and location of the wedding]

For instance:

> Mrs Sharon Henderson and the late Mr Nathan Henderson

> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter

> Preston John Brackman, daughter of the late Mr Nathan Henderson and Mrs Sharon Henderson

> Saturday, the twenty-first of July, Two-thousand and twenty-six, at six o'clock in the evening, Dripping Springs, Texas

Informal Wording

If you prefer a less formal tone, you could use the following format:

> [Name of Surviving Parent] and the late [Name of Deceased Parent]

> [Name of Bride/Groom], daughter/son of the late [Name of Deceased Parent] and [Name of Other Parent]

> [Date, time and location of the wedding]

An example of this would be:

> Fatima and the late Arjun Sharma

> Avery June, daughter of the late Arjun Sharma and Sarah Sharma

> Saturday, July 21st, 2024, at 6:00 pm, Bluxome Street Winery, San Francisco, California

Same-Sex Weddings

The above examples can be adapted for same-sex weddings by swapping "daughter" for "son" or "bride" for "groom". Here's an example:

> Mr and Mr Aster

> son of Mr and Mrs Brady Aster and the late Mr Jim Hanson

> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their son

> [Name of Groom], son of the late Mr Jim Hanson and Mr and Mrs Brady Aster

> [Date, time and location of the wedding]

Step-parents and Other Family Members

If you'd like to include a step-parent or another family member, such as a grandparent, you can do so. Here's an example:

> [Name of Step-parent] and [Name of Deceased Parent's Spouse or Partner]

> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of [Name of Deceased Parent's Spouse or Partner's daughter/son]

> [Name of Bride/Groom], daughter/son of the late [Name of Deceased Parent] and [Name of Other Parent]

> [Date, time and location of the wedding]

For instance:

> Moira and Alistair Schiller

> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of her

> and the late Porter Blackman's daughter

> [Name of Bride], daughter of the late Porter Blackman and Moira Schiller

> [Date, time and location of the wedding]

How to word a reception-only wedding invitation

If you're having a reception-only wedding, it's important to be clear in your invitations that the event is just a reception—no ceremony included. Here are some tips and examples to help you word your invitations appropriately.

What to Include

On the invitation, instead of inviting guests to witness your marriage, the wording should indicate that guests are invited to a reception celebrating your marriage. Here are some examples of wording you can use:

• " [Names of the couple] request the pleasure of your company for a reception in celebration of their new marriage"
• " [Names of the couple] request the pleasure of your company for a wedding reception, following an intimate wedding ceremony with close friends and family"
• "The newlyweds [Names of the couple] invite you to a reception in honour of their recent marriage"

Invitation Wording Samples

• "Emily Katherine Schwartz and Sarah Andrew Gordon will be married in a small ceremony on Saturday the sixth of October. Please join us in celebration at their wedding reception on Saturday the twentieth of October, two thousand eighteen, at half-past six o'clock in the evening, Brooklyn Winery, Brooklyn, New York."
• "Wedding Reception Celebrating the Wedding of Imani Ellington and Jason Ward. The honour of your presence is requested on Saturday, the thirty-first of March, 2018, at the home of Mr. and Mrs. Ellington, 6850 Veranda Avenue, Pasadena, California."
• "Kevin and Christopher. Together with their parents, Kevin Baron and Christopher Baron invite you to celebrate their union at a wedding reception following the ceremony. Join us for hors d'oeuvres, drinks, dessert, and dancing at Calamigos Ranch in Malibu at 4 p.m. on April 15, 2018."
• "With great love and joy, Mr. and Mrs. Ryan Johnson and Mr. and Mrs. Lee Chang kindly invite you to a reception celebrating the marriage of their children, Christine and Lee, on Saturday, August 11, 2018."
• "Victoria and Tristan. Just married! Victoria and Tristan invite you to join them for a celebration with the newlyweds at noon on Saturday, June 2, 2018, at The Peninsula Beverly Hills. RSVP by May 15, 2018, at www.Tristan-Victoria.wedding."
• "We're married! Please join Dahlia and Miguel for cocktails, dinner, and dancing and help us celebrate the happy occasion! On November 3, 2018, at Perch in Los Angeles."

Divorced Parents

If your parents are divorced, there are a few different ways you can word the invitation, depending on who is hosting and whether you want to include both parents. Here are some options:

• If your mother is hosting and your father is not remarried: "Mrs. [Mother's name] requests the pleasure of your company at the wedding reception of her daughter [Your name] and [Partner's name]."
• If your father is hosting and your mother is not remarried: "Mr. [Father's name] requests the pleasure of your company at the wedding reception of his daughter [Your name] and [Partner's name]."
• If both divorced parents are hosting: "Mrs. [Mother's name] and Mr. [Father's name] request the pleasure of your company at the wedding reception of their daughter [Your name] and [Partner's name]."
• If one or both parents are remarried: Include your step-parent's name on the same line as your parent's name, for example: "Mr. and Mrs. [Father's name] and [Mother's name] request the pleasure of your company at the wedding reception of their daughter [Your name] and [Partner's name]."

Other Considerations

When wording your reception-only wedding invitations, there are a few other things to keep in mind:

• Timing: If you're having the ceremony and reception on the same day, try to schedule the ceremony earlier in the day to give you plenty of time to celebrate with your intimate group of guests before the reception.
• Guest list: Create two separate guest lists, one for the ceremony and reception, and one for just the reception. Stick to your original decision about who is invited to the ceremony to avoid confusion and hurt feelings.
• Invitation design: You can print two different invitations, one for the ceremony and reception and one for the reception-only guests, or print one invitation with the reception information and include a separate card with ceremony details for those invited to the ceremony.

Frequently asked questions