Donating Wedding Favors: A Guide To Giving Back

There's been a recent trend of couples choosing to make charitable donations in lieu of giving out wedding favours. This is a great way to celebrate a cause that's close to your heart with your community, gathered together in a spirit of love and kindness. It's also a way to avoid giving out trinkets that will likely be forgotten or thrown away. However, some guests may be upset by this choice, especially those from older generations who don't understand breaking from tradition. If you're thinking of making a charitable donation instead of giving wedding favours, there are a few things to keep in mind.

Choose a cause and organisation you're both passionate about

When deciding on a charitable organisation to donate to instead of giving out wedding favours, it's important to choose a cause that you and your partner are passionate about. This could be a cause that's close to your heart because it's local to your community, or it has affected you or someone you love. For example, you could donate to a hospital that treated your partner, or a local animal shelter that you both love.

It's a good idea to do some research to ensure that the organisations you choose are registered charities or non-profit organisations. You can also look into how much of your donation will go towards research, marketing, fundraising and administration. If you're having trouble choosing just one cause, you can split your donation between two or three different organisations. However, it's best to avoid anything controversial, such as politics, as not all your guests will share your views.

Some examples of non-controversial organisations to donate to include:

• Make-A-Wish Foundation
• Habitat for Humanity
• Cancer Society
• Breast Cancer Foundation
• Cystic Fibrosis Foundation
• Animal shelters
• Food banks

Determine the amount of the donation

Determining the Amount of the Donation

The amount you donate in lieu of wedding favors is entirely up to you. Most couples spend around $2-3 per guest on wedding favors, so you could use this as a starting point for deciding how much to donate. However, you should discuss this with your partner and decide on an amount that feels right for you both.

If you want to donate a larger amount, you could consider cutting back on other wedding expenses, such as flowers, attire, or photography. Alternatively, you could use some of the cash gifts you receive from guests to make a more substantial donation.

Remember that the goal of donating in lieu of wedding favors is to celebrate a cause you care about and share your joy with your community. So, choose an amount that feels comfortable for you and aligns with your values.

If you are having trouble deciding on an amount, you can explore organizations and causes that are important to you and research how much of your donation will go towards administrative costs versus directly impacting the cause. This information can help guide your decision on the amount you donate.

Some couples choose to split their donation among 2-3 different organizations if they have multiple causes they want to support. This can be a good option if you want to support multiple charities but don't want to choose just one.

Skip your guests' names on the donation

If you want to make a donation instead of buying wedding favours, it is totally fine to not mention your guests' names when you make the donation. This is because, as Kathleen Cover, a certified etiquette consultant, says, "for identity protection and to prevent organisations from possibly contacting your family members and friends for future donations, it is best not to release individual names or contact information without obtaining prior approval". In other words, it is best to not hand out any guest info.

Some people believe that you should not make a donation in lieu of wedding favours because the donation is not a favour to your guests. Instead, it is a favour to the organisation and to you. However, others believe that it is totally fine to make a donation instead of giving wedding favours, as long as you follow a few guidelines. One of these guidelines is to not make the donation in your guests' names.

If you do decide to make a donation in lieu of wedding favours, it is important to choose a charity that is important to you and that you have a connection to outside of the wedding. It is also important to not make the donation about getting attention or looking good. Instead, the focus should be on helping others.

Keep your guests in the loop

If you're wondering how to let your guests know about your charitable donation in place of wedding favours, you're not alone. It's tempting to include this information on your wedding invitations, but etiquette experts advise against this. Instead, save this information for your wedding programmes, wedding website, or both. This way, you'll have more room to share the story of why this particular charity is important to you, what your donation will support, and how it will make a difference.

• "In lieu of favours, we have made a donation to [Charity] in your name. Thank you for making someone's life a little sweeter!"
• "In lieu of wedding favours, we've taken your name and made a special donation to [Charity]."
• "In lieu of a favour, a donation has been made on your behalf to [Charity]. Thank you for helping to [explain how the donation will make a difference]."
• "In lieu of favours, the Bride & Groom have made a donation in your name to [Charity] to honour loved ones and their courageous battles."
• "We've chosen a special way to say thank you for sharing our wedding day. In lieu of a favour, a donation has been made to [Charity] in loving memory of [Loved One]. We feel the finest gift is one that helps others live longer and healthier lives."

Remember, this is your wedding, and it's a wonderful thing to spread love and make a positive impact. Most of your guests will sing praises for the idea of charitable donations as wedding favours, but you may encounter a few older guests who don't understand this break from tradition. At the end of the day, no one else's opinion matters but your own. If it makes your soul smile to spread loving-kindness during such a joyous new chapter, then go all in!

Steer clear of controversial organisations

When deciding on a charity to donate to instead of giving out wedding favours, it is important to steer clear of controversial organisations.

While the cause you donate to may not be everyone's cause, it should be one that the couple believes in. It is recommended to avoid donating to any controversial or political organisations. Politics should be kept out of your wedding day.

Some guests may not appreciate donations to controversial organisations, and it may become a divisive issue. It is best to choose a non-controversial charity, such as those that support the arts, help animals, or aid children. These are good options and are less likely to cause upset among your guests.

It is also important to choose a charity that is meaningful to the couple. It should be an organisation that the couple has a connection to outside of the wedding. This will help to show that the donation is not just about "looking good".

Frequently asked questions