Guide To Crafting Inclusive Wedding Invitations

Wedding invitation wording can be tricky, but it's a great opportunity to express your style and share important details about your big day. The key details to include are the host line, attendance request, couple's names, date and time, location, and reception information. Here's a guide on how to craft elegant and informative wedding invitations in the third person.

The host line names the hosts or honourary hosts of the event, traditionally the bride's parents. For a formal affair, you can include the full names of the hosts. If both sets of parents are contributing, you may write Together with their parents. When the couple is hosting, a simple The honour of your presence is requested will do.

The attendance request lets guests know what they're celebrating. Options include at the marriage of their daughter or at the celebration of their union.

The couple's names are usually displayed in larger, fancy text. For formal invitations, use full names and middle names. Same-sex couples can choose alphabetical order or what sounds best.

Dates and times are traditionally spelled out for formal invitations. For a 4:30 pm ceremony, write half after four o'clock in the afternoon.

The location includes the venue's name and full address, especially for out-of-town guests. Omit the street address for well-known institutions.

Finally, reception details can be added with Reception to follow or on a separate card for formal events.

How to word the host line

The host line is the opening line on a wedding invitation and names the hosts of the event. Here are some examples of how to word the host line for different scenarios:

One Set of Married Parents Hosting

Include the parents' full names (with middle names for very formal weddings). If they have different last names, write "and" to join the two names.

• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Timothy Williams (very formal; middle name is included)
• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Williams (formal)
• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher and Sarah Williams (formal; includes both first names)
• Christopher and Sarah Williams (less formal)

One Set of Divorced Parents Hosting

Include the mother's name first, followed by the father's name. Do not use "and" to connect the two names; instead, give each name its own line.

Both Sets of Parents Hosting

For different-sex couples, list the bride's parents' names at the top of the invite, followed by the groom's parents' names. For same-sex couples, list the names according to preference or in the order that looks best with the invitation design.

• Mr. and Mrs. Aaron Wong and Mr. and Mrs. Adam Hollis (formal)
• Aaron and Alisha Wong together with Adam and Beatrice Hollis (less formal)

Couple Is Hosting With Their Families

When the couple and both of their families are contributing to the cost of the wedding, many choose to add a line such as:

• Together with their families
• Together with our families
• Together with their parents

Couple Is Hosting Themselves

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, you can skip the host line altogether or start the invitation wording with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as:

• Together with full hearts
• With hearts full of love and joy

How to word the attendance request

Deciding on your guest list and how many plus-ones to allow can be a tricky part of wedding planning. There are no set rules, but there are some best practices and guidelines to help you navigate this process.

Firstly, it is important to consider your budget, vision for the day, and your guests' needs. You may have to make some tough decisions, but remember that it is your wedding, and you can't please everyone.

• Members of the couple's immediate family.
• Wedding party members.
• Outlier guests who won't know many other attendees.
• Couples who are married, engaged, or in a serious or long-term relationship (this can be defined as over six months).

If you are working with a tight budget or limited space, you may need to set some limits on plus-ones. It is generally considered good etiquette to allow plus-ones for guests who are married or engaged, and for those travelling or staying in accommodation for your wedding.

Now, onto the wording of the attendance request. Here are some suggestions:

For Guests Who Are Allowed a Plus-One

If you are inviting a guest who is allowed to bring a plus-one, there are a few ways to word this:

• On the outer envelope, include only the guest's name. On the inner envelope, include the guest's name followed by "and guest".
• Address the invitation to the primary guest's name and "invited guest".
• Address the invitation to the primary guest and include a plus-one note inside with the RSVP card.
• If you know the name of the plus-one, you can include their name on a separate line below the guest's name, both on the envelope and the invitation.

For Guests Who Are Not Allowed a Plus-One

If a guest is not allowed to bring a plus-one, simply address the invitation and envelope to the individual guest's name only. Do not include "and guest" or any other indication that a plus-one is allowed.

For Guests Whose Plus-One Status Is Unclear

If you are unsure whether a guest should receive a plus-one, it is best to use the wording “invited guest” rather than assuming they will bring someone. This adds formality and leaves the decision open-ended.

Other Tips

• Be proactive and make managing your guest list a priority.
• On the RSVP card, include a space for the primary guest to write the name of their plus-one. This will help with seating chart preparation and reception place cards.
• Be prepared to respond to guests who ask about a plus-one. Have a kind but firm explanation ready, such as, "We'd love to include everyone, but unfortunately, our budget only allowed us to invite close friends and family. We appreciate your understanding and hope to see you there!"
• Consider seating arrangements in advance to accommodate plus-ones and avoid any potential drama at the reception.

How to list names

When it comes to listing names on wedding invitations, there are a few different considerations to keep in mind. Here are some detailed guidelines to ensure your invitations are properly formatted and adhere to standard etiquette:

Names of the Couple

Traditionally, the bride's name is listed before the groom's name on wedding invitations. This is because, in traditional wedding etiquette, the bride's family is typically the host and financier of the wedding. However, modern couples often have more freedom to follow their own preferences. If the couple is hosting the wedding together, it is not uncommon to see the groom's name listed first, indicating that he is the head of the family or the main financier. For same-sex couples, names can be listed in alphabetical order or based on personal preference.

Married Couple With the Same Last Name

For a heterosexual couple using traditional honorifics, the outer envelope can be addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. [Husband's First Name] [Shared Last Name]." For a more modern approach, the outer envelope can be addressed to "Mr. [Husband's First Name] [Shared Last Name] and Mrs. [Wife's First Name] [Shared Last Name]." The inner envelope can then be more informal, addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. [Shared Last Name]" or the couple's first names.

