Asking your closest friends to be your bridesmaids is a special opportunity to show them how much they mean to you. It can be a fun process, but it's also a big deal, so it's important to put some thought into how you'll propose to your crew. One way to do this is by writing them a heartfelt letter or a bridesmaid proposal card. This can be a bit daunting, so here are some tips on what to include and how to structure your message.
First, start with a greeting. This can be formal or casual, depending on your relationship with your friend. You can also hint at what's to come, as your friends may already suspect they'll be included in your big day. Next, add a touch of sentiment by recalling some special moments from your friendship. Be sure to express your excitement for the future and all the fun things you'll get to plan together, like the wedding shower and bachelorette party.
Finally, pop the question! You can be as creative or straightforward as you like, but make sure you explicitly ask your friend to be your bridesmaid. You can add some extra fluff by telling them you can't imagine taking this step without them. So, get writing, and happy planning!
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Greeting | A formal greeting or use of a childhood nickname |
Tone | Sweet, sincere, and sentimental |
Nostalgia | Recounting memorable moments from your friendship |
Big Ask | "Will you be my bridesmaid?" |
Excitement | A glimpse of all the fun things to come, from the wedding shower to the bachelorette party |
What You'll Learn
Asking your bridesmaids in person
Asking your friends to be your bridesmaids is a big deal. These are the women who will be helping you plan, celebrate, and support you on your big day. While you can be as creative as you want when creating a bridesmaid proposal, asking them in person is a more formal and intimate approach. Here are some ideas and tips for asking your bridesmaids in person:
One-on-one chats:
If you're looking for a low-key and intimate approach, consider having one-on-one conversations with each of your prospective bridesmaids. This allows you to share the news in a personal and meaningful way. You can meet up for coffee, schedule a video call, or even invite them over to your place for a chat. This gives you an opportunity to explain what being a bridesmaid entails and gives them a chance to ask any questions or voice any concerns they may have.
Group gathering:
If your bridesmaids-to-be live nearby, consider inviting them all together for a group gathering. This could be a fun brunch, a dinner party, or even a casual get-together at your place. You can pop the question with personalized champagne glasses and bottles of bubbly, or include a creative element such as customized T-shirts or totes that reveal the question. This approach allows you to ask all your bridesmaids at once and creates a celebratory atmosphere for everyone to enjoy.
Creative ways to "pop the question":
- Blow up confetti-filled balloons and put a safety pin inside, along with a note that says, "Pop me!"
- Set up a coffee date and ask the barista to write "Will you be my bridesmaid?" on their cup.
- Give each person a personalized dress hanger or a bridesmaid robe for the wedding day.
- Host a wine and paint night, a pottery class, or a flower-arranging workshop and pop the question during the event.
- Treat your bridesmaids-to-be to a mani-pedi and gift them with a bottle of nail polish in your wedding color.
- Create custom puzzles with photos of you and your friend, with text that says, "Be my bridesmaid?"
Follow-up conversations:
Remember that being a bridesmaid is a commitment, and your friends may have questions or concerns about the responsibilities involved. It's a good idea to have follow-up conversations with each of your bridesmaids after you've popped the question. This gives them an opportunity to discuss any potential conflicts or financial considerations. It also allows you to ensure that they have all the information they need about the wedding and their role in it.
Introductions and bonding:
If your bridesmaids don't all know each other, it's a good idea to facilitate introductions and help them bond before the wedding. Set up a group text, email, or Facebook group to get everyone connected. If they live nearby, organize an in-person meeting, such as a cooking class, a winery tour, or a signature cocktail-making session. These shared experiences will help your bridesmaids form a bond and create lasting memories.
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Sending a card
Greeting
Start your card with a greeting. You can keep it formal or address your friend using a nickname. This will set the tone for the rest of your message. You might also want to include a hint about what's to come. They might already suspect that they'll be included in your big day, but it's always fun to build anticipation.
A Trip Down Memory Lane
Include a bit of sentiment in your card. Weddings are emotional, not just for you but for everyone witnessing your special day. Take a trip down memory lane and recall some hallmark moments from your friendship. You can talk about how they've stuck by you through tough times or how you've shared big life changes. This will add a touch of emotion to your message.
