The best man's speech is a highlight of any wedding, and while it's just about 10 minutes on the day, it's a memory that lasts a lifetime. The best man is expected to be funny, but there's a fine line between paying a compliment and being creepy. While it's expected for the best man to say something nice about the bridesmaids, it's important to keep it respectful and not objectify them. The focus of the joke should be self-deprecating rather than lecherous. It's also important to keep the speech clean, avoiding offensive or inappropriate remarks, and to make sure it's not too long, with 8 to 10 minutes being the ideal length.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Introduction | A creative, personalised opening that grabs the audience's attention. |
Acknowledgement | Thank the bridesmaids for their support and hard work. |
Tone | Keep it lighthearted, positive, and respectful. Avoid being creepy or lecherous. |
Length | Keep it concise, between 3-10 minutes. |
Content | Include a mix of humour, sincerity, and meaningful stories or anecdotes about the groom. |
Delivery | Rehearse, use appropriate body language, and maintain eye contact with the audience. |
What You'll Learn
Thanking the bridesmaids on behalf of the groom
Keep it Simple
You can, of course, choose to keep it simple and sincere. Something along the lines of:
"The bride and groom have asked me to make a special mention of the bridesmaids, who have done so much to help the day run so smoothly. They were charming and decorative, and I know they gave [Bride] all the support she needed. You could say they added the finishing touch to a fairy tale wedding."
Inject Some Humour
If you want to make this part of your speech more light-hearted, you could try something like:
"I'd like to thank the bridesmaids on behalf of the groom. They look amazing, and they performed their role to perfection. As I was walking past them earlier, I heard them all talking about who will get to have the first dance with the best man. 'You!' 'No, you!' 'No way!' It was all very touching. Not one of them wanted to see their friend miss out. At least, that's how I'm reading it."
Make it Self-Deprecating
Self-deprecating humour is always a good way to go when it comes to wedding speeches. You could say something like:
"How fantastic are our bridesmaids today? They look amazing and, unlike the best man, they managed to get themselves ready without any disasters. I, on the other hand, managed to spill coffee down my shirt this morning and had to ask the pageboy to help me with my tie."
Focus on the Bride
If you want to make the bride the focus of this part of the speech, you could say something like:
"The bridesmaids look absolutely beautiful today, but not as beautiful as the bride, of course. They have been a fantastic support to [Bride] today, and I know she is incredibly grateful to have them by her side."
Thank the Guests
You could also use this opportunity to thank the guests for coming, while also acknowledging the bridesmaids:
"I'd like to thank everyone for coming today and helping to make this such a special occasion for the happy couple. I'd also like to thank the bridesmaids, who have added so much to the day. They look amazing, and I know they have been a fantastic support to [Bride]."
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Complimenting the bridesmaids' appearance
As the best man, you are expected to thank the bridesmaids and compliment their appearance. Here are some ways to do this:
"I would like to thank the groom for his kind words on behalf of the bridesmaids, who look absolutely wonderful and have done a fantastic job today."
"Firstly, I would just like to say how beautiful the bridesmaids look, who have only been outshone by the bride herself, who looks amazing today."
"The bride and groom have asked me to make a special mention of the bridesmaids, who have done so much to help the day run so smoothly. They were charming and decorative and gave the bride all the support she needed. In fact, you could say they added the finishing touch to a fairy tale wedding."
"How fantastic are our bridesmaids today? They look amazing, and they performed their role to perfection. As I was walking past them earlier, I heard them all talking about who will get to have the first dance with the best man later. 'You!' 'No! You!' 'No way!' It was all very touching. Not one of them wanted to see their friend miss out. At least, that's how I'm reading it."
"My thanks to the groom on behalf of the bridesmaids for his kind words about how wonderful they all look. But that's your lot now, Dave. It's only fair that us single guys get a look-in."