Married Couple With Different Last Names

When addressing a married couple with different last names, their names are typically written on the same line on the outer envelope, with the woman's name listed first. For example, "Ms. [Wife's First Name] [Wife's Last Name] and Mr. [Husband's First Name] [Husband's Last Name]." If the combined names are too long, they can be listed separately. The inner envelope can then be more informal, such as "Ms. [Wife's First Name] and Mr. [Husband's First Name]" or their first names.

Unmarried Couple

For an unmarried couple living at the same address, both names should be included on separate lines on the outer envelope. List the person you are closest with first, or go in alphabetical order. The inner envelope can then be more informal, including just their surnames or first names. For example, "Mr. [First Person's Last Name] and Ms. [Second Person's Last Name]" or their first names.

Single Individuals

For a single female over the age of 18, use "Ms." on the outer envelope, and for those under 18, use "Miss." For a single male over the age of 18, use "Mr." If the individual is younger, no title is necessary. On the inner envelope, you can use just their surname or first name. If they have been offered a plus-one, you can indicate this by adding "and Guest" on the inner envelope only.

Children and Families

When inviting a family with young children under the age of 18, the outer envelope is reserved for the parent(s) or guardian(s) names only. List each child's name on the inner envelope, using "Miss" for girls under 18 and "Mr." for boys over 16. If you do not include each child's name, it implies that children are not invited. For families with children over 18, each child should receive their own invitation unless they live at home with their parents.

Distinguished Titles

If a guest has a distinguished title, such as a doctor, lawyer, judge, or military personnel, it is proper etiquette to address them by that title on the invitation envelope. For couples with distinguished titles, list the guest with the higher-ranking title first, followed by their partner's name.

Nicknames and Full Names

There is no set rule for using nicknames or full names on wedding invitations. Using full names adds a formal touch, while nicknames can be more casual and friendly. Consider your relationship with the guest and how they prefer to be addressed. If in doubt, it is best to use their full name or reach out to confirm their preferred name to avoid any confusion or offence.

How to include the date and time

When it comes to wedding invitations, the date and time are essential pieces of information. Here are some tips and guidelines on how to include them:

Writing the Date:

• Traditional Format: The traditional way to write the date is to spell out the day of the week, followed by the numerical date and the month. For example, "Saturday, the twenty-sixth of October". The day of the week is capitalised, and there is a comma after it. The year is usually written separately and in numerical form, e.g., "two thousand twenty-four".
• Compound Dates: For dates from the 21st to the 31st, use a hyphen, e.g., "the twenty-eighth of May".
• Casual Format: For a more casual wedding, you can simply write the date as "Saturday, May 17th, 2025".
• Day of the Week: Including the day of the week is recommended but not mandatory.

Writing the Time:

• Traditional Format: For a formal wedding, write out the time in full. For example, 3:30 pm would be written as "half after three o'clock". If your wedding starts on the hour, simply write the number and "o'clock", e.g., "four o'clock".
• Casual Format: For a more casual event, you can use numerals, e.g., "4pm" or "5:30pm". Ensure the format matches the style of writing the date.
• Time of Day: Include the time of day, such as "in the morning", "in the afternoon", or "in the evening". Morning is until noon, afternoon is from noon to 5 pm, and evening is from 5 pm onwards. You can omit "in the morning", "in the afternoon", or "in the evening" for times when there is no ambiguity, such as 8 am or 11 pm.
• Reception Time: If the reception follows immediately after the ceremony in the same location, you can write "Reception to follow" or "Dinner and dancing to follow". For receptions at a different time and/or location, include a separate reception card with the details.

Remember, while these are general guidelines, you can adapt them to fit your wedding's style and formality. Working with a stationer can help you figure out the best wording and format for your invitations.

How to include the location and reception details

When it comes to wedding invitations, there are a few key details you'll need to include, such as the date, time, and location of the ceremony and reception. If the ceremony and reception are held in the same location, you can simply include a line like "Reception to follow", "Celebration to follow", or "Dinner and dancing to follow". However, if your reception is at a different location, you'll need to include a separate reception card with the start time and address. Here are some tips for including the location and reception details in your wedding invitations:

Provide Clear and Concise Information:

• Include the name and address of both the ceremony and reception venues.
• If the ceremony and reception are at the same location, a simple line such as "Reception to follow" is sufficient.
• If the reception is at a different location, provide the venue name and full address, including the postcode or zip code.
• Include the start time for both the ceremony and reception, especially if they are at different times or locations.

Consider Additional Details:

• If your venue is off the beaten track or hard to find, consider including brief directions or a custom map on a separate insert.
• Mention any parking arrangements or transportation provided between the ceremony and reception venues.
• If there are accommodation options available for guests, include this information, along with booking instructions and contact details.
• Include your wedding website address on the invitation or on a separate card. Your website can provide additional details such as directions, accommodation options, and registry information.

Formatting and Design Tips:

• Be mindful of the font size and style to ensure all information is legible.
• If you have a lot of information to include, consider using inserts or additional cards to provide extra details without crowding the invitation.
• If you're having a formal wedding, write out the time rather than using numerals (e.g., "four o'clock in the afternoon").
• For casual weddings, using numerals for the time is acceptable (e.g., 4:00 pm).
• If the reception is at a different location, it's helpful to include directions or a map, especially for guests who may be unfamiliar with the area.

Frequently asked questions