Choosing Bridesmaids: A Uk Guide To Picking Your Wedding Crew

how to choose bridesmaids uk

Choosing your bridesmaids is an important part of wedding planning, and it can be a tricky decision. You might be feeling the pressure to ask all your friends and family, but it's important to remember that your bridesmaids are there to support you and make your day special. A good bridesmaid will be a genuine friend, supportive, fun, and happy to help with any tasks. It's also worth considering the number of bridesmaids you want to have – while there are no hard and fast rules, it's practical to consider the size of your wedding and your budget. You don't want to be footing the bill for 10 bridesmaid dresses! So, take a step back, think about who you really want standing by your side, and remember – it's your day!

Characteristics Values
Number of bridesmaids Relative to the size of the wedding, usually one bridesmaid for every 50 guests
Bridesmaids' tasks Help plan the day, attend fittings, provide emotional support, calm nerves on the day, help the bride get ready and go to the toilet, party
Budget Bridesmaids' dresses, shoes, jewellery, hair and makeup can be costly; consider asking bridesmaids to pay for their own
Type of bridesmaid Calm, capable, organised, available, supportive, happy to help, diplomatic, willing to endure endless wedding talk
Entourage environment Consider whether you want a crowd of bridesmaids or a more calm and serene morning with just one or two
Age of bridesmaids Older bridesmaids can help guide younger ones
Family members Sisters usually expect to be asked, but older sisters with kids may be relieved not to be included
Friends Choose close friends, not those you only see once a year at Christmas

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How many bridesmaids to choose

When deciding on the number of bridesmaids to choose, there are a few things to consider. Firstly, it is customary to have one bridesmaid and one usher for every 50 guests. So, for a small, intimate wedding, you may only need to ask your best friend, whereas a large celebration with 300 guests could call for six bridesmaids.

Another factor is the number of groomsmen. If your groom has chosen three groomsmen, you may want to opt for four bridesmaids to avoid having a lone maid. However, odd numbers are also fine, as long as your solo bridesmaid is comfortable with it.

The size of your wedding venue is also important. Cramming too many bridesmaids into a small space will look silly and be difficult to arrange.

Budget is often a deciding factor, as bridesmaids' dresses, shoes, jewellery, hair, and makeup can be costly. If you're paying for these, you may want to limit the number of bridesmaids.

The number of bridesmaids you choose will also depend on the tasks you want them to perform. If you want them to take part in a receiving line or walk around the altar, for example, you may prefer to have fewer bridesmaids to keep the procession from taking too long.

Finally, consider the atmosphere you want to create on the day. Do you want to get ready with a crowd of girls, or would you prefer a calmer environment with just your sister or best friend?

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Who to choose

Choosing your bridesmaids is a very personal decision and there are no hard and fast rules about how many you should have. However, there are a few things to consider when deciding who to choose.

First, think about the role you want your bridesmaids to play. Bridesmaids are there to support you and make your wedding planning journey less stressful and more enjoyable. They will be there to help you plan, go with you to fittings, and calm your nerves on the big day. So, choose someone who is calm, capable, organised, and available. It's also a good idea to select someone who is happy to muck in and help with tasks like writing place cards or doing online research. If you want your bridesmaids to be involved in planning your bachelorette party, choose someone who will arrange the event you want, rather than the one they think will make them laugh the most.

Second, consider the number of bridesmaids you want to have. This can depend on the size of your wedding and your budget. It is customary to have one bridesmaid and one usher for every 50 guests, but this is not mandatory. You can have as many or as few bridesmaids as you like, but remember that the more bridesmaids you have, the more coordinating and budgeting you will need to do. If you are paying for your bridesmaids' dresses, shoes, jewellery, hair, and makeup, you may want to have fewer bridesmaids. On the other hand, if you have a large wedding party, you can opt for more bridesmaids.

Third, don't feel pressured to choose certain people just because they are family or friends. It is common to feel like you want to include everyone when you are excited about your engagement. However, it's important to choose people who are genuinely close to you and who you can rely on. If you have to let someone down, you can give them another role in the wedding, such as doing a reading or arranging the flowers.

Finally, don't forget to have fun with your bridesmaids! They are there to help you create lasting memories and enjoy your special day.

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What they'll do

Bridesmaids are an integral part of your wedding day and will have a range of responsibilities in the lead-up to and on the day itself.