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Avoiding objectification
As the best man, you are expected to acknowledge the bridesmaids in your speech. However, it is important to avoid objectification and keep your comments respectful. Here are some tips and suggestions for how to do this effectively:
Keep it Respectful
It is important to be mindful and respectful when mentioning the bridesmaids in your speech. Avoid making comments that objectify or demean them. Steer clear of lewd jokes or innuendos that may be seen as creepy or inappropriate. Remember, the bridesmaids are not there to be eye candy or to entertain the male guests. They are an important part of the wedding party and deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.
Focus on Their Contributions
A good way to acknowledge the bridesmaids without objectifying them is to focus on their contributions to the wedding. Thank them for their support, hard work, and dedication in making the day special for the bride and groom. You can mention specific tasks or duties they performed that made a difference. For example, "I want to thank the bridesmaids, who went above and beyond to ensure today was perfect. Their hard work and dedication truly made this day magical for the happy couple."
Compliment Their Personal Qualities
Instead of focusing solely on their physical appearance, compliment the bridesmaids on their personal qualities, such as their kindness, thoughtfulness, or loyalty. For example, "The bridesmaids have been an incredible source of support and strength for the bride. Their kindness and generosity have made this journey even more special." You can also mention how they have enhanced the wedding with their unique personalities or added a touch of fun and laughter to the day.
Avoid Sexist Stereotypes
Refrain from using sexist stereotypes or making assumptions about the bridesmaids' roles. Avoid comments that reinforce the idea that bridesmaids are merely decorative or that their primary role is to look beautiful. Instead, recognise their individuality and celebrate their unique qualities. For example, "Each bridesmaid brought their own unique personality and style to the wedding, and together, they created an unforgettable atmosphere of joy and celebration."
Keep it Tasteful
If you do want to make a comment about the bridesmaids' appearance, keep it tasteful and respectful. Avoid comments that are overly sexualised or suggestive. A simple, "The bridesmaids look stunning today, and their presence has added to the beauty and joy of this occasion," is more appropriate than something that objectifies or reduces them to their physical appearance.
Make it Personal
If you have a personal connection to the bridesmaids, feel free to share a brief anecdote or story that highlights their positive qualities. For example, "I've known Sarah, one of the bridesmaids, since childhood, and her unwavering support and loyalty have always been a constant in my life. Her presence today is a reminder of the enduring nature of true friendship." This approach adds a touch of warmth and sincerity to your acknowledgement.
Remember, the key is to focus on the bridesmaids' positive contributions, personal qualities, and the unique value they bring to the wedding, rather than reducing them to their physical appearance or perpetuating sexist stereotypes. By following these guidelines, you can ensure that your comments are respectful and tasteful, creating a positive and inclusive atmosphere for everyone involved.
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Responding to the groom's thanks
As the best man, you are expected to respond to the groom's thanks on behalf of the bridesmaids. This is a great opportunity to inject some fun into the proceedings. However, it is important to keep your response respectful and avoid objectifying the bridesmaids. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft an appropriate and engaging response:
- Keep it Light-hearted: You can add a touch of humour to your response while maintaining respect for the bridesmaids. For example, you can acknowledge their beauty or elegance without veering into inappropriate territory.
- Self-deprecating Humour: Making yourself the butt of the joke is a safe and effective way to add levity to your response. For instance, you can joke about how the bridesmaids' beauty makes you feel inadequate or how you wish you had their support in finding love.
- Compliment the Bridesmaids: While you should avoid lewd comments, it is appropriate to compliment the bridesmaids on their appearance or their contribution to the wedding. You can mention how they have added a "fairy-tale" touch to the wedding or thank them for their support and wish them a happy future.
- Avoid Creepiness: Be mindful of the fine line between paying a compliment and being creepy. Refrain from making comments that objectify the bridesmaids or imply that they are part of your "harem." Remember that some of them may have partners present at the wedding, so keep your comments respectful and tasteful.
- Keep it Brief: You don't need to spend too much time responding to the groom's thanks. A short and sweet response is often more effective and will help maintain the flow of your speech.