Pop the Question
Be direct and ask the question, "Will you be my bridesmaid?" You can also add some additional sentiments, like expressing that you can't imagine taking this step without them. Make sure to ask them to join your wedding party explicitly, so there's no room for confusion.
A Peek at the Excitement
Give them a glimpse of the exciting journey ahead. Talk about the wedding shower, bachelorette party, and any other fun activities you have planned. Let them know that agreeing to be a part of your wedding party marks the beginning of a fun and memorable season in your lives.
Examples
"I can't believe I'm writing you this card! You've been just as excited for Jess to pop the question as I have. Thank you for all the support you've given us throughout our relationship. I can't walk down that aisle without you by my side. Will you be my bridesmaid? We have so much fun stuff to start planning, like a Cabo bachelorette party!"
"You're my sister, and over time, you've become my best friend, too. You've been there for me through all the important moments in my life, cheering me on endlessly. Marrying my partner will bring joy to my life, and I hope it will bring joy to yours as well. You always said you wanted a brother! Will you be my bridesmaid? I couldn't do it without you!"
"To my (other) soulmate, you probably know why I'm writing this card, but I want to express how much you mean to me. We've been friends since second grade, and you've been there for me through it all. My wedding day would be incomplete without you. Will you do me the honor of being my maid of honor? I can't wait to celebrate all the new firsts with you and get you up on the bar during my bachelorette party!"
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Giving a gift
There are a few occasions when it's traditional to give gifts to your bridal party. The first is when you propose to them, becoming your bridal party. The second is at the bridal luncheon, usually held the day before the wedding or during the wedding week. This is a great time to give them something they can wear at the wedding, like robes or pyjamas. If you're not having a bridal luncheon, you can also give them gifts when you're all getting ready together on the morning of the wedding. Be sure to let your photographer know so they can capture the moment!
If you're wondering what kinds of gifts to give, here are some ideas:
- Something they can wear while getting ready, like a piece of jewellery to wear down the aisle
- Robes or pyjamas to wear while getting ready on the wedding day
- A special dress hanger that's been personalised with their name
- A bridesmaid robe for them to wear while getting ready
- Mini bottles of champagne or their favourite perfume
- Monogrammed slippers, tote bags, or jewellery
- Sweet treats, like champagne gummies or truffles
- A bottle of their favourite wine or a set of wine paraphernalia
- A gift card or self-care goodies
Remember, it's not about how much you spend but rather showing your gratitude and excitement for their involvement in your special day.
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Planning a get-together
Embrace the Group Mentality:
It's important to introduce your bridesmaids to each other and foster a sense of community. Send a group email with everyone's names, roles, contact information, and a fun fact about each person. This will help break the ice and encourage conversation.
Set Up a Group Chat or Social Media Group:
If your bridesmaids are spread out across the country, consider creating a group chat or a private social media group. This will provide a platform for everyone to interact, get to know each other, and stay updated on wedding details. It's also a great way to share ideas and plan activities for the get-together.
Make the Introductions:
While you may want to be involved in all the conversations, remember that your bridesmaids will also need to communicate directly with each other. Step back and let them take the lead on certain aspects, such as choosing their attire or coordinating hair and makeup schedules. Trust that they will work together effectively.
Suggest Fun Activities:
Plan an activity that everyone can enjoy and that will help your bridesmaids bond. Here are some ideas:
- Take a group cooking class or a mixology class to create your signature cocktail for the wedding.
- Go on a winery tour and tasting, especially if you and your bridesmaids share a love for wine.
- Organize a dinner tour at your favorite local spots, with each course at a different location.
- Try something unique like a psychic lunch or a surfing lesson if your wedding is on a beach.
Provide a Timeline and Practical Information:
Share a timeline of events for the get-together, including arrival times, activities, and any other relevant details. Let them know about food arrangements and suggest nearby restaurants if they need to grab a bite. Remind them to bring comfortable shoes and any other essentials.
Add a Personal Touch:
Include a heartfelt note with your invitation, expressing your excitement to have them by your side on your special day. You can also share some of your favorite music or send a small gift to get everyone in the wedding spirit.
Remember, the goal of this get-together is to bring your bridesmaids together, create lasting memories, and build excitement for your upcoming nuptials!