In the lead-up to the wedding, bridesmaids will be there to help you plan the day, come with you to fittings, and listen when the stress of organising the reception becomes overwhelming. They will also be involved in the planning of the hen party and will be there to calm your nerves and make you feel confident about your choices.

On the day itself, your bridesmaids will be there to help you get ready, steady your nerves, and ensure you look your best. They will help you with your dress, veil, and any other accessories, and make sure you are prepared for your grand entrance. They will also be on hand to help you with your toilet breaks—with small cubicles and large amounts of netting, it's not an easy task to do alone!

Throughout the day, your bridesmaids will also be there to ensure you are calm and relaxed. They will make sure you drink your tea through a straw so you don't smudge your makeup, tell you how stunning you look, and give you a 360-degree once-over to make sure there are no VPLs and that your shoes are on the right feet. They will also be there to party with you and ensure you have fun on your special day.

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How much it'll cost

The cost of being a bridesmaid in the UK varies depending on the couple, the bridesmaids, and everyone's finances. While the couple usually covers the cost of the bridesmaid dresses, the bridesmaids often pay for their shoes, accessories, hair, makeup, travel, accommodation, and hen party.

Bridesmaid Dresses

The couple usually covers the cost of the bridesmaid dresses, especially if they are asking their bridesmaids to wear a specific dress, colour, or style. However, bridesmaid dress alterations are typically paid for by the bridesmaids and can cost between £30-£100.

Bridesmaid Shoes and Accessories

Bridesmaids typically cover the cost of their own shoes and accessories, such as jewellery, hairpins, clutch bags, and jackets. These costs can add up, especially if the couple requests matching shoes or accessories.

Hair and Makeup

Hair and makeup for the bridesmaids are not compulsory, but if the couple requests or insists on professional styling, they should be prepared to pay for it. This can cost around £60-£80 for hair and makeup.

Travel and Accommodation

Bridesmaids usually pay for their own travel and accommodation, which can vary significantly depending on the wedding location. If the couple requests the bridesmaids to stay in a specific hotel, they should be considerate of the cost for their bridesmaids.

Hen Party

The hen party is typically organised and paid for by the bridesmaids or maid of honour. Destination hen parties can be particularly expensive, with about a third of bachelorette party-goers spending over £1000. Even local parties can incur significant costs for decor, games, food, and drinks.

Gifts

While not mandatory, it is customary for bridesmaids to give a gift to the couple. This does not have to be the most expensive item on the registry, and bridesmaids can consider chipping in with the other bridesmaids for a larger gift.

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What they'll wear

When it comes to choosing what your bridesmaids will wear, there are a few things to consider. Firstly, you'll want to decide whether you want your bridesmaids to wear matching dresses or choose their own outfits within certain guidelines. If you opt for matching dresses, you'll need to consider the different body types, styles, and budgets of your bridesmaids. A convertible dress in the same colour but with different configurations can be a great option, as it allows each bridesmaid to wear the dress in a way that suits them. If you'd prefer a uniform look, an A-line cut is universally flattering and a safe choice.

Another important consideration is the colour of the bridesmaids' outfits. You might want to choose a colour that complements your wedding dress or fits with the colour scheme of your wedding. For example, if you're having a laid-back beach-themed wedding, you might opt for vibrant turquoise or tropical hues. On the other hand, a vintage-style wedding might call for dresses with flouncy '50s skirts or tea-length cuts. If you're feeling daring, you could even opt for mismatched bridesmaid dresses with different textures or fashionable jumpsuits.

Don't forget to also take into account the formality of your wedding. If you're wearing a ball gown, for instance, your bridesmaids should also be dressed in formal, full-length dresses. Finally, you can tie everyone's look together with accessories like pashminas or stoles, and of course, the bridal bouquet.

Frequently asked questions

This depends on the size of your wedding. It's customary to have one bridesmaid and one usher for every 50 guests. However, there are no hard and fast rules, so ultimately, the number is up to you.

You should consider your budget, the size of your wedding, and whether you want to include friends or relatives. It's also important to choose someone calm, capable, organised, and available to help with wedding planning.

It's recommended to ask your bridesmaids between eight months to a year before your wedding. This gives you plenty of time to organise activities and avoid rushing the process.

You can ask your friends to be your bridesmaids by giving them a simple or extravagant gift, such as personalised pyjamas or a bridesmaid proposal box. You can also write a heartfelt note or card to show your gratitude.

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