The Ultimate Best Man's Guide To A Perfect Wedding

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour and a big responsibility. The best man is the groom's right-hand man and is responsible for providing support and assistance in any way possible before and during the wedding. The role is often given to the groom's brother, close relative, or best friend.

The best man's duties include planning the bachelor party, coordinating the groomsmen, helping the groom choose his wedding attire, giving a speech at the reception, and keeping the wedding rings safe on the big day. The best man also acts as a point of contact for everyone on the groom's side and may be asked to help with wedding planning and logistics.

In some cultures, the best man has additional responsibilities, such as leading processions at the wedding and preliminary events, guiding the newlyweds in the ways of marriage, or entertaining the guests.

Overall, the best man plays a crucial role in ensuring the groom's wedding day goes smoothly and is a fun and memorable occasion.

Help the groom get ready on the morning of the wedding

As the best man, you'll be the groom's right-hand man on the morning of the wedding. Here are some tips to help you fulfil your role and ensure the groom is ready for the big day:

Be Organised

Keep an eye on the time to ensure the groom and groomsmen are ready on time. Be the point of contact for the groomsmen and ensure they know where they need to be and when. You may also need to coordinate transportation for the wedding party.

Help the Groom Get Ready

On the morning of the wedding, be as hands-on as possible with any last-minute tasks. Help the groom with any outfit choices or adjustments, such as tying a tie or fastening a button. You could also offer to deliver the groom's morning suit if it's being hired.

Keep the Rings Safe

One of your most important duties is to keep the wedding rings safe. Make sure you have a secure place to store them and triple-check your pockets! If the ring bearer is carrying the rings on a pillow, you'll need to fasten them to the pillow before the processional and collect them from the ring bearer during the ceremony.

Calm the Nerves

The groom may be feeling nervous, so be a source of calm and positive energy. Reassure him and keep him focused. You could also be tasked with holding the groom's personal items, such as his phone or wallet, to ensure he's not distracted.

Greet the Guests

Along with the groom, welcome the arriving guests and create a warm and inviting atmosphere before the ceremony begins. Introduce yourself to any guests you don't know, so they know who to speak to if they have any questions.

Check in with the Groom

Even if it's just a quick chat, check in with the groom on the morning of the wedding. As his best man, you are his sounding board for any nerves or last-minute jitters.

By following these tips, you'll be able to effectively support the groom and ensure he's ready for his special day.

Plan the bachelor party

Planning a bachelor party can be stressful, but it doesn't have to be. Here is a step-by-step guide to help you plan an unforgettable celebration for the groom-to-be.

Step 1: Talk to the Groom

Before you start planning, it's important to get a sense of the groom's expectations for his bachelor party. Ask him if he wants a weekend getaway or a one-night bash, what types of activities he wants to do, and whether women will be invited. Be sure to also get his input on the guest list, including any family members or future in-laws he wants to include. While you can keep some specifics a surprise, getting his input will help you plan a celebration that he will truly enjoy and remember.

Step 2: Create the Guest List

When creating the guest list, try to keep it manageable as a large guest count can make planning more complicated, especially if there is travel involved. Be sure to invite the groom's closest friends and any family members or future in-laws he wants to include. If you want to include the groom's father or future father-in-law, a great option is to invite them to dinner or drinks before the nighttime activities begin. This way, they can still be part of the celebration but you can avoid any potential awkwardness later in the night.

Step 3: Set a Budget

Setting a budget for the bachelor party is crucial, and it's important to stick to it. Consider the finances of all the guests you are inviting, as you don't want to make the party too expensive and cause some guests to decline the invitation due to cost. Calculate all the anticipated costs for the night or weekend and have everyone pay ahead of time for the big group expenses. This will ensure you have the funds to cover costs like tickets, hotel rooms, etc. There are also apps, like Splitwise, that can help you keep track of who pays for what during the weekend.

Step 4: Choose a Date and Location

Now that you have your budget, you can decide on a date and location for the bachelor party. When choosing a location, keep your budget in mind and select a place that fits within it. Once you've decided on a location, be sure to book accommodations (flights, hotel rooms, transportation, etc.) in advance.

Step 5: Plan the Activities

It's always better to book activities in advance, especially for large groups. Scout out bars and restaurants you may want to visit and find some fun activities that the group can do together. The more you plan ahead, the less you'll have to worry about when the party arrives! Just remember, despite what you may have seen in the movies, it is never a good idea to throw the bachelor party the night before the wedding. There is too much that could go wrong, and you want the groom and his groomsmen to be well-rested for the big day.

Step 6: Send Out Invitations

Once you have a date and location, be sure to send out "Save the Date" notices to the guests to avoid any scheduling conflicts. These should be sent out at least 2-3 months in advance, especially if guests will need to travel. As the date gets closer, it's also a good idea to send an email with an itinerary for the night or weekend so guests know what to pack and how much money they should budget for the activities.