- "My thanks to Dave on behalf of the bridesmaids for his kind words. They truly are a wonderful team, and their support and presence have made this day even more special. Cheers to the bridesmaids!"
- "I'd like to respond to the groom's kind words about the bridesmaids. They are not only stunning but also incredibly supportive. I know they will be there for the happy couple throughout their journey together. So, thank you, bridesmaids, and may your own dreams come true as beautifully as this day."
- "I'd like to echo the groom's sentiments and thank the bridesmaids. They have added so much joy and elegance to this celebration. Their friendship and support for the bride are a testament to their character. Here's to the bridesmaids and their unending loyalty and love!"
- "On behalf of the bridesmaids, I'd like to thank the groom for his kind words. They are a remarkable group of women, and their presence has truly enhanced this special day. Cheers to the bridesmaids and the happiness they bring!"
Remember to keep your response tasteful and avoid anything that might make the bridesmaids or other guests uncomfortable. You can find a balance between humour and sincerity while maintaining a respectful tone.
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Toasting the bridesmaids
The bridesmaids have put in a lot of effort to make this day special for the newlyweds, and it's time to appreciate them. As the best man, you are expected to respond to the groom's toast to the bridesmaids. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft a meaningful and fun tribute to the bridesmaids.
Keep it Respectful
While it is expected that you will compliment the bridesmaids and perhaps make a light-hearted joke, it is important to be respectful and avoid objectifying them. Remember, some of them may have partners in the audience, so keep your comments appropriate and avoid lewd jokes or innuendos. A self-deprecating joke is always a good option if you want to add some humour. For example: "How fantastic are our bridesmaids today? They look amazing, and they performed their role to perfection. As I was walking past them earlier, I heard them all talking about who will get to have the first dance with the best man later. "You!" "No! You!" "No way!" It was all very touching. At least, that's how I'm reading it."
Avoid Clichés
Try to avoid generic and overused phrases like "you all look so lovely" or "thank you for all your support". While these sentiments may be true, you can make your tribute more meaningful and memorable by sharing specific examples and anecdotes. For instance, you could mention how the bridesmaids went above and beyond to ensure the day ran smoothly, or recall a funny story from the preparations that showcases their dedication and friendship with the bride.
Make it Personal
Share a story or anecdote that involves the bridesmaids and ties into the theme of your speech. Perhaps they played a role in bringing the couple together, or they were a source of support during the wedding planning process. You could also share a light-hearted memory from the hen party or a story that showcases their unique dynamic with the bride. This will make your tribute more engaging and help the audience connect with the bridesmaids.
Keep it Brief
Remember that your speech should be concise, and a lengthy tribute to the bridesmaids may take away from the main focus of celebrating the newlyweds. Aim for a brief but heartfelt tribute that recognises their efforts and contributions without derailing the flow of your speech.
Sample Tribute
"I want to take a moment to recognise our wonderful bridesmaids. [Bridesmaid names], you ladies have gone above and beyond to ensure that today is perfect for [Bride and Groom]. Your support, enthusiasm, and attention to detail have made this day truly magical. I know [Bride] is incredibly grateful to have you by her side, and we are all thankful for the love and joy you've brought to this celebration. Cheers to the bridesmaids!"
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Frequently asked questions
It is customary for the best man to respond to the groom's toast to the bridesmaids. This can be done by simply thanking the bridesmaids for their support and complimenting their appearance. However, it is important to keep the tone respectful and avoid objectifying them. Injecting some humour into the speech is a good idea, as long as it is good-natured and self-deprecating.
A best man's speech should be kept concise and typically lasts around 8-10 minutes. It is important to be mindful of the audience's attention span and not make the speech too long.
When writing a best man's speech, it is important to focus on the newlyweds and their relationship rather than your friendship with the groom. Include meaningful compliments and well-wishes for the couple. Keep the language clean and avoid inside jokes or inappropriate topics. It is also a good idea to practice the speech beforehand and consider getting feedback from friends.