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Bachelorette party ideas
Planning a bachelorette party can be a lot of fun, but it can also be a little tricky, especially if you want to be creative and do something a little different. Here are some ideas to get you started:
Choose a Theme
Themes can be a great way to make any bachelorette party more fun and can create opportunities for creative decorations and costumes. For example, a "Cowboy Disco" theme where everyone dresses in rhinestones and cowboy boots, or a "'Til Death Do Us Party" theme to celebrate the "death" of the bride's single days.
Pick a Location
If you're planning a weekend-long bachelorette party, it's important to choose a location that is an equal distance for most guests to travel. Other factors to consider include the weather, distance to amenities, and types of accommodation available.
Plan Some Activities
- Attend a cooking class – A fun and creative idea where the group can learn to make a new dish, recreate the bride's favourite meal, or even make sushi!
- Winery or brewery hopping – A classic option if you live near vineyards. If not, most cities have a collection of breweries that can be visited.
- Girls' night in – Why go out when you can stay in with a few bottles of wine, a rom-com, face masks, and charcuterie boards? You can also do each other's nails, play games, or just relax.
- Scavenger hunt – Split the group into teams and set a bachelorette-themed scavenger hunt. This can be a lot of fun, especially for competitive groups.
- Host a picnic – Get out of the house, wear cute outfits, and enjoy snacks and drinks in a park. Pick a beautiful location, and you'll have the perfect backdrop for photos.
- Go hiking or camping – For the outdoorsy types, hiking or camping can be a perfect bachelorette activity. Bring supplies for s'mores or even a bottle of champagne.
- Joint bachelor and bachelorette party – If the bride and groom share a friend group, why not combine parties?
- Escape room – A fun activity for a small group, especially if you're looking for something other than a night out on the town.
- Paint night – A fun and creative activity, usually held at a restaurant, where you can enjoy a meal and create a painting.
- Laser tag, mini golf, or board games – For groups that enjoy a little friendly competition.
- Private yoga class – Start the day with a relaxing and refreshing activity. Many instructors will come to your house or hotel for a private class.
- Progressive dinner – Visit multiple restaurants and enjoy different courses of a meal at each location. This is a fun way to sample different cuisines and bond with your group.
- Private chef dinner – Indulge in a luxurious and intimate activity by hiring a private chef to come to your house or rental and cook a customised meal.
- Make your own perfume – Plan a day of making bespoke scents with a professional, and the bride can even wear her new perfume on her wedding day.
- Bowling – Rent out a bowling alley and enjoy food and drinks while partaking in a friendly competition.
- Murder mystery party – Hire a company to plan a private, personalised murder mystery party with different themes and eras to choose from.
- Axe-throwing – Try something different and visit an axe-throwing bar for a fun-filled day of brews and axe-throwing.
- Volunteering – Give back by volunteering together at a charity or organisation that the bride is passionate about.
- Candle-making class – Learn about the art of candle-making and take home your own hand-made candles.
- Spa day – A classic bachelorette activity for groups that want to relax and be pampered. Book appointments for massages, facials, mani-pedis, or any other treatments.
- Line dancing class – Learn the basics of line dancing and don't forget your cowboy hats!
- Ghost tour – Learn about the haunted history of your party destination with a spooky and exciting ghost tour.
- Karaoke party – Rent a karaoke machine or go to a karaoke bar and sing the night away.
- Sunflower picking – Spend a day surrounded by nature, picking sunflowers at a local farm. If there are no sunflower fields nearby, try apple or strawberry picking, or visit a lavender field.
Remember, the most important thing is to focus on the bride's preferences and choose activities that suit her friend group. Whether it's a lively party or a relaxing getaway, there are plenty of options to create an unforgettable bachelorette party.
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Frequently asked questions
It is a good idea to start with a greeting. You can keep it formal and sophisticated or go with their embarrassing decades-old nickname. You can also hint at what's to come, as they probably suspect they'll be included in your big day.
It is a good idea to be sweet, sincere, and sentimental. You can also add some personality to it, whether it's your dirty sense of humour or your sappy side.
You can take a trip down memory lane and recall some hallmark moments from your friendship. You can also be straightforward and ask them to be your bridesmaid directly.
You can tell them you can't imagine taking this big step without them and that your wedding day would be incomplete without them. You can also mention some exciting things to come, like the wedding shower and bachelorette party.