Give a best man's speech

The best man's speech is a big responsibility and a key part of the role. It's a chance to honour the groom with sincere well-wishes and lighthearted anecdotes, and it should be memorable and entertaining.

• Start preparing early. Giving yourself plenty of time will help you feel more comfortable and confident when it comes to delivering your speech.
• Practise your speech beforehand so that you feel comfortable with it.
• Be cheeky, but also consider your audience. Avoid anything too risque or embarrassing and run your speech past a trusted person to check the tone.
• Speak slowly and pause for laughter. Make sure you mention everyone who needs to be mentioned.
• Be aware of the timing. Speeches usually take place after the meal, but it's becoming more common to have them before so that the speaker can relax and enjoy their food afterwards.
• Know the order of the speeches. The best man's speech is traditionally last, after the father of the bride and the groom. This may change if there is a bride speech or maid of honour speech.

Good luck!

Keep the wedding rings safe

As the best man, you play a crucial role in the wedding ceremony, and one of your most important duties is to keep the wedding rings safe until it's time for the couple to exchange them. Here are some tips to ensure you fulfil this responsibility with ease:

Before the Wedding

Keeping the wedding rings safe starts well before the wedding day. Here are some things to keep in mind:

• Discuss with the couple whether you will be the ring bearer and the designated safekeeper of the rings.
• If you are given the rings ahead of time, ensure they are stored in a secure place. It is recommended to keep them in their original box or a ring box/soft cloth pouch.
• If the couple prefers to hand over the rings just before the ceremony, collect them on the morning of the wedding and keep them with you at all times.
• Double-check your pockets to ensure they don't have holes!
• If a young relative is carrying the rings down the aisle, you will need to fasten the rings securely to the pillow before the processional.

During the Wedding

On the wedding day, your focus should be on keeping the rings safe and being prepared to present them during the ceremony:

• Ensure you have the rings with you when you arrive at the venue, preferably at least twenty minutes before the ceremony begins.
• If you are the ring bearer, take your place at the altar with the groom, making sure the rings are ready for the exchange.
• If another person is carrying the rings, confirm that they have the rings before the ceremony begins.
• When the officiant calls for the rings, be prepared to present them promptly.

After the Exchange

Even after the couple exchanges the rings, your responsibility continues until the rings are safely returned to the newlyweds:

• After the ceremony, confirm that the rings are returned to the couple or a designated person, such as the maid of honour.
• If the couple is going on their honeymoon immediately, you may be asked to store the rings and other valuable items safely until they return.

Remember, as the best man, you are entrusted with a significant symbol of love and commitment. Keeping the wedding rings safe is a great honour and an essential part of creating beautiful memories for the couple on their special day.

Support the groom throughout the planning process

Being chosen as the best man is a great honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibilities. The best man is the groom's right-hand man and chief assistant, and it's your job to support the groom throughout the planning process and on the big day itself. Here are some ways you can support the groom in the lead-up to the wedding:

Help with Planning and Admin

While the best man isn't usually expected to pitch in with too much of the wedding planning, you can still offer to help. This could include booking vendors, managing RSVPs, or coordinating schedules. Even if you're not involved in the finer details, you can offer to set up, move furniture, and direct suppliers on the morning of the wedding.

Choose the Groomsmen's Attire

As best man, you'll be in charge of helping the groom choose and rent or buy wedding formalwear, as well as coordinating the other groomsmen's ensembles. This might include gathering everyone's measurements, giving the group an order-by deadline, or even placing the order yourself.

Organise the Bachelor Party

Planning an epic stag do or bachelor party is one of the best man's most important duties. You'll need to check with the groom for a list of people he'd like to attend and think carefully about locations and budgets. Pick two or three dates and ask the rest of the group which they can make, then plan an event that aligns with the groom's wishes.

Be a Sounding Board and Provide Emotional Support

The groom is likely to have wedding jitters and nerves, so it's your job to be a sounding board and provide emotional support. Be there to listen to any confessions, complaints, or questions, and reassure your friend that everything will be okay.

Attend the Rehearsal and Rehearsal Dinner

You'll need to attend the wedding rehearsal and rehearsal dinner to support the groom and the rest of the wedding party. This is also a great opportunity to bond with the other half of the wedding party and the couple's relatives.

Stay with the Groom the Night Before

Traditionally, the best man stays with the groom the night before the wedding. Keep the groom company, but make sure he doesn't drink too much or eat anything that might cause an issue the next day.

Check in with the Groom

The wedding is a stressful time, so make sure to check in with the groom and offer support and encouragement. Be his confidant and help him manage any nerves or wedding anxiety.

Frequently asked